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第18章

the lesson of the master-第18章

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The Master's face was wonderful。  〃Tell me what?〃



〃That he mentioned it to me this afternoon?〃



〃My dear fellow; I don't remember。  We've been in the midst of

people。  I'm sorry; in that case; that I lose the pleasure; myself;

of announcing to you a fact that touches me so nearly。  It IS a

fact; strange as it may appear。  It has only just become one。

Isn't it ridiculous?〃  St。 George made this speech without

confusion; but on the other hand; so far as our friend could judge;

without latent impudence。  It struck his interlocutor that; to talk

so comfortably and coolly; he must simply have forgotten what had

passed between them。  His next words; however; showed he hadn't;

and they produced; as an appeal to Paul's own memory; an effect

which would have been ludicrous if it hadn't been cruel。  〃Do you

recall the talk we had at my house that night; into which Miss

Fancourt's name entered?  I've often thought of it since。〃



〃Yes; no wonder you said what you did〃 … Paul was careful to meet

his eyes。



〃In the light of the present occasion?  Ah but there was no light

then。  How could I have foreseen this hour?〃



〃Didn't you think it probable?〃



〃Upon my honour; no;〃 said Henry St。 George。  〃Certainly I owe you

that assurance。  Think how my situation has changed。〃



〃I see … I see;〃 our young man murmured。



His companion went on as if; now that the subject had been

broached; he was; as a person of imagination and tact; quite ready

to give every satisfaction … being both by his genius and his

method so able to enter into everything another might feel。  〃But

it's not only that; for honestly; at my age; I never dreamed … a

widower with big boys and with so little else!  It has turned out

differently from anything one could have dreamed; and I'm fortunate

beyond all measure。  She has been so free; and yet she consents。

Better than any one else perhaps … for I remember how you liked her

before you went away; and how she liked you … you can intelligently

congratulate me。〃



〃She has been so free!〃  Those words made a great impression on

Paul Overt; and he almost writhed under that irony in them as to

which it so little mattered whether it was designed or casual。  Of

course she had been free; and appreciably perhaps by his own act;

for wasn't the Master's allusion to her having liked him a part of

the irony too?  〃I thought that by your theory you disapproved of a

writer's marrying。〃



〃Surely … surely。  But you don't call me a writer?〃



〃You ought to be ashamed;〃 said Paul。



〃Ashamed of marrying again?〃



〃I won't say that … but ashamed of your reasons。〃



The elder man beautifully smiled。  〃You must let me judge of them;

my good friend。〃



〃Yes; why not?  For you judged wonderfully of mine。〃



The tone of these words appeared suddenly; for St。 George; to

suggest the unsuspected。  He stared as if divining a bitterness。

〃Don't you think I've been straight?〃



〃You might have told me at the time perhaps。〃



〃My dear fellow; when I say I couldn't pierce futurity …!〃



〃I mean afterwards。〃



The Master wondered。  〃After my wife's death?〃



〃When this idea came to you。〃



〃Ah never; never!  I wanted to save you; rare and precious as you

are。〃



Poor Overt looked hard at him。  〃Are you marrying Miss Fancourt to

save me?〃



〃Not absolutely; but it adds to the pleasure。  I shall be the

making of you;〃 St。 George smiled。  〃I was greatly struck; after

our talk; with the brave devoted way you quitted the country; and

still more perhaps with your force of character in remaining

abroad。  You're very strong … you're wonderfully strong。〃



Paul tried to sound his shining eyes; the strange thing was that he

seemed sincere … not a mocking fiend。  He turned away; and as he

did so heard the Master say something about his giving them all the

proof; being the joy of his old age。  He faced him again; taking

another look。  〃Do you mean to say you've stopped writing?〃



〃My dear fellow; of course I have。  It's too late。  Didn't I tell

you?〃



〃I can't believe it!〃



〃Of course you can't … with your own talent!  No; no; for the rest

of my life I shall only read YOU。〃



〃Does she know that … Miss Fancourt?〃



〃She will … she will。〃  Did he mean this; our young man wondered;

as a covert intimation that the assistance he should derive from

that young lady's fortune; moderate as it was; would make the

difference of putting it in his power to cease to work ungratefully

an exhausted vein?  Somehow; standing there in the ripeness of his

successful manhood; he didn't suggest that any of his veins were

exhausted。  〃Don't you remember the moral I offered myself to you

that night as pointing?〃 St。 George continued。  〃Consider at any

rate the warning I am at present。〃



This was too much … he WAS the mocking fiend。  Paul turned from him

with a mere nod for goodnight and the sense in a sore heart that he

might come back to him and his easy grace; his fine way of

arranging things; some time in the far future; but couldn't

fraternise with him now。  It was necessary to his soreness to

believe for the hour in the intensity of his grievance … all the

more cruel for its not being a legal one。  It was doubtless in the

attitude of hugging this wrong that he descended the stairs without

taking leave of Miss Fancourt; who hadn't been in view at the

moment he quitted the room。  He was glad to get out into the honest

dusky unsophisticating night; to move fast; to take his way home on

foot。  He walked a long time; going astray; paying no attention。

He was thinking of too many other things。  His steps recovered

their direction; however; and at the end of an hour he found

himself before his door in the small inexpensive empty street。  He

lingered; questioning himself still before going in; with nothing

around and above him but moonless blackness; a bad lamp or two and

a few far…away dim stars。  To these last faint features he raised

his eyes; he had been saying to himself that he should have been

〃sold〃 indeed; diabolically sold; if now; on his new foundation; at

the end of a year; St。 George were to put forth something of his

prime quality … something of the type of 〃Shadowmere〃 and finer

than his finest。  Greatly as he admired his talent Paul literally

hoped such an incident wouldn't occur; it seemed to him just then

that he shouldn't be able to bear it。  His late adviser's words

were still in his ears … 〃You're very strong; wonderfully strong。〃

Was he really?  Certainly he would have to be; and it might a

little serve for revenge。  IS he? the reader may ask in turn; if

his interest has followed the perplexed young man so far。  The best

answer to that perhaps is that he's doing his best; but that it's

too soon to say。  When the new book came out in the autumn Mr。 and

Mrs。 St。 George found it really magnificent。  The former still has

published nothing but Paul doesn't even yet feel safe。  I may say

for him; however; that if this event were to occur he would really

be the very first to appreciate it:  which is perhaps a proof that

the Master was essentially right and that Nature had dedicated him

to intellectual; not to personal passion。











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