the dust-第14章

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tiny　of　anyone。　And　his　notion　involved　not　slight　interference　with　advice　or　suggestion　or　momentarily　extended　helping　hand；　but　radical　change　of　the　whole　current　of　destiny。　Also；　he　appreciated　how　difficult　it　is　for　a　man　to　do　anything　for　a　young　womananything　that　would　not　harm　more　than　it　would　help。　　Only　one　thing　seemed　clear　to　himthe　〃clever　child〃　ought　to　have　a　chance。

He　went　to　see　Josephine　after　dinner　that　night　His　own　house；　while　richly　and　showily　furnished；　as　became　his　means　and　station；　seemedand　indeed　was　merely　an　example　of　simple；　old…fashioned　〃solid　comfort〃　in　comparison　with　the　Burroughs　palace。　He　had　never　liked；　but；　being　a　true　New　Yorker；　had　greatly　admired　the　splendor　of　that　palace；　its　costly　art　junk；　its　rotten　old　tapestries；　its　unlovely　genuine　antiques；　its　room　after　room　of　tasteless　magnificence；　suggesting　a　museum；　or　rather　the　combination　home　and　salesroom　of　an　art　dealer。　　This　evening　he　found　himself　curious；　critical；　disposed　to　license　a　long…　suppressed　sense　of　humor。　　While　he　was　waiting　for　Josephine　to　come　down　to　the　small　salon　into　which　he　had　been　shown；　her　older　sister　drifted　in；　on　the　way　to　a　late　dinner　and　ball。　　She　eyed　him　admiringly　from　head　to　foot。

〃You've　SUCH　an　air；　Fred；〃　said　she。　　〃You　should　hear　the　butler　on　the　subject　of　you。　　He　says　that　of　all　the　men　who　come　to　the　house　you　are　most　the　man　of　the　world。　　He　says　he　could　tell　it　by　the　way　you　walk　in　and　take　off　your　hat　and　coat　and　throw　them　at　him。〃

Norman　laughed　and　said；　〃I　didn't　know。　　I　must　stop　that。〃

〃Don't！〃　cried　Mrs。　Bellowes。　　〃You'll　break　his　heart。　　He　adores　it。　　You　know；　servants　dearly　love　to　be　treated　as　servants。　　Anyone　who　thinks　the　world　loves　equality　knows　very　little　about　human　nature。　Most　people　love　to　look　up；　just　as　most　women　love　to　be　ruled。　　No；　you　must　continue　to　be　the　master；　the　man　of　the　world；　Fred。〃

She　was　busy　with　her　gorgeous　and　trailing　wraps　and　with　her　cigarette　or　she　would　have　seen　his　confusion。　　He　was　recalling　his　scene　with　the　typewriter　girl。　　Not　much　of　the　man　of　the　world；　then　and　there；　certainly。　　What　a　grotesque　performance　for　a　man　of　his　position；　for　a　serious　man　of　any　kind！　　And　how　came　he　to　permit　such　a　person　to　mimic　Josephine　Burroughs；　a　lady；　the　woman　to　whom　he　was　engaged？　In　these　proud　and　pretentious　surroundings　he　felt　contemptibly　guiltyand　dazed　wonder　at　his　own　inexplicable　folly　and　weakness。

Mrs。　Bellowes　departed　before　Josephine　came　down。　So　there　was　no　relief　for　his　embarrassment。　　He　saw　that　she　too　felt　constrained。　　Instead　of　meeting　him　half　way　in　embrace　and　kiss；　as　she　usually　did；　she　threw　him　a　kiss　and　pretended　to　be　busy　lighting　a　cigarette　and　arranging　the　shades　of　the　table　lamp。　〃Well；　I　saw　your　‘poor　little　creature；'　〃　she　began。　She　was　splendidly　direct　in　all　her　dealings；　after　the　manner　of　people　who　have　never　had　to　make　their　own　wayto　cajole　or　conciliate　or　dread　the　consequences　of　frankness。

〃I　told　you　you'd　not　find　her　interesting。〃

〃Oh；　she　was　a　nice　little　girl；〃　replied　Josephine　with　elaborate　graciousnessand　Norman；　the　〃take　off〃　fresh　in　his　mind；　was　acutely　critical　of　her　manner；　of　her　mannerisms。　　〃Of　course；〃　she　went　on；　〃one　does　not　expect　much　of　people　of　that　class。　　But　I　thought　her　unusually　well…manneredand　quite　clean。〃

〃Tetlow　makes　'em　clean　up；〃　said　Norman；　a　gleam　of　sarcasm　in　his　careless　glance　and　tone。　　And　into　his　nostrils　stole　an　odor　of　freshness　and　health　and　youth；　the　pure；　sweet　odor　that　is　the　base　of　all　the　natural　perfumes。　　It　startled　him；　his　vivid　memory　of　a　feature　of　her　which　he　had　not　been　until　now　aware　that　he　had　ever　noted。

〃I　offered　her　some　work；〃　continued　Josephine；　〃but　I　guess　you　keep　her　too　busy　down　there　for　her　to　do　anything　else。〃

〃Probably；〃　said　Norman。　　〃Why　do　you　sit　on　the　other　side　of　the　room？〃

〃Oh；　I　don't　know；〃　laughed　Josephine。　　〃I　feel　queer　to…night。　　And　it　seems　to　me　you're　queer；　too。〃

