part 6-第18章

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Boston；　who　goes　about　in　the　spring　feeding　catnip　to



street　cats。　　You　dispense　it　to　a　lot　of　fellows。　　Your　pull



seems　to　be　more　with　men　than　with　women；　you　know；



with　seasoned　men；　about　my　age；　or　older。　　Even　on　Fri…



day　afternoon　I　kept　running　into　them；　old　boys　I　hadn't



seen　for　years；　thin　at　the　part　and　thick　at　the　girth；　until



I　stood　still　in　the　draft　and　held　my　hair　on。　　They're　al…



ways　there；　I　hear　them　talking　about　you　in　the　smoking…















room。　　Probably　we　don't　get　to　the　point　of　apprehending



anything　good　until　we're　about　forty。　　Then；　in　the　light



of　what　is　going；　and　of　what；　God　help　us！　is　coming；　we



arrive　at　understanding。〃







　　　　　〃I　don't　see　why　people　go　to　the　opera；　anyway；seri…



ous　people。〃　　She　spoke　discontentedly。　　〃I　suppose　they



get　something；　or　think　they　do。　　Here's　the　coffee。　　There；



please；〃　she　directed　the　waiter。　　Going　to　the　table　she　be…



gan　to　pour　the　coffee；　standing。　　She　wore　a　white　dress



trimmed　with　crystals　which　had　rattled　a　good　deal　dur…



ing　dinner；　as　all　her　movements　had　been　impatient　and



nervous；　and　she　had　twisted　the　dark　velvet　rose　at　her



girdle　until　it　looked　rumpled　and　weary。　　She　poured　the



coffee　as　if　it　were　a　ceremony　in　which　she　did　not　believe。



〃Can　you　make　anything　of　Fred's　nonsense；　Dr。　Archie？〃



she　asked；　as　he　came　to　take　his　cup。







　　　　　Fred　approached　her。　　〃My　nonsense　is　all　right。　　The



same　brand　has　gone　with　you　before。　　It's　you　who　won't



be　jollied。　　What's　the　matter？　　You　have　something　on



your　mind。〃







　　　　　〃I've　a　good　deal。　　Too　much　to　be　an　agreeable　hos…



tess。〃　　She　turned　quickly　away　from　the　coffee　and　sat



down　on　the　piano　bench；　facing　the　two　men。　　〃For　one



thing；　there's　a　change　in　the　cast　for　Friday　afternoon。



They're　going　to　let　me　sing　SIEGLINDE。〃　　Her　frown　did　not



conceal　the　pleasure　with　which　she　made　this　announce…



ment。







　　　　　〃Are　you　going　to　keep　us　dangling　about　here　forever；



Thea？　　Archie　and　I　are　supposed　to　have　other　things　to



do。〃　　Fred　looked　at　her　with　an　excitement　quite　as　ap…



parent　as　her　own。







　　　　　〃Here　I've　been　ready　to　sing　SIEGLINDE　for　two　years；



kept　in　torment；　and　now　it　comes　off　within　two　weeks；



just　when　I　want　to　be　seeing　something　of　Dr。　Archie。　　I



don't　know　what　their　plans　are　down　there。　　After　Friday



they　may　let　me　cool　for　several　weeks；　and　they　may　rush















me。　　I　suppose　it　depends　somewhat　on　how　things　go　Fri…



day　afternoon。〃







　　　　　〃Oh；　they'll　go　fast　enough！　　That's　better　suited　to



your　voice　than　anything　you've　sung　here。　　That　gives



you　every　opportunity　I've　waited　for。〃　　Ottenburg



crossed　the　room　and　standing　beside　her　began　to　play



〃DU　BIST　DER　LENZ。〃







　　　　　With　a　violent　movement　Thea　caught　his　wrists　and



pushed　his　hands　away　from　the　keys。







　　　　　〃Fred；　can't　you　be　serious？　　A　thousand　things　may



happen　between　this　and　Friday　to　put　me　out。　　Some…



thing　will　happen。　　If　that　part　were　sung　well；　as　well　as



it　ought　to　be；　it　would　be　one　of　the　most　beautiful　things



in　the　world。　　That's　why　it　never　is　sung　right；　and　never



will　be。〃　　She　clenched　her　hands　and　opened　them　de…



spairingly；　looking　out　of　the　open　window。　　〃It's　inac…



cessibly　beautiful！〃　she　brought　out　sharply。







　　　　　Fred　and　Dr。　Archie　watched　her。　　In　a　moment　she



turned　back　to　them。　　〃It's　impossible　to　sing　a　part　like



that　well　for　the　first　time；　except　for　the　sort　who　will



never　sing　it　any　better。　　Everything　hangs　on　that　first



night；　and　that's　bound　to　be　bad。　　There　you　are；〃　she



