the captives-第37章

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He　left　her　as　he　heard　the　bolt　turn　in　the　door；　hurrying　away　as　though　he　did　not　want　to　be　seen。　Maggie　went　in　to　find　old　Martha　with　her　crabbed　face　watching　her　sourly。　But　she　did　not　care；　nothing　could　touch　her　now。　Even　the　old　woman；　cross　with　waiting　by　the　fading　kitchen　fire；　noticed　the　light　in　the　girl's　eyes。　She　had　always　thought　the　girl　hard　and　ungracious；　but　now　that　face　was　soft；　and　the　mouth　smiling　over　its　secret　thoughts；　and　the　eyes　sleepy　with　happiness。

Maggie　could　have　said：　〃I'm　wild　with　joy；　Martha。　I　know　what　love　is。　I　had　never　thought　that　it　could　be　like　this。　Be　kind　to　me　because　it's　the　greatest　night　of　my　life。〃

Martha　said：　〃There's　some　milk　hotted　for　you；　Miss；　and　some　biscuits。　There　on　the　table　by　the　stairs。〃

〃Oh；　I　don't　want　anything；　Martha；　thank　you！〃

〃Your　aunt　said　you　was　to　have　it。〃

Maggie　drank　it　down；　Martha　watching　her。　Then　she　went　upstairs　softly；　as　though　her　joy　might　awaken　the　whole　house。　She　lay　wide…eyed　on　her　bed　for　hours；　then　fell　into　a　heavy　sleep；　deep；　without　dreams。

When；　in　the　quieter　light　of　the　morning；　she　considered　the　event；　she　had　no　doubts　nor　hesitations。　She　loved　Martin　and　Martin　loved　her。　Soon　Martin　would　marry　her　and　they　would　go　away。　Her　aunt　would　be　sorry　of　course；　and　his　father；　perhaps；　would　be　angry；　but　the　sorrow　and　anger　would　be　only　for　a　little　while。　Then　Martin　and　she　would　live　happily　together　alwayshappily　because　they　were　both　sensible　people；　and　her　own　standard　of　fidelity　and　trust　was；　she　supposed；　also　his。　She　did　not　think　very　deeply　about　what　he　had　said　to　her；　it　only　meant　that　he　wanted　to　escape　from　his　family；　a　desire　in　which　she　could　completely　sympathise。　She　had　loved　him；　as　she　now　saw；　from　the　first　moment　of　meeting；　and　she　would　love　him　always。　She　would　never　be　alone　again；　and　although　Martin　had　told　her　that　he　was　weak；　and　she　knew　something　about　men；　she　was　aware　that　their　love　for　one　another　would　be　a　thing　apart；　constant；　unfaltering；　eternal。　She　had　read　no　modern　fiction；　she　knew　nothing　about　psychology：　she　was　absolutely　happy　。　。　。

And　then　in　that　very　first　day　she　discovered　that　life　was　not　quite　so　simple。　In　the　first　place；　she　wanted　Martin　desperately　and　he　did　not　come；　and　although　she　had　at　once　a　thousand　sensible　reasons　for　the　impossibility　of　his　coming；　nevertheless　strange　new　troubles　and　suspicions　that　she　had　never　known　before　rose　in　her　heart。　She　had　only　kissed　him　once；　he　had　only　held　her　in　his　arms　for　a　few　moments　。　。　。She　waited；　looking　from　behind　the　drawing…room　curtains　out　into　the　street。　How　could　he　let　the　whole　day　go　by？　He　was　prevented；　perhaps；　by　that　horrible　sister　of　his。　When　the　dusk　came　and　the　muffin…man　went　ringing　his　bell　down　the　street　she　felt　exhausted　as　though　she　had　been　running　for　miles　。　。　。

Then　with　sudden　guilty　realisation　of　the　absorption　that　had　held　her　all　day　she　wondered　how　much　her　aunt　had　noticed。

During　the　afternoon　when　she　had　been　watching　the　streets　from　behind　the　curtain　Aunt　Elizabeth　had　sat　sewing；　Thomas　the　cat　lumped　before　the　fire；　the　whole　room　bathed　in　afternoon　silence。　Maggie　had　watched　as　though　hypnotized　by　the　street　itself；　marking　the　long　squares　of　light；　the　pools　of　shadow；　the　lamp…　posts；　the　public…house　at　the　corner；　the　little　grocer's　shop　with　cases　of　oranges　piled　outside　the　door；　the　windows　on　the　second　floor　of　the　dressmaker's；　through　which　you　could　see　a　dummy…　figure　and　a　young　woman　with　a　pale　face　and　shiny　black　hair；　who　came　and　glanced　out　once　and　again；　as　though　to　reassure　herself　that　the　gay　world　was　still　there。

The　people；　the　horses　and　carts；　the　cabs　went　on　their　way。　Often　it　seemed　that　this　figure　must　be　Martin'snow　thisnow　this　。　。　。　And　on　every　occasion　Maggie's　heart　rose　in　her　breast；　hammered　at　her　eyes；　then　sank　again。　Over　and　over　she　told　to　herself　every　incident　of　yesterday's　meeting。　Always　it　ended　in　that　same　wonderful　climax　when　she　was　caught　to　his　breast　and　felt　his　hand　at　her　neck　and　then　his　mouth　upon　hers。　She　could　still　feel　against　her　skin　the　rough　warm　stuff　of　his　coat　and　the　soft　roughness　of　his　cheek　and　the　stiff　roughness　of　his　hair。　She　could　still　feel　how　his　mouth　had　just　touched　hers　and　then　suddenly　gripped　it　as　though　it　would　never　let　it　go；　then　she　had　been　absorbed　by　him；　into　his　very　heart；　so　that　still　now　she　felt　as　though　with　his　strong　arms　and　his　hard　firm　body　he　was　around　her　and　about　her。

