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第37章

over the teacups-第37章

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Which offers the best chance of happiness;a marriage between two

persons of the same country; or a marriage where one of the parties

is of foreign birth?  Everything else being equal; which is best for

an American to marry; an American or an English girl?  We need not

confine the question to those two young persons; but put it more

generally。〃



〃There are reasons on both sides;〃 answered Number Five。  〃I have

often talked this matter over with The Dictator。  This is the way he

speaks about it。  English blood is apt to tell well on the stock upon

which it is engrafted。  Over and over again he has noticed finely

grown specimens of human beings; and on inquiry has found that one or

both of the parents or grandparents were of British origin。  The

chances are that the descendants of the imported stock will be of a

richer organization; more florid; more muscular; with mellower

voices; than the native whose blood has been unmingled with that of

new emigrants since the earlier colonial times。 So talks The

Dictator。 I myself think the American will find his English wife

concentrates herself more readily and more exclusively on her

husband;for the obvious reason that she is obliged to live mainly

in him。  I remember hearing an old friend of my early days say;

'A woman does not bear transplanting。'  It does not do to trust these

old sayings; and yet they almost always have some foundation in the

experience of mankind; which has repeated them from generation to

generation。  Happy is the married woman of foreign birth who can say

to her husband; as Andromache said to Hector; after enumerating all

the dear relatives she had lost;



    'Yet while my hector still survives;

     I see My father; mother; brethren; all in thee!'



How many a sorrowing wife; exiled from her native country; dreams of

the mother she shall see no more!  How many a widow; in a strange

land; wishes that her poor; worn…out body could be laid among her

kinsfolk; in the little churchyard where she used to gather daisies

in her childhood!  It takes a great deal of love to keep down the °

climbing sorrow' that swells up in a woman's throat when such

memories seize upon her; in her moments of desolation。  But if a

foreign…born woman does willingly give up all for a man; and never

looks backward; like Lot's wife; she is a prize that it is worth

running a risk to gain;that is; if she has the making of a good

woman in her; and a few years will go far towards naturalizing her。〃



The Tutor listened to Number Five with much apparent interest。  〃And

now;〃 he said; 〃what do you think of her companion?〃



〃A charming girl for a man of a quiet; easy temperament。  The great

trouble is with her voice。  It is pitched a full note too high。  It

is aggressive; disturbing; and would wear out a nervous man without

his ever knowing what was the matter with him。  A good many crazy

Northern people would recover their reason if they could live for a

year or two among the blacks of the Southern States。  But the

penetrating; perturbing quality of the voices of many of our Northern

women has a great deal to answer for in the way of determining love

and friendship。  You remember that dear friend of ours who left us

not long since?  If there were more voices like hers; the world would

be a different place to live in。  I do not believe any man or woman

ever came within the range of those sweet; tranquil tones without

being hushed; captivated; entranced I might almost say; by their

calming; soothing influence。  Can you not imagine the tones in which

those words; 'Peace; be still;' were spoken?  Such was the effect of

the voice to which but a few weeks ago we were listening。  It is hard

to believe that it has died out of human consciousness。  Can such a

voice be spared from that world of happiness to which we fondly look


forward; where we love to dream; if we do not believe with assured

conviction; that whatever is loveliest in this our mortal condition

shall be with us again as an undying possession?  Your English friend

has a very agreeable voice; round; mellow; cheery; and her

articulation is charming。  Other things being equal; I think you; who

are; perhaps; oversensitive; would live from two to three years

longer with her than with the other。  I suppose a man who lived

within hearing of a murmuring brook would find his life shortened if

a sawmill were set up within earshot of his dwelling。〃



〃And so you advise me to make love to the English girl; do you?〃

asked the Tutor。



Number Five laughed。  It was not a loud laugh; she never laughed

noisily; it was not a very hearty laugh; the idea did not seem to

amuse her much。



〃No;〃 she said; 〃I won't take the responsibility。  Perhaps this is a

case in which the true reading of Gay's line would be



          How happy could I be with neither。



There are several young women in the world besides our two Annexes。〃



I question whether the Tutor had asked those questions very

seriously; and I doubt if Number Five thought he was very much in

earnest。





One of The Teacups reminded me that I had promised to say something

of my answers to certain questions。  So I began at once:



I have given the name of brain…tappers to the literary operatives who

address persons whose names are well known to the public; asking

their opinions or their experiences on subjects which are at the time

of general interest。  They expect a literary man or a scientific

expert to furnish them materials for symposia and similar articles;

to be used by them for their own special purposes。  Sometimes they

expect to pay for the information furnished them; at other times; the

honor of being included in a list of noted personages who have

received similar requests is thought sufficient compensation。  The

object with which the brain…tapper puts his questions may be a purely

benevolent and entirely disinterested one。  Such was the object of

some of those questions which I have received and answered。  There

are other cases; in which the brain…tapper is acting much as those

persons do who stop a physician in the street to talk with him about

their livers or stomachs; or other internal arrangements; instead of

going to his office and consulting him; expecting to pay for his

advice。  Others are more like those busy women who; having the

generous intention of making a handsome present to their pastor; at

as little expense as may be; send to all their neighbors and

acquaintances for scraps of various materials; out of which the

imposing 〃bedspread〃 or counterpane is to be elaborated。



That is all very well so long as old pieces of stuff are all they

call for; but it is a different matter to ask for clippings out of

new and uncut rolls of cloth。  So it is one thing to ask an author

for liberty to use extracts from his published writings; and it is a

very different thing to expect him to write expressly for the

editor's or compiler's piece of literary patchwork。



I have received many questions within the last year or two; some of

which I am willing to answer; but prefer to answer at my own time; in

my own way; through my customary channel of communication with the

public。  I hope I shall not be misunderstood as implying any reproach

against the inquirers who; in order to get at facts which ought to be

known; apply to all whom they can reach for information。  Their

inquisitiveness is not always agreeable or welcome; but we ought to

be glad that there are mousing fact…hunters to worry us with queries

to which; for the sake of the public; we are bound to give our

attention。  Let me begin with my brain…tappers。



And first; as the papers have given publicity to the fact that I; The

Dictator of this tea…table; have reached the age of threescore years

and twenty; I am requested to give information as to how I managed to

do it; and to explain just how they can go and do likewise。  I think

I can lay down a few

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