burlesques-第42章

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chance　of　safety　lay　in　the　destruction　of　this　man。　　I　shouted　to

him　in　a　voice　of　thunder　（in　the　Hindustanee　tongue　of　course）；

〃Stop；　dog；　if　you　dare；　and　encounter　a　man！〃



In　reply　his　lance　came　whirling　in　the　air　over　my　head；　and

mortally　transfixed　poor　Foggarty　of　ours；　who　was　behind　me。

Grinding　my　teeth　and　swearing　horribly；　I　drew　that　scimitar　which

never　yet　failed　its　blow；*　and　rushed　at　the　Indian。　　He　came　down

at　full　gallop；　his　own　sword　making　ten　thousand　gleaming　circles

in　the　air；　shrieking　his　cry　of　battle。





*　In　my　affair　with　Macgillicuddy；　I　was　fool　enough　to　go　out　with

small…swordsmiserable　weapons　only　fit　for　tailors。G。　O'G。　G。





The　contest　did　not　last　an　instant。　　With　my　first　blow　I　cut　off

his　sword…arm　at　the　wrist；　my　second　I　levelled　at　his　head。　　I

said　that　he　wore　a　steel　cap；　with　a　gilt　iron　spike　of　six

inches；　and　a　hood　of　chain　mail。　　I　rose　in　my　stirrups　and

delivered　〃ST。　GEORGE；〃　my　sword　caught　the　spike　exactly　on　the

point；　split　it　sheer　in　two；　cut　crashing　through　the　steel　cap

and　hood；　and　was　only　stopped　by　a　ruby　which　he　wore　in　his　back…

plate。　　His　head；　cut　clean　in　two　between　the　eyebrows　and

nostrils；　even　between　the　two　front　teeth；　fell　one　side　on　each

shoulder；　and　he　galloped　on　till　his　horse　was　stopped　by　my　men；

who　were　not　a　little　amused　at　the　feat。



As　I　had　expected；　the　remaining　ruffians　fled　on　seeing　their

leader's　fate。　　I　took　home　his　helmet　by　way　of　curiosity；　and　we

made　a　single　prisoner；　who　was　instantly　carried　before　old

Jowler。



We　asked　the　prisoner　the　name　of　the　leader　of　the　troop；　he　said

it　was　Chowder　Loll。



〃Chowder　Loll！〃　shrieked　Colonel　Jowler。　　〃O　fate！　thy　hand　is

here！〃　　He　rushed　wildly　into　his　tentthe　next　day　applied　for

leave　of　absence。　　Gutch　took　the　command　of　the　regiment；　and　I

saw　him　no　more　for　some　time。



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As　I　had　distinguished　myself　not　a　little　during　the　war；　General

Lake　sent　me　up　with　despatches　to　Calcutta；　where　Lord　Wellesley

received　me　with　the　greatest　distinction。　　Fancy　my　surprise；　on

going　to　a　ball　at　Government　House；　to　meet　my　old　friend　Jowler；

my　trembling；　blushing；　thrilling　delight；　when　I　saw　Julia　by　his

side！



Jowler　seemed　to　blush　too　when　he　beheld　me。　　I　thought　of　my

former　passages　with　his　daughter。　　〃Gagy　my　boy；〃　says　he；　shaking

hands；　glad　to　see　you。　　Old　friend；　Juliacome　to　tiffin

Hodgson's　palebrave　fellow　Gagy。〃　　Julia　did　not　speak；　but　she

turned　ashy　pale；　and　fixed　upon　me　her　awful　eyes！　　I　fainted

almost；　and　uttered　some　incoherent　words。　　Julia　took　my　hand；

gazed　at　me　still；　and　said；　〃Come！〃　　Need　I　say　I　went？



I　will　not　go　over　the　pale　ale　and　currie…bhaut　again；　but　this　I

know；　that　in　half　an　hour　I　was　as　much　in　love　as　I　ever　had

been：　and　that　in　three　weeks　Iyes；　Iwas　the　accepted　lover　of

Julia！　　I　did　not　pause　to　ask　where　were　the　one　hundred　and

twenty…four　offers？　why　I；　refused　before；　should　be　accepted　now？

I　only　felt　that　I　loved　her；　and　was　happy！



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One　night；　one　memorable　night；　I　could　not　sleep；　and；　with　a

lover's　pardonable　passion；　wandered　solitary　through　the　city　of

palaces　until　I　came　to　the　house　which　contained　my　Julia。　　I

peeped　into　the　compoundall　was　still；　I　looked　into　the　veranda

all　was　dark；　except　a　lightyes；　one　lightand　it　was　in

Julia's　chamber！　　My　heart　throbbed　almost　to　stilling。　　I　wouldI

WOULD　advance；　if　but　to　gaze　upon　her　for　a　moment；　and　to　bless

her　as　she　slept。　　I　DID　look；　I　DID　advance；　and；　O　heaven！　I　saw

a　lamp　burning；　Mrs。　Jow。　in　a　nightdress；　with　a　very　dark　baby　in

her　arms；　and　Julia　looking　tenderly　at　an　ayah；　who　was　nursing

another。



〃Oh；　mamma；〃　said　Julia；　〃what　would　that　fool　Gahagan　say　if　he

knew　all？〃



〃HE　DOES　KNOW　ALL！〃　shouted　I；　springing　forward；　and　tearing　down

the　tatties　from　the　window。　　Mrs。　Jow。　ran　shrieking　out　of　the

room；　Julia　fainted；　the　cursed　black　children　squalled；　and　their

dd　nurse　fell　on　her　knees；　gabbling　some　infernal　jargon　of

Hindustanee。　　Old　Jowler　at　this　juncture　entered　with　a　candle　and

a　drawn　sword。



〃Liar！　scoundrel！　deceiver！〃　shouted　I。　　〃Turn；　ruffian；　and　defend

yourself！〃　　But　old　Jowler；　when　he　saw　me；　only　whistled；　looked

at　his　lifeless　daughter；　and　slowly　left　the　room。



Why　continue　the　tale？　　I　need　not　now　account　for　Jowler's　gloom

on　receiving　his　letters　from　Benaresfor　his　exclamation　upon　the

death　of　the　Indian　chieffor　his　desire　to　marry　his　daughter：

the　woman　I　was　wooing　was　no　longer　Miss　Julia　Jowler；　she　was

Mrs。　Chowder　Loll！





CHAPTER　II。



ALLYGHUR　AND　LASWAREE。





I　sat　down　to　write　gravely　and　sadly；　for　（since　the　appearance　of

some　of　my　adventures　in　a　monthly　magazine）　unprincipled　men　have

endeavored　to　rob　me　of　the　only　good　I　possess；　to　question　the

statements　that　I　make；　and；　themselves　without　a　spark　of　honor　or

good　feeling；　to　steal　from　me　that　which　is　my　sole　wealthmy

character　as　a　teller　of　THE　TRUTH。



The　reader　will　understand　that　it　is　to　the　illiberal　strictures

of　a　profligate　press　I　now　allude；　among　the　London　journalists；

none　（luckily　for　themselves）　have　dared　to　question　the　veracity

of　my　statements：　they　know　me；　and　they　know　that　I　am　IN　LONDON。

If　I　can　use　the　pen；　I　can　also　wield　a　more　manly　and　terrible

weapon；　and