Oh；　she　loved　him！　she　loved　him！　but　why　did　he　not　come？　Had　he　been　able　only　to　pass　down　the　street　and　smile　up　to　her　window　as　he　went　that　would　have　been　something。　It　would　at　least　have　reassured　her　that　yesterday　was　not　a　dream；　an　invention；　and　that　he　was　still　there　and　thought　of　her　and　cared　for　her　。　。　。

She　pulled　herself　together。　At　the　sound　of　the　muffin…man's　bell　she　came　back　into　her　proper　world。　She　would　be　patient；　as　she　had　once　resolved　outside　Borhedden　Farm；　so　now　she　swore　that　she　would　owe　nothing　to　any　man。

If　she　should　love　Martin　Warlock　it　would　not　be　for　anything　that　she　expected　to　get　from　him；　but　only　for　the　love　that　she　had　it　in　her　to　give。　If　good　came　of　it；　well；　if　not；　she　was　still　her　own　master。

But　more　than　ever　now　was　it　impossible　to　be　open　with　her　aunts。　How　strange　it　was　that　from　the　very　beginning　there　had　been　concealments　between　Aunt　Anne　and　herself。　Perhaps　if　they　had　been　open　to　one　another　at　the　first　all　would　have　been　well。　Now　it　was　too　late。

Tea　came　in；　and；　with　tea；　Aunt　Anne。　It　was　the　first　time　that　day　that　Maggie　had　seen　her；　and　now；　conscious　of　the　news　that　Martin　had　given　her；　she　felt　a　movement　of　sympathy；　of　pity　and　affection。　Aunt　Anne　had　been　in　her　room　all　day；　and　she　seemed　as　she　walked　slowly　to　the　fire　to　be　of　a　finer　pallor；　a　more　slender　body　than　ever。　Maggie　felt　as　though　she　could　see　the　firelight　through　her　body；　and　with　that　came　also　the　conviction　that　Aunt　Anne　knew　everything；　knew　about　Martin　and　the　posted　letter　and　the　thoughts　of　escape。　Maggie　herself　was　tired　with　the　trial　of　her　waiting　day；　she　was　exhausted　and　was　beating；　with　all　her　resolve；　against　a　disappointment　that　hammered　with　a　thundering　noise；　somewhere　far　away　in　the　recesses　of　her　soul。　So　they　all　drew　around　the　fire　and　had　their　tea。

Aunt　Anne；　leaning　back　in　her　chair；　her　beautiful　hands　stretched　out　on　the　arms；　a　fine　white　shawl　spread　on　her　knees；　asked　Maggie　about　last　night。

〃I　hope　you　enjoyed　yourself；　dear。〃　〃Very　much；　Aunt　Anne。　Uncle　Mathew　was　very　kind。〃

〃What　did　you　do？〃

Maggie　flushed。　It　was　deceit　and　lies　now　all　the　time；　and　oh！　how　she　hated　lies！　But　she　went　on：

〃Do　you　know；　Aunt　Anne；　I　think　Uncle　Mathew　is　so　changed。　He's　younger　and　everything。　He　talked　quite　differently　last　night；　about　his　business　and　all　that　he's　doing。　He's　got　his　money　in　malt　now；　he　says。〃

〃Whose　money？〃　asked　Aunt　Anne。

〃His　own；　he　says。　I　never　knew　he　had　any。　But　he　says　yes；　it's　in　malt。　It's　not　a　nice　hotel；　though；　where　he　lives。〃

〃Not　nice；　dear？〃

〃No；　I　didn't　like　it。　But　it's　only　for　men　really　of　course。〃

〃I　think　he'd　better　take　you　somewhere　else　next　time。　I'll　speak　to　him。　By　the　way；　Maggie　dear；　Martha　tells　me　you　went　out　yesterday　afternoon　all　aloneinto　the　Strand。　I　think　it　would　be　better　if　you　were　to　tell　us。〃

Maggie's　cheeks　were　hot。　She　set　back　her　shoulders。

〃How　does　Martha　know？〃　she　asked　quickly。　〃I　only　went　for　a　momentonly　for　a　little　walk。　But　I'm　grown　up；　Aunt　Anne。　Surely　I　can　go　out　by　myself　if　。　。　。〃　she　stopped；　looking　away　from　them　into　the　fire。

〃It　isn't　that；　dear；〃　Aunt　Anne　said　very　gently。　〃It's　only　that　you've　been　so　little　a　time　in　London　that　you　can't　know　your　way　about　yet。　And　London's　a　strange　place。　It　might　be　unpleasant　for　you　alone。　I'd　rather　that　you　told　us　first。〃

Then　Maggie　delivered　her　challenge。

〃But；　aunt；　I　won't　be　always　here。　I'm　going　off　to　earn　my　living　soon；　a