worldly ways and byways-第15章

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connoisseurship。　　One　can　generally　detect　the　exact　stage　of　

evolution　such　a　lady　has　reached　by　the　bent　of　her　conversation；　

the　books　she　is　reading；　and；　last　but　not　least；　by　her　material　

surroundings；　no　outward　and　visible　signs　reflecting　inward　and　

spiritual　grace　so　clearly　as　the　objects　people　collect　around　

them　for　the　adornment　of　their　rooms；　or　the　way　in　which　those　

rooms　are　decorated。



A　few　years　ago；　when　a　young　man　and　his　bride　set　up　housekeeping　

on　their　own　account；　the　〃old　people〃　of　both　families　seized　the　

opportunity　to　unload　on　the　beginners　（under　the　pretence　of　

helping　them　along）　a　quantity　of　furniture　and　belongings　that　had　

（as　the　shopkeepers　say）　〃ceased　to　please〃　their　original　owners。　　

The　narrow　quarters　of　the　tyros　are　encumbered　by　ungainly　sofas　

and　arm…chairs；　most　probably　of　carved　rosewood。　　ETAGERES　OF　the　

same　lugubrious　material　grace　the　corners　of　their　tiny　drawing…

room；　the　bits　of　mirror　inserted　between　the　shelves　distorting　

the　image　of　the　owners　into　headless　or　limbless　phantoms。　　Half　

of　their　little　dining…room　is　filled　with　a　black…walnut　

sideboard；　ingeniously　contrived　to　take　up　as　much　space　as　

possible　and　hold　nothing；　its　graceless　top　adorned　with　a　stag's　

head　carved　in　wood　and　imitation　antlers。



The　novices　in　their　innocence　live　contented　amid　their　hideous　

surroundings　for　a　year　or　two；　when　the　wife　enters　her　second　

epoch；　which；　for　want　of　a　better　word；　we　will　call　the　Japanese　

period。　　The　grim　furniture　gradually　disappears　under　a　layer　of　

silk　and　gauze　draperies；　the　bare　walls　blossom　with　paper　

umbrellas；　fans　are　nailed　in　groups　promiscuously；　wherever　an　

empty　space　offends　her　eye。　　Bows　of　ribbon　are　attached　to　every　

possible　protuberance　of　the　furniture。　　Even　the　table　service　is　

not　spared。　　I　remember　dining　at　a　house　in　this　stage　of　its　

artistic　development；　where　the　marrow　bones　that　formed　one　course　

of　the　dinner　appeared　each　with　a　coquettish　little　bow…knot　of　

pink　ribbon　around　its　neck。



Once　launched　on　this　sea　of　adornment；　the　housewife　soon　loses　

her　bearings　and　decorates　indiscriminately。　　Her　old　evening　

dresses　serve　to　drape　the　mantelpieces；　and　she　passes　every　spare　

hour　embroidering；　braiding；　or　fringing　some　material　to　adorn　her　

rooms。　　At　Christmas　her　friends　contribute　specimens　of　their　

handiwork　to　the　collection。



The　view　of　other　houses　and　other　decorations　before　long　

introduces　the　worm　of　discontent　into　the　blossom　of　our　friend's　

contentment。　　The　fruit　of　her　labors　becomes　tasteless　on　her　

lips。　　As　the　finances　of　the　family　are　satisfactory；　the　re…

arrangement　of　the　parlor　floor　is　（at　her　suggestion）　confided　to　

a　firm　of　upholsterers；　who　make　a　clean　sweep　of　the　rosewood　and　

the　bow…knots；　and　retire；　after　some　months　of　labor；　leaving　the　

delighted　wife　in　possession　of　a　suite　of　rooms　glittering　with　

every　monstrosity　that　an　imaginative　tradesman；　spurred　on　by　

unlimited　credit；　could　devise。



The　wood　work　of　the　doors　and　mantels　is　an　intricate　puzzle　of　

inlaid　woods；　the　ceilings　are　panelled　and　painted　in　complicated　

designs。　　The　〃parlor〃　is　provided　with　a　complete　set　of　neat；　

old…gold　satin　furniture；　puffed　at　its　angles　with　peacock…colored　

plush。



The　monumental　folding　doors　between　the　long；　narrow　rooms　are　

draped　with　the　same　chaste　combination　of　stuffs。



The　dining…room　blazes　with　a　gold　and　purple　wall　paper；　set　off　

by　ebonized　wood　work　and　furniture。　　The　conscientious　contractor　

has　neglected　no　corner。　　Every　square　inch　of　the　ceilings；　walls；　

and　floors　has　been　carved；　embossed；　stencilled；　or　gilded　into　a　

bewildering　monotony。



The　husband；　whose　affairs　are　rapidly　increasing　on　his　hands；　has　

no　time　to　attend　to　such　insignificant　details　as　house　