〃I？　　Perhaps　rather　tired；　dearthat's　all。〃

〃Did　you　and　Miss　Hallowell　work　hard　to…day？〃

〃Oh；　bother　Miss　Hallowell。　　Let's　talk　about　ourselves。〃　And　he　drew　her　to　the　sofa　at　one　end　of　the　big　fireplace。　　〃I　wish　we　hadn't　set　the　wedding　so　far　off。〃　　And　suddenly　he　found　himself　wondering　whether　that　remark　had　been　prompted　by　eagerness　a　lover's　eagernessor　by　impatience　to　have　the　business　over　and　settled。

〃You　don't　act　a　bit　natural　to…night；　Fred。　　You　touch　me　as　if　I　were　a　stranger。〃

〃I　like　that！〃　mocked　he。　　〃A　stranger　hold　your　hand　like　this？andkiss　youlike　this？〃

She　drew　away；　suddenly　laid　her　hands　on　his　shoulders；　kissed　him　upon　the　lips　passionately；　then　looked　into　his　eyes。　　〃DO　you　love　me；　Fred？REALLY？〃

〃Why　so　earnest？〃

〃You've　had　a　great　deal　of　experience？〃

〃More　or　less。〃

〃Have　you　ever　loved　any　woman　as　you　love　me？〃

〃I've　never　loved　any　woman　but　you。　　I　never　before　wanted　to　marry　a　woman。〃

〃But　you　may　be　doing　it　becausewell；　you　might　be　tired　and　want　to　settle　down。〃

〃Do　you　believe　that？〃

〃No；　I　don't。　　But　I　want　to　hear　you　say　it　isn't　so。〃

〃Wellit　isn't　so。　　Are　you　satisfied？〃

〃I'm　frightfully　jealous　of　you；　Fred。〃

〃What　a　waste　of　time！〃

〃I've　got　something　to　confesssomething　I'm　ashamed　of。〃

〃Don't　confess；〃　cried　he；　laughing　but　showing　that　he　meant　it。　　〃Justdon't　be　wicked　again　That's　much　better　than　confession。〃

〃But　I　must　confess；〃　insisted　she。　　〃I　had　evil


｛illust。　caption　=　〃　‘Would　you　like　to　think　I　was　marrying　you　for　what　you　have？or　for　any　other　reason　whatever　but　for　what　you　are？'　〃｝


thoughts　evil　suspicions　about　you。　　I've　had　them　all　dayuntil　you　came。　　As　soon　as　I　saw　you　I　felt　bowed　into　the　dust。　　A　man　like　you；　doing　anything　so　vulgar　as　I　suspected　you　ofoh；　dearest；　I'm　SO　ashamed！〃

He　put　his　arms　round　her　and　drew　her　to　his　shoulder。　　And　the　scene　of　mimicry　in　his　office　flashed　into　his　mind；　and　the　blood　burned　in　his　cheeks。　　But　he　had　no　such　access　of　insanity　as　to　entertain　the　idea　of　confession。

〃It　was　that　typewriter　girl；〃　continued　Josephine。　She　drew　away　again　and　once　more　searched　his　face。　〃You　told　me　she　was　homely。〃

〃Not　exactly　that。〃

〃Insignificant　then。〃

〃Isn't　she？〃

〃Yesin　a　way；〃　said　Josephine；　the　condescending　note　in　her　voice　againand　in　his　mind　Miss　Hallowell's　clever　burlesque　of　that　note。　　〃But；　in　another　way　　Men　are　different　from　women。　　Now　Ia　woman　of　my　sortcouldn't　stoop　to　a　man　of　her　class。　　But　men　seem　not　to　feel　that　way。〃

〃No；〃　said　he；　irritated。　　〃They've　the　courage　to　take　what　they　want　wherever　they　find　it。　　A　man　will　take　gold　out　of　the　dirt；　because　gold　is　always　gold。　But　a　woman　waits　until　she　can　get　it　at　a　fashionable　jeweler's；　and　makes　sure　it's　made　up　in　a　fashionable　way。　　I　don't　like　to　hear　YOU　say　those　things。〃

Her　eyes　flashed。　　〃Then　you　DO　like　that　Hallowell　girl！〃　she　criedand　never　before　had　her　voice　jarred　upon　him。

〃That　Hallowell　girl　has　nothing　to　do　with　this；〃　he　rejoined。　　〃I　like　to　feel　that　you　really　love　me　that　you'd　have　taken　me　wherever　you　happened　to　find　meand　that　you'd　stick　to　me　no　matter　how　far　I　might　drop。〃

〃I　would！　　I　would！〃　she　cried；　tears　in　her　eyes。　〃Oh；　I　didn't　mean　that；　Fred。　　You　know　I　didn't　don't　you？〃

She　tried　to　put　her　arms　round　his　neck；　but　he　took　her　hands　and　held　them。　　〃Would　you　like　to　think　I　was　marrying　you　for　what　you　have？or　for　any　other　reason　whatever　but　for　what　you　are？〃

It　being　once　more　a　question　of　her　own　sex；　the　obstinate　line　appeared　round　her　mouth。　　〃But；　Fred；　I'd　not　be　ME；　if　I　werea　working　girl；〃　she　replied。

〃You　might　be　something　even　better　if　you　were；〃　retorted　he　coldly。　　〃The　only　qualities　I　don't　like　about　you　are　the　surface　qualities　that　have　been　plated　on　in　these　surroundings。　　And　if　I　thought　it　was　anything　but　just　you　that　I　was　marrying；　I'd　lose　no　time　about　leaving　you。　　I'd　not　let　myself　degrade　myself。〃

〃Fredthat　toneand　don'tplease　don't　look　at　me　like　that！〃　she　begg