shrugged　impatiently。　　〃For　one　thing；　they　change　the



cast　at　the　eleventh　hour　and　then　rehearse　the　life　out　of



me。〃







　　　　　Ottenburg　put　down　his　cup　with　exaggerated　care。



〃Still；　you　really　want　to　do　it；　you　know。〃







　　　　　〃Want　to？〃　she　repeated　indignantly；　〃of　course　I　want



to！　　If　this　were　only　next　Thursday　night　　But　between



now　and　Friday　I'll　do　nothing　but　fret　away　my　strength。



Oh；　I'm　not　saying　I　don't　need　the　rehearsals！　　But　I



don't　need　them　strung　out　through　a　week。　　That　sys…



tem's　well　enough　for　phlegmatic　singers；　it　only　drains



me。　　Every　single　feature　of　operatic　routine　is　detri…



mental　to　me。　　I　usually　go　on　like　a　horse　that's　been



fixed　to　lose　a　race。　　I　have　to　work　hard　to　do　my　worst；















let　alone　my　best。　　I　wish　you　could　hear　me　sing　well；



once；〃　she　turned　to　Fred　defiantly；　〃I　have；　a　few　times



in　my　life；　when　there　was　nothing　to　gain　by　it。〃







　　　　　Fred　approached　her　again　and　held　out　his　hand。　　〃I



recall　my　instructions；　and　now　I'll　leave　you　to　fight　it　out



with　Archie。　　He　can't　possibly　represent　managerial　stu…



pidity　to　you　as　I　seem　to　have　a　gift　for　doing。〃







　　　　　As　he　smiled　down　at　her；　his　good　humor；　his　good



wishes；　his　understanding；　embarrassed　her　and　recalled



her　to　herself。　　She　kept　her　seat；　still　holding　his　hand。



〃All　the　same；　Fred；　isn't　it　too　bad；　that　there　are　so



many　things〃　　She　broke　off　with　a　shake　of　the　head。







　　　　　〃My　dear　girl；　if　I　could　bridge　over　the　agony　between



now　and　Friday　for　you　　But　you　know　the　rules　of　the



game；　why　torment　yourself？　　You　saw　the　other　night



that　you　had　the　part　under　your　thumb。　　Now　walk；　sleep；



play　with　Archie；　keep　your　tiger　hungry；　and　she'll　spring



all　right　on　Friday。　　I'll　be　there　to　see　her；　and　there'll　be



more　than　I；　I　suspect。　　Harsanyi's　on　the　Wilhelm　der



Grosse；　gets　in　on　Thursday。〃







　　　　　〃Harsanyi？〃　　Thea's　eye　lighted。　　〃I　haven't　seen　him



for　years。　　We　always　miss　each　other。〃　　She　paused；　hesi…



tating。　　〃Yes；　I　should　like　that。　　But　he'll　be　busy；　may…



be？〃







　　　　　〃He　gives　his　first　concert　at　Carnegie　Hall；　week　after



next。　　Better　send　him　a　box　if　you　can。〃







　　　　　〃Yes；　I'll　manage　it。〃　　Thea　took　his　hand　again。　　〃Oh；



I　should　like　that；　Fred！〃　she　added　impulsively。　　〃Even



if　I　were　put　out；　he'd　get　the　idea；〃she　threw　back



her　head；〃for　there　is　an　idea！〃







　　　　　〃Which　won't　penetrate　here；〃　he　tapped　his　brow　and



began　to　laugh。　　〃You　are　an　ungrateful　huzzy；　COMME　LES



AUTRES！〃







　　　　　Thea　detained　him　as　he　turned　away。　　She　pulled　a



flower　out　of　a　bouquet　on　the　piano　and　absently　drew



the　stem　through　the　lapel　of　his　coat。　　〃I　shall　be　walking















in　the　Park　to…morrow　afternoon；　on　the　reservoir　path；



between　four　and　five；　if　you　care　to　join　me。　　You　know



that　after　Harsanyi　I'd　rather　please　you　than　anyone　else。



You　know　a　lot；　but　he　knows　even　more　than　you。〃







　　　　　〃Thank　you。　　Don't　try　to　analyze　it。　　SCHLAFEN　SIE



WOHL！〃　he　kissed　her　fingers　and　waved　from　the　door；



closing　it　behind　him。







　　　　　〃He's　the　right　sort；　Thea。〃　　Dr。　Archie　looked　warmly



after　his　disappearing　friend。　　〃I've　always　hoped　you'd



make　it　up　with　Fred。〃







　　　　　〃Well；　haven't　I？　　Oh；　marry　him；　you　mean！　　Perhaps



it　may　come　about；　some　day。　　Just　at　present　he's　not



in　the　marriage　market　any　more　than　I　am；　is　he？〃







　　　　　〃No；　I　suppose　not。　　It's　a　damned　shame　that　a　man



like　Ottenburg　should　be　tied　up　as　he　is；　wasting　all　the



best　years　of　his　life。　　A　woman　with　general　paresis　ought



to　be　legally　dead。〃







　　　　　〃Don't　let　us　talk　about　Fred's　wife；　p