all roads lead to calvary-第58章

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g　up　to　dry；　beneath　which　dirty　children　played；　while　dirty　women　scolded。　　Filth　and　desolation　all　around。　　Shattered　farmsteads　half　buried　in　the　mud；　shattered　gardens　trampled　into　mud。　　A　weary　land　of　foulness；　breeding　foulness；　tangled　wire　the　only　harvest　of　the　fields；　mile　after　mile　of　gaping　holes；　filled　with　muddy　water；　stinking　carcases　of　dead　horses；　birds　of　prey　clinging　to　broken　fences；　flapping　their　great　wings。

A　land　where　man　died；　and　vermin　increased　and　multiplied。　　Vermin　on　your　body；　vermin　in　your　head；　vermin　in　your　food；　vermin　waiting　for　you　in　your　bed；　vermin　the　only　thing　that　throve；　the　only　thing　that　looked　at　you　with　bright　eyes；　vermin　the　only　thing　to　which　the　joy　of　life　had　still　been　left。

Joan　had　found　a　liking　gradually　growing　up　in　her　for　the　quick…　moving；　curt…tongued　doctor。　　She　had　dismissed　him　at　first　as　a　mere　butcher：　　his　brutal　haste；　his　indifference　apparently　to　the　suffering　he　was　causing；　his　great；　strong；　hairy　hands；　with　their　squat　fingers；　his　cold　grey　eyes。　　But　she　learnt　as　time　went　by；　that　his　callousness　was　a　thing　that　he　put　on　at　the　same　time　that　he　tied　his　white　apron　round　his　waist；　and　rolled　up　his　sleeves。

She　was　resting；　after　a　morning　of　grim　work；　on　a　bench　outside　the　hospital；　struggling　with　clenched；　quivering　hands　against　a　craving　to　fling　herself　upon　the　ground　and　sob。　　And　he　had　found　her　there；　and　had　sat　down　beside　her。

〃So　you　wanted　to　see　it　with　your　own　eyes；〃　he　said。　　He　laid　his　hand　upon　her　shoulder；　and　she　had　some　difficulty　in　not　catching　hold　of　him　and　clinging　to　him。　　She　was　feeling　absurdly　womanish　just　at　that　moment。

〃Yes；〃　she　answered。　　〃And　I'm　glad　that　I　did　it；〃　she　added；　defiantly。

〃So　am　I；〃　he　said。　　〃Tell　your　children　what　you　have　seen。　　Tell　other　women。〃

〃It's　you　women　that　make　war；〃　he　continued。　　〃Oh；　I　don't　mean　that　you　do　it　on　purpose；　but　it's　in　your　blood。　　It　comes　from　the　days　when　to　live　it　was　needful　to　kill。　　When　a　man　who　was　swift　and　strong　to　kill　was　the　only　thing　that　could　save　a　woman　and　her　brood。　　Every　other　man　that　crept　towards　them　through　the　grass　was　an　enemy；　and　her　only　hope　was　that　her　man　might　kill　him；　while　she　watched　and　waited。　　And　later　came　the　tribe；　and　instead　of　the　one　man　creeping　through　the　grass；　the　everlasting　warfare　was　against　all　other　tribes。　　So　you　loved　only　the　men　ever　ready　and　willing　to　fight；　lest　you　and　your　children　should　be　carried　into　slavery：　　then　it　was　the　only　way。　　You　brought　up　your　boys　to　be　fighters。　　You　told　them　stories　of　their　gallant　sires。　　You　sang　to　them　the　songs　of　battle：　　the　glory　of　killing　and　of　conquering。　　You　have　never　unlearnt　the　lesson。　　Man　has　learnt　comradeshipwould　have　travelled　further　but　for　you。　　But　woman　is　still　primitive。　　She　would　still　have　her　man　the　hater　and　the　killer。　　To　the　woman　the　world　has　never　changed。〃

〃Tell　the　other　women；〃　he　said。　　〃Open　their　eyes。　　Tell　them　of　their　sons　that　you　have　seen　dead　and　dying　in　the　foolish　quarrel　for　which　there　was　no　need。　　Tell　them　of　the　foulness；　of　the　cruelty；　of　the　senselessness　of　it　all。　　Set　the　women　against　War。　　That　is　the　only　way　to　end　it。〃

It　was　a　morning　or　two　later　that；　knocking　at　the　door　of　her　loft；　he　asked　her　if　she　would　care　to　come　with　him　to　the　trenches。　　He　had　brought　an　outfit　for　her　which　he　handed　to　her　with　a　grin。　　She　had　followed　Folk's　advice　and　had　cut　her　hair；　and　when　she　appeared　before　him　for　inspection　in　trousers　and　overcoat；　the　collar　turned　up　about　her　neck；　and　reaching　to　her　helmet；　he　had　laughingly　pronounced　the　experiment　safe。

A　motor　carried　them　to　where　the　road　ended；　and　from　there；　a　little　one…horse　ambulance　took　them　on　to　almost　the　last　trees　of　the　forest。　　There　was　no　life　to　be　seen　anywhere。　　During　the　last　mile；　they　had　passed　through　a　continuous　double　line　of　graves；　here　and　there　a　group　of　tiny　crosses　keeping　one　another　company；　others　standing　singly；　looking　strangely　lonesome　amid　the　torn…up　earth　and　shattered　trees。　　But　even　these　had　ceased。　Death　itself　seemed　to　have　been　frightened　away　from　this　terror…　haunted　desert。

