the legacy of cain-第51章

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us；　to　the　last　word。　To　the　last　word；〃　she　repeated
emphaticallywith　a　look　which　sufficiently　informed　me　that　I
had　not　been　betrayed　to　her　father　yet。　〃Will　you　indulge　me？〃
she　asked；　and　offered　her　portfolio　for　the　second　time。

A　more　impudent　bargain　could　not　well　have　been　proposed　to　me。

I　was　to　read；　and　to　be　favorably　impressed　by；　Mr。　Philip
Dunboyne's　letters；　and　Miss　Helena　was　to　say　nothing　of　that
unlucky　slip　of　the　tongue；　relating　to　her　mother；　which　she　had
discovered　to　be　a　serious　act　of　self…betrayalthanks　to　my
confusion　at　the　time。　If　I　had　not　thought　of　Eunice；　and　of　the
desolate　and　loveless　life　to　which　the　poor　girl　was　so
patiently　resigned；　I　should　have　refused　to　read　Miss
Gracedieu's　love…letters。

But；　as　things　were；　I　was　influenced　by　the　hope　（innocently
encouraged　by　Eunice　herself）　that　Philip　Dunboyne　might　not　be
so　wholly　unworthy　of　the　sweet　girl　whom　he　had　injured　as　I　had
hitherto　been　too　hastily　disposed　to　believe。　To　act　on　this
view　with　the　purpose　of　promoting　a　reconciliation　was
impossible；　unless　I　had　the　means　of　forming　a　correct　estimate
of　the　man's　character。　It　seemed　to　me　that　I　had　found　the
means。　A　fair　chance　of　putting　his　sincerity　to　a　trustworthy
test；　was　surely　offered　by　the　letters　（the　confidential
letters）　which　I　had　been　requested　to　read。　To　feel　this　as
strongly　as　I　felt　it；　brought　me　at　once　to　a　decision。　I
consented　to　take　the　portfolioon　my　own　conditions。

〃Understand；　Miss　Helena；〃　I　said；　〃that　I　make　no　promises。　I
reserve　my　own　opinion；　and　my　own　right　of　action。〃

〃I　am　not　afraid　of　your　opinions　or　your　actions；〃　she　answered
confidently；　〃if　you　will　only　read　the　letters。　In　the　meantime；
let　me　relieve　my　sister；　there；　of　my　presence。　I　hope　you　will
soon　recover；　Eunice；　in　the　country　air。〃

If　the　object　of　the　wretch　was　to　exasperate　her　victim；　she　had
completely　failed。　Eunice　remained　as　still　as　a　statue。　To　all
appearance；　she　had　not　even　heard　what　had　been　said　to　her。
Helena　looked　at　me；　and　touched　her　forehead　with　a　significant
smile。　〃Sad；　isn't　it？〃　she　saidand　bowed；　and　went　briskly
away　on　her　household　errand。

We　were　alone　again。

Still；　Eunice　never　moved。　I　spoke　to　her；　and　produced　no
impression。　Beginning　to　feel　alarmed；　I　tried　the　effect　of
touching　her。　With　a　wild　cry；　she　started　into　a　state　of
animation。　Almost　at　the　same　moment；　she　weakly　swayed　to　and
fro　as　if　the　pleasant　breeze　in　the　garden　moved　her　at　its
will；　like　the　flowers。　I　held　her　up；　and　led　her　to　the　seat。

〃There　is　nothing　to　be　afraid　of；〃　I　said。　〃She　has　gone。〃

Eunice's　eyes　rested　on　me　in　vacant　surprise。　〃How　do　you　know？〃
she　asked。　〃I　hear　her；　but　I　never　see　her。　Do　you　see　her？〃

〃My　dear　child！　of　what　person　are　you　speaking？〃

She　answered：　〃Of　no　person。　I　am　speaking　of　a　Voice　that
whispers　and　tempts　me；　when　Helena　is　near。〃

〃What　voice；　Eunice？〃

〃The　whispering　Voice。　It　said　to　me；　'I　am　your　mother；'　it
called　me　Daughter　when　I　first　heard　it。　My　father　speaks　of　my
mother；　the　angel。　That　good　spirit　has　never　come　to　me　from　the
better　world。　It　is　a　mock…mother　who　comes　to　mesome　spirit　of
evil。　Listen　to　this。　I　was　awake　in　my　bed。　In　the　dark　I　heard
the　mock…mother　whispering；　close　at　my　ear。　Shall　I　tell　you　how
she　answered　me；　when　I　longed　for　light　to　see　her　by；　when　I
prayed　to　her　to　show　herself　to　me？　She　said：　'My　face　was
hidden　when　I　passed　from　life　to　death；　my　face　no　mortal
creature　may　see。'　I　have　never　seen　herhow　can　_you_　have　seen
her？　But　I　heard　her　again；　just　now。　She　whispered　to　me　when
Helena　was　standing　therewhere　you　are　standing。　She　freezes
the　life　in　me。　Did　she　freeze　the　life　in　_you？_　Did　you　hear
her　tempting　me？　Don't　speak　of　it；　if　you　did。　Oh；　not　a　word！
not　a　word！〃

