in flanders fields and other poems-第11章

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at　Neuilly…sur…Seine　met　him　in　the　wards。　　Although　she　had　known　him
for　fifteen　years　she　did　not　recognize　him；　　he　appeared　to　her　so　old；
so　worn；　his　face　lined　and　ashen　grey　in　colour；　his　expression　dull；
his　action　slow　and　heavy。

To　those　who　have　never　seen　John　McCrae　since　he　left　Canada
this　change　in　his　appearance　will　seem　incredible。　　He　was　of　the　Eckfords；
and　the　Eckford　men　were　〃bonnie　men〃；　men　with　rosy　cheeks。　　It　was　a　year
before　I　met　him　again；　and　he　had　not　yet　recovered　from　the　strain。
Although　he　was　upwards　of　forty　years　of　age　when　he　left　Canada
he　had　always　retained　an　appearance　of　extreme　youthfulness。
He　frequented　the　company　of　men　much　younger　than　himself；
and　their　youth　was　imputed　to　him。　　His　frame　was　tall　and　well　knit；
and　he　showed　alertness　in　every　move。　　He　would　arise　from　the　chair
with　every　muscle　in　action；　and　walk　forth　as　if　he　were　about　to　dance。

The　first　time　I　saw　him　he　was　doing　an　autopsy　at
the　Montreal　General　Hospital　upon　the　body　of　a　child
who　had　died　under　my　care。　　This　must　have　been　in　the　year　1900；
and　the　impression　of　boyishness　remained　until　I　met　him　in　France
sixteen　years　later。　　His　manner　of　dress　did　much　to　produce
this　illusion。　　When　he　was　a　student　in　London　he　employed　a　tailor
in　Queen　Victoria　Street　to　make　his　clothes；　but　with　advancing　years
he　neglected　to　have　new　measurements　taken　or　to　alter　the　pattern
of　his　cloth。　　To　obtain　a　new　suit　was　merely　to　write　a　letter；
and　he　was　always　economical　of　time。　　In　those　days　jackets　were　cut　short；
and　he　adhered　to　the　fashion　with　persistent　care。

This　appearance　of　youth　at　times　caused　chagrin　to　those　patients
who　had　heard　of　his　fame　as　a　physician；　and　called　upon　him
for　the　first　time。　　In　the　Royal　Victoria　Hospital；
after　he　had　been　appointed　physician；　he　entered　the　wards
and　asked　a　nurse　to　fetch　a　screen　so　that　he　might　examine　a　patient
in　privacy。

〃Students　are　not　allowed　to　use　screens；〃　the　young　woman　warned　him
with　some　asperity　in　her　voice。

If　I　were　asked　to　state　briefly　the　impression　which　remains　with　me
most　firmly；　I　should　say　it　was　one　of　continuous　laughter。
That　is　not　true；　of　course；　for　in　repose　his　face　was　heavy；
his　countenance　more　than　ruddy；　it　was　even　of　a　〃choleric〃　cast；
and　at　times　almost　livid；　especially　when　he　was　recovering
from　one　of　those　attacks　of　asthma　from　which　he　habitually　suffered。
But　his　smile　was　his　own；　and　it　was　ineffable。　　It　filled　the　eyes；
and　illumined　the　face。　　It　was　the　smile　of　sheer　fun；　of　pure　gaiety；
of　sincere　playfulness；　innocent　of　irony；　with　a　tinge　of　sarcasm　　never。
When　he　allowed　himself　to　speak　of　meanness　in　the　profession；
of　dishonesty　in　men；　of　evil　in　the　world；　his　face　became　formidable。
The　glow　of　his　countenance　deepened；　his　words　were　bitter；
and　the　tones　harsh。　　But　the　indignation　would　not　last。　　The　smile　would
come　back。　　The　effect　was　spoiled。　　Everyone　laughed　with　him。

After　his　experience　at　the　front　the　old　gaiety　never　returned。
There　were　moments　of　irascibility　and　moods　of　irritation。
The　desire　for　solitude　grew　upon　him；　and　with　Bonfire　and　Bonneau
he　would　go　apart　for　long　afternoons　far　afield　by　the　roads　and　lanes
about　Boulogne。　　The　truth　is：　　he　felt　that　he　and　all　had　failed；
and　that　the　torch　was　thrown　from　failing　hands。　　We　have　heard　much
of　the　suffering；　the　misery；　the　cold；　the　wet；　the　gloom　of　those
first　three　winters；　but　no　tongue　has　yet　uttered　the　inner　misery　of　heart
that　was　bred　of　those　three　years　of　failure　to　break　the　enemy's　force。

He　was　not　alone　in　this　shadow　of　deep　darkness。　　Givenchy；　Festubert；
Neuve…Chapelle；　Ypres；　Hooge；　the　Somme　　to　mention　alone　the　battles
in　which　up　to　that　time　the　Canadian　Corps　had　been　engaged　
all　ended　in　failure；　and　to　a　sensitive　and　foreboding　mind
there　were　sounds　and　signs　that　it　would　be　given　to　this　generation　to　hear
the　pillars　and　fabric　of　Empire　come　crashing　into　the　abysm　of　chaos。
He　was　not　at　the　Somme　in　that　October　of　1916；　but　those　who　returned
up　north　with　the　remnants　of　their　division　from　that　place　of　slaughter
will　remember　that；　having　done　all　men　could　do；　they　felt　like　deserters
because　they　had　not　left　their　poor　bodies　dead　upon　the　field
along　with　friends　of　a　lifetime；　comrades　of　a　campaign。
This　is　no　mere　matter　of　surmise。　　The　last　day　I　spent　with　him
we　talked　of　those　things　in　his　tent；　and　I　testify　that　it　is　true。