Looking　down；　she　could　see　thin　wreaths　of　smoke；　rising　from　the　ground。　　From　underneath　her　feet　there　came　a　low；　faint；　ceaseless　murmur。

〃Quick；〃　said　the　doctor。　　He　pushed　her　in　front　of　him；　and　she　almost　fell　down　a　flight　of　mud…covered　steps　that　led　into　the　earth。　　She　found　herself　in　a　long；　low　gallery；　lighted　by　a　dim　oil　lamp；　suspended　from　the　blackened　roof。　　A　shelf　ran　along　one　side　of　it；　covered　with　straw。　　Three　men　lay　there。　　The　straw　was　soaked　with　their　blood。　　They　had　been　brought　in　the　night　before　by　the　stretcher…bearers。　　A　young　surgeon　was　rearranging　their　splints　and　bandages；　and　redressing　their　wounds。　　They　would　lie　there　for　another　hour　or　so；　and　then　start　for　their　twenty　kilometre　drive　over　shell…ridden　roads　to　one　or　another　of　the　great　hospitals　at　the　base。　　While　she　was　there；　two　more　cases　were　brought　in。　　The　doctor　gave　but　a　glance　at　the　first　one　and　then　made　a　sign；　and　the　bearers　passed　on　with　him　to　the　further　end　of　the　gallery。　　He　seemed　to　understand；　for　he　gave　a　low；　despairing　cry　and　the　tears　sprang　to　his　eyes。　　He　was　but　a　boy。　　The　other　had　a　foot　torn　off。　　One　of　the　orderlies　gave　him　two　round　pieces　of　wood　to　hold　in　his　hands　while　the　young　surgeon　cut　away　the　hanging　flesh　and　bound　up　the　stump。

The　doctor　had　been　whispering　to　one　of　the　bearers。　　He　had　the　face　of　an　old　man；　but　his　shoulders　were　broad　and　he　looked　sturdy。　　He　nodded；　and　beckoned　Joan　to　follow　him　up　the　slippery　steps。

〃It　is　breakfast　time；〃　he　explained；　as　they　emerged　into　the　air。　〃We　leave　each　other　alone　for　half　an　houreven　the　snipers。　　But　we　must　be　careful。〃　　She　followed　in　his　footsteps；　stooping　so　low　that　her　hands　could　have　touched　the　ground。　　They　had　to　be　sure　that　they　did　not　step　off　the　narrow　track　marked　with　white　stones；　lest　they　should　be　drowned　in　the　mud。　　They　passed　the　head　of　a　dead　horse。　　It　looked　as　if　it　had　been　cut　off　and　laid　there；　the　body　was　below　it　in　the　mud。

They　spoke　in　whispers；　and　Joan　at　first　had　made　an　effort　to　disguise　her　voice。　　But　her　conductor　had　smiled。　　〃They　shall　be　called　the　brothers　and　the　sisters　of　the　Lord；〃　he　had　said。　〃Mademoiselle　is　brave　for　her　Brothers'　sake。〃　　He　was　a　priest。　There　were　many　priests　among　the　stretcher…bearers。

Crouching　close　to　the　ground；　behind　the　spreading　roots　of　a　giant　oak；　she　raised　her　eyes。　　Before　her　lay　a　sea　of　smooth；　soft　mud　nearly　a　mile　wide。　　From　the　centre　rose　a　solitary　tree；　from　which　all　had　been　shot　away　but　two　bare　branches　like　outstretched　arms　above　the　silence。　　Beyond；　the　hills　rose　again。　There　was　something　unearthly　in　the　silence　that　seemed　to　brood　above　that　sea　of　mud。　　The　old　priest　told　her　of　the　living　men；　French　and　German；　who　had　stood　there　day　and　night　sunk　in　it　up　to　their　waists；　screaming　hour　after　hour；　and　waving　their　arms；　sinking　into　it　lower　and　lower；　none　able　to　help　them：　　until　at　last　only　their　screaming　heads　were　left；　and　after　a　time　these；　too；　would　disappear：　　and　the　silence　come　again。

She　saw　the　ditches；　like　long　graves　dug　for　the　living；　where　the　weary；　listless　men　stood　knee…deep　in　mud；　hoping　for　wounds　that　would　relieve　them　from　the　ghastly　monotony　of　their　existence；　the　holes　of　muddy　water　where　the　dead　things　lay；　to　which　they　crept　out　in　the　night　to　wash　a　little　of　the　filth　from　their　clammy　bodies　and　their　stinking　clothes；　the　holes　dug　out　of　the　mud　in　which　they　ate　and　slept　and　lived　year　after　year：　　till　brain　and　heart　and　soul　seemed　to　have　died　out　of　them；　and　they　remembered　with　an　effort　that　they　once　were　men。


After　a　time；　the　care　of　the　convalescents　passed　almost　entirely　into　Joan's　hands；　Madame　Lelanne　being　told　off　to　assist　her。　　By　dint　of　much　persistence　she　had　succeeded　in　getting　the　leaky　roof　repaired；　and　in　place　of　the　smoky　stove　that　had　long　be