lectures16+17-第4章

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the　formula　by　which　the　'now'　keeps　exfoliating　out　of　itself；



yet　never　escapes。　　What　is　it；　indeed；　that　keeps　existence



exfoliating？　　The　formal　being　of　anything；　the　logical



definition　of　it；　is　static。　　For　mere　logic　every　question



contains　its　own　answerwe　simply　fill　the　hole　with　the　dirt　we



dug　out。　　Why　are　twice　two　four？　　Because；　in　fact；　four　is



twice　two。　　Thus　logic　finds　in　life　no　propulsion；　only　a



momentum。　　It　goes　because　it　is　a…going。　But　the　revelation



adds：　　it　goes　because　it　is　and　WAS　a…going。　　You　walk；　as　it



were；　round　yourself　in　the　revelation。　　Ordinary　philosophy　is



like　a　hound　hunting　his　own　tail。　　The　more　he　hunts　the　farther



he　has　to　go；　and　his　nose　never　catches　up　with　his　heels；



because　it　is　forever　ahead　of　them。　　So　the　present　is　already　a



foregone　conclusion；　and　I　am　ever　too　late　to　understand　it。　



But　at　the　moment　of　recovery　from　anaesthesis；　just　then；　BEFORE



STARTING　ON　LIFE；　I　catch；　so　to　speak；　a　glimpse　of　my　heels；　a



glimpse　of　the　eternal　process　just　in　the　act　of　starting。　　The



truth　is　that　we　travel　on　a　journey　that　was　accomplished　before



we　set　out；　and　the　real　end　of　philosophy　is　accomplished；　not



when　we　arrive　at；　but　when　we　remain　in；　our　destination　（being



already　there）which　may　occur　vicariously　in　this　life　when　we



cease　our　intellectual　questioning。　That　is　why　there　is　a　smile



upon　the　face　of　the　revelation；　as　we　view　it。　　It　tells　us　that



we　are　forever　half　a　second　too　late　that's　all。　　'You　could



kiss　your　own　lips；　and　have　all　the　fun　to　yourself；'　it　says；



if　you　only　knew　the　trick。　　It　would　be　perfectly　easy　if　they



would　just　stay　there　till　you　got　round　to　them。　Why　don't　you



manage　it　somehow？〃















Dialectically　minded　readers　of　this　farrago　will　at　least



recognize　the　region　of　thought　of　which　Mr。　Clark　writes；　as



familiar。　　In　his　latest　pamphlet；　〃Tennyson's　Trances　and　the



Anaesthetic　Revelation；〃　Mr。　Blood　describes　its　value　for　life



as　follows：







〃The　Anaesthetic　Revelation　is　the　Initiation　of　Man　into　the



Immemorial　Mystery　of　the　Open　Secret　of　Being；　revealed　as　the



Inevitable　Vortex　of　Continuity。　　Inevitable　is　the　word。　　Its



motive　is　inherentit　is　what　has　to　be。　　It　is　not　for　any　love



or　hate；　nor　for　joy　nor　sorrow；　nor　good　nor　ill。　　End；



beginning；　or　purpose；　it　knows　not　of。







〃It　affords　no　particular　of　the　multiplicity　and　variety　of



things　but　it　fills　appreciation　of　the　historical　and　the　sacred



with　a　secular　and　intimately　personal　illumination　of　the　nature



and　motive　of　existence；　which　then　seems　reminiscentas　if　it



should　have　appeared；　or　shall　yet　appear；　to　every　participant



thereof。







〃Although　it　is　at　first　startling　in　its　solemnity；　it　becomes



directly　such　a　matter　of　courseso　old…fashioned；　and　so　akin



to　proverbs　that　it　inspires　exultation　rather　than　fear；　and　a



sense　of　safety；　as　identified　with　the　aboriginal　and　the



universal。　　But　no　words　may　express　the　imposing　certainty　of



the　patient　that　he　is　realizing　the　primordial；　Adamic　surprise



of　Life。







〃Repetition　of　the　experience　finds　it　ever　the　same；　and　as　if



it　could　not　possibly　be　otherwise。　　The　subject　resumes　his



normal　consciousness　only　to　partially　and　fitfully　remember　its



occurrence；　and　to　try　to　formulate　its　baffling　importwith



only　this　consolatory　afterthought：　　that　he　has　known　the　oldest



truth；　and　that　he　has　done　with　human　theories　as　to　the　origin；



meaning；　or　destiny　of　the　race。　　He　is　beyond　instruction　in



'spiritual　things。'







