worldly ways and byways-第2章
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the gay hostesses and graceful athletes of to…day) not for the
better。
It is just in the subtle quality of charm that the women of the
last ten years have fallen away from their elder sisters。 They
have been carried along by a love of sport; and by the set of
fashion's tide; not stopping to ask themselves whither they are
floating。 They do not realize all the importance of their acts nor
the true meaning of their metamorphosis。
The dear creatures should be content; for they have at last escaped
from the bondage of ages; have broken their chains; and vaulted
over their prison walls。 〃Lords and masters〃 have gradually become
very humble and obedient servants; and the 〃love; honour; and obey〃
of the marriage service might now more logically be spoken by the
man; on the lips of the women of to…day it is but a graceful 〃FACON
DE PARLER;〃 and holds only those who choose to be bound。
It is not my intention to rail against the short…comings of the
day。 That ungrateful task I leave to sterner moralists; and
hopeful souls who naively imagine they can stem the current of an
epoch with the barrier of their eloquence; or sweep back an ocean
of innovations by their logic。 I should like; however; to ask my
sisters one question: Are they quite sure that women gain by these
changes? Do they imagine; these 〃sporty〃 young females in short…
cut skirts and mannish shirts and ties; that it is seductive to a
lover; or a husband to see his idol in a violent perspiration; her
draggled hair blowing across a sunburned face; panting up a long
hill in front of him on a bicycle; frantic at having lost her race?
Shade of gentle William! who said
A woman moved; is like a fountain troubled; …
Muddy; ill…seeming; thick; bereft of beauty。
And while it is so; none so dry or thirsty
Will deign to sip or touch one drop of it。
Is the modern girl under the impression that men will be contented
with poor imitations of themselves; to share their homes and be the
mothers of their children? She is throwing away the substance for
the shadow!
The moment women step out from the sanctuary of their homes; the
glamour that girlhood or maternity has thrown around them cast
aside; that moment will they cease to rule mankind。 Women may
agitate until they have obtained political recognition; but will
awake from their foolish dream of power; realizing too late what
they have sacrificed to obtain it; that the price has been very
heavy; and the fruit of their struggles bitter on their lips。
There are few men; I imagine; of my generation to whom the words
〃home〃 and 〃mother〃 have not a penetrating charm; who do not look
back with softened heart and tender thoughts to fireside scenes of
evening readings and twilight talks at a mother's knee; realizing
that the best in their natures owes its growth to these influences。
I sometimes look about me and wonder what the word 〃mother〃 will
mean later; to modern little boys。 It will evoke; I fear; a
confused remembrance of some centaur…like being; half woman; half
wheel; or as it did to neglected little Rawdon Crawley; the vision
of a radiant creature in gauze and jewels; driving away to endless
FETES … FETES followed by long mornings; when he was told not to
make any noise; or play too loudly; 〃as poor mamma is resting。〃
What other memories can the 〃successful〃 woman of to…day hope to
leave in the minds of her children? If the child remembers his
mother in this way; will not the man who has known and perhaps
loved her; feel the same sensation of empty futility when her name
is mentioned?
The woman who proposes a game of cards to a youth who comes to pass
an hour in her society; can hardly expect him to carry away a
particularly tender memory of her as he leaves the house。 The girl
who has rowed; ridden; or raced at a man's side for days; with the
object of getting the better of him at some sport or pastime;
cannot reasonably hope to be connected in his thoughts with ideas
more tender or more elevated than 〃odds〃 or 〃handicaps;〃 with an
undercurrent of pique if his unsexed companion has 〃downed〃 him
successfully。
What man; unless he be singularly dissolute or unfortunate; but
turns his steps; when he can; towards some dainty parlor where he
is sure of finding a smiling; soft…voiced woman; whose welcome he
knows will soothe his irritated nerves and restore the even balance
of his temper; whose charm will work its subtle way into his
troubled spirit? The wife he loves; or the friend he admires and
respects; will do more for him in one such quiet hour when two
minds commune; coming closer to the real man; and moving him to
braver efforts; and nobler aims; than all the beauties and 〃sporty〃
acquaintances of a lifetime。 No matter what a man's education or
taste is; none are insensible to such an atmosphere or to the grace
and witchery a woman can lend to the simplest surroundings。 She
need not be beautiful or brilliant to hold him in lifelong
allegiance; if she but possess this magnetism。
Madame Recamier was a beautiful; but not a brilliant woman; yet she
held men her slaves for years。 To know her was to fall under her
charm; and to feel it once was to remain her adorer for life。 She
will go down to history as the type of a fascinating woman。 Being
asked once by an acquaintance what spell she worked on mankind that
enabled her to hold them for ever at her feet; she laughingly
answered:
〃I have always found two words sufficient。 When a visitor comes
into my salon; I say; 'ENFIN!' and when he gets up to go away; I
say; 'DEJA!' 〃
〃What is this wonderful 'charm' he is writing about?〃 I hear some
sprightly maiden inquire as she reads these lines。 My dear young
lady; if you ask the question; you have judged yourself and been
found wanting。 But to satisfy you as far as I can; I will try and
define it … not by telling you what it is; that is beyond my power
… but by negatives; the only way in which subtle subjects can be
approached。
A woman of charm is never flustered and never DISTRAITE。 She talks
little; and rarely of herself; remembering that bores are persons
who insist on talking about themselves。 She does not break the
thread of a conversation by irrelevant questions or confabulate in
an undertone with the servants。 No one of her guests receives more
of her attention than another and none are neglected。 She offers
to each one who speaks the homage of her entire attention。 She
never makes an effort to be brilliant or entertain with her wit。
She is far too clever for that。 Neither does she volunteer
information nor converse about her troubles or her ailments; nor
wander off into details about people you do not know。
She is all things … to each man she likes; in the best sense of
that phrase; appreciating his qualities; stimulating him to better
things。
… for his gayer hours
She has a voice of gladness and a smile and eloquence of beauty;
and she glides
Into his darker musings with a mild and healing sympathy that
steals away
Their sharpness ere he is aware。
CHAPTER 2 … The Moth and the Star
THE truth of the saying that 〃it is always the unexpected that
happens;〃 receives in this country a confirmation from an unlooked…
for quarter; as does the fact of human nature being always;
discouragingly; the same in spite of varied surroundings。 This
sounds like a paradox; but is an exceedingly simple statement
easily proved。
That the great mass of Americans; drawn as they are from such
varied sources; should take any interest in the comings and goings
or social doings of a small set of wealthy and fashionable people;
is certainly an unexpected development。 That to read of the
amusements and home life of a clique of people with whom they have
littl