andersonville-第68章

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sleeping　under　the　most　discouraging　circumstances。　　These；　I　have　no
doubt；　were　of　the　greatest　assistance　to　me　in　my　struggle　for
existence。　　But　now　the　rations　became　fearfully　obnoxious　to　me；　and　it
was　only　with　the　greatest　effortpulling　the　bread　into　little　pieces
and　swallowing　each；　of　these　as　one　would　a　pillthat　I　succeeded　in
worrying　the　stuff　down。　　I　had　not　as　yet　fallen　away　very　much；　but　as
I　had　never；　up；　to　that　time；　weighed　so　much　as　one　hundred　and　twenty…
five　pounds；　there　was　no　great　amount　of　adipose　to　lose。　　It　was
evident　that　unless　some　change　occurred　my　time　was　near　at　hand。

There　was　not　only　hunger　for　more　food；　but　longing　with　an　intensity
beyond　expression　for　alteration　of　some　kind　in　the　rations。
The　changeless　monotony　of　the　miserable　saltless　bread；　or　worse　mush；
for　days；　weeks　and　months；　became　unbearable。　　If　those　wretched　mule
teams　had　only　once　a　month　hauled　in　something　differentif　they　had
come　in　loaded　with　sweet　potatos；　green　corn　or　wheat　flour；　there　would
be　thousands　of　men　still　living　who　now　slumber　beneath　those　melancholy
pines。　　It　would　have　given　something　to　look　forward　to；　and　remember
when　past。　　But　to　know　each　day　that　the　gates　would　open　to　admit　the
same　distasteful　apologies　for　food　took　away　the　appetite　and　raised
one's　gorge；　even　while　famishing　for　something　to　eat。

We　could　for　a　while　forget　the　stench；　the　lice；　the　heat；　the　maggots；
the　dead　and　dying　around　us；　the　insulting　malignance　of　our　jailors；
but　it　was；　very　hard　work　to　banish　thoughts　and　longings　for　food　from
our　minds。　　Hundreds　became　actually　insane　from　brooding　over　it。　　Crazy
men　could　be　found　in　all　parts　of　the　camp。　　Numbers　of　them　wandered
around　entirely　naked。　　Their　babblings　and　maunderings　about　something
to　eat　were　painful　to　hear。　　I　have　before　mentioned　the　case　of　the
Plymouth　Pilgrim　near　me；　whose　insanity　took　the　form　of　imagining　that
he　was　sitting　at　the　table　with　his　family；　and　who　would　go　through　the
show　of　helping　them　to　imaginary　viands　and　delicacies。　　The　cravings
for　green　food　of　those　afflicted　with　the　scurvy　were；　agonizing。　　Large
numbers　of　watermelons　were　brought　to　the　prison；　and　sold　to　those　who
had　the　money　to　pay　for　them　at　from　one　to　five　dollars；　greenbacks；
apiece。　　A　boy　who　had　means　to　buy　a　piece　of　these　would　be　followed
about　while　eating　it　by　a　crowd　of　perhaps　twenty…five　or　thirty　livid…
gummed　scorbutics；　each　imploring　him　for　the　rind　when　he　was　through
with　it。

We　thought　of　food　all　day；　and　were　visited　with　torturing　dreams　of　it
at　night。　　One　of　the　pleasant　recollections　of　my　pre…military　life　was
a　banquet　at　the　〃Planter's　House；〃　St。　　Louis；　at　which　I　was　a　boyish
guest。　　It　was；　doubtless；　an　ordinary　affair；　as　banquets　go；　but　to　me
then；　with　all　the　keen　appreciation　of　youth　and　first　experience；　it
was　a　feast　worthy　of　Lucullus。　　But　now　this　delightful　reminiscence
became　a　torment。　　Hundreds　of　times　I　dreamed　I　was　again　at　the
〃Planter's。〃　　I　saw　the　wide　corridors；　with　their　mosaic　pavement；
I　entered　the　grand　dining…room；　keeping　timidly　near　the　friend　to　whose
kindness　I　owed　this　wonderful　favor；　I　saw　again　the　mirror…lined　walls；
the　evergreen　decked　ceilings；　the　festoons　and　mottos；　the　tables
gleaming　with　cutglass　and　silver；　the　buffets　with　wines　and　fruits；
the　brigade　of　sleek；　black；　white…aproned　waiters；　headed　by　one　who　had
presence　enough　for　a　major　General。　　Again　I　reveled　in　all　the　dainties
and　dishes　on　the　bill…of…fare；　calling　for　everything　that　I　dared　to；
just　to　see　what　each　was　like；　and　to　be　able　to　say　afterwards　that　I
had　partaken　of　it；　all　these　bewildering　delights　of　the　first
realization　of　what　a　boy　has　read　and　wondered　much　over；　and　longed
for；　would　dance　their　rout　and　reel　through　my　somnolent　brain。　　Then　I
would　awake　to　find　myself　a　half…naked；　half…starved；　vermin…eaten
wretch；　crouching　in　a　hole　in　the　ground；　waiting　for　my　keepers　to
fling　me　a　chunk　of　corn　bread。

Naturally　the　boysand　especially　the　country　boys　and　new　prisoners
talked　much　of　victualswhat　they　had　had；　and　what　they　would　have
again；　when　they　got　out。　　Take　this　as　a　sample　of　the　conversation
which　might　be　heard　in　any　group　of　boys；　sitting　together　on　the　sand；
killin　lice　and　talking　of　exchange：

