over the teacups-第65章
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years。 It is a long time since I have read the 〃Autocrat;〃 but I
take it up now and then and read in it for a few minutes; not always
without some degree of edification。
These three series of papers; 〃Autocrat;〃 〃Professor;〃 〃Poet;〃 are
all studies of life from somewhat different points of view。 They are
largely made up of sober reflections; and appeared to me to require
some lively human interest to save them from wearisome didactic
dulness。 What could be more natural than that love should find its
way among the young people who helped to make up the circle gathered
around the table? Nothing is older than the story of young love。
Nothing is newer than that same old story。 A bit of gilding here and
there has a wonderful effect in enlivening a landscape or an
apartment。 Napoleon consoled the Parisians in their year of defeat
by gilding the dome of the Invalides。 Boston has glorified her State
House and herself at the expense of a few sheets of gold leaf laid on
the dome; which shines like a sun in the eyes of her citizens; and
like a star in those of the approaching traveller。 I think the
gilding of a love…story helped all three of these earlier papers。
The same need I felt in the series of papers just closed。 The slight
incident of Delilah's appearance and disappearance served my purpose
to some extent。 But what should I do with Number Five? The reader
must follow out her career for himself。 For myself; I think that she
and the Tutor have both utterly forgotten the difference of their
years in the fascination of intimate intercourse。 I do not believe
that a nature so large; so rich in affection; as Number Five's is
going to fall defeated of its best inheritance of life; like a vine
which finds no support for its tendrils to twine around; and so
creeps along the ground from which nature meant that love should lift
it。 I feel as if I ought to follow these two personages of my
sermonizing story until they come together or separate; to fade; to
wither;perhaps to die; at last; of something like what the doctors
call heart…failure; but which might more truly be called heart…
starvation。 When I say die; I do not mean necessarily the death that
goes into the obituary column。 It may come to that; in one or both;
but I think that; if they are never united; Number Five will outlive
the Tutor; who will fall into melancholy ways; and pine and waste;
while she lives along; feeling all the time that she has cheated
herself of happiness。 I hope that is not going to be their fortune;
or misfortune。 Vieille fille fait jeune mariee。 What a youthful
bride Number Five would be; if she could only make up her mind to
matrimony! In the mean time she must be left with her lambs all
around her。 May heaven temper the winds to them; for they have been
shorn very close; every one of them; of their golden fleece of
aspirations and anticipations。
I must avail myself of this opportunity to say a few words to my
distant friends who take interest enough in my writings; early or
recent; to wish to enter into communication with me by letter; or to
keep up a communication already begun。 I have given notice in print
that the letters; books; and manuscripts which I receive by mail are
so numerous that if I undertook to read and answer them all I should
have little time for anything else。 I have for some years depended
on the assistance of a secretary; but our joint efforts have proved
unable; of late; to keep down the accumulations which come in with
every mail。 So many of the letters I receive are of a pleasant
character that it is hard to let them go unacknowledged。 The extreme
friendliness which pervades many of them gives them a value which I
rate very highly。 When large numbers of strangers insist on claiming
one as a friend; on the strength of what he has written; it tends to
make him think of himself somewhat indulgently。 It is the most
natural thing in the world to want to give expression to the feeling
the loving messages from far…off unknown friends must excite。 Many a
day has had its best working hours broken into; spoiled for all
literary work; by the labor of answering correspondents whose good
opinion it is gratifying to have called forth; but who were
unconsciously laying a new burden on shoulders already aching。 I
know too well that what I say will not reach the eyes of many who
might possibly take a hint from it。 Still I must keep repeating it
before breaking off suddenly and leaving whole piles of letters
unanswered。 I have been very heavily handicapped for many years。 It
is partly my own fault。 From what my correspondents tell me; I must
infer that I have established a dangerous reputation for willingness
to answer all sorts of letters。 They come with such insinuating
humility; they cannot bear to intrude upon my time; they know that
I have a great many calls upon it;and incontinently proceed to lay
their additional weight on the load which is breaking my back。
The hypocrisy of kind…hearted people is one of the most painful
exhibitions of human weakness。 It has occurred to me that it might
be profitable to reproduce some of my unwritten answers to
correspondents。 If those which were actually written and sent were
to be printed in parallel columns with those mentally formed but not
written out responses and comments; the reader would get some idea of
the internal conflicts an honest and not unamiable person has to go
through; when he finds himself driven to the wall by a correspondence
which is draining his vocabulary to find expressions that sound as
agreeably; and signify as little; as the phrases used by a
diplomatist in closing an official communication。
No。 1。 Want my autograph; do you? And don't know how to spell my
name。 An a for an e in my middle name。 Leave out the l in my last
name。 Do you know how people hate to have their names misspelled?
What do you suppose are the sentiments entertained by the Thompsons
with a p towards those who address them in writing as Thomson?
No。 2。 Think the lines you mention are by far the best I ever
wrote; hey? Well; I didn't write those lines。 What is more; I think
they are as detestable a string of rhymes as I could wish my worst
enemy had written。 A very pleasant frame of mind I am in for writing
a letter; after reading yours!
No。 3。 I am glad to hear that my namesake; whom I never saw and
never expect to see; has cut another tooth; but why write four pages
on the strength of that domestic occurrence?
No。 4。 You wish to correct an error in my Broomstick poem; do you?
You give me to understand that Wilmington is not in Essex County; but
in Middlesex。 Very well; but are they separated by running water?
Because if they are not; what could hinder a witch from crossing the
line that separates Wilmington from Andover; I should like to know?
I never meant to imply that the witches made no excursions beyond the
district which was more especially their seat of operations。
As I come towards the end of this task which I had set myself; I
wish; of course; that I could have performed it more to my own
satisfaction and that of my readers。 This is a feeling which almost
every one must have at the conclusion of any work he has undertaken。
A common and very simple reason for this disappointment is that most
of us overrate our capacity。 We expect more of ourselves than we
have any right to; in virtue of our endowments。 The figurative
descriptions of the last Grand Assize must no more be taken literally
than the golden crowns; which we do not expect or want to wear on our
heads; or the golden harps; which we do not want or expect to hold in
our hands。 Is it not too true that many religious sectaries think of
the last tribunal complacently; as the scene in which they are to
have the satisfaction of saying to the believers of a creed different
from their own; 〃I told you so〃? Are not oth