the mirror of the sea-第13章

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violently；　so　heavily。　　Once　she　began；　you　felt　that　she　would



never　stop；　and　this　hopeless　sensation；　characterizing　the　motion



of　ships　whose　centre　of　gravity　is　brought　down　too　low　in



loading；　made　everyone　on　board　weary　of　keeping　on　his　feet。　　I



remember　once　over…hearing　one　of　the　hands　say：　　〃By　Heavens；



Jack！　　I　feel　as　if　I　didn't　mind　how　soon　I　let　myself　go；　and　let



the　blamed　hooker　knock　my　brains　out　if　she　likes。〃　　The　captain



used　to　remark　frequently：　　〃Ah；　yes；　I　dare　say　one…third　weight



above　beams　would　have　been　quite　enough　for　most　ships。　　But　then；



you　see；　there's　no　two　of　them　alike　on　the　seas；　and　she's　an



uncommonly　ticklish　jade　to　load。〃







Down　south；　running　before　the　gales　of　high　latitudes；　she　made



our　life　a　burden　to　us。　　There　were　days　when　nothing　would　keep



even　on　the　swing…tables；　when　there　was　no　position　where　you



could　fix　yourself　so　as　not　to　feel　a　constant　strain　upon　all　the



muscles　of　your　body。　　She　rolled　and　rolled　with　an　awful



dislodging　jerk　and　that　dizzily　fast　sweep　of　her　masts　on　every



swing。　　It　was　a　wonder　that　the　men　sent　aloft　were　not　flung　off



the　yards；　the　yards　not　flung　off　the　masts；　the　masts　not　flung



overboard。　　The　captain　in　his　armchair；　holding　on　grimly　at　the



head　of　the　table；　with　the　soup…tureen　rolling　on　one　side　of　the



cabin　and　the　steward　sprawling　on　the　other；　would　observe；



looking　at　me：　　〃That's　your　one…third　above　the　beams。　　The　only



thing　that　surprises　me　is　that　the　sticks　have　stuck　to　her　all



this　time。〃







Ultimately　some　of　the　minor　spars　did　go　…　nothing　important：



spanker…booms　and　such…like　…　because　at　times　the　frightful



impetus　of　her　rolling　would　part　a　fourfold　tackle　of　new　three…



inch　Manilla　line　as　if　it　were　weaker　than　pack…thread。







It　was　only　poetic　justice　that　the　chief　mate　who　had　made　a



mistake　…　perhaps　a　half…excusable　one　…　about　the　distribution　of



his　ship's　cargo　should　pay　the　penalty。　　A　piece　of　one　of　the



minor　spars　that　did　carry　away　flew　against　the　chief　mate's　back；



and　sent　him　sliding　on　his　face　for　quite　a　considerable　distance



along　the　main　deck。　　Thereupon　followed　various　and　unpleasant



consequences　of　a　physical　order　…　〃queer　symptoms；〃　as　the



captain；　who　treated　them；　used　to　say；　inexplicable　periods　of



powerlessness；　sudden　accesses　of　mysterious　pain；　and　the　patient



agreed　fully　with　the　regretful　mutters　of　his　very　attentive



captain　wishing　that　it　had　been　a　straightforward　broken　leg。



Even　the　Dutch　doctor　who　took　the　case　up　in　Samarang　offered　no



scientific　explanation。　　All　he　said　was：　　〃Ah；　friend；　you　are



young　yet；　it　may　be　very　serious　for　your　whole　life。　　You　must



leave　your　ship；　you　must　quite　silent　be　for　three　months　…　quite



silent。〃







Of　course；　he　meant　the　chief　mate　to　keep　quiet　…　to　lay　up；　as　a



matter　of　fact。　　His　manner　was　impressive　enough；　if　his　English



was　childishly　imperfect　when　compared　with　the　fluency　of　Mr。



Hudig；　the　figure　at　the　other　end　of　that　passage；　and　memorable



enough　in　its　way。　　In　a　great　airy　ward　of　a　Far　Eastern　hospital；



lying　on　my　back；　I　had　plenty　of　leisure　to　remember　the　dreadful



cold　and　snow　of　Amsterdam；　while　looking　at　the　fronds　of　the



palm…trees　tossing　and　rustling　at　the　height　of　the　window。　　I



could　remember　the　elated　feeling　and　the　soul…gripping　cold　of



those　tramway　journeys　taken　into　town　to　put　what　in　diplomatic



language　is　called　pressure　upon　the　good　Hudig；　with　his　warm



fire；　his　armchair；　his　big　cigar；　and　the　never…failing　suggestion



in　his　good…natured　voice：　　〃I　suppose　in　the　end　it　is　you　they



will　appoint　captain　before　the　ship　sails？〃　　It　may　have　been　his



extreme　good…nature；　the　serious；　unsmiling　good…nature　of　a　fat；



