an inland voyage-第21章
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civilised life; where people pass without salutation。 In sparsely inhabited places; we make all we can of each encounter; but when it comes to a city; we keep to ourselves; and never speak unless we have trodden on a man's toes。 In these waters we were no longer strange birds; and nobody supposed we had travelled farther than from the last town。 I remember; when we came into L'Isle Adam; for instance; how we met dozens of pleasure…boats outing it for the afternoon; and there was nothing to distinguish the true voyager from the amateur; except; perhaps; the filthy condition of my sail。 The company in one boat actually thought they recognised me for a neighbour。 Was there ever anything more wounding? All the romance had come down to that。 Now; on the upper Oise; where nothing sailed as a general thing but fish; a pair of canoeists could not be thus vulgarly explained away; we were strange and picturesque intruders; and out of people's wonder sprang a sort of light and passing intimacy all along our route。 There is nothing but tit… for…tat in this world; though sometimes it be a little difficult to trace: for the scores are older than we ourselves; and there has never yet been a settling…day since things were。 You get entertainment pretty much in proportion as you give。 As long as we were a sort of odd wanderers; to be stared at and followed like a quack doctor or a caravan; we had no want of amusement in return; but as soon as we sank into commonplace ourselves; all whom we met were similarly disenchanted。 And here is one reason of a dozen; why the world is dull to dull persons。
In our earlier adventures there was generally something to do; and that quickened us。 Even the showers of rain had a revivifying effect; and shook up the brain from torpor。 But now; when the river no longer ran in a proper sense; only glided seaward with an even; outright; but imperceptible speed; and when the sky smiled upon us day after day without variety; we began to slip into that golden doze of the mind which follows upon much exercise in the open air。 I have stupefied myself in this way more than once; indeed; I dearly love the feeling; but I never had it to the same degree as when paddling down the Oise。 It was the apotheosis of stupidity。
We ceased reading entirely。 Sometimes when I found a new paper; I took a particular pleasure in reading a single number of the current novel; but I never could bear more than three instalments; and even the second was a disappointment。 As soon as the tale became in any way perspicuous; it lost all merit in my eyes; only a single scene; or; as is the way with these FEUILLETONS; half a scene; without antecedent or consequence; like a piece of a dream; had the knack of fixing my interest。 The less I saw of the novel; the better I liked it: a pregnant reflection。 But for the most part; as I said; we neither of us read anything in the world; and employed the very little while we were awake between bed and dinner in poring upon maps。 I have always been fond of maps; and can voyage in an atlas with the greatest enjoyment。 The names of places are singularly inviting; the contour of coasts and rivers is enthralling to the eye; and to hit; in a map; upon some place you have heard of before; makes history a new possession。 But we thumbed our charts; on these evenings; with the blankest unconcern。 We cared not a fraction for this place or that。 We stared at the sheet as children listen to their rattle; and read the names of towns or villages to forget them again at once。 We had no romance in the matter; there was nobody so fancy…free。 If you had taken the maps away while we were studying them most intently; it is a fair bet whether we might not have continued to study the table with the same delight。
About one thing we were mightily taken up; and that was eating。 I think I made a god of my belly。 I remember dwelling in imagination upon this or that dish till my mouth watered; and long before we got in for the night my appetite was a clamant; instant annoyance。 Sometimes we paddled alongside for a while and whetted each other with gastronomical fancies as we went。 Cake and sherry; a homely rejection; but not within reach upon the Oise; trotted through my head for many a mile; and once; as we were approaching Verberie; the CIGARETTE brought my heart into my mouth by the suggestion of oyster…patties and Sauterne。
I suppose none of us recognise the great part that is played in life by eating and drinking。 The appetite is so imperious that we can stomach the least interesting viands; and pass off a dinner… hour thankfully enough on bread and water; just as there are men who must read something; if it were only BRADSHAW'S GUIDE。 But there is a romance about the matter after all。 Probably the table has more devotees than love; and I am sure that food is much more generally entertaining than scenery。 Do you give in; as Walt Whitman would say; that you are any the less immortal for that? The true materialism is to be ashamed of what we are。 To detect the flavour of an olive is no less a piece of human perfection than to find beauty in the colours of the sunset。
Canoeing was easy work。 To dip the paddle at the proper inclination; now right; now left; to keep the head down stream; to empty the little pool that gathered in the lap of the apron; to screw up the eyes against the glittering sparkles of sun upon the water; or now and again to pass below the whistling tow…rope of the DEO GRATIAS of Conde; or the FOUR SONS OF AYMON … there was not much art in that; certain silly muscles managed it between sleep and waking; and meanwhile the brain had a whole holiday; and went to sleep。 We took in; at a glance; the larger features of the scene; and beheld; with half an eye; bloused fishers and dabbling washerwomen on the bank。 Now and again we might be half…wakened by some church spire; by a leaping fish; or by a trail of river grass that clung about the paddle and had to be plucked off and thrown away。 But these luminous intervals were only partially luminous。 A little more of us was called into action; but never the whole。 The central bureau of nerves; what in some moods we call Ourselves; enjoyed its holiday without disturbance; like a Government Office。 The great wheels of intelligence turned idly in the head; like fly… wheels; grinding no grist。 I have gone on for half an hour at a time; counting my strokes and forgetting the hundreds。 I flatter myself the beasts that perish could not underbid that; as a low form of consciousness。 And what a pleasure it was! What a hearty; tolerant temper did it bring about! There is nothing captious about a man who has attained to this; the one possible apotheosis in life; the Apotheosis of Stupidity; and he begins to feel dignified and longaevous like a tree。
There was one odd piece of practical metaphysics which accompanied what I may call the depth; if I must not call it the intensity; of my abstraction。 What philosophers call ME and NOT…ME; EGO and NON EGO; preoccupied me whether I would or no。 There was less ME and more NOT…ME than I was accustomed to expect。 I looked on upon somebody else; who managed the paddling; I was aware of somebody else's feet against the stretcher; my own body seemed to have no more intimate relation to me than the canoe; or the river; or the river banks。 Nor this alone: something inside my mind; a part of my brain; a province of my proper being; had thrown off allegiance and set up for itself; or perhaps for the somebody else who did the paddling。 I had dwindled into quite a little thing in a corner of myself。 I was isolated in my own skull。 Thoughts presented themselves unbidden; they were not my thoughts; they were plainly some one else's; and I considered them like a part of the landscape。 I take it; in short; that I was about as near Nirvana as would be convenient in practical life; and if this be so; I make the Buddhists my sincere compliments; 'tis an agreeable state; not very consistent with mental brilliancy; not exactly profitable in a money point of view; but very calm; golde