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第16章

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exercise some influence upon those about them。  The approximation

of feeling; thought; and habit is constant; and the action of

example unceasing。



Emerson has observed that even old couples; or persons who have

been housemates for a course of years; grow gradually like each

other; so that; if they were to live long enough; we should

scarcely be able to know them apart。  But if this be true of the

old; how much more true is it of the young; whose plastic natures

are so much more soft and impressionable; and ready to take the

stamp of the life and conversation of those about them!



〃There has been;〃 observed Sir Charles Bell in one of his letters;

〃a good deal said about education; but they appear to me to put

out of sight EXAMPLE; which is all…in…all。  My best education was

the example set me by my brothers。  There was; in all the members

of the family; a reliance on self; a true independence; and by

imitation I obtained it。〃 (1)



It is in the nature of things that the circumstances which

contribute to form the character; should exercise their principal

influence during the period of growth。  As years advance; example

and imitation become custom; and gradually consolidate into habit;

which is of so much potency that; almost before we know it; we

have in a measure yielded up to it our personal freedom。



It is related of Plato; that on one occasion he reproved a boy for

playing at some foolish game。  〃Thou reprovest me;〃 said the boy;


〃for a very little thing。〃  〃But custom;〃 replied Plato; 〃is not a

little thing。〃  Bad custom; consolidated into habit; is such a

tyrant that men sometimes cling to vices even while they curse

them。  They have become the slaves of habits whose power they

are impotent to resist。  Hence Locke has said that to create

and maintain that vigour of mind which is able to contest the

empire of habit; may be regarded as one of the chief ends

of moral discipline。



Though much of the education of character by example is

spontaneous and unconscious; the young need not necessarily be the

passive followers or imitators of those about them。  Their own

conduct; far more than the conduct of their companions; tends to

fix the purpose and form the principles of their life。  Each

possesses in himself a power of will and of free activity; which;

if courageously exercised; will enable him to make his own

individual selection of friends and associates。  It is only

through weakness of purpose that young people; as well as old;

become the slaves of their inclinations; or give themselves up to

a servile imitation of others。



It is a common saying that men are known by the company they keep。

The sober do not naturally associate with the drunken; the refined

with the coarse; the decent with the dissolute。  To associate with

depraved persons argues a low taste and vicious tendencies; and to

frequent their society leads to inevitable degradation of

character。  〃The conversation of such persons;〃 says Seneca; 〃is

very injurious; for even if it does no immediate harm; it leaves

its seeds in the mind; and follows us when we have gone from the

speakersa plague sure to spring up in future resurrection。〃



If young men are wisely influenced and directed; and

conscientiously exert their own free energies; they will seek the

society of those better than themselves; and strive to imitate

their example。  In companionship with the good; growing natures

will always find their best nourishment; while companionship with

the bad will only be fruitful in mischief。  There are persons whom

to know is to love; honour; and admire; and others whom to know is

to shun and despise;〃DONT LE SAVOIR N'EST QUE BETERIE;〃 as says

Rabelais when speaking of the education of Gargantua。  Live with

persons of elevated characters; and you will feel lifted and

lighted up in them: 〃Live with wolves;〃 says the Spanish proverb;

〃and you will learn to howl。〃



Intercourse with even commonplace; selfish persons; may prove most

injurious; by inducing a dry; dull reserved; and selfish condition

of mind; more or less inimical to true manliness and breadth of

character。  The mind soon learns to run in small grooves; the

heart grows narrow and contracted; and the moral nature becomes

weak; irresolute; and accommodating; which is fatal to all

generous ambition or real excellence。



On the other hand; association with persons wiser; better; and

more experienced than ourselves; is always more or less inspiring

and invigorating。  They enhance our own knowledge of life。  We

correct our estimates by theirs; and become partners in their

wisdom。  We enlarge our field of observation through their eyes;

profit by their experience; and learn not only from what they have

enjoyed; butwhich is still more instructivefrom what they

have suffered。  If they are stronger than ourselves; we become

participators in their strength。  Hence companionship with the

wise and energetic never fails to have a most valuable influence

on the formation of characterincreasing our resources;

strengthening our resolves; elevating our aims; and enabling us to

exercise greater dexterity and ability in our own affairs; as well

as more effective helpfulness of others。



〃I have often deeply regretted in myself;〃 says Mrs。

Schimmelpenninck; 〃the great loss I have experienced from the

solitude of my early habits。  We need no worse companion than our

unregenerate selves; and; by living alone; a person not only

becomes wholly ignorant of the means of helping his fellow…

creatures; but is without the perception of those wants which most

need help。  Association with others; when not on so large a scale

as to make hours of retirement impossible; may be considered as

furnishing to an individual a rich multiplied experience; and

sympathy so drawn forth; though; unlike charity; it begins abroad;

never fails to bring back rich treasures home。  Association with

others is useful also in strengthening the character; and in

enabling us; while we never lose sight of our main object; to

thread our way wisely and well。〃 (2)



An entirely new direction may be given to the life of a young man

by a happy suggestion; a timely hint; or the kindly advice of an

honest friend。  Thus the life of Henry Martyn  the Indian

missionary; seems to have been singularly influenced by a

friendship which he formed; when a boy; at Truro Grammar School。

Martyn himself was of feeble frame; and of a delicate nervous

temperament。  Wanting in animal spirits; he took but little

pleasure in school sports; and being of a somewhat petulant

temper; the bigger boys took pleasure in provoking him; and some

of them in bullying him。  One of the bigger boys; however;

conceiving a friendship for Martyn; took him under his protection;

stood between him and his persecutors; and not only fought his

battles for him; but helped him with his lessons。  Though Martyn

was rather a backward pupil; his father was desirous that he

should have the advantage of a college education; and at the age

of about fifteen he sent him to Oxford to try for a Corpus

scholarship; in which he failed。  He remained for two years more

at the Truro Grammar School; and then went to Cambridge; where he

was entered at St。 John's College。  Who should he find already

settled there as a student but his old champion of the Truro

Grammar School?  Their friendship was renewed; and the elder

student from that time forward acted as the Mentor; of the younger

one。  Martyn was fitful in his studies; excitable and petulant;

and occasionally subject to fits of almost uncontrollable rage。

His big friend; on the other hand; was a steady; patient;

hardworking fellow; and he never ceased to watch over; to guide;

and to advise for good his irritable fellow…student。  He kept

Martyn out of the way of evil company; advised him to work hard;

〃not for the praise of men; but for the glory of God;〃 and so

successfully assisted 

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