　　IV

Going　to　the　Wars



John　McCrae　went　to　the　war　without　illusions。　　At　first；
like　many　others　of　his　age；　he　did　not　〃think　of　enlisting〃；
although　〃his　services　are　at　the　disposal　of　the　Country
if　it　needs　them。〃

In　July；　1914；　he　was　at　work　upon　the　second　edition　of
the　‘Text…Book　of　Pathology'　by　Adami　and　McCrae；　published　by　Messrs。
Lea　and　Febiger；　and　he　had　gone　to　Philadelphia　to　read　the　proofs。
He　took　them　to　Atlantic　City　where　he　could　〃sit　out　on　the　sand；
and　get　sunshine　and　oxygen；　and　work　all　at　once。〃

It　was　a　laborious　task；　passing　eighty　to　a　hundred　pages
of　highly　technical　print　each　day。　　Then　there　was　the　index；
between　six　and　seven　thousand　items。　　〃I　have；〃　so　he　writes；
〃to　change　every　item　in　the　old　index　and　add　others。
I　have　a　pile　of　pages；　826　in　all。　　I　look　at　the　index；
find　the　old　page　among　the　826；　and　then　change　the　number。
This　about　7000　times；　so　you　may　guess　the　drudgery。〃　　On　July　15th；
the　work　was　finished；　registered；　and　entrusted　to　the　mail
with　a　special　delivery　stamp。　　The　next　day　he　wrote　the　preface；
〃which　really　finished　the　job。〃　　In　very　truth　his　scientific　work　was　done。

It　was　now　midsummer。　　The　weather　was　hot。　　He　returned　to　Montreal。
Practice　was　dull。　　He　was　considering　a　voyage　to　Havre　and　〃a　little　trip
with　Dr。　Adami〃　when　he　arrived。　　On　July　29th；　he　left　Canada
〃for　better　or　worse。　　With　the　world　so　disturbed；〃　he　records；
〃I　would　gladly　have　stayed　more　in　touch　with　events；　but　I　dare　say
one　is　just　as　happy　away　from　the　hundred　conflicting　reports。〃　　The　ship
was　the　‘Scotian'　of　the　Allan　Line；　and　he　〃shared　a　comfortable　cabin
with　a　professor　of　Greek；〃　who　was　at　the　University　in　his　own　time。

For　one　inland　born；　he　had　a　keen　curiosity　about　ships　and　the　sea。
There　is　a　letter　written　when　he　was　thirteen　years　of　age
in　which　he　gives　an　account　of　a　visit　to　a　naval　exhibition　in　London。
He　describes　the　models　which　he　saw；　and　gives　an　elaborate　table　of　names；
dimensions；　and　tonnage。　　He　could　identify　the　house　flags　and　funnels
of　all　the　principal　liners；　he　could　follow　a　ship　through
all　her　vicissitudes　and　change　of　ownership。　　When　he　found　himself
in　a　seaport　town　his　first　business　was　to　visit　the　water　front
and　take　knowledge　of　the　vessels　that　lay　in　the　stream　or　by　the　docks。
One　voyage　he　made　to　England　was　in　a　cargo　ship。　　With　his　passion　for　work
he　took　on　the　duties　of　surgeon；　and　amazed　the　skipper　with　a　revelation
of　the　new　technique　in　operations　which　he　himself　had　been　accustomed
to　perform　by　the　light　of　experience　alone。

On　the　present　and　more　luxurious　voyage；　he　remarks　that　the　decks
were　roomy；　the　ship　seven　years　old；　and　capable　of　fifteen　knots　an　hour；
the　passengers　pleasant；　and　including　a　large　number　of　French。
All　now　know　only　too　well　the　nature　of　the　business　which　sent
those　ardent　spirits　flocking　home　to　their　native　land。

Forty…eight　hours　were　lost　in　fog。　　The　weather　was　too　thick
for　making　the　Straits；　and　the　‘Scotian'　proceeded　by　Cape　Race
on　her　way　to　Havre。　　Under　date　of　August　5…6　the　first　reference
to　the　war　appears：　　〃All　is　excitement；　the　ship　runs　without　lights。
Surely　the　German　kaiser　has　his　head　in　the　noose　at　last：
it　will　be　a　terrible　war；　and　the　finish　of　one　or　the　other。
I　am　afraid　my　holiday　trip　is　knocked　galley　west；　but　we　shall　see。〃
The　voyage　continues。　　A　〃hundred　miles　from　Moville　we　turned　back；
and　headed　South　for　Queenstown；　thence　to　the　Channel；　put　in　at　Portland；
a　squadron　of　battleships；　arrived　her