the captives-第53章
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Maggie was defiant。 She would just show the creature that she wasn't afraid of her。 She'd give her the note and she might imagine what she pleased。
She got a pencil and a piece of paper and wrote hurriedly。
The week is up on Friday。 Will you meet me that evening at a quarter past six under the Marble Arch？ MAGGIE。
The boldness； the excitement of this inflamed her。 It was so like her to challenge any action once she was in it by taking it to its furthest limit。 She put it in an envelope and wrote Martin's name with a flourish。
〃There！〃 she said； giving it to Caroline。
〃Thank you；〃 said Caroline； and with a number of rather wet and elaborate kisses （Maggie hated kissing） departed。
But her afternoon was not yet over； hardly had Caroline left when the door was opened and Miss Avies was shown in。 Maggie started up with dismay and began to stammer excuses。 Miss Avies brushed them aside。
〃It doesn't matter；〃 she said。 〃You'll do as welleven； it may be； better。〃
A strange woman Miss Avies！ Maggie had； of course； seen her at Chapel； but this was the first time that they had been alone together。 Miss Avies was like a thin rod of black metal； erect and quivering and waiting to strike。 Her long sallow face was stiff； not with outraged virtue； or elaborate pride； or burning scorn； but simply with the accumulated concentration of fiery determination。 She was the very symbol of self…centred energy； inhuman； cold； relentless。 Her hair was jet black and gleamed like steel； and she had thick black eyebrows like ink…marks against her forehead of parchment。 Her eyes were dead； like glass eyes； and she had some false teeth that sometimes clicked in her mouth。 She wore a black dress with no ornament and thin black gloves。
She did not seem； however； to Maggie unkindly； as she stood there； looking about the room rather short…sightedly。 （She would not wear glasses。 Could it have been vanity？） She was not hostile； nor scornful； nor even patronising 。 。 。 but had Maggie been struck there； dead at her feet she would not have moved a step to help her。 Her voice was ugly； with a crack in it； as though it needed oil。 Maggie； as she looked at her； did not need to be told that she did not believe in Mr。 Warlock's mysticism。 She came across and shook Maggie's hand。 Her touch was cold and stiff and a little damp like that of a wet stone。
〃Sorry your Aunt's out；〃 she said； 〃but I can talk to you for a while。〃 She looked at Maggie for a moment。 Then she said：
〃Why don't you clear out of all this？〃
The voice was so abrupt and the words so unexpected that Maggie jumped。
〃Why don't I？〃 she repeated。
〃Yes； you；〃 said Miss Avies。 〃You've no place here in all this business。 You don't believe in it； do you？〃
〃No；〃 said Maggie。
〃And you don't want to use it for something you do believe in？〃
〃No；〃 said Maggie。 〃Well then； clear out。〃
Maggie； colouring a little； said：
〃My aunts have been very good to me。 I oughtn't to leave them。〃
〃Fiddlesticks；〃 said Miss Avies。 〃Your life's your own； not your aunts'。〃
She sat down and stayed bolt upright and motionless near the fire； she flung a thin dark shadow like a stain on the wall。 There was a long pause between them。 After that abrupt opening there seemed to be nothing to say。 Maggie's thoughts also were elsewhere。 She was wishing now passionately that she had not given that note to Caroline。
Suddenly Miss Avies said； 〃What do you do with yourself all day？〃
Maggie laughed。 〃Try and make myself less careless； Miss Avies。〃
Miss Avies replied； 〃You'll never make yourself less careless。 We are as we are。〃
〃But don't you think；〃 said Maggie； 〃that one can cure one's faults？〃
〃One gets rid of one only to make room for another 。 。 。 But that doesn't matter。 The point is that one should have an ambition。 What's your ambition； child？〃
Maggie didn't answer。 Her ambition was Martin； but she couldn't tell Miss Avies so。
At last； after a long pause； as Miss Avies still seemed to be waiting； she answered：
〃I suppose that I want to earn my livingto be independent。〃
〃Well； leave this place then；〃 said Miss Avies。 〃There's no independence here。〃 Then added； as though to herself。 〃They think they're looking for the face of God 。 。 。 It's only for themselves and their vanity they're looking。〃
Maggie said； to break another of the long pauses that seemed to be always forming between them：
〃I think every one ought to earn their own living； don't you？〃
Miss Avies shook her head。 〃You're very youngterribly young。 I've got no advice to give you except to lead a healthy life somewhere away from these surroundings。 We're an unnatural lot here and you're a healthy young creature 。 。 。 Have you got a lover？〃
Maggie smiled。 〃I've got a friend；〃 she said。 Miss Avies sighed。 〃That's more than I've got；〃 she said。
〃Not that I've time for one；〃 she added。 She got up。 〃I won't wait for your aunt；〃 she said； 〃I've left a note downstairs 。 。 。 You clear out as soon as you can； that's my advice to you。〃
She said good…bye； looking into Maggie's clear eyes。 She was suddenly less inhuman； the touch of her hand was warmer。
〃Don't you cheat yourself into believing in the Deity；〃 she said； and was gone。
When Friday arrived Maggie had not seen Caroline again； and she could not tell whether the note had been safely delivered or no。 She was not sure what she had better do。 Caroline might hare done anything with the note； torn it up； burnt it； lost it； forgotten it altogether。 Well； that was a risk that Maggie must take。 If he did not appear she would wait a little while and then come away。 They must soon meet in any case。 They had all their lives before them。
Aunt Anne was up againvery； very pale now and so thin that the light seemed to shine through her making her more of a stained window saint than ever。
Maggie told her about the visit； Aunt Anne looked at her curiously。 She seemed so weak and frail that Maggie suddenly felt warm maternal love。 Rather shyly she put her hand upon her aunt's： 〃I won't go away until you're better〃
Aunt Anne nodded her head。
〃I know you won't； dear；〃 she said。 〃Don't be out late to…day。 We shall be anxious about you。〃
Maggie had made a promise and was terrified when she thought of it。 Suppose her aunt did not get better for years and years？
People often had long lingering illnesses with no apparent change in their condition。 To Maggie a promise was an utterly final thing。 She could not dream that one ever broke one's word。 She trembled now when she thought of what she had done。 She had been entrapped after all and by her own free will。
In her little room as she was putting on her hat she suddenly prayed to a God； of whom she knew nothing； that her aunt might get better soon。
She started out on her great adventure with a strange self…assurance as though loving Martin had given her the wisdom of all the ages。
Turning down the street towards the Strand she found almost at once a taxi…cab drawn up； as though it had been waiting there especially for her like an eloping coach in a romantic tale。 A fat red…faced fellow with a purple nose； a cloth cap and a familiar vague eye； as though he always saw further than he intended； waited patiently for her to speak。
Boldly； as though she had done such things all her life； she said； 〃Fourteen Bryanston Square。〃 Then she slipped in and was hidden from the gay world。 She sat there； her hands on her lap staring at the three crimson rolls in the neck of her driver。 She was thinking of nothing； nothing at all。 Did she struggle to think？ Only words would come； 〃Martin；〃 or 〃Bryanston Square；〃 or 〃cab；〃 again and again； words that did not mean anything but physical sensations。 〃Martin〃 hot fire at the throat； 〃Bryanston Square〃 an iron rod down the spine； and 〃cab〃 dust and ashes in the eyes。
She tried to look at herself in the little mirror opposite her； but she could only catch the corner of her cheek and half her hat。 But she minded less about her appearance now。 If Martin could love her it did not matter what others thoughtnevertheless she pulled her hat about a little and patted her dress。 The cab stopped and she felt desperately lonely。 Did any one care about her anywhere？
