worldly ways and byways-第17章

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more　each　year　from　the　life　of　the　country；　and　affect　to　smile　at　

any　of　their　number　who　honestly　wish　to　be　of　service　to　the　

nation。　　They；　like　the　French　aristocracy；　are　perfectly　willing；　

even　anxious；　to　fill　agreeable　diplomatic　posts　at　first…class　

foreign　capitals；　and　are　naively　astonished　when　their　offers　of　

service　are　not　accepted　with　gratitude　by　the　authorities　in　

Washington。　　But　let　a　husband　propose　to　his　better　half　some　

humble　position　in　the　machinery　of　our　government；　and　see　what　

the　lady's　answer　will　be。



The　opinion　prevails　among　a　large　class　of　our　wealthy　and　

cultivated　people；　that　to　go　into　public　life　is　to　descend　to　

duties　beneath　them。　　They　judge　the　men　who　occupy　such　positions　

with　insulting　severity；　classing　them　in　their　minds　as　corrupt　

and　self…seeking；　than　which　nothing　can　be　more　childish　or　more　

imbecile。　　Any　observer　who　has　lived　in　the　different　grades　of　

society　will　quickly　renounce　the　puerile　idea　that　sporting　or　

intellectual　pursuits　are　alone　worthy　of　a　gentleman's　attention。　　

This　very　political　life；　which　appears　unworthy　of　their　attention　

to　so　many　men；　is；　in　reality；　the　great　field　where　the　nations　

of　the　world　fight　out　their　differences；　where　the　seed　is　sown　

that　will　ripen　later　into　vast　crops　of　truth　and　justice。　　It　is　

（if　rightly　regarded　and　honestly　followed）　the　battle…ground　where　

man's　highest　qualities　are　put　to　their　noblest　use　…　that　of　

working　for　the　happiness　of　others。









CHAPTER　14　…　The　Small　Summer　Hotel





WE　certainly　are　the　most　eccentric　race　on　the　surface　of　the　

globe　and　ought　to　be　a　delight　to　the　soul　of　an　explorer；　so　full　

is　our　civilization　of　contradictions；　unexplained　habits　and　

curious　customs。　　It　is　quite　unnecessary　for　the　inquisitive　

gentlemen　who　pass　their　time　prying　into　other　people's　affairs　

and　then　returning　home　to　write　books　about　their　discoveries；　to　

risk　their　lives　and　digestions　in　long　journeys　into　Central　

Africa　or　to　the　frozen　zones；　while　so　much　good　material　lies　

ready　to　their　hands　in　our　own　land。　　The　habits　of　the　〃natives〃　

in　New　England　alone　might　occupy　an　active　mind　indefinitely；　

offering　as　interesting　problems　as　any　to　be　solved　by　penetrating　

Central　Asia　or　visiting　the　man…eating　tribes　of　Australia。



Perhaps　one　of　our　scientific　celebrities；　before　undertaking　his　

next　long　voyage；　will　find　time　to　make　observations　at　home　and　

collect　sufficient　data　to　answer　some　questions　that　have　long　

puzzled　my　unscientific　brain。　　He　would　be　doing　good　work。　　Fame　

and　honors　await　the　man　who　can　explain　why；　for　instance；　sane　

Americans　of　the　better　class；　with　money　enough　to　choose　their　

surroundings；　should　pass　so　much　of　their　time　in　hotels　and　

boarding　houses。　　There　must　be　a　reason　for　the　vogue　of　these　

retreats　…　every　action　has　a　cause；　however　remote。　　I　shall　await　

with　the　deepest　interest　a　paper　on　this　subject　from　one　of　our　

great　explorers；　untoward　circumstances　having　some　time　ago　forced　

me　to　pass　a　few　days　in　a　popular　establishment　of　this　class。



During　my　visit　I　amused　myself　by　observing　the　inmates　and　trying　

to　discover　why　they　had　come　there。　　So　far　as　I　could　find　out；　

the　greater　part　of　them　belonged　to　our　well…to…do　class；　and　when　

at　home　doubtless　lived　in　luxurious　houses　and　were　waited　on　by　

trained　servants。　　In　the　small　summer　hotel　where　I　met　them；　they　

were　living　in　dreary　little　ten　by　twelve　foot　rooms；　containing　

only　the　absolute　necessities　of　existence；　a　wash…stand；　a　bureau；　

two　chairs　and　a　bed。　　And　such　a　bed！　　One　mattress　about　four　

inches　thick　over　squeaking　slats；　cotton　sheets；　so　nicely　

calculated　to　the　size　of　the　bed　that　the　slightest　move　on　the　

part　of　the　sleeper　would　detach　them　from　their　moorings　and　undo　

