winesburg,ohio-第14章

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k　possession　of　him。　　On　and　on　he　ran　down　the　hillside；　sobbing　as　he　ran。　　When　he　fell　over　the　roots　of　a　tree　and　in　falling　struck　his　head；　he　arose　and　tried　to　run　on　again。　　His　head　hurt　so　that　presently　he　fell　down　and　lay　still；　but　it　was　only　after　Jesse　had　carried　him　to　the　buggy　and　he　awoke　to　find　the　old　man's　hand　stroking　his　head　tenderly　that　the　terror　left　him。　　〃Take　me　away。　　There　is　a　terrible　man　back　there　in　the　woods；〃　he　declared　firmly；　while　Jesse　looked　away　over　the　tops　of　the　trees　and　again　his　lips　cried　out　to　God。　　〃What　have　I　done　that　Thou　dost　not　approve　of　me；〃　he　whispered　softly；　saying　the　words　over　and　over　as　he　drove　rapidly　along　the　road　with　the　boy's　cut　and　bleeding　head　held　ten…　derly　against　his　shoulder。


III

Surrender

THE　STORY　OF　Louise　Bentley；　who　became　Mrs。　John　Hardy　and　lived　with　her　husband　in　a　brick　house　on　Elm　Street　in　Winesburg；　is　a　story　of　mis…　understanding。

Before　such　women　as　Louise　can　be　understood　and　their　lives　made　livable；　much　will　have　to　be　done。　　Thoughtful　books　will　have　to　be　written　and　thoughtful　lives　lived　by　people　about　them。

Born　of　a　delicate　and　overworked　mother；　and　an　impulsive；　hard；　imaginative　father；　who　did　not　look　with　favor　upon　her　coming　into　the　world；　Louise　was　from　childhood　a　neurotic；　one　of　the　race　of　over…sensitive　women　that　in　later　days　in…　dustrialism　was　to　bring　in　such　great　numbers　into　the　world。

During　her　early　years　she　lived　on　the　Bentley　farm；　a　silent；　moody　child；　wanting　love　more　than　anything　else　in　the　world　and　not　getting　it。　　When　she　was　fifteen　she　went　to　live　in　Winesburg　with　the　family　of　Albert　Hardy；　who　had　a　store　for　the　sale　of　buggies　and　wagons；　and　who　was　a　member　of　the　town　board　of　education。

Louise　went　into　town　to　be　a　student　in　the　Winesburg　High　School　and　she　went　to　live　at　the　Hardys'　because　Albert　Hardy　and　her　father　were　friends。

Hardy；　the　vehicle　merchant　of　Winesburg；　like　thousands　of　other　men　of　his　times；　was　an　enthu…　siast　on　the　subject　of　education。　　He　had　made　his　own　way　in　the　world　without　learning　got　from　books；　but　he　was　convinced　that　had　he　but　known　books　things　would　have　gone　better　with　him。　　To　everyone　who　came　into　his　shop　he　talked　of　the　matter；　and　in　his　own　household　he　drove　his　fam…　ily　distracted　by　his　constant　harping　on　the　subject。

He　had　two　daughters　and　one　son；　John　Hardy；　and　more　than　once　the　daughters　threatened　to　leave　school　altogether。　　As　a　matter　of　principle　they　did　just　enough　work　in　their　classes　to　avoid　pun…　ishment。　　〃I　hate　books　and　I　hate　anyone　who　likes　books；〃　Harriet；　the　younger　of　the　two　girls；　de…　clared　passionately。

In　Winesburg　as　on　the　farm　Louise　was　not　happy。　　For　years　she　had　dreamed　of　the　time　when　she　could　go　forth　into　the　world；　and　she　looked　upon　the　move　into　the　Hardy　household　as　a　great　step　in　the　direction　of　freedom。　　Always　when　she　had　thought　of　the　matter；　it　had　seemed　to　her　that　in　town　all　must　be　gaiety　and　life；　that　there　men　and　women　must　live　happily　and　freely；　giving　and　taking　friendship　and　affection　as　one　takes　the　feel　of　a　wind　on　the　cheek。　　After　the　silence　and　the　cheerlessness　of　life　in　the　Bentley　house；　she　dreamed　of　stepping　forth　into　an　atmosphere　that　was　warm　and　pulsating　with　life　and　reality。　　And　in　the　Hardy　household　Louise　might　have　got　something　of　the　thing　for　which　she　so　hungered　but　for　a　mistake　she　made　when　she　had　just　come　to　town。

Louise　won　the　disfavor　of　the　two　Hardy　girls；　Mary　and　Harriet；　by　her　application　to　her　studies　in　school。　　She　did　not　come　to　the　house　until　the　day　when　school　was　to　begin　and　knew　nothing　of　the　feeling　they　had　in　the　matter。　　She　was　timid　and　during　the　first　month　made　no　acquaintances。　Every　Friday　afternoon　one　of　the　hired　men　from　the　farm　drove　into　Winesburg　and　took　her　home　for　the　week…end；　so　that　she　did　not　spend　the　Saturday　holiday　with　the　town　people。　　Because　she　was　embarrassed　and　lonely　she　worked　constantly　at　her　studies。　　To　Mary　and　Harriet；　it　seemed　as　though　she　tried　to　make　trouble　for　them　by　her　proficiency。　　In　her　eagerness　to　appear　well　Louise　wanted　to　answer　every　question　put　to　the　class　by　the　teacher。　　She　jumped　up　and　down　and　her　eyes　flashed。　　Then　when　she　had　answered　some　ques…　tion　the　others　in　the　class　had　been　unable　to　an…　swer；　she　smiled　happily。　　〃See；　I　have　done　it　for　you；〃　her　eyes　seemed　to　say。　　〃You　need　not　bother　about　the　matter。　　I　will　answer　all　questions。　　For　the　whole　class　it　will　be　easy　while　I　am　here。〃

