camille-第36章

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　I　should　stay；　but；　seeing　that　if　I　did　not　carry　out　my　intention　the　consequences；　in　the　state　in　which　I　was；　might　be　fatal；　he　embraced　me；　and　begged　me；　almost；　with　tears；　to　return　without　delay。

I　did　not　sleep　on　the　way　to　Paris。　Once　there；　what　was　I　going　to　do？　I　did　not　know；　I　only　knew　that　it　must　be　something　connected　with　Marguerite。　I　went　to　my　rooms　to　change　my　clothes；　and；　as　the　weather　was　fine　and　it　was　still　early；　I　made　my　way　to　the　Champs…Elysees。　At　the　end　of　half　an　hour　I　saw　Marguerite's　carriage；　at　some　distance；　coming　from　the　Rond…Point　to　the　Place　de　la　Concorde。　She　had　repurchased　her　horses；　for　the　carriage　was　just　as　I　was　accustomed　to　see　it；　but　she　was　not　in　it。　Scarcely　had　I　noticed　this　fact；　when　looking　around　me；　I　saw　Marguerite　on　foot；　accompanied　by　a　woman　whom　I　had　never　seen。

As　she　passed　me　she　turned　pale；　and　a　nervous　smile　tightened　about　her　lips。　For　my　part；　my　heart　beat　violently　in　my　breast；　but　I　succeeded　in　giving　a　cold　expression　to　my　face；　as　I　bowed　coldly　to　my　former　mistress；　who　just　then　reached　her　carriage；　into　which　she　got　with　her　friend。

I　knew　Marguerite：　this　unexpected　meeting　must　certainly　have　upset　her。　No　doubt　she　had　heard　that　I　had　gone　away；　and　had　thus　been　reassured　as　to　the　consequences　of　our　rupture；　but；　seeing　me　again　in　Paris；　finding　herself　face　to　face　with　me；　pale　as　I　was；　she　must　have　realized　that　I　had　not　returned　without　purpose；　and　she　must　have　asked　herself　what　that　purpose　was。

If　I　had　seen　Marguerite　unhappy；　if；　in　revenging　myself　upon　her；　I　could　have　come　to　her　aid；　I　should　perhaps　have　forgiven　her；　and　certainly　I　should　have　never　dreamt　of　doing　her　an　injury。　But　I　found　her　apparently　happy；　some　one　else　had　restored　to　her　the　luxury　which　I　could　not　give　her；　her　breaking　with　me　seemed　to　assume　a　character　of　the　basest　self…interest；　I　was　lowered　in　my　own　esteem　as　well　as　in　my　love。　I　resolved　that　she　should　pay　for　what　I　had　suffered。

I　could　not　be　indifferent　to　what　she　did；　consequently　what　would　hurt　her　the　most　would　be　my　indifference；　it　was；　therefore；　this　sentiment　which　I　must　affect；　not　only　in　her　eyes；　but　in　the　eyes　of　others。

I　tried　to　put　on　a　smiling　countenance；　and　I　went　to　call　on　Prudence。　The　maid　announced　me；　and　I　had　to　wait　a　few　minutes　in　the　drawing…room。　At　last　Mme。　Duvernoy　appeared　and　asked　me　into　her　boudoir；　as　I　seated　myself　I　heard　the　drawing…room　door　open；　a　light　footstep　made　the　floor　creak　and　the　front　door　was　closed　violently。

〃I　am　disturbing　you；〃　I　said　to　Prudence。

〃Not　in　the　least。　Marguerite　was　there。　When　she　heard　you　announced；　she　made　her　escape；　it　was　she　who　has　just　gone　out。〃

〃Is　she　afraid　of　me　now？〃

〃No。　but　she　is　afraid　that　you　would　not　wish　to　see　her。〃

〃But　why？〃　I　said；　drawing　my　breath　with　difficulty；　for　I　was　choked　with　emotion。　〃The　poor　girl　left　me　for　her　carriage；　her　furniture；　and　her　diamonds；　she　did　quite　right；　and　I　don't　bear　her　any　grudge。　I　met　her　to…day；〃　I　continued　carelessly。

〃Where？〃　asked　Prudence；　looking　at　me　and　seeming　to　ask　herself　if　this　was　the　same　man　whom　she　had　known　so　madly　in　love。

〃In　the　Champs…Elysees。　She　was　with　another　woman；　very　pretty。　Who　is　she？〃

〃What　was　she　like？〃

〃Blonde；　slender；　with　side　curls；　blue　eyes；　very　elegant。〃

〃Ali！　It　was　Olympe；　she　is　really　very　pretty。〃

〃Whom　does　she　live　with？〃

〃With　nobody；　with　anybody。〃

〃Where　does　she　live？〃

〃Rue　Troncliet；　No。。　Do　you　want　to　make　love　to　her？〃

〃One　never　knows。〃

〃And　Marguerite？〃

〃I　should　hardly　tell　you　the　truth　if　I　said　I　think　no　more　about　her；　but　I　am　one　of　those　with　whom　everything　depends　on　the　way　in　which　one　breaks　with　them。　Now　Marguerite　ended　with　me　so　lightly　that　I　realize　I　was　a　great　fool　to　have　been　as　much　in　love　with　her　as　I　was；　for　I　was　really　very　much　in　love　with　that　girl。〃

You　can　imagine　the　way　in　which　I　said　that；　the　sweat　broke　out　on　my　forehead。

