the expedition of humphry clinker-第17章

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hand　of　Death　has　actually　dissolved。

The　spirits　and　good　humour　of　the　company　seemed　to　triumph　over
the　wreck　of　their　constitutions。　They　had　even　philosophy　enough
to　joke　upon　their　own　calamities；　such　is　the　power　of
friendship；　the　sovereign　cordial　of　life　　I　afterwards　found；
however；　that　they　were　not　without　their　moments；　and　even　hours
of　disquiet。　Each　of　them　apart；　in　succeeding　conferences；
expatiated　upon　his　own　particular　grievances；　and　they　were　all
malcontents　at　bottom　　Over　and　above　their　personal　disasters；
they　thought　themselves　unfortunate　in　the　lottery　of　life。
Balderick　complained；　that　all　the　recompence　he　had　received　for
his　long　and　hard　service；　was　the　half…pay　of　a　rear…admiral。
The　colonel　was　mortified　to　see　himself　over…topped　by　upstart
generals；　some　of　whom　he　had　once　commanded；　and；　being　a　man　of
a　liberal　turn；　could　ill　put　up　with　a　moderate　annuity；　for
which　he　had　sold　his　commission。　As　for　the　baronet；　having　run
himself　considerably　in　debt；　on　a　contested　election；　he　has
been　obliged　to　relinquish　his　seat　in　parliament；　and　his　seat
in　the　country　at　the　same　time；　and　put　his　estate　to　nurse；　but
his　chagrin；　which　is　the　effect　of　his　own　misconduct；　does　not
affect　me　half　so　much　as　that　of　the　other　two；　who　have　acted
honourable　and　distinguished　parts　on　the　great　theatre；　and　are
now　reduced　to　lead　a　weary　life　in　this　stew…pan　of　idleness　and
insignificance。　They　have　long　left　off　using　the　waters；　after
having　experienced　their　inefficacy。　The　diversions　of　the　place
they　are　not　in　a　condition　to　enjoy。　How　then　do　they　make　shift
to　pass　their　time？　In　the　forenoon　they　crawl　out　to　the　Rooms
or　the　coffeehouse；　where　they　take　a　hand　at　whist；　or　descant
upon　the　General　Advertiser；　and　their　evenings　they　murder　in
private　parties；　among　peevish　invalids；　and　insipid　old　women　
This　is　the　case　with　a　good　number　of　individuals；　whom　nature
seems　to　have　intended　for　better　purposes。

About　a　dozen　years　ago；　many　decent　families；　restricted　to
small　fortunes；　besides　those　that　came　hither　on　the　score　of
health；　were　tempted　to　settle　at　Bath；　where　they　could　then
live　comfortably；　and　even　make　a　genteel　appearance；　at　a　small
expence：　but　the　madness　of　the　times　has　made　the　place　too　hot
for　them；　and　they　are　now　obliged　to　think　of　other　migrations　
Some　have　already　fled　to　the　mountains　of　Wales；　and　others　have
retired　to　Exeter。　Thither；　no　doubt；　they　will　be　followed　by
the　flood　of　luxury　and　extravagance；　which　will　drive　them　from
place　to　place　to　the　very　Land's　End；　and　there；　I　suppose；　they
will　be　obliged　to　ship　themselves　to　some　other　country。　Bath　is
become　a　mere　sink　of　profligacy　and　extortion。　Every　article　of
house…keeping　is　raised　to　an　enormous　price；　a　circumstance　no
longer　to　be　wondered　at；　when　we　know　that　every　petty　retainer
of　fortune　piques　himself　upon　keeping　a　table；　and　thinks　it　is
for　the　honour　of　his　character　to　wink　at　the　knavery　of　his
servants；　who　are　in　a　confederacy　with　the　market…people；　and；
of　consequence；　pay　whatever　they　demand。　Here　is　now　a　mushroom
of　opulence；　who　pays　a　cook　seventy　guineas　a　week　for
furnishing　him　with　one　meal　a　day。　This　portentous　frenzy　is
become　so　contagious；　that　the　very　rabble　and　refuse　of　mankind
are　infected。　I　have　known　a　negro…driver；　from　Jamaica；　pay
over…night；　to　the　master　of　one　of　the　rooms；　sixty…five　guineas
for　tea　and　coffee　to　the　company；　and　leave　Bath　next　morning；
in　such　obscurity；　that　not　one　of　his　guests　had　the　slightest
idea　of　his　person；　or　even　made　the　least　inquiry　about　his
name。　Incidents　of　this　kind　are　frequent；　and　every　day　teems
with　fresh　absurdities；　which　are　too　gross　to　make　a　thinking
man　merry。

　But　I　feel　the　spleen　creeping　on　me　apace；　and　therefore　will
indulge　you　with　a　cessation；　that　you　may　have　no　unnecessary
cause　to　curse　your　correspondence　with；

