4 breaking dawn破晓-第80章
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compassion and Esme's devotion。 I would probably never be able to do anything interesting or special
like Edward； Alice； and Jasper could do。 Maybe I would just love Edward more than anyone in the
history of the world had ever loved anyone else。
I could live with that。
I remembered parts of this—twisting my fingers in his hair； tracing the planes of his chest—but other
parts were so new。 He was new。 It was an entirely different experience with Edward kissing me so
fearlessly； so forcefully。 I responded to his intensity； and then suddenly we were falling。
〃Oops；〃 I said； and he laughed underneath me。 〃I didn't mean to tackle you like that。 Are you okay？〃
He stroked my face。 〃Slightly better than okay〃 And then a perplexed expression crossed his face。
〃Renesmee？〃 he asked uncertainly； trying to ascertain what I wanted most in this moment。 A very difficult
question to answer； because I wanted so many things at the same time。
I could tell that he wasn't exactly averse to procrastinating our return trip； and it was hard to think about
much besides his skin on mine—there really wasn't that much left of the dress。 But my memory of
Renesmee； before and after her birth； was becoming more and more dreamlike to me。 More unlikely。 All
my memories of her were human memories； an aura of artificiality clung to them。 Nothing seemed real
that I hadn't seen with these eyes； touched with these hands。
Every minute； the reality of that little stranger slipped further away。
〃Renesmee；〃 I agreed； rueful； and I whipped back up onto my feet； pulling him with me。
22。 PROMISED
Thinking of Renesmee brought her to that center…stage place in my strange； new； and roomy but
distractible mind。 So many questions。
〃Tell me about her；〃 i insisted as he took my hand。 Being linked barely slowed us。
〃She's like nothing else in the world；〃 he told me； and the sound of an almost religious devotion was there
again in his voice。
I felt a sharp pang of jealousy over this stranger。 He knew her and I did not。 It wasn't fair。
〃How much is she like you？ How much like me？ Or like I was； anyway。〃
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〃It seems a fairly even divide。〃
〃She was warm…blooded；〃 I remembered。
〃Yes。 She has a heartbeat； though it runs a little bit faster than a human's。 Her temperature is a little bit
hotter than usual； too。 She sleeps。〃
〃Really？〃
〃Quite well for a newborn。 The only parents in the world who don't need sleep； and our child already
sleeps through the night。〃 He chuckled。
I liked the way he said our child。 The words made her more real。
〃She has exactly your color eyes—so that didn't get lost； after all。〃 He smiled at me。 〃They're so
beautiful。〃
〃And the vampire parts？〃 I asked。
〃Her skin seems about as impenetrable as ours。 Not that anyone would dream of testing that。〃
I blinked at him； a little shocked。
〃Of course no one would；〃 he assured me again。 〃Her diet。。。 well； she prefers to drink blood。 Carlisle
continues to try to persuade her to drink some baby formula； too； but she doesn't have much patience
with it。 Can't say that I
blame her—nasty…smelling stuff； even for human food。〃
I gaped openly at him now。 He made it sound like they were having conversations。 〃Persuade her？〃
〃She's intelligent； shockingly so； and progressing at an immense pace。 Though she doesn't speak
—yet—she communicates quite effectively。〃
〃Doesn't。 Speak。 Yet〃
He slowed our pace further； letting me absorb this。
〃What do you mean； she communicates effectively？〃 I demanded。
〃I think it will be easier for you to。。。 see for yourself。 It's rather difficult to describe。〃
I considered that。 I knew there was a lot that I needed to see for myself before it would be real。 I wasn't
sure how much more I was ready for； so I changed the subject。
〃Why is Jacob still here？〃 I asked。 〃How can he stand it？ Why should he？〃 My ringing voice trembled a
little。 〃Why should he have to suffer more？〃
〃Jacob isn't suffering；〃 he said in a strange new tone。 〃Though I might be willing to change his condition；〃
Edward added through his teeth。
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〃Edward！〃 I hissed； yanking him to a stop （and feeling a little thrill of smugness that I was able to do it）。
〃How can you say that？ Jacob has given up everything to protect us！ What I've put him through—！〃 I
cringed at the dim memory of shame and guilt。 It seemed odd now that I had needed him so much then。
That sense of absence without him near had vanished； it must have been a human weakness。
〃You'll see exactly how I can say that；〃 Edward muttered。 〃I promised him that I would let him explain；
but I doubt you'll see it much differently than I do。 Of course； I'm often wrong about your thoughts； aren't
I？〃 He pursed his lips and eyed me。
〃Explain what？〃
Edward shook his head。 〃I promised。 Though I don't know if I really owe him anything at all anymore。 。 。
。〃 His teeth ground together。
〃Edward； I don't understand。〃 Frustration and indignation took over my head。
He stroked my cheek and then smiled gently when my face smoothed out in response； desire
momentarily overruling annoyance。 〃It's harder than you make it look； I know。 I remember。〃
〃I don't like feeling confused。〃
〃I know。 And so let's get you home； so that you can see it all for yourself。〃 His eyes ran over the remains
of my dress as he spoke of going home； and he frowned。 〃Hmm。〃 After a half second of thought； he
unbuttoned his white shirt and held it out for me to put my arms through。
〃That bad？〃
He grinned。
I slipped my arms into his sleeves and then buttoned it swiftly over my ragged bodice。 Of course； that
left him without a shirt； and it was impossible not to find that distracting。
'Til race you；〃 I said； and then cautioned； 〃no throwing the game this time！〃
He dropped my hand and grinned。 〃On your mark 。。。〃
Finding my way to my new home was simpler than walking down Charlie's street to my old one。 Our
scent left a clear and easy trail to follow； even running as fast as I could。
Edward had me beat till we hit the river。 I took a chance and made my leap early； trying to use my extra
strength to win。
〃Ha！〃 I exulted when I heard my feet touch the grass first。
Listening for his landing； I heard something I did not expect。 Something loud and much too close。 A
thudding heart。
Edward was beside me in the same second； his hands clamped down hard on the tops of my arms。
〃Don't breathe；〃 he cautioned me urgently。
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I tried not to panic as I froze mid…breath。 My eyes were the only things that moved； wheeling instinctively
to find the source of the sound。
Jacob stood at the line where the forest touched the Cullens' lawn； his arms folded across his body； his
jaw clenched tight。 Invisible in the woods behind him； I heard now two larger hearts； and the faint crush
of bracken under huge； pacing paws。
〃Carefully； Jacob；〃 Edward said。 A snarl from the forest echoed the concern in his voice。 〃Maybe this
isn't the best way—〃
〃You think it would be better to let her near the baby first？〃 Jacob interrupted。 〃It's safer to see how
Bella does with me。 I heal fast。〃
This was a test？ To see if I could not kill Jacob before I tried to not kill Renesmee？ I felt sick in the
strangest way—it had nothing to do with my stomach； only my mind。 Was this Edward's idea？
I glanced at his face anxiously； Edward seemed to deliberate for a moment； and then his expression
twisted from concern into something else。 He shrugged； and there was