swarthy　man　with　coal…black　moustache　and　steady　eyes；　but　he　might



have　been　a　bit　of　a　diplomatist；　too。　　His　enticing　suggestions　I



used　to　repel　modestly　by　the　assurance　that　it　was　extremely



unlikely；　as　I　had　not　enough　experience。　　〃You　know　very　well　how



to　go　about　business　matters；〃　he　used　to　say；　with　a　sort　of



affected　moodiness　clouding　his　serene　round　face。　　I　wonder



whether　he　ever　laughed　to　himself　after　I　had　left　the　office。　　I



dare　say　he　never　did；　because　I　understand　that　diplomatists；　in



and　out　of　the　career；　take　themselves　and　their　tricks　with　an



exemplary　seriousness。







But　he　had　nearly　persuaded　me　that　I　was　fit　in　every　way　to　be



trusted　with　a　command。　　There　came　three　months　of　mental　worry；



hard　rolling；　remorse；　and　physical　pain　to　drive　home　the　lesson



of　insufficient　experience。







Yes；　your　ship　wants　to　be　humoured　with　knowledge。　　You　must　treat



with　an　understanding　consideration　the　mysteries　of　her　feminine



nature；　and　then　she　will　stand　by　you　faithfully　in　the　unceasing



struggle　with　forces　wherein　defeat　is　no　shame。　　It　is　a　serious



relation；　that　in　which　a　man　stands　to　his　ship。　　She　has　her



rights　as　though　she　could　breathe　and　speak；　and；　indeed；　there



are　ships　that；　for　the　right　man；　will　do　anything　but　speak；　as



the　saying　goes。







A　ship　is　not　a　slave。　　You　must　make　her　easy　in　a　seaway；　you



must　never　forget　that　you　owe　her　the　fullest　share　of　your



thought；　of　your　skill；　of　your　self…love。　　If　you　remember　that



obligation；　naturally　and　without　effort；　as　if　it　were　an



instinctive　feeling　of　your　inner　life；　she　will　sail；　stay；　run



for　you　as　long　as　she　is　able；　or；　like　a　sea…bird　going　to　rest



upon　the　angry　waves；　she　will　lay　out　the　heaviest　gale　that　ever



made　you　doubt　living　long　enough　to　see　another　sunrise。















XVI。















Often　I　turn　with　melancholy　eagerness　to　the　space　reserved　in　the



newspapers　under　the　general　heading　of　〃Shipping　Intelligence。〃　　I



meet　there　the　names　of　ships　I　have　known。　　Every　year　some　of



these　names　disappear　…　the　names　of　old　friends。　　〃Tempi　passati！〃







The　different　divisions　of　that　kind　of　news　are　set　down　in　their



order；　which　varies　but　slightly　in　its　arrangement　of　concise



headlines。　　And　first　comes　〃Speakings〃　…　reports　of　ships　met　and



signalled　at　sea；　name；　port；　where　from；　where　bound　for；　so　many



days　out；　ending　frequently　with　the　words　〃All　well。〃　　Then　come



〃Wrecks　and　Casualties〃　…　a　longish　array　of　paragraphs；　unless　the



weather　has　been　fair　and　clear；　and　friendly　to　ships　all　over　the



world。







On　some　days　there　appears　the　heading　〃Overdue〃　…　an　ominous



threat　of　loss　and　sorrow　trembling　yet　in　the　balance　of　fate。



There　is　something　sinister　to　a　seaman　in　the　very　grouping　of　the



letters　which　form　this　word；　clear　in　its　meaning；　and　seldom



threatening　in　vain。







Only　a　very　few　days　more　…　appallingly　few　to　the　hearts　which　had



set　themselves　bravely　to　hope　against　hope　…　three　weeks；　a　month



later；　perhaps；　the　name　of　ships　under　the　blight　of　the　〃Overdue〃



heading　shall　appear　again　in　the　column　of　〃Shipping



Intelligence；〃　but　under　the　final　declaration　of　〃Missing。〃







〃The　ship；　or　barque；　or　brig　So…and…so；　bound　from　such　a　port；



with　such　and　such　cargo；　for　such　another　port；　having　left　at



such　and　such　a　date；　last　spoken　at　sea　on　such　a　day；　and　never



having　been　heard　of　since；　was　posted　to…day　as　missing。〃　　Such　in



its　strictly　official　eloquence　is　the　form　of　funeral　orations　on



ships　that；　perhaps　wearied　with　a　long　struggle；　or　in　some



unguarded　moment　that　may　come　to　the　readiest　of　us；　had　let



themselves　be　overwhelmed　by　a　sudden　blow　from　the　enemy。







Who　can　say？　　Perhaps　the　men　she　carried　had　asked　her　to　do　too



much；　had　stretched　beyond　breaking…point　the　enduring　faithfulness



which　seems