the choir invisible-第44章
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this house； about the room in it built for him； about the negros she had bought； the land she was clearing； the changes and improvements everywhere： as to many things she wanted his advice。 That year also she sent back to Virginia for flower…seed and shrub and plantsthe same old familiar ones that had grown on her father's lawn； in the garden； about the walls； along the watersome of which had been bought over from England： the flags； the lilies； honeysuckles； calacanthus； snowdrops； rosesall of them。 Speaking of this； she wrote him that of course that most of these would have to be set out that autumn； and little could be done for grounds till the following season； but the house！it was to be finished before winter set in。 In the last of these letters； she ended by saying： 〃I think I know now the very day you will be coming back。 I can hear your horse's feet rustling in the leaves ofI saidOctober； but I will say November this time。〃
His replies were unsatisfying。 There had been the short； hurried； earnest letter； speaking of Major Falconer's death： that was all right。 But since then a vague blinding mist had seemed to lie between her eyes and every page。 Something was kept hiddensome new trouble。 〃I shall understand everything when he comes！〃 she would say to herself each time。 〃I can wait。〃 Her buoyancy was irrepressible。
Late that autumn the house was finishedone of those early country…places yet to be seen here and there on the landscape of Kentucky； marking the building era of the aristocratic Virginians and renewing in the wilderness the architecture of the James。
She had taken such delight in furnishing her room： in the great bedstead with its mighty posts； its high tester； its dainty； hiding curtains； such delight in choosing； in bleaching； in weaving the linen for it！ And the pillowcaseshow expectant they were on the two pillows now set side by side at the head of the bed； with the delicate embroidery in the centre of each！ At first she had thought of working her initials within an oval…shaped vine； but one day； her needle suddenly arrested in the air； she had simply worked a rose。
Late one afternoon； when the blue of Indian summer lay on the walls of the forest like a still sweet veil； she came home from a walk in the woods。 Her feet had been rustling among the brown leaves and each time she had laughed。 At her round white throat she had pinned a scarlet leaf； from an old habit of her girlhood。 But was not Kentucky turning into Virginia？ Was not womanhood becoming girlhood again？ She was still so youngonly thirty…eight。 She had the right to be bringing in from the woods a bunch of the purple violets of November。
She sat down in her shadowy room before the deep fireplace； where there was such comfort now； such loneliness。 In early years at such hours she had like to play。 She resolved to get her a spinet。 Yes； and she would have myrtle…berry candles instead of tallow； and a slender…legged mahogany table beside which to read again in the Spectator and 〃Tom Jones。〃 As nearly as she could she would bring back everything that she had been used to in her childhoodwas not all life still before her？ If he were coming； it must be soon； and she would know what had been keeping himwhat it was that had happened。 She had walked to meet him so many times already。 And the heartless little gusts of wind； starting up among the leaves in the woods； how often they had fooled her ear and left her white and trembling！
The negro boy who had been sent to town on other business and to fetch the mail； soon afterwards knocked and entered。 There was a letter from hima short one and a paper。 She read the letter and could not believe her own eyes； could not believe her own mind。 Then she opened the paper and read the announcement of it printed there〃： he was married。
That night in her bedroomwith the great clock measuring out life in the cornerthe red logs turning slowly to ashesthe crickets under the bricks of the hearth singing of summer gonethat night； sitting by the candle…stand； where his letter lay opened； in a nightgown white as white samite； she loosened the folds of her heavy lustrous hairwave upon waveuntil the edges that rippled over her forehead rippled down over her knees。 With the loosening of her hair somehow had come the loosening of her tears。 And with the loosening of her tears came the loosening of her hold upon what she； until this night； had never acknowledged to herselfher love for him； the belief that he had loved her。
The next morning the parson； standing a white； cold shepherd before his chilly wilderness flock； preached a sermon from the text： 〃I shall go softly all my years。〃 While the heads of the rest were bowed during the last moments of prayer； she rose and slipped out。
〃Yes；〃 she said to herself； gathering her veil closely about her face as she alighted at the door of her house and the withered leaves of November were whirled fiercely about her feet； 〃I shall go softly all my years。〃
XXIII
AFTER this the years were swept along。 Fast came the changes in Kentucky。 The prophecy which John Gray had made to his school…children passed to its realization and reality went far beyond it。 In waves of migration； hundreds upon hundreds of thousands of settlers of the Anglo…Saxon race hurried into the wilderness and there jostled and shouldered each other in the race passion of soil…owning and home…building； or always farther westward they rushed； pushing the Indian back。 Lexington became the chief manufacturing town of the new civilization； thronged by merchants and fur…clad traders； gathered into it were men and women making a society that would have been brilliant in the capitals of the East； at its bar were heard illustrious voices； the echoes of which are not yet dead； are past all dying； the genius of young Jouett found for itself the secret of painting canvases so luminous and true that never since in the history of the State have they been equalled； the Transylvania University arose with lecturers famous enough to be known in Europe： students of law and medicine travelled to it from all parts of the land。
John Gray's school…children grew to be men and women。 For the men there were no longer battles to fight in Kentucky； but there were the wars of the Nation； and far away on the widening boundaries of the Republic they conquered or failed and fell； as volunteers with Perry in the victory on Lake Erie； in the awful massacre at the River Raisin； under Harrison at the Thames； in the mud and darkness of the Mississippi at New Orleans； repelling Pakenham's charge with Wellington's veteran； victory…flushed campaigners。
The school…master's friend； the parson； he too had known his more peaceful warfare； having married and become a manifold father。 Of a truth it was feared at one period that the parson was running altogether to prayers and daughters。 For it was remarked that with each birth； his petitions seemed longer and his voice to rise from behind the chancel with a fresh wail as of one who felt a growing grievance both against himself and the almighty。 Howbeit； innocently enough after the appearance of the fifth female infant； one morning he preached the words： 〃No man knoweth what manner of creature he is〃； and was unaware that a sudden smile rippled over the faces of his hearers。 But it was not until later on when mother and six were packed into one short pew at morning service； that they became known in a body as the parson's Collect for all Sundays。
Sometimes the little ones were divided and part of them sat in another pew where there was a single occupanta womanchildless。
〃Yes〃；〃 she had said； 〃I shall go softly all my years。〃
The plants she had brought that summer from Virginia had long since become old bushes。 The Virginia Creeper had climbed to the tops of the trees。 The garden； though in the same spot； was another place now； with vine…heavy arbours and sodden walks running between borders of flowers and vegetablesdaffodils and thymein the quaint Virginia fashion。 There was a lawn covered as the ancestral one had been with the feathery grass of England。 There was a park where the deer remained at home in their wilderness。
Crowning this landscape of comfort and good taste； s
