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第19章

camille (la dame aux camilias)(卡米勒)-第19章

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                         CAMILLE (LA DAME AUX CAMILIAS) 



     〃You won't be cross?〃 

     〃What right have I to be cross?〃 

     〃Well; there was a sufficient reason why I went in alone。〃 

     〃What?〃 

     〃Some one was waiting for me here。〃 

     If she had thrust a knife into me she would not have hurt me more。 I 

rose; and holding out my hand; 〃Goodbye;〃 said I。 

     〃I knew you would be cross;〃 she said; 〃men are frantic to know what 

is certain to give them pain。〃 

     〃But    I  assure   you;〃   I  added    coldly;  as  if  wishing    to  prove    how 

completely I was cured of my passion; 〃I assure you that I am not cross。 It 

was   quite   natural   that   some   one   should   be   waiting   for   you;   just   as   it   is 

quite natural that I should go from here at three in the morning。〃 

     〃Have you; too; some one waiting for you?〃 

     〃No; but I must go。〃 

     〃Good…bye; then。〃 

     〃You send me away?〃 

     〃Not the least in the world。〃 

     〃Why are you so unkind to me?〃 

     〃How have I been unkind to you?〃 

     〃In telling me that some one was waiting for you。〃 

     〃I could not help laughing at the idea that you had been so happy to 

see me come in alone when there was such a good reason for it。〃 

     〃One   finds   pleasure   in   childish   enough   things;   and   it   is   too   bad   to 

destroy such a pleasure when; by simply leaving it alone; one can make 

somebody so happy。〃 

     〃But what do you think I am? I am neither maid nor duchess。 I didn't 

know   you   till   to…day;   and   I   am   not   responsible   to   you   for   my   actions。 

Supposing one day I should become your mistress; you are bound to know 

that I have had other lovers besides you。 If you make scenes of jealousy 

like this before; what will it be after; if that after should ever exist? I never 

met any one like you。〃 

     〃That is because no one has ever loved you as I love you。〃 

     〃Frankly; then; you really love me?〃 



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                          CAMILLE (LA DAME AUX CAMILIAS) 



     〃As much as it is possible to love; I think。〃 

     〃And that has lasted since?〃 

     〃Since the day I saw you go into Susse's; three years ago。 

     〃Do   you   know;   that   is   tremendously   fine?   Well;   what   am   to   do   in 

return?〃 

     〃Love me a little;〃 I said; my heart beating so that I could hardly speak; 

for; in spite of the half…mocking smiles with which she had accompanied 

the   whole   conversation;   it   seemed   to   me   that   Marguerite   began   to   share 

my agitation; and that the hour so long awaited was drawing near。 

     〃Well; but the duke?〃 

     〃What duke?〃 

     〃My jealous old duke。〃 

     〃He will know nothing。〃 

     〃And if he should?〃 

     〃He would forgive you。〃 

     〃Ah; no; he would leave me; and what would become of me?〃 

     〃You risk that for some one else。〃 

     〃How do you know?〃 〃By the order you gave not to admit any one to… 

night。〃 〃It is true; but that is a serious friend。〃 

     〃For whom you care nothing; as you have shut your door against him 

at such an hour。〃 

     〃It is not for you to reproach me; since it was in order to receive you; 

you and your friend。〃 

     Little by  little   I   had   drawn   nearer   to   Marguerite。   I   had put   my  arms 

about her waist; and I felt her supple body weigh lightly on my clasped 

hands。 

     〃If   you   knew   how   much   I   love   you!〃   I   said   in   a   low   voice。   〃Really 

true?〃 

     〃I swear it。〃 

     〃Well; if you will promise to do everything I tell you; without a word; 

without an opinion; without a question; perhaps I will say yes。〃 

     〃I will do everything that you wish!〃 

     〃But I forewarn you I must be free to do as I please; without giving 

you the slightest details what I do。 I have long wished for a young lover; 



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                          CAMILLE (LA DAME AUX CAMILIAS) 



who   should   be   young   and   not   self…willed;   loving   without   distrust;   loved 

without claiming the right to it。 I have never found one。 Men; instead of 

being   satisfied   in   obtaining   for   a   long time   what   they  scarcely  hoped   to 

obtain once; exact from their mistresses a full account of the present; the 

past; and even the future。 As they get accustomed to her; they want to rule 

her;   and   the   more   one   gives   them   the   more   exacting   they   become。   If   I 

decide now on taking a new lover; he must have three very rare qualities: 

he must be confiding; submissive; and discreet。〃 

     〃Well; I will be all that you wish。〃 

     〃We shall see。〃 

     〃When shall we see?〃 

     〃Later on。〃 

     〃Why?〃 

     〃Because;〃      said  Marguerite;     releasing    herself   from   my    arms;   and; 

taking from a great bunch of red camellias a single camellia; she placed it 

in my buttonhole; 〃because one can not always carry out agreements the 

day they are signed。〃 

     〃And when shall I see you again?〃 I said; clasping her in my arms。 

     〃When this camellia changes colour。〃 

     〃When will it change colour?〃 

     〃To…morrow night between eleven and twelve。 Are you satisfied?〃 

     〃Need you ask me?〃 

     〃Not a word of this either to your friend or to Prudence; or to anybody 

whatever。〃 

     〃I promise。〃 

     〃Now; kiss me; and we will go back to the dining…room。〃 

     She held up her lips to me; smoothed her hair again; and we went out 

of the room; she singing; and I almost beside myself。 

     In the next room she stopped for a moment and said to me in a low 

voice: 

     〃It must seem strange to you that I am ready to take you at a moment's 

notice。   Shall   I   tell   you   why?   It   is;〃   she   continued;   taking   my   hand   and 

placing it against her heart so that I could feel how rapidly and violently it 

palpitated;   〃it   is   because   I   shall   not   live   as   long   as   others;   and   I   have 



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                      CAMILLE (LA DAME AUX CAMILIAS) 



promised myself to live more quickly。〃 

    〃Don't speak to me like that; I entreat you。〃 

    〃Oh; make yourself easy;〃 she continued; laughing; 〃however short a 

time I have to live; I shall live longer than you will love me!〃 

    And she went singing into the dining…room。 

    〃Where is Nanine?〃 she said; seeing Gaston and Prudence alone。 

    〃She is asleep in your room; waiting till you are ready to go to bed;〃 

replied Prudence。 

    〃Poor thing; I am killing her! And now gentlemen; it is time to go。〃 

    Ten minutes after; Gaston and I left the house。 Marguerite shook hands 

with me and said good…bye。 Prudence remained behind。 

    〃Well;〃 said Gaston; when we were in the street; 〃what do you think of 

Marguerite?〃 

    〃She is an angel; and I am madly in love with her。〃 〃So I guessed; did 

you tell her so?〃 

    〃Yes。〃 

    〃And did she promise to believe you?〃 

    〃No。〃 

    〃She is not like Prudence。〃 

    〃Did she promise to?〃 

    〃Better still; my dear fellow。 You wouldn't think it; but she is still not 

half bad; poor old Duvernoy!〃 



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                         CAMILLE (LA DAME AUX CAMILIAS) 



                              CHAPTER 11 



     At this point Armand stopped。 

     〃Would   you   close   the   window   for   me?〃   he   said。   〃I   am  beginning   to 

feel cold。 Meanwhile; I will get into bed。〃 

     I closed the   window。 Armand; who   was still very  weak; took off   his 

dressing…gown and lay down in bed; resting his head for a few moments 

on   the   pillow;   like   a   man   who   is   tired   by   much   talking   or   disturbed   by 

painf

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