4 breaking dawn破晓-第17章
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him—unconditionally and irrevocably and； to be honest； irrationally—I'd never be able to get up off this
floor。
But it was Edward out there； so I whispered the words 〃Don't be a coward〃 under my breath and
scrambled to my feet。 I hitched the towel tighter under my arms and marched determinedly from the
bathroom。 Past the suitcase full of lace and the big bed without looking at either。 Out the open glass door
onto the powder…fine sand。
Everything was black…and…white； leached colorless by the moon。 I walked slowly across the warm
powder； pausing beside the curved tree where he had left his clothes。 I laid my hand against the rough
bark and checked my breathing to make sure it was even。 Or even enough。
I looked across the low ripples； black in the darkness； searching for him。
He wasn't hard to find。 He stood； his back to me； waist deep in the midnight water； staring up at the oval
moon。 The pallid light of the moon turned his skin a perfect white； like the sand； like the moon itself； and
made his wet hair black as the ocean。 He was motionless； his hands resting palms down against the
water； the low waves broke around him as if he were a stone。 I stared at the smooth lines of his back； his
shoulders； his arms； his neck； theflawless shape of him。。。。
The fire was no longer a flash burn across my skin—it was slow and deep now； it smoldered away all
my awkwardness； my shy uncertainty。 I slipped the towel off without hesitation； leaving it on the tree with
his clothes； and walked out into the white light； it made me pale as the snowy sand； too。
I couldn't hear the sound of my footsteps as I walked to the water's edge； but I guessed that he could。
Edward did not turn。 I let the gentle swells break over my toes； and found that he'd been right about the
temperature—it was very warm； like bath water。 I stepped in； walking carefully across the invisible ocean
floor； but my care was unnecessary； the sand continued perfectly smooth； sloping gently toward Edward。
I waded through the weightless
current till I was at his side； and then I placed my hand lightly over his cool hand lying on the water。
〃Beautiful；〃 I said； looking up at the moon； too。
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〃It's all right；〃 he answered； unimpressed。 He turned slowly to face me； little waves rolled away from his
movement and broke against my skin。 His eyes looked silver in his ice…colored face。 He twisted his hand
up so that he could twine our fingers beneath the surface of the water。 It was warm enough that his cool
skin did not raise goose bumps on mine。
〃But I wouldn't use the word beautiful〃 he continued。 〃Not with you standing here in comparison。〃
I half…smiled； then raised my free hand—it didn't tremble now—and placed it over his heart。 White on
white； we matched； for once。 He shuddered the tiniest bit at my warm touch。 His breath came rougher
now。
〃I promised we would try〃 he whispered； suddenly tense。 〃If。。。 if I do something wrong； if I hurt you；
you must tell me at once。〃
I nodded solemnly； keeping my eyes on his。 I took another step through the waves and leaned my head
against his chest。
〃Don't be afraid；〃 I murmured。 〃We belong together。〃
I was abruptly overwhelmed by the truth of my own words。 This moment was so perfect； so right； there
was no way to doubt it。
His arms wrapped around me； holding me against him； summer and winter。 It felt like every nerve ending
in my body was a live wire。
〃Forever；〃 he agreed； and then pulled us gently into deeper water。
The sun； hot on the bare skin of my back； woke me in the morning。 Late morning； maybe afternoon； I
wasn't sure。 Everything besides the time was clear； though； I knew exactly where I was—the bright room
with the big white bed； brilliant sunlight streaming through the open doors。 The clouds of netting would
soften the shine。
I didn't open my eyes。 I was too happy to change anything； no matter how small。 The only sounds were
the waves outside； our breathing； my heartbeat。。。
I was comfortable； even with the baking sun。 His cool skin was the perfect antidote to the heat。 Lying
across his wintry chest； his arms wound around me； felt very easy and natural。 I wondered idly what I'd
been so panicky about last night。 My fears all seemed silly now。
His fingers softly trailed down the contours of my spine； and I knew that he knew I was awake。 I kept
my eyes shut and tightened my arms around his neck； holding myself closer to him。
He didn't speak； his fingers moved up and down my back； barely touching it as he lightly traced patterns
on my skin。
I would have been happy to lie here forever； to never disturb this moment； but my body had other ideas。
I laughed at my impatient stomach。 It seemed sort of prosaic to be hungry after all that had passed last
night。 Like
being brought back down to earth from some great height。
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〃What's funny？〃 he murmured； still stroking my back。 The sound of his voice； serious and husky； brought
with it a deluge of memories from the night； and I felt a blush color my face and neck。
To answer his question； my stomach growled。 I laughed again。 〃You just can't escape being human for
very long。〃
I waited； but he did not laugh with me。 Slowly； sinking through the many layers of bliss that clouded my
head； came the realization of a different atmosphere outside my own glowing sphere of happiness。
I opened my eyes； the first thing I saw was the pale； almost silvery skin of his throat； the arc of his chin
above my face。 His jaw was taut。 I propped myself up on my elbow so I could see his face。
He was staring at the frothy canopy above us； and he didn't look at me as I studied his grave features。
His expression was a shock—it sent a physical jolt through my body。
〃Edward；〃 I said； a strange little catch in my throat； 〃what is it？ What's wrong？〃
〃You have to ask？〃 His voice was hard； cynical。
My first instinct； the product of a lifetime of insecurities； was to wonder what I had done wrong。 I
thought through everything that had happened； but I couldn't find any sour note in the memory。 It had all
been simpler than I'd expected； we'd fit together like corresponding pieces； made to match up。 This had
given me a secret satisfaction—we were compatible physically； as well as all the other ways。 Fire and
ice； somehow existing together without destroying each other。 More proof that I belonged with him。
I couldn't think of any part that would make him look like this—so severe and cold。 What had I missed？
His finger smoothed the worried lines on my forehead。
〃What are you thinking？〃 he whispered。
〃You're upset。 I don't understand。 Did I。。。 ？〃 I couldn't finish。
His eyes tightened。 〃How badly are you hurt； Bella？ The truth—don't try to downplay it。〃
〃Hurt？〃 I repeated； my voice came out higher than usual because the word took me so by surprise。
He raised one eyebrow； his lips a tight line。
I made a quick assessment； stretching my body automatically； tensing and flexing my muscles。 There was
stiffness； and a lot of soreness； too； it was true； but mostly there was the odd sensation that my bones all
had become unhinged at the joints； and I had changed halfway into the consistency of a jellyfish。 It was
not an unpleasant feeling。
And then I was a little angry； because he was darkening this most perfect of all mornings with his
pessimistic assumptions。
〃Why would you jump to that conclusion？ I've never been better than I am now。〃
His eyes closed。 〃Stop that。〃
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〃Stop
