scaramouche-第89章

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It　is　time　to　go。　　I　make　no　sacrifice　in　going。〃

〃But　where　will　you　go？　　What　will　you　do？〃

〃Oh；　something。　　Consider　that　in　four　years　I　have　been　lawyer；
politician；　swordsman；　and　buffoon　…　especially　the　latter。　　There
is　always　a　place　in　the　world　for　Scaramouche。　　Besides；　do　you
know　that　unlike　Scaramouche　I　have　been　oddly　provident？　　I　am
the　owner　of　a　little　farm　in　Saxony。　　I　think　that　agriculture
might　suit　me。　　It　is　a　meditative　occupation；　and　when　all　is　said；
I　am　not　a　man　of　action。　　I　haven't　the　qualities　for　the　part。〃

She　looked　up　into　his　face；　and　there　was　a　wistful　smile　in　her
deep　blue　eyes。

〃Is　there　any　part　for　which　you　have　not　the　qualities；　I　wonder？〃

〃Do　you　really？　　Yet　you　cannot　say　that　I　have　made　a　success　of
any　of　those　which　I　have　played。　　I　have　always　ended　by　running
away。　　I　am　running　away　now　from　a　thriving　fencing…academy；　which
is　likely　to　become　the　property　of　Le　Duc。　　That　comes　of　having
gone　into　politics；　from　which　I　am　also　running　away。　　It　is　the
one　thing　in　which　I　really　excel。　　That；　too；　is　an　attribute　of
Scaramouche。〃

〃Why　will　you　always　be　deriding　yourself？〃　she　wondered。

〃Because　I　recognize　myself　for　part　of　this　mad　world；　I　suppose。
You　wouldn't　have　me　take　it　seriously？　　I　should　lose　my　reason
utterly　if　I　did；　especially　since　discovering　my　parents。〃

〃Don't；　Andre！〃　she　begged　him。　〃You　are　insincere；　you　know。〃

〃Of　course　I　am。　　Do　you　expect　sincerity　in　man　when　hypocrisy　is
the　very　keynote　of　human　nature？　　We　are　nurtured　on　it；　we　are
schooled　in　it；　we　live　by　it；　and　we　rarely　realize　it。　　You　have
seen　it　rampant　and　out　of　hand　in　France　during　the　past　four
years　…　cant　and　hypocrisy　on　the　lips　of　the　revolutionaries；
cant　and　hypocrisy　on　the　lips　of　the　upholders　of　the　old　regime；
a　riot　of　hypocrisy　out　of　which　in　the　end　is　begotten　chaos。
And　I　who　criticize　it　all　on　this　beautiful　God…given　morning　am
the　rankest　and　most　contemptible　hypocrite　of　all。　　It　was　this
…　the　realization　of　this　truth　kept　me　awake　all　night。　　For　two
years　I　have　persecuted　by　every　means　in　my　power。。。　M。　de　La　Tour
d'Azyr。〃

He　paused　before　uttering　the　name；　paused　as　if　hesitating　how　to
speak　of　him。

〃And　in　those　two　years　I　have　deceived　myself　as　to　the　motive
that　was　spurring　me。　　He　spoke　of　me　last　night　as　the　evil　genius
of　his　life；　and　himself　he　recognized　the　justice　of　this。　　It　may
be　that　he　was　right；　and　because　of　that　it　is　probable　that　even
had　he　not　killed　Philippe　de　Vilmorin；　things　would　still　have
been　the　same。　　Indeed；　to…day　I　know　that　they　must　have　been。
That　is　why　I　call　myself　a　hypocrite；　a　poor；　self…duping　hypocrite。〃

〃But　why；　Andre？〃

He　stood　still　and　looked　at　her。　　〃Because　he　sought　you；　Aline。
Because　in　that　alone　he　must　have　found　me　ranged　against　him；
utterly　intransigeant。　　Because　of　that　I　must　have　strained　every
nerve　to　bring　him　down　…　so　as　to　save　you　from　becoming　the　prey
of　your　own　ambition。

