winesburg,ohio-第37章
按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
He it was who had put the expression regarding being 〃laundered〃 into the mouth of his former employer。 When excited or surprised by any… thing he smiled vaguely and muttered： 〃I'll be washed and ironed。 Well； well； I'll be washed and ironed and starched。〃
When the half…witted old man left his husking of corn and came into the wood to meet Elmer Cowley； he was neither surprised nor especially interested in the sudden appearance of the young man。 His feet also were cold and he sat on the log by the fire； grateful for the warmth and apparently indifferent to what Elmer had to say。
Elmer talked earnestly and with great freedom； walking up and down and waving his arms about。 〃You don't understand what's the matter with me so of course you don't care；〃 he declared。 〃With me it's different。 Look how it has always been with me。 Father is queer and mother was queer； too。 Even the clothes mother used to wear were not like other people's clothes； and look at that coat in which fa… ther goes about there in town； thinking he's dressed up； too。 Why don't he get a new one？ It wouldn't cost much。 I'll tell you why。 Father doesn't know and when mother was alive she didn't know either。 Mabel is different。 She knows but she won't say anything。 I will； though。 I'm not going to be stared at any longer。 Why look here； Mook； father doesn't know that his store there in town is just a queer jumble； that he'll never sell the stuff he buys。 He knows nothing about it。 Sometimes he's a little wor… ried that trade doesn't come and then he goes and buys something else。 In the evenings he sits by the fire upstairs and says trade will come after a while。 He isn't worried。 He's queer。 He doesn't know enough to be worried。〃
The excited young man became more excited。 〃He don't know but I know；〃 he shouted； stopping to gaze down into the dumb； unresponsive face of the half…wit。 〃I know too well。 I can't stand it。 When we lived out here it was different。 I worked and at night I went to bed and slept。 I wasn't always seeing people and thinking as I am now。 In the evening； there in town； I go to the post office or to the depot to see the train come in； and no one says anything to me。 Everyone stands around and laughs and they talk but they say nothing to me。 Then I feel so queer that I can't talk either。 I go away。 I don't say any… thing。 I can't。〃
The fury of the young man became uncontrollable。 〃I won't stand it；〃 he yelled； looking up at the bare branches of the trees。 〃I'm not made to stand it。〃
Maddened by the dull face of the man on the log by the fire； Elmer turned and glared at him as he had glared back along the road at the town of Winesburg。 〃Go on back to work；〃 he screamed。 〃What good does it do me to talk to you？〃 A thought came to him and his voice dropped。 〃I'm a coward too； eh？〃 he muttered。 〃Do you know why I came clear out here afoot？ I had to tell someone and you were the only one I could tell。 I hunted out another queer one； you see。 I ran away； that's what I did。 I couldn't stand up to someone like that George Willard。 I had to come to you。 I ought to tell him and I will。〃
Again his voice arose to a shout and his arms flew about。 〃I will tell him。 I won't be queer。 I don't care what they think。 I won't stand it。〃
Elmer Cowley ran out of the woods leaving the half…wit sitting on the log before the fire。 Presently the old man arose and climbing over the fence went back to his work in the corn。 〃I'll be washed and ironed and starched；〃 he declared。 〃Well； well； I'll be washed and ironed。〃 Mook was interested。 He went along a lane to a field where two cows stood nibbling at a straw stack。 〃Elmer was here；〃 he said to the cows。 〃Elmer is crazy。 You better get behind the stack where he don't see you。 He'll hurt some… one yet； Elmer will。〃
At eight o'clock that evening Elmer Cowley put his head in at the front door of the office of the Winesburg Eagle where George Willard sat writing。 His cap was pulled down over his eyes and a sullen determined look was on his face。 〃You come on out… side with me；〃 he said； stepping in and closing the door。 He kept his hand on the knob as though pre… pared to resist anyone else coming in。 〃You just come along outside。 I want to see you。〃
George Willard and Elmer Cowley walked through the main street of Winesburg。 The night was cold and George Willard had on a new overcoat and looked very spruce and dressed up。 He thrust his hands into the overcoat pockets and looked inquir… ingly at his companion。 He had long been wanting to make friends with the young merchant and find out what was in his mind。 Now he thought he saw a chance and was delighted。 〃I wonder what he's up to？ Perhaps he thinks he has a piece of news for the paper。 It can't be a fire because I haven't heard the fire bell and there isn't anyone running；〃 he thought。
In the main street of Winesburg； on the cold No… vember evening； but few citizens appeared and these hurried along bent on getting to the stove at the back of some store。 The windows of the stores were frosted and the wind rattled the tin sign that hung over the entrance to the stairway leading to Doctor Welling's office。 Before Hern's Grocery a bas… ket of apples and a rack filled with new brooms stood on the sidewalk。 Elmer Cowley stopped and stood facing George Willard。 He tried to talk and his arms began to pump up and down。 His face worked spasmodically。 He seemed about to shout。 〃Oh； you go on back；〃 he cried。 〃Don't stay out here with me。 I ain't got anything to tell you。 I don't want to see you at all。〃
For three hours the distracted young merchant wandered through the resident streets of Winesburg blind with anger； brought on by his failure to declare his determination not to be queer。 Bitterly the sense of defeat settled upon him and he wanted to weep。 After the hours of futile sputtering at nothingness that had occupied the afternoon and his failure in the presence of the young reporter； he thought he could see no hope of a future for himself。
And then a new idea dawned for him。 In the dark… ness that surrounded him he began to see a light。 Going to the now darkened store； where Cowley & Son had for over a year waited vainly for trade to come； he crept stealthily in and felt about in a barrel that stood by the stove at the rear。 In the barrel beneath shavings lay a tin box containing Cowley & Son's cash。 Every evening Ebenezer Cowley put the box in the barrel when he closed the store and went upstairs to bed。 〃They wouldn't never think of a careless place like that；〃 he told himself； thinking of robbers。
Elmer took twenty dollars； two ten…dollar bills； from the little roll containing perhaps four hundred dollars； the cash left from the sale of the farm。 Then replacing the box beneath the shavings he went qui… etly out at the front door and walked again in the streets。
The idea that he thought might put an end to all of his unhappiness was very simple。 〃I will get out of here； run away from home；〃 he told himself。 He knew that a local freight train passed through Winesburg at midnight and went on to Cleveland； where it arrived at dawn。 He would steal a ride on the local and when he got to Cleveland would lose himself in the crowds there。 He would get work in some shop and become friends with the other workmen and would be indistinguishable。 Then he could talk and laugh。 He would no longer be queer and would make friends。 Life would begin to have warmth and meaning for him as it had for others。
The tall awkward young man； striding through the streets； laughed at himself because he had been angry and had been half afraid of George Willard。 He decided he would have his talk with the young reporter before he left town； that he would tell him about things； perhaps challenge him； challenge all of Winesburg through him。
Aglow with new confidence Elmer went to the office of the New Willard House and pounded on the door。 A sleep…eyed boy slept on a cot in the office。 He received no salary but was fed at the hotel table and bore with pride the title of 〃night clerk。〃 Before the boy Elmer was bold； insistent。 〃You 'wake him up；〃 he commanded。 〃You tell him to come down by