〃She　was　very　fond　of　you；　you　know；　and　she　still　is；　the　proof　is；　that　after　meeting　you　to…day；　she　came　straight　to　tell　me　about　it。　When　she　got　here　she　was　all　of　a　tremble；　I　thought　she　was　going　to　faint。〃

〃Well；　what　did　she　say？〃

〃She　said；　'He　is　sure　to　come　here；'　and　she　begged　me　to　ask　you　to　forgive　her。〃

〃I　have　forgiven　her；　you　may　tell　her。　She　was　a　good　girl；　but；　after　all；　like　the　others；　and　I　ought　to　have　expected　what　happened。　I　am　even　grateful　to　her；　for　I　see　now　what　would　have　happened　if　I　had　lived　with　her　altogether。　It　was　ridiculous。〃

〃She　will　be　very　glad　to　find　that　you　take　it　so　well。　It　was　quite　time　she　left　you；　my　dear　fellow。　The　rascal　of　an　agent　to　whom　she　had　offered　to　sell　her　furniture　went　around　to　her　creditors　to　find　out　how　much　she　owed；　they　took　fright；　and　in　two　days　she　would　have　been　sold　up。〃

〃And　now　it　is　all　paid？〃

〃More　or　less。〃

〃And　who　has　supplied　the　money？〃

〃The　Comte　de　N。　Ah；　my　dear　friend；　there　are　men　made　on　purpose　for　such　occasions。　To　cut　a　long　story　short　he　gave　her　twenty　thousand　francs；　but　he　has　had　his　way　at　last。　He　knows　quite　well　that　Marguerite　is　not　in　love　with　him；　but　he　is　very　nice　with　her　all　the　same。　As　you　have　seen；　he　has　repurchased　her　horses；　he　has　taken　her　jewels　out　of　pawn；　and　he　gives　her　as　much　money　as　the　duke　used　to　give　her；　if　she　likes　to　live　quietly；　he　will　stay　with　her　a　long　time。〃

〃And　what　is　she　doing？　Is　she　living　in　Paris　altogether？〃

〃She　would　never　go　back　to　Bougival　after　you　went。　I　had　to　go　myself　and　see　after　all　her　things；　and　yours；　too。　I　made　a　package　of　them　and　you　can　send　here　for　them。　You　will　find　everything；　except　a　little　case　with　your　initials。　Marguerite　wanted　to　keep　it。　If　you　really　want　it；　I　will　ask　her　for　it。〃

〃Let　her　keep　it；〃　I　stammered；　for　I　felt　the　tears　rise　from　my　heart　to　my　eyes　at　the　recollection　of　the　village　where　I　had　been　so　happy；　and　at　the　thought　that　Marguerite　cared　to　keep　something　which　had　belonged　to　me　and　would　recall　me　to　her。　If　she　had　entered　at　that　moment　my　thoughts　of　vengeance　would　have　disappeared；　and　I　should　have　fallen　at　her　feet。

〃For　the　rest；〃　continued　Prudence；　〃I　never　saw　her　as　she　is　now；　she　hardly　takes　any　sleep；　she　goes　to　all　the　balls；　she　goes　to　suppers；　she　even　drinks。　The　other　day；　after　a　supper；　she　had　to　stay　in　bed　for　a　week；　and　when　the　doctor　let　her　get　up；　she　began　again　at　the　risk　of　her　life。　Shall　you　go　and　see　her？〃

〃What　is　the　good？　I　came　to　see　you；　because　you　have　always　been　charming　to　me；　and　I　knew　you　before　I　ever　knew　Marguerite。　I　owe　it　to　you　that　I　have　been　her　lover；　and　also；　don't　I；　that　I　am　her　lover　no　longer？〃

〃Well；　I　did　all　I　could　to　get　her　away　from　you；　and　I　believe　you　will　be　thankful　to　me　later　on。〃

I　owe　you　a　double　gratitude；〃　I　added；　rising；　for　I　was　disgusted　with　the　woman；　seeing　her　take　every　word　I　said　to　her　as　if　it　were　serious。

〃You　are　going？〃

〃Yes。〃

I　had　learned　enough。

〃When　shall　I　be　seeing　you？〃

〃Soon。　Good…bye。〃

〃Good…bye。〃

Prudence　saw　me　to　the　door；　and　I　went　back　to　my　own　rooms　with　tears　of　rage　in　my　eyes　and　a　desire　for　vengeance　in　my　heart。

So　Marguerite　was　no　different　from　the　others；　so　the　steadfast　love　that　she　had　had　for　me　could　not　resist　the　desire　of　returning　to　her　former　life；　and　the　need　of　having　a　carriage　and　plunging　into　dissipation。　So　I　said　to　myself；　as　I　lay　awake　at　night　though　if　I　had　reflected　as　calmly　as　I　professed　to　I　should　have　seen　in　this　new　and　turbulent　life　of　Marguerite　the　attempt　to　silence　a　constant　thought；　a　ceaseless　memory。　Unfortunately；　evil　passion　had　the　upper　hand；　and　I　only　sought　for　some　means　of　avenging　myself　on　the　poor　creature。　Oh；　how　petty　and　vile　is　man　when　he　is　wounded　in　one　of　his　narrow　passions！

This　Olympe　whom　I　had　seen　was；　if　not　a　friend　of　Marguerite；　at　all　events　the　woman　with　whom　she　was　most　often　seen　since　her　return　to　Paris。　She　was　going　to　give　a　ball；　and；