father and son-第44章
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t； with the great wall of laurels whispering around me； and I burst into tears。 There was something； surely； quaint and pathetic in the figure of a little Plymouth Brother sitting in that advanced year of grace； weeping bitterly for indignities done to Hermes and to Aphrodite。 Then I opened my book for consolation； and I read a great block of pompous verse out of 'The Deity'； in the midst of which exercise； yielding to the softness of the hot and aromatic air； I fell fast asleep。
Among those who applauded the zeal of Susan Flood's parasol； the Pagets were prominent。 These were a retired Baptist minister and his wife； from Exmouth； who had lately settled amongst us； and joined in the breaking of bread。 Mr。 Paget was a fat old man； whose round pale face was clean…shaven； and who carried a full crop of loose white hair above it； his large lips were always moving； whether he spoke or not。 He resembled； as I now perceive； the portraits of S。 T。 Coleridge in age； but with all the intellect left out of them。 He lived in a sort of trance of solemn religious despondency。 He had thrown up his cure of souls； because he became convinced that be had committed the Sin against the Holy Ghost。 His wife was younger than he； very small； very tight； very active； with black eyes like pin…pricks at the base of an extremely high and narrow forehead； bordered with glossy ringlets。 He was very cross to her； and it was murmured that 'dear Mrs。 Paget had often had to pass through the waters of affliction'。 They were very poor； but rigidly genteel； and she was careful； so far as she could； to conceal from the world the caprices of her poor lunatic husband。
In our circle； it was never for a moment admitted that Mr。 Paget was a lunatic。 It was said that he had gravely sinned； and was under the Lord's displeasure； prayers were abundantly offered up that he might be led back into the pathway of light； and that the Smiling Face might be drawn forth for him from behind the Frowning Providence。 When the man had an epileptic seizure in the High Street； he was not taken to a hospital； but we repeated to one another； with shaken heads； that Satan； that crooked Serpent； had been unloosed for a season。 Mr。 Paget was fond of talking； in private and in public； of his dreadful spiritual condition and he would drop his voice while he spoke of having committed the Unpardonable Sin； with a sort of shuddering exultation； such as people sometimes feel in the possession of a very unusual disease。
It might be thought that the position held in any community by persons so afflicted and eccentric as the Pagets would be very precarious。 But it was not so with us； on the contrary； they took a prominent place at once。 Mr。 Paget； in spite of his spiritual bankruptcy； was only too anxious to help my Father in his ministrations； and used to beg to be allowed to pray and exhort。 In the latter case he took the tone of a wounded veteran； who； though fallen on the bloody field himself； could still encourage younger warriors to march forward to victory。 Everybody longed to know what the exact nature had been of that sin against the Holy Ghost which had deprived Mr。 Paget of every glimmer of hope for time or for eternity。 It was whispered that even my Father himself was not precisely acquainted with the character of it。
This mysterious disability clothed Mr Paget for us with a kind of romance。 We watched him as the women watched Dante in Verona； whispering：
Behold him how Hell's reek Has crisped his hair and singed his cheek！
His person lacked； it is true； something of the dignity of Dante's； for it was his caprice to walk up and down the High Street at noonday with one of those cascades of coloured paper which were known as 'ornaments for your fireplace' slung over the back and another over the front of his body。 These he manufactured for sale； and he adopted the quaint practice of wearing the exuberant objects as a means for their advertisement。
Mrs。 Paget had been accustomed to rule in the little ministry from which Mr。 Paget's celebrated Sin had banished them； and she was inclined to clutch at the sceptre now。 She was the only person I ever met with who was not afraid of the displeasure of my Father。 She would fix her viper…coloured eyes on his； and say with a kind of gimlet firmness； 'I hardly think that is the true interpretation； Brother G。'； or； 'But let us turn to Colossians； and see what the Holy Ghost says there upon this matter。' She fascinated my Father； who was not accustomed to this kind of interruption； and as she was not to be softened by any flattery （such as：'Marvellous indeed； Sister； is your acquaintance with the means of grace！'） she became almost a terror to him。
She abused her powers by taking great liberties； which culminated in her drawing his attention to the fact that my poor stepmother displayed 'an overweening love of dress'。 The accusation was perfectly false； my stepmother was； if rather richly； always； plainly dressed； in the sober Quaker mode； almost her only ornament was a large carnelian brooch； set in flowered flat gold。 To this the envenomed Paget drew my Father's attention as 'likely to lead 〃the little ones of the flock〃 into temptation'。 My poor Father felt it his duty； thus directly admonished； to speak to my mother。 'Do you not think； my Love； that you should； as one who sets an example to others； discard the wearing of that gaudy brooch？〃 One must fasten one s collar with something； I suppose？' 'Well； but how does Sister Paget fasten her collar？' 'Sister Paget；' replied my Mother； stung at last into rejoinder； 'fastens her collar with a pin；and that is a thing which I would rather die than do！'
Nor did I escape the attentions of this zealous reformer。 Mrs。 Paget was good enough to take a great interest in me； and she was not satisfied with the way in which I was being brought up。 Her presence seemed to pervade the village； and I could neither come in nor go out without seeing her hard bonnet and her pursed…up lips。 She would hasten to report to my Father that she saw me laughing and talking 'with a lot of unconverted boys'； these being the companions with whom I had full permission to bathe and boat。 She urged my Father to complete my holy vocation by some definite step； by which he would dedicate me completely to the Lord's service。 Further schooling she thought needless； and merely likely to foster intellectual pride。 Mr。 Paget； she remarked； had troubled very little in his youth about worldly knowledge； and yet how blessed he had been in the conversion of souls until he had incurred the displeasure of the Holy Ghost！
I do not know exactly what she wanted my Father to do with me； perhaps she did not know herself； she was meddlesome； ignorant and fanatical； and she liked to fancy that she was exercising influence。 But the wonderful； the inexplicable thing is that my Father；who； with all his limitations； was so distinguished and high…minded；should listen to her for a moment； and still more wonderful is it that he really allowed her； grim vixen that she was； to disturb his plans and retard his purposes。 I think the explanation lay in the perfectly logical position she took up。 My Father found himself brought face to face at last； not with a disciple； but with a trained expert in his own peculiar scheme of religion。 At every point she was armed with arguments the source of which he knew and the validity of which he recognized。 He trembled before Mrs。 Paget as a man in a dream may tremble before a parody of his own central self； and he could not blame her without laying himself open somewhere to censure。
But my stepmother's instincts were more primitive and her actions less wire…drawn than my Father's。 She disliked Mrs。 Paget as much as one earnest believer can bring herself to dislike a sister in the Lord。 My stepmother had quietly devoted herself to what she thought the best way of bringing me up； and she did not propose now to be thwarted by the wife of a lunatic Baptist。 At this time I was a mixture of childishness and priggishness； of curious knowledge and dense ignorance。 Certain portions of my intellect were growing with unwholesome activity； while others were stunted； or had never stirred at all。 I was lik