〃The　lesson　is　one　of　central　safety：　　the　Kingdom　is　within。　



All　days　are　judgment　days：　　but　there　can　be　no　climacteric



purpose　of　eternity；　nor　any　scheme　of　the　whole。　　The　astronomer



abridges　the　row　of　bewildering　figures　by　increasing　his　unit　of



measurement：　so　may　we　reduce　the　distracting　multiplicity　of



things　to　the　unity　for　which　each　of　us　stands。







〃This　has　been　my　moral　sustenance　since　I　have　known　of　it。　　In



my　first　printed　mention　of　it　I　declared：　　'The　world　is　no　more



the　alien　terror　that　was　taught　me。　　Spurning　the　cloud…grimed



and　still　sultry　battlements　whence　so　lately　Jehovan　thunders



boomed；　my　gray　gull　lifts　her　wing　against　the　nightfall；　and



takes　the　dim　leagues　with　a　fearless　eye。'　And　now；　after



twenty…seven　years　of　this　experience；　the　wing　is　grayer；　but



the　eye　is　fearless　still；　while　I　renew　and　doubly　emphasize



that　declaration。　　I　knowas　having　knownthe　meaning　of



Existence：　　the　sane　centre　of　the　universe　at　once　the　wonder



and　the　assurance　of　the　soulfor　which　the　speech　of　reason　has



as　yet　no　name　but　the　Anaesthetic　Revelation。〃　I　have



considerably　abridged　the　quotation。







This　has　the　genuine　religious　mystic　ring！　I　just　now　quoted　J。



A。　Symonds。　　He　also　records　a　mystical　experience　with



chloroform；　as　follows：







'After　the　choking　and　stifling　had　passed　away；　I　seemed　at



first　in　a　state　of　utter　blankness；　then　came　flashes　of　intense



light；　alternating　with　blackness；　and　with　a　keen　vision　of　what



was　going　on　in　the　room　around　me；　but　no　sensation　of　touch。　I



thought　that　I　was　near　death；　when；　suddenly；　my　soul　became



aware　of　God；　who　was　manifestly　dealing　with　me；　handling　me；　so



to　speak；　in　an　intense　personal　present　reality。　　I　felt　him



streaming　in　like　light　upon　me。　。　。　。　　I　cannot　describe　the



ecstasy　I　felt。　　Then；　as　I　gradually　awoke　from　the　influence　of



the　anaesthetics；　the　old　sense　of　my　relation　to　the　world　began



to　return；　the　new　sense　of　my　relation　to　God　began　to　fade。　　I



suddenly　leapt　to　my　feet　on　the　chair　where　I　was　sitting；　and



shrieked　out；　'It　is　too　horrible；　it　is　too　horrible；　it　is　too



horrible；'　meaning　that　I　could　not　bear　this　disillusionment。



Then　I　flung　myself　on　the　ground；　and　at　last　awoke　covered　with



blood；　calling　to　the　two　surgeons　（who　were　frightened）；　'Why



did　you　not　kill　me？　　Why　would　you　not　let　me　die？'　Only　think



of　it。　　To　have　felt　for　that　long　dateless　ecstasy　of　vision　the



very　God；　in　all　purity　and　tenderness　and　truth　and　absolute



love；　and　then　to　find　that　I　had　after　all　had　no　revelation；



but　that　I　had　been　tricked　by　the　abnormal　excitement　of　my



brain。







〃Yet；　this　question　remains；　Is　it　possible　that　the　inner　sense



of　reality　which　succeeded；　when　my　flesh　was　dead　to　impressions



from　without；　to　the　ordinary　sense　of　physical　relations；　was



not　a　delusion　but　an　actual　experience？　　Is　it　possible　that　I；



in　that　moment；　felt　what　some　of　the　saints　have　said　they



always　felt；　the　undemonstrable　but　irrefragable　certainty　of



God？〃＇235＇







＇235＇　Op。　cit。；　pp。　78…80；　abridged。　　I　subjoin；　also　abridging



it；　another　interesting　anaesthetic　revelation　communicated　to　me



in　manuscript　by　a　friend　in　England。　　The　subject；　a　gifted



woman；　was　taking　ether　for　a　surgical　operation。







〃I　wondered　if　I　was　in　a　prison　being　tortured；　and　why　I



remembered　having　heard　it　said　that　people　'learn　through



suffering；'　and　in　view　of　what　I　was　seeing；　the　inadequacy　of



this　saying　struck　me　so　much　that　I　said；　aloud；　'to　suffer　IS



to　learn。'







〃With　that　I　became　unconscious　again；　and　my　last　dream



immediately　preceded　my　real　coming　to。　　It　only　lasted　a　few



seconds；　and　was　most　vivid　and　real　to　me；　though　it　may　not　be



clear　in　words。







〃A　great　Being　or　Power　was　traveling　through　t