Tom〃Well；　Bill；　when　we　get　back　to　God's　country；　you　and　Jim　and　John
must　all　come　to　my　house　and　take　dinner　with　me。　　I　want　to　give　you　a
square　meal。　　I　want　to　show　you　just　what　good　livin'　is。　　You　know　my
mother　is　just　the　best　cook　in　all　that　section。　　When　she　lays　herself
out　to　get　up　a　meal　all　the　other　women　in　the　neighborhood　just　stand
back　and　admire　〃

Bill〃O；　that's　all　right；　but　I'll　bet　she　can't　hold　a　candle　to　my
mother；　when　it　comes　to　good　cooking。〃

Jim　〃No；　nor　to　mine。〃

John（with　patronizing　contempt。）　〃O；　shucks！　　None　of　you　fellers　were
ever　at　our　house；　even　when　we　had　one　of　our　common　weekday　dinners。〃

Tom（unheedful　of　the　counter　claims。）　I　hev　teen　studyin'　up　the　dinner
I'd　like；　and　the　bill…of…fare　I'd　set　out　for　you　fellers　when　you　come
over　to　see　me。　　First；　of　course；　we'll　lay　the　foundation　like　with　a
nice；　juicy　loin　roast；　and　some　mashed　potatos。

Bill（interrupting。）　〃Now；　do　you　like　mashed　potatos　with　beef？　　The
way　may　mother　does　is　to　pare　the　potatos；　and　lay　them　in　the　pan　along
with　the　beef。　　Then；　you　know；　they　come　out　just　as　nice　and　crisp；　and
brown；；　they　have　soaked　up　all　the　beef　gravy；　and　they　crinkle　between
your　teeth〃

Jim〃Now；　I　tell　you；　mashed　Neshannocks　with　butter　on　'em　is　plenty
good　enough　for　me。〃

John〃If　you'd　et　some　of　the　new　kind　of　peachblows　that　we　raised　in
the　old　pasture　lot　the　year　before　I　enlisted；　you'd　never　say　another
word　about　your　Neshannocks。〃

Tom（taking　breath　and　starting　in　fresh。）　〃Then　we'll　hev　some　fried
Spring　chickens；　of　our　dominick　breed。　　Them　dominicks　of　ours　have　the
nicest；　tenderest　meat；　better'n　quail；　a　darned　sight；　and　the　way　my
mother　can　fry　Spring　chickens〃

Bill（aside　to　Jim。）　〃Every　durned　woman　in　the　country　thinks　she　can
'spry　ching　frickens；'　but　my　mother…〃

John〃You　fellers　all　know　that　there's　nobody　knows　half　as　much　about
chicken　doin's　as　these　'tinerant　Methodis'　preachers。　　They　give　'em
chicken　wherever　they　go；　and　folks　do　say　that　out　in　the　new
settlements　they　can't　get　no　preachin'；　no　gospel；　nor　nothin'；　until
the　chickens　become　so　plenty　that　a　preacher　is　reasonably　sure　of
havin'　one　for　his　dinner　wherever　he　may　go。　　Now；　there's　old　Peter
Cartwright；　who　has　traveled　over　Illinoy　and　Indianny　since　the　Year
One；　and　preached　more　good　sermons　than　any　other　man　who　ever　set　on
saddle…bags；　and　has　et　more　chickens　than　there　are　birds　in　a　big
pigeon　roost。　　Well；　he　took　dinner　at　our　house　when　he　came　up　to
dedicate　the　big；　white　church　at　Simpkin's　Corners；　and　when　he　passed
up　his　plate　the　third　time　for　more　chicken；　he　sez；　sez　he：I've　et
at　a　great　many　hundred　tables　in　the　fifty　years　I　have　labored　in　the
vineyard　of　the　Redeemer；　but　I　must　say；　Mrs。　Kiggins；　that　your　way　of
frying　chickens　is　a　leetle　the　nicest　that　I　ever　knew。　　I　only　wish
that　the　sisters　generally　would　get　your　reseet。'　　Yes；　that's　what　he
said；'a　leetle　the　nicest。'〃

Tom〃An'　then；　we'll　hev　biscuits　an'　butter。　　I'll　just　bet　five
hundred　dollars　to　a　cent；　and　give　back　the　cent　if　I　win；　that　we　have
the　best　butter　at　our　house　that　there　is　in　Central　Illinoy。　　You　can't
never　hev　good　butter　onless　you　have　a　spring　house；　there's　no　use　of
talkin'all　the　patent　churns　that　lazy　men　ever　inventedall　the　fancy
milk　pans　an'　coolers；　can't　make　up　for　a　spring　house。　　Locations　for　a
spring　house　are　scarcer　than　hen's　teeth　in　Illinoy；　but　we　hev　one；　and
there　ain't　a　better　one　in　Orange　County；　New　York。　　Then　you'll　see
dome　of　the　biscuits　my　mother　makes。〃

Bill〃Well；　now；　my　mother's　a　boss　biscuit…maker；　too。〃

Jim〃You　kin　just　gamble　that　mine　is。〃

John〃O；　that's　the　way　you　fellers　ought　to　think　an'