decoration；　the　wife　has　perfect　confidence　in　the　taste　of　the　

firm　employed。　　So　at　the　suggestion　of　the　latter；　and　in　order　to　

complete　the　beauty　of　the　rooms；　a　Bouguereau；　a　Toulmouche　and　a　

couple　of　Schreyers　are　bought；　and　a　number　of　modern　French　

bronzes　scattered　about　on　the　multicolored　cabinets。　　Then；　at　

last；　the　happy　owners　of　all　this　splendor　open　their　doors　to　the　

admiration　of　their　friends。



About　the　time　the　peacock　plush　and　the　gilding　begin　to　show　

signs　of　wear　and　tear；　rumors　of　a　fresh　fashion　in　decoration　

float　across　from　England；　and　the　new　gospel　of　the　beautiful　

according　to　Clarence　Cook　is　first　preached　to　an　astonished　

nation。



The　fortune　of　our　couple　continuing　to　develop　with　pleasing　

rapidity；　the　building　of　a　country　house　is　next　decided　upon。　　A　

friend　of　the　husband；　who　has　recently　started　out　as　an　

architect；　designs　them　a　picturesque　residence　without　a　straight　

line　on　its　exterior　or　a　square　room　inside。　　This　house　is　done　

up　in　strict　obedience　to　the　teachings　of　the　new　sect。　　The　

dining…room　is　made　about　as　cheerful　as　the　entrance　to　a　family　

vault。　　The　rest　of　the　house　bears　a　close　resemblance　to　an　

ecclesiastical　junk　shop。　　The　entrance　hall　is　filled　with　what　

appears　to　be　a　communion　table　in　solid　oak；　and　the　massive　

chairs　and　settees　of　the　parlor　suggest　the　withdrawing　room　of　

Rowena；　aesthetic　shades　of　momie…cloth　drape　deep…set　windows；　

where　anaemic　and　disjointed　females　in　stained　glass　pluck　

conventional　roses。



To　each　of　these　successive　transitions　the　husband　has　remained　

obediently　and　tranquilly　indifferent。　　He　has　in　his　heart　

considered　them　all　equally　unfitting　and　uncomfortable　and　sighed　

in　regretful　memory　of　a　deep；　old…fashioned　arm…chair　that　

sheltered　his　after…dinner　naps　in　the　early　rosewood　period。　　So　

far　he　has　been　as　clay　in　the　hands　of　his　beloved　wife；　but　the　

anaemic　ladies　and　the　communion　table　are　the　last　drop　that　

causes　his　cup　to　overflow。　　He　revolts　and　begins　to　take　matters　

into　his　own　hands　with　the　result　that　the　household　enters　its　

fifth　incarnation　under　his　guidance；　during　which　everything　is　

painted　white　and　all　the　wall…papers　are　a　vivid　scarlet。　　The　

family　sit　on　bogus　Chippendale　and　eat　off　blue　and　white　china。



With　the　building　of　their　grand　new　house　near　the　park　the　couple　

rise　together　into　the　sixth　cycle　of　their　development。　　Having　

travelled　and　studied　the　epochs　by　this　time；　they　can　tell　a　

Louis　XIV。　from　a　Louis　XV。　room；　and　recognize　that　mahogany　and　

brass　sphinxes　denote　furniture　of　the　Empire。　　This　newly　acquired　

knowledge　is；　however；　vague　and　hazy。　　They　have　no　confidence　in　

themselves；　so　give　over　the　fitting　of　their　principal　floors　to　

the　New　York　branch　of　a　great　French　house。　　Little　is　talked　of　

now　but　periods；　plans；　and　elevations。　　Under　the　guidance　of　the　

French　firm；　they　acquire　at　vast　expense；　faked　reproductions　as　

historic　furniture。



The　spacious　rooms　are　sticky　with　new　gilding；　and　the　flowered　

brocades　of　the　hangings　and　furniture　crackle　to　the　touch。　　The　

rooms　were　not　designed　by　the　architect　to　receive　any　special　

kind　of　〃treatment。〃　　Immense　folding…doors　unite　the　salons；　and　

windows　open　anywhere。　　The　decorations　of　the　walls　have　been　

applied　like　a　poultice；　regardless　of　the　proportions　of　the　rooms　

and　the　distribution　of　the　spaces。



Building　and　decorating　are；　however；　the　best　of　educations。　　The　

husband；　freed　at　last　from　his　business　occupations；　finds　in　this　

new　study　an　interest　and　a　charm　unknown　to　him　before。　　He　and　

his　wife　are　both　vaguely　disappointed　when　their　resplendent　

mansion　is　finished；　having　already　outgrown　it；　and　recognize　that　

in　spite　of　correct　detail；　their　costly　apartments　no　more　

resemble　the　stately　and　simple　salons　seen　abroad　than　the　cabin　

of　a　Fall　River　boat　resembles　the　GALERIE　DES　GLACES　at　

V