three men on the bummel-第4章
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〃And I'll tell you where；〃 continued he； 〃through the Black
Forest。〃
〃Why； that's ALL uphill；〃 said George。
〃Not all；〃 retorted Harris； 〃say two…thirds。 And there's one thing
you've forgotten。〃
He looked round cautiously； and sunk his voice to a whisper。
〃There are little railways going up those hills； little cogwheel
things that〃
The door opened； and Mrs。 Harris appeared。 She said that
Ethelbertha was putting on her bonnet； and that Muriel； after
waiting； had given 〃The Mad Hatter's Tea Party〃 without us。
〃Club； to…morrow； at four；〃 whispered Harris to me； as he rose； and
I passed it on to George as we went upstairs
CHAPTER II
A delicate businessWhat Ethelbertha might have saidWhat she did
sayWhat Mrs。 Harris saidWhat we told GeorgeWe will start on
WednesdayGeorge suggests the possibility of improving our minds
Harris and I are doubtfulWhich man on a tandem does the most
work？The opinion of the man in frontViews of the man behind
How Harris lost his wifeThe luggage questionThe wisdom of my
late Uncle PodgerBeginning of story about a man who had a bag。
I opened the ball with Ethelbertha that same evening。 I commenced
by being purposely a little irritable。 My idea was that
Ethelbertha would remark upon this。 I should admit it； and account
for it by over brain pressure。 This would naturally lead to talk
about my health in general； and the evident necessity there was for
my taking prompt and vigorous measures。 I thought that with a
little tact I might even manage so that the suggestion should come
from Ethelbertha herself。 I imagined her saying： 〃No； dear； it is
change you want； complete change。 Now be persuaded by me； and go
away for a month。 No； do not ask me to come with you。 I know you
would rather that I did； but I will not。 It is the society of
other men you need。 Try and persuade George and Harris to go with
you。 Believe me； a highly strung brain such as yours demands
occasional relaxation from the strain of domestic surroundings。
Forget for a little while that children want music lessons； and
boots； and bicycles； with tincture of rhubarb three times a day；
forget there are such things in life as cooks； and house
decorators； and next…door dogs； and butchers' bills。 Go away to
some green corner of the earth； where all is new and strange to
you； where your over…wrought mind will gather peace and fresh
ideas。 Go away for a space and give me time to miss you； and to
reflect upon your goodness and virtue； which； continually present
with me； I may； human…like； be apt to forget； as one； through use；
grows indifferent to the blessing of the sun and the beauty of the
moon。 Go away； and come back refreshed in mind and body； a
brighter； better manif that be possiblethan when you went
away。〃
But even when we obtain our desires they never come to us garbed as
we would wish。 To begin with； Ethelbertha did not seem to remark
that I was irritable； I had to draw her attention to it。 I said：
〃You must forgive me； I'm not feeling quite myself to…night。〃
She said： 〃Oh！ I have not noticed anything different； what's the
matter with you？〃
〃I can't tell you what it is；〃 I said； 〃I've felt it coming on for
weeks。〃
〃It's that whisky；〃 said Ethelbertha。 〃You never touch it except
when we go to the Harris's。 You know you can't stand it； you have
not a strong head。〃
〃It isn't the whisky；〃 I replied； 〃it's deeper than that。 I fancy
it's more mental than bodily。〃
〃You've been reading those criticisms again；〃 said Ethelbertha；
more sympathetically； 〃why don't you take my advice and put them on
the fire？〃
〃And it isn't the criticisms；〃 I answered； 〃they've been quite
flattering of lateone or two of them。〃
〃Well； what is it？〃 said Ethelbertha； 〃there must be something to
account for it。〃
〃No； there isn't；〃 I replied； 〃that's the remarkable thing about
it； I can only describe it as a strange feeling of unrest that
seems to have taken possession of me。〃
Ethelbertha glanced across at me with a somewhat curious
expression； I thought； but as she said nothing； I continued the
argument myself。
〃This aching monotony of life； these days of peaceful； uneventful
felicity； they appal one。〃
〃I should not grumble at them；〃 said Ethelbertha； 〃we might get
some of the other sort； and like them still less。〃
〃I'm not so sure of that；〃 I replied。 〃In a life of continuous
joy； I can imagine even pain coming as a welcome variation。 I
wonder sometimes whether the saints in heaven do not occasionally
feel the continual serenity a burden。 To myself a life of endless
bliss； uninterrupted by a single contrasting note； would； I feel；
grow maddening。 I suppose；〃 I continued； 〃I am a strange sort of
man； I can hardly understand myself at times。 There are moments；〃
I added； 〃when I hate myself。〃
Often a little speech like this； hinting at hidden depths of
indescribable emotion has touched Ethelbertha； but to…night she
appeared strangely unsympathetic。 With regard to heaven and its
possible effect upon me； she suggested my not worrying myself about
that； remarking it was always foolish to go half…way to meet
trouble that might never come； while as to my being a strange sort
of fellow； that； she supposed； I could not help； and if other
people were willing to put up with me； there was an end of the
matter。 The monotony of life； she added； was a common experience；
there she could sympathise with me。
〃You don't know I long；〃 said Ethelbertha； 〃to get away
occasionally； even from you； but I know it can never be； so I do
not brood upon it。〃
I had never heard Ethelbertha speak like this before； it astonished
and grieved me beyond measure。
〃That's not a very kind remark to make；〃 I said； 〃not a wifely
remark。〃
〃I know it isn't；〃 she replied； 〃that is why I have never said it
before。 You men never can understand；〃 continued Ethelbertha；
〃that； however fond a woman may be of a man； there are times when
he palls upon her。 You don't know how I long to be able sometimes
to put on my bonnet and go out； with nobody to ask me where I am
going； why I am going； how long I am going to be； and when I shall
be back。 You don't know how I sometimes long to order a dinner
that I should like and that the children would like； but at the
sight of which you would put on your hat and be off to the Club。
You don't know how much I feel inclined sometimes to invite some
woman here that I like； and that I know you don't； to go and see
the people that I want to see； to go to bed when _I_ am tired； and
to get up when _I_ feel I want to get up。 Two people living
together are bound both to be continually sacrificing their own
desires to the other one。 It is sometimes a good thing to slacken
the strain a bit。〃
On thinking over Ethelbertha's words afterwards； have come to see
their wisdom； but at the time I admit I was hurt and indignant。
〃If your desire；〃 I said； 〃is to get rid of me〃
〃Now； don't be an old goose；〃 said Ethelbertha； 〃I only want to get
rid of you for a little while； just long enough to forget there are
one or two corners about you that are not perfect； just long enough
to let me remember what a dear fellow you are in other respects；
and to look forward to your return； as I used to look forward to
your coming in the old days when I did not see you so often as to
become； perhaps； a little indifferent to you； as one grows
indifferent to the glory of the sun； just because he is there every
day。〃
I did not like the tone that Ethelbertha took。 There seemed to be
a frivolity about her； unsuited to the theme into which we had
drifted。 That a woman should contemplate cheerfully an absence of
three or four weeks from her husband appeared to me to be not
altogether nice； not what I call womanly； it was not like
Ethelbertha at all。 I was worried； I felt I didn't want to go this
trip at all。 If it had not been for George and Harris； I would
have abandoned it。 As it was； I could not see how to change my
mind with dignity。
〃Very well； Ethelbertha；〃 I replied； 〃it shall be as you wish。 If
you desire a holiday from my presence； you shall enjoy it； but if
it be not impertinent