Dear　Dick；
Yours　ever；
MAT。　BRAMBLE
BATH；　May　5。



To　Miss　LAETITIA　WILLIS；　at　Gloucester。

MY　DEAR　LETTY；

I　wrote　you　at　great　length　by　the　post；　the　twenty…sixth　of　last
month；　to　which　I　refer　you　for　an　account　of　our　proceedings　at
Bath；　and　I　expect　your　answer　with　impatience。　But；　having　this
opportunity　of　a　private　hand；　I　send　you　two　dozen　of　Bath
rings；　six　of　the　best　of　which　I　desire　you　will　keep　for
yourself；　and　distribute　the　rest　among　the　young　ladies；　our
common　friends；　as　you　shall　think　proper　　I　don't　know　how　you
will　approve　of　the　mottoes；　some　of　them　are　not　much　to　my　own
liking；　but　I　was　obliged　to　take　such　as　I　could　find　ready
manufactured　　I　am　vexed；　that　neither　you　nor　I　have　received
any　further　information　of　a　certain　person　　Sure　it　cannot　be
wilful　neglect！　　O　my　dear　Willis！　I　begin　to　be　visited　by
strange　fancies；　and　to　have　some　melancholy　doubts；　which；
however；　it　would　be　ungenerous　to　harbour　without　further
inquiry　　My　uncle；　who　has　made　me　a　present　of　a　very　fine　set
of　garnets；　talks　of　treating　us　with　a　jaunt　to　London；　which；
you　may　imagine；　will　be　highly　agreeable；　but　I　like　Bath　so
well；　that　I　hope　he　won't　think　of　leaving　it　till　the　season　is
quite　over；　and　yet；　betwixt　friends；　something　has　happened　to
my　aunt；　which　will　probably　shorten　our　stay　in　this　place。

Yesterday；　in　the　forenoon；　she　went　by　herself　to　a　breakfasting
in　one　of　the　rooms；　and；　in　half　an　hour；　returned　in　great
agitation；　having　Chowder　along　with　her　in　the　chair。　I　believe
some　accident　must　have　happened　to　that　unlucky　animal；　which　is
the　great　source　of　all　her　troubles。　Dear　Letty！　what　a　pity　it
is；　that　a　woman　of　her　years　and　discretion；　should　place　her
affection　upon　such　an　ugly；　ill…conditioned　cur；　that　snarls　and
snaps　at　every　body。　I　asked　John　Thomas；　the　footman　who
attended　her；　what　was　the　matter？　and　he　did　nothing　but　grin。　A
famous　dog…doctor　was　sent　for；　and　undertook　to　cure　the
patient；　provided　he　might　carry　him　home　to　his　own　house；　but
his　mistress　would　not　part　with　him　out　of　her　own　sight　　She
ordered　the　cook　to　warm　cloths；　which　she　applied　to　his　bowels；
with　her　own　hand。　She　gave　up　all　thoughts　of　going　to　the　ball
in　the　evening；　and　when　Sir　Ulic　came　to　drink　tea；　refused　to
be　seen；　so　that　he　went　away　to　look　for　another　partner。　My
brother　Jery　whistles　and　dances。　My　uncle　sometimes　shrugs　up
his　shoulders；　and　sometimes　bursts　out　a…laughing。　My　aunt　sobs
and　scolds　by　turns；　and　her　woman；　Win。　Jenkins；　stares　and
wonders　with　a　foolish　face　of　curiosity；　and；　for　my　part；　I　am
as　curious　as　she；　but　ashamed　to　ask　questions。

Perhaps　time　will　discover　the　mystery；　for　if　it　was　any　thing
that　happened　in　the　Rooms；　it　cannot　be　long　concealed　　All　I
know　is；　that　last　night　at　supper；　miss　Bramble　spoke　very
disdainfully　of　Sir　Ulic　Mackilligut；　and　asked　her　brother　if　he
intended　to　keep　us　sweltering　all　the　summer　at　Bath？　'No；
sister　Tabitha　（said　he；　with　an　arch　smile）　we　shall　retreat
before　the　Dog…days　begin；　though　I　make　no　doubt；　that　with　a
little　temperance　and　discretion；　our　constitutions　might　be　kept
cool　enough　all　the　year；　even　at　Bath。'　As　I　don't　know　the
meaning　of　this　insinuation；　I　won't　pretend　to　make　any　remarks
upon　it　at　present：　hereafter；　perhaps；　I　may　be　able　to　explain
it　more　to　your　satisfaction　　In　the　mean　time；　I　beg　you　will　be
punctual　in　your　correspondence；　and　continue　to　love　your　ever
faithful

LYDIA　MELFORD
BATH；　May　6。



To　Sir　WATKIN　PHILLIPS；　of　Jesus　college；　Oxon。

So　then　Mrs　Blackerby's　affair　has　proved　a　false　alarm；　and　I
have　saved　my　money？　I　wish；　however；　her　declaration　had　not
been　so　premature；　for　though　my　being　thought　capable　of　making
her　a　mother；　might　have　given　me　some　credit；　the　reputation　of
an　intrigue　with　such　a　cracked　pitcher　does　me　no　honour　at　all
In　my　last　I　told　you　I　had　hopes　of　seeing　Quin；　in　his　hours　of
elevation　at　the　tavern　which　is　the　temple　of　mirth　and　good
fellowship；　where　he；　as　priest　of　Comus；　utters　the　inspirations
of　wit　and　humour　　I　have　had　that　satisfaction。　I　have　dined