letters to his son, 1746-47-第4章
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is another most exquisite pleasure; is it not? As to running after
women; the consequences of that vice are only the loss of one's nose;
the total destruction of health; and; not unfrequently; the being run
through the body。
These; you see; are all trifles; yet this is the catalogue of pleasures
of most of those young people; who never reflecting themselves; adopt;
indiscriminately; what others choose to call by the seducing name of
pleasure。 I am thoroughly persuaded you will not fall into such errors;
and that; in the choice of your amusements; you will be directed by
reason; and a discerning taste。 The true pleasures of a gentleman are
those of the table; but within the bound of moderation; good company;
that is to say; people of merit; moderate play; which amuses; without any
interested views; and sprightly gallant conversations with women of
fashion and sense。
These are the real pleasures of a gentleman; which occasion neither
sickness; shame; nor repentance。 Whatever exceeds them; becomes low
vice; brutal passion; debauchery; and insanity of; mind; all of which;
far from giving satisfaction; bring on dishonor and disgrace。 Adieu。
LETTER VI
LONDON; March 6; O。 S。 1747
DEAR BOY: Whatever you do; will always affect me; very sensibly; one way
or another; and I am now most agreeably affected; by two letters; which I
have lately seen from Lausanne; upon your subject; the one from Madame
St。 Germain; the other from Monsieur Pampigny: they both give so good an
account of you; that I thought myself obliged; in justice both to them
and; to you; to let you know it。 Those who deserve a good character;
ought to have the satisfaction of knowing that they have it; both as a
reward and as an encouragement。 They write; that you are not only
'decrotte;' but tolerably well…bred; and that the English crust of
awkward bashfulness; shyness; and roughness (of which; by the bye; you
had your share) is pretty well rubbed off。 I am most heartily glad of
it; for; as I have often told you; those lesser talents; of an engaging;
insinuating manner; an easy good…breeding; a genteel behavior and
address; are of infinitely more advantage than they are generally thought
to be; especially here in England。 Virtue and learning; like gold; have
their intrinsic value but if they are not polished; they certainly lose a
great deal of their luster; and even polished brass will pass upon more
people than rough gold。 What a number of sins does the cheerful; easy
good…breeding of the French frequently cover? Many of them want common
sense; many more common learning; but in general; they make up so much by
their manner; for those defects; that frequently they pass undiscovered:
I have often said; and do think; that a Frenchman; who; with a fund of
virtue; learning and good sense; has the manners and good…breeding of his
country; is the perfection of human nature。 This perfection you may; if
you please; and I hope you will; arrive at。 You know what virtue is: you
may have it if you will; it is in every man's power; and miserable is the
man who has it not。 Good sense God has given you。 Learning you already
possess enough of; to have; in a reasonable time; all that a man need
have。 With this; you are thrown out early into the world; where it will
be your own fault if you do not acquire all; the other accomplishments
necessary to complete and adorn your character。 You will do well to make
your compliments to Madame St。 Germain and Monsieur Pampigny; and tell
them; how sensible you are of their partiality to you; in the advantageous
testimonies which; you are informed; they have given of you here。
Adieu。 Continue to deserve such testimonies; and then you will not only
deserve; but enjoy my truest affection。
LETTER VII
LONDON; March 27; O。 S。 1747。
DEAR BOY: Pleasure is the rock which most young people split upon: they
launch out with crowded sails in quest of it; but without a compass to
direct their course; or reason sufficient to steer the vessel; for want
of which; pain and shame; instead of pleasure; are the returns of their
voyage。 Do not think that I mean to snarl at pleasure; like a Stoic;
or to preach against it; like a parson; no; I mean to point it out;
and recommend it to you; like an Epicurean: I wish you a great deal;
and my only view is to hinder you from mistaking it。
The character which most young men first aim at; is that of a man of
pleasure; but they generally take it upon trust; and instead of
consulting their own taste and inclinations; they blindly adopt whatever
those with whom they chiefly converse; are pleased to call by the name of
pleasure; and a man of pleasure in the vulgar acceptation of that phrase;
means only; a beastly drunkard; an abandoned whoremaster; and a
profligate swearer and curser。 As it may be of use to you。 I am not
unwilling; though at the same time ashamed to own; that the vices of my
youth proceeded much more from my silly resolution of being; what I heard
called a man of pleasure; than from my own inclinations。 I always
naturally hated drinking; and yet I have often drunk; with disgust at the
time; attended by great sickness the next day; only because I then
considered drinking as a necessary qualification for a fine gentleman;
and a man of pleasure。
The same as to gaming。 I did not want money; and consequently had no
occasion to play for it; but I thought play another necessary ingredient
in the composition of a man of pleasure; and accordingly I plunged into
it without desire; at first; sacrificed a thousand real pleasures to it;
and made myself solidly uneasy by it; for thirty the best years of my
life。
I was even absurd enough; for a little while; to swear; by way of
adorning and completing the shining character which I affected; but this
folly I soon laid aside; upon finding berth the guilt and the indecency
of it。
Thus seduced by fashion; and blindly adopting nominal pleasures; I lost
real ones; and my fortune impaired; and my constitution shattered; are;
I must confess; the just punishment of my errors。
Take warning then by them: choose your pleasures for yourself; and do not
let them be imposed upon you。 Follow nature and not fashion: weigh the
present enjoyment of your pleasures against the necessary consequences of
them; and then let your own common sense determine your choice。
Were I to begin the world again; with the experience which I now have of
it; I would lead a life of real; not of imaginary pleasures。 I would
enjoy the pleasures of the table; and of wine; but stop short of the
pains inseparably annexed to an excess of either。 I would not; at twenty
years; be a preaching missionary of abstemiousness and sobriety; and I
should let other people do as they would; without formally and
sententiously rebuking them for it; but I would be most firmly resolved
not to destroy my own faculties and constitution; in complaisance to
those who have no regard to their own。 I would play to give me pleasure;
but not to give me pain; that is; I would play for trifles; in mixed
companies; to amuse myself; and conform to custom; but I would take care
not to venture for sums; which; if I won; I should not be the better for;
but; if I lost; should be under a difficulty to pay: and when paid; would
oblige me to retrench in several other articles。 Not to mention the
quarrels which deep play commonly occasions。
I would pass some of my time in reading; and the rest in the company of
people of sense and learning; and chiefly those above me; and I would
frequent the mixed companies of men and women of fashion; which; though
often frivolous; yet they unbend and refresh the mind; not uselessly;
because they certainly polish and soften the manners。
These would be my pleasures and amusements; if I were to live the last
thirty years over again; they are rational ones; and; moreover; I will
tell you; they are really the fashionable ones; for the others are not;
in truth; the pleasures of what I call people of fashion; but of those
who only call themselves so。 Does good company care to have a man
reeling drunk among them? Or to see another tearing his ha