In　the　evening　after　supper　in　the　Hardy　house；　Albert　Hardy　began　to　praise　Louise。　　One　of　the　teachers　had　spoken　highly　of　her　and　he　was　de…　lighted。　　〃Well；　again　I　have　heard　of　it；〃　he　began；　looking　hard　at　his　daughters　and　then　turning　to　smile　at　Louise。　　〃Another　of　the　teachers　has　told　me　of　the　good　work　Louise　is　doing。　　Everyone　in　Winesburg　is　telling　me　how　smart　she　is。　　I　am　ashamed　that　they　do　not　speak　so　of　my　own　girls。〃　Arising；　the　merchant　marched　about　the　room　and　lighted　his　evening　cigar。

The　two　girls　looked　at　each　other　and　shook　their　heads　wearily。　　Seeing　their　indifference　the　father　became　angry。　　〃I　tell　you　it　is　something　for　you　two　to　be　thinking　about；〃　he　cried；　glaring　at　them。　〃There　is　a　big　change　coming　here　in　America　and　in　learning　is　the　only　hope　of　the　coming　genera…　tions。　　Louise　is　the　daughter　of　a　rich　man　but　she　is　not　ashamed　to　study。　　It　should　make　you　ashamed　to　see　what　she　does。〃

The　merchant　took　his　hat　from　a　rack　by　the　door　and　prepared　to　depart　for　the　evening。　　At　the　door　he　stopped　and　glared　back。　　So　fierce　was　his　man…　ner　that　Louise　was　frightened　and　ran　upstairs　to　her　own　room。　　The　daughters　began　to　speak　of　their　own　affairs。　　〃Pay　attention　to　me；〃　roared　the　merchant。　　〃Your　minds　are　lazy。　　Your　indifference　to　education　is　affecting　your　characters。　　You　will　amount　to　nothing。　　Now　mark　what　I　sayLouise　will　be　so　far　ahead　of　you　that　you　will　never　catch　up。〃

The　distracted　man　went　out　of　the　house　and　into　the　street　shaking　with　wrath。　　He　went　along　muttering　words　and　swearing；　but　when　he　got　into　Main　Street　his　anger　passed。　　He　stopped　to　talk　of　the　weather　or　the　crops　with　some　other　merchant　or　with　a　farmer　who　had　come　into　town　and　forgot　his　daughters　altogether　or；　if　he　thought　of　them；　only　shrugged　his　shoulders。　　〃Oh；　well；　girls　will　be　girls；〃　he　muttered　philosophically。

In　the　house　when　Louise　came　down　into　the　room　where　the　two　girls　sat；　they　would　have　noth…　ing　to　do　with　her。　　One　evening　after　she　had　been　there　for　more　than　six　weeks　and　was　heartbroken　because　of　the　continued　air　of　coldness　with　which　she　was　always　greeted；　she　burst　into　tears。　　〃Shut　up　your　crying　and　go　back　to　your　own　room　and　to　your　books；〃　Mary　Hardy　said　sharply。

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The　room　occupied　by　Louise　was　on　the　second　floor　of　the　Hardy　house；　and　her　window　looked　out　upon　an　orchard。　　There　was　a　stove　in　the　room　and　every　evening　young　John　Hardy　carried　up　an　armful　of　wood　and　put　it　in　a　box　that　stood　by　the　wall。　　During　the　second　month　after　she　came　to　the　house；　Louise　gave　up　all　hope　of　getting　on　a　friendly　footing　with　the　Hardy　girls　and　went　to　her　own　room　as　soon　as　the　evening　meal　was　at　an　end。

Her　mind　began　to　play　with　thoughts　of　making　friends　with　John　Hardy。　　When　he　came　into　the　room　with　the　wood　in　his　arms；　she　pretended　to　be　busy　with　her　studies　but　watched　him　eagerly。　When　he　had　put　the　wood　in　the　box　and　turned　to　go　out；　she　put　down　her　head　and　blushed。　　She　tried　to　make　talk　but　could　say　nothing；　and　after　he　had　gone　she　was　angry　at　herself　for　her　stupidity。

The　mind　of　the　country　girl　became　filled　with　the　idea　of　drawing　close　to　the　young　man。　　She　thought　that　in　him　might　be　found　the　quality　she　had　all　her　life　been　seeking　in　people。　　It　seemed　to　her　that　between　herself　and　all　the　other　people　in　the　world；　a　wall　had　been　built　up　and　that　she　was　living　just　on　the　edge　of　some　warm　inner　circle　of　life　that　must　be