〃I　wish　to　speak　of　him　no　more　than　I　must。　　After　this；　I　trust
never　to　speak　of　him　again。　　Before　the　lines　of　our　lives　crossed；
I　knew　him　for　what　he　was；　I　knew　the　report　of　him　that　ran　the
countryside。　　Even　then　I　found　him　detestable。　　You　heard　him
allude　last　night　to　the　unfortunate　La　Binet。　　You　heard　him　plead；
in　extenuation　of　his　fault；　his　mode　of　life；　his　rearing。　　To　that
there　is　no　answer；　I　suppose。　　He　conforms　to　type。　　Enough！　　But
to　me；　he　was　the　embodiment　of　evil；　just　as　you　have　always　been
the　embodiment　of　good；　he　was　the　embodiment　of　sin；　just　as　you
are　the　embodiment　of　purity。　　I　had　enthroned　you　so　high；　Aline；
so　high；　and　yet　no　higher　than　your　place。　　Could　I；　then；　suffer
that　you　should　be　dragged　down　by　ambition；　could　I　suffer　the
evil　I　detested　to　mate　with　the　good　I　loved？　　　What　could　have
come　of　it　but　your　own　damnation；　as　I　told　you　that　day　at
Gavrillac？　　Because　of　that　my　detestation　of　him　became　a　personal；
active　thing。　　I　resolved　to　save　you　at　all　costs　from　a　fate　so
horrible。　　Had　you　been　able　to　tell　me　that　you　loved　him　it　would
have　been　different。　　I　should　have　hoped　that　in　a　union　sanctified
by　love　you　would　have　raised　him　to　your　own　pure　heights。　　But
that　out　of　considerations　of　worldly　advancement　you　should
lovelessly　consent　to　mate　with　him。。。　Oh；　it　was　vile　and　hopeless。
And　so　I　fought　him　…　a　rat　fighting　a　lion　…　fought　him　relentlessly
until　I　saw　that　love　had　come　to　take　in　your　heart　the　place　of
ambition。　　Then　I　desisted。〃

〃Until　you　saw　that　love　had　taken　the　place　of　ambition！〃　　Tears
had　been　gathering　in　her　eyes　whilst　he　was　speaking。　　Now
amazement　eliminated　her　emotion。　　〃But　when　did　you　see　that？
When？〃

〃I　…　I　was　mistaken。　　I　know　it　now。　　Yet；　at　the　time。。。　surely；
Aline；　that　morning　when　you　came　to　beg　me　not　to　keep　my
engagement　with　him　in　the　Bois；　you　were　moved　by　concern　for　him？〃

〃For　him！　　It　was　concern　for　you；〃　she　cried；　without　thinking
what　she　said。

But　it　did　not　convince　him。　　〃For　me？　　When　you　knew　…　when　all
the　world　knew　what　I　had　been　doing　daily　for　a　week！〃

〃Ah；　but　he；　he　was　different　from　the　others　you　had　met。　　His
reputation　stood　high。　　My　uncle　accounted　him　invincible；　he
persuaded　me　that　if　you　met　nothing　could　save　you。〃

He　looked　at　her　frowning。

〃Why　this；　Aline？〃　he　asked　her　with　some　sternness。　　〃I　can
understand　that；　having　changed　since　then；　you　should　now　wish
to　disown　those　sentiments。　　It　is　a　woman's　way；　I　suppose。〃

〃Oh；　what　are　you　saying；　Andre？　　How　wrong　you　are！　　It　is　the
truth　I　have　told　you！〃

〃And　was　it　concern　for　me；〃　he　asked　her；　〃that　laid　you　swooning
when　you　saw　him　return　wounded　from　the　meeting？　　That　was　what
opened　my　eyes。〃

〃Wounded？　　I　had　not　seen　his　wound。　　I　saw　him　sitting　alive　and
apparently　unhurt　in　his　caleche；　and　I　concluded　that　he　had
killed　you　as　he　had　said　he　would。　　What　else　could　I　conclude？〃

He　saw　light；　dazzling；　blinding；　and　it　scared　him。　　He　fell　back；
a　hand　to　his　brow。　　〃And　that　was　why　you　fainted？〃　he　asked
incredulously。

She　looked　at　him　without　answering。　　As　she　began　to　realize　how
much　she　had　been　swept　into　saying　by　her　eagerness　to　make　him
realize　his　error；　a　sudden　fear　came　creeping　into　her　eyes。

He　held　out　both　hands　to　her。

〃Aline！　　Aline！〃　His　voice　broke　on　the　name。　　〃It　was　I。。。　〃

〃0　blind　Andre；　it　was　always　you　…　always！　　Never；　never　did　I
think　of　him；　not　even　for　loveless　marriage；　save　once　for　a
little　while；　when。。。　when　that　theatre　girl　came　into　your　life；
and　then。。。　〃　　She　broke　off；　shrugged；　and　turned　her　head　away。
〃I　thought　of　following　ambition；　since　there　was　nothing　left
to　follow。〃

He　shook　himself。　　〃I　am　dreaming；　of　course；　or　else　I　am　mad；〃
he　said。

〃Blind；　Andre；　just　blind；〃　she　assured　him。

〃Blind　only　where　it　would　have　been　presumption　to　have　seen。〃

〃And　yet；〃　she　answered　him　with　a　flash　of　the　Aline　he　had　known
of　old；　〃I　have　never　found　you　lack　presumption。〃

M。　de　Kercadiou；　emerging　a　moment　later　from　the　library　window；
beheld　them　holding　hands　and　staring　each　at　the　other；
beatifically；　as　if　each　saw　Paradise　in　the　other's　face。







End