the　housemaid's　work；　two　limp；　discouraged　pillows　that　had　

evidently　been　〃banting；〃　and　a　few　towels　a　foot　long　with　a　

surface　like　sand…paper；　completed　the　fittings　of　the　room。　　Baths　

were　unknown；　and　hot　water　was　a　luxury　distributed　sparingly　by　a　

capricious　handmaiden。　　It　is　only　fair　to　add　that　everything　in　

the　room　was　perfectly　clean；　as　was　the　coarse　table　linen　in　the　

dining　room。



The　meals　were　in　harmony　with　the　rooms　and　furniture；　consisting　

only　of　the　strict　necessities；　cooked　with　a　Spartan　disregard　for　

such　sybarite　foibles　as　seasoning　or　dressing。　　I　believe　there　

was　a　substantial　meal　somewhere　in　the　early　morning　hours；　but　I　

never　succeeded　in　getting　down　in　time　to　inspect　it。　　By　

successful　bribery；　I　induced　one　of　the　village　belles；　who　served　

at　table；　to　bring　a　cup　of　coffee　to　my　room。　　The　first　morning　

it　appeared　already　poured　out　in　the　cup；　with　sugar　and　cold　milk　

added　at　her　discretion。　　At　one　o'clock　a　dinner　was　served；　

consisting　of　soup　（occasionally）；　one　meat　dish　and　attendant　

vegetables；　a　meagre　dessert；　and　nothing　else。　　At　half…past　six　

there　was　an　equally　rudimentary　meal；　called　〃tea；〃　after　which　no　

further　food　was　distributed　to　the　inmates；　who　all；　however；　

seemed　perfectly　contented　with　this　arrangement。　　In　fact　they　

apparently　looked　on　the　act　of　eating　as　a　disagreeable　task；　to　

be　hurried　through　as　soon　as　possible　that　they　might　return　to　

their　aimless　rocking　and　chattering。



Instead　of　dinner　hour　being　the　feature　of　the　day；　uniting　people　

around　an　attractive　table；　and　attended　by　conversation；　and　the　

meal　lasting　long　enough　for　one's　food　to　be　properly　eaten；　it　

was　rushed　through　as　though　we　were　all　trying　to　catch　a　train。　　

Then；　when　the　meal　was　over；　the　boarders　relapsed　into　apathy　

again。



No　one　ever　called　this　hospitable　home　a　boarding…house；　for　the　

proprietor　was　furious　if　it　was　given　that　name。　　He　also　scorned　

the　idea　of　keeping　a　hotel。　　So　that　I　never　quite　understood　in　

what　relation　he　stood　toward　us。　　He　certainly　considered　himself　

our　host；　and　ignored　the　financial　side　of　the　question　severely。　　

In　order　not　to　hurt　his　feelings　by　speaking　to　him　of　money；　we　

were　obliged　to　get　our　bills　by　strategy　from　a　male　subordinate。　　

Mine　host　and　his　family　were　apparently　unaware　that　there　were　

people　under　their　roof　who　paid　them　for　board　and　lodging。　　We　

were　all　looked　upon　as　guests　and　〃entertained；〃　and　our　rights　

impartially　ignored。



Nothing；　I　find；　is　so　distinctive　of　New　England　as　this　graceful　

veiling　of　the　practical　side　of　life。　　The　landlady　always　

reminded　me；　by　her　manner；　of　Barrie's　description　of　the　bill…

sticker's　wife　who　〃cut〃　her　husband　when　she　chanced　to　meet　him　

〃professionally〃　engaged。　　As　a　result　of　this　extreme　detachment　

from　things　material；　the　house　ran　itself；　or　was　run　by　

incompetent　Irish　and　negro　〃help。〃　　There　were　no　bells　in　the　

rooms；　which　simplified　the　service；　and　nothing　could　be　ordered　

out　of　meal　hours。



The　material　defects　in　board　and　lodging　sink；　however；　into　

insignificance　before　the　moral　and　social　unpleasantness　of　an　

establishment　such　as　this。　　All　ages；　all　conditions；　and　all　

creeds　are　promiscuously　huddled　together。　　It　is　impossible　to　

choose　whom　one　shall　know　or　whom　avoid。　　A　horrible　burlesque　of　

family　life　is　enabled；　with　all　its　inconveniences　and　none　of　its　

sanctity。　　People　from　different　cities；　with　different　interests　

and　standards；　are　expected　to　〃chum〃　together　in　an　intimacy　that　

begins　with　the　eight　o'clock　breakfast　and　ends　only　when　all　

retire　for　the　night。　　No　privacy；　no　isolation　is　allowed。　　If　you　

take　a　book　and　begin　to　read　in　a　remote　corner　of　a　parlor　or　

piazza；　some　idle　matron　or　idiotic　girl　will　tranquilly　invade　

your　poor　little　bit　of　privacy　and　gabble　of　her　affairs　and　the　

day's　gossip。　　There　is　no　escape　unless　you　mount