A　man　who　has　governed　a　prison　may　say　with　Macbeth；　〃I　have
supped　full　with　horrors。〃　Hardened　as　I　wasor　ought　to　have
beenthe　effect　of　what　I　had　just　heard　turned　me　cold。　If　I
had　not　known　it　to　be　absolutely　impossible；　I　might　have
believed　that　the　crime　and　the　death　of　the　murderess　were　known
to　Eunice；　as　being　the　crime　and　the　death　of　her　mother；　and
that　the　horrid　discovery　had　turned　her　brain。　This　was　simply
impossible。　What　did　it　mean？　Good　God！　what　did　it　mean？

My　sense　of　my　own　helplessness　was　the　first　sense　in　me　that
recovered。　I　thought　of　Eunice's　devoted　little　friend。　A　woman's
sympathy　seemed　to　be　needed　now。　I　rose　to　lead　the　way　out　of
the　garden。

〃Selina　will　think　we　are　lost；〃　I　said。　〃Let　us　go　and　find
Selina。〃

〃Not　for　the　world；〃　she　cried。

〃Why　not？〃

〃Because　I　don't　feel　sure　of　myself。　I　might　tell　Selina
something　which　she　must　never　know；　I　should　be　so　sorry　to
frighten　her。　Let　me　stop　here　with　you。〃

I　resumed　my　place　at　her　side。

〃Let　me　take　your　hand。〃

I　gave　her　my　hand。　What　composing　influence　this　simple　act　may；
or　may　not；　have　exercised；　it　is　impossible　to　say。　She　was
quiet；　she　was　silent。　After　an　interval；　I　heard　her　breathe　a
long…drawn　sigh　of　relief。

〃I　am　afraid　I　have　surprised　you；〃　she　said。　〃Helena　brings　the
dreadful　time　back　to　me〃　She　stopped　and　shuddered。

〃Don't　speak　of　Helena；　my　dear。〃

〃But　I　am　afraid　you　will　thinkbecause　I　have　said　strange
thingsthat　I　have　been　talking　at　random；〃　she　insisted。　〃The
doctor　will　say　that；　if　you　meet　with　him。　He　believes　I　am
deluded　by　a　dream。　I　tried　to　think　so　myself。　It　was　of　no　use；
I　am　quite　sure　he　is　wrong。〃

I　privately　determined　to　watch　for　the　doctor's　arrival；　and　to
consult　with　him。　Eunice　went　on：

〃I　have　the　story　of　a　terrible　night　to　tell　you；　but　I　haven't
the　courage　to　tell　it　now。　Why　shouldn't　you　come　back　with　me
to　the　place　that　I　am　staying　at？　A　pleasant　farm…house；　and
such　kind　people。　You　might　read　the　account　of　that　night　in　my
journal。　I　shall　not　regret　the　misery　of　having　written　it；　if
it　helps　you　to　find　out　how　this　hateful　second　self　of　mine　has
come　to　me。　Hush！　I　want　to　ask　you　something。　Do　you　think
Helena　is　in　the　house？〃

〃Noshe　has　gone　out。〃

〃Did　she　say　that　herself？　Are　you　sure？〃

〃Quite　sure。〃

She　decided　on　going　back　to　the　farm；　while　Helena　was　out　of
the　way。　We　left　the　garden　together。　For　the　first　time；　my
companion　noticed　the　portfolio。　I　happened　to　be　carrying　it　in
the　hand　that　was　nearest　to　her；　as　she　walked　by　my　side。

〃Where　did　you　get　that？〃　she　asked。

It　was　needless　to　reply　in　words。　My　hesitation　spoke　for　me。

〃Carry　it　in　your　other　hand；〃　she　said〃the　hand　that's
furthest　away　from　me。　I　don't　want　to　see　it！　Do　you　mind
waiting　a　moment　while　I　find　Selina？　You　will　go　to　the　farm
with　us；　won't　you？〃

I　had　to　look　over　the　letters；　in　Eunice's　own　interests；　and　I
begged　her　to　let　me　defer　my　visit　to　the　farm　until　the　next
day。　She　consented；　after　making　me　promise　to　keep　my
appointment。　It　was　of　some　importance　to　her；　she　told　me；　that
I　should　make　acquaintance　with　the　farmer　and　his　wife　and
children；　and　tell　her　how　I　liked　them。　Her　plans　for　the　future
depended　on　what　those　good　people　might　be　willing　to　do。　When
she　had　recovered　her　health；　it　was　impossible　for　her　to　go
home　again　while　Helena　remained　in　the　house。　She　had　resolved
to　earn　her　own　living；　if　she　could　get　employment　as　a
governess。　The　farmer's　children　liked　her；　she　had　already
helped　their　mother　in　teaching　them；　and　there　was　reason　to
hope　that　their　father　would　see　his　way　to　employing　her
permanently。　His　house　offered　the　great　advantage　of　being　near
enough　to　the　town　to　enable　her　to　hear　news　of　the　Minister's
progress　toward　recovery；　and　to　see　him　herself　when　safe
opportunities　offered；　from　time　to　ti　me。　As　for　her　salary；
what　did　she　care　about　money？　Anything　would　be　acceptable；　if
the　good　man　would　only　realize　her　hopes　for　the　future。

It　was　disheartening　to　hear　that　hope；　at　her　age；　began　and
ended　within　such　narrow　limits　as　these。　No　prudent　man　would
have　tried　to　persuade　her；　as　I　now　did；　that　the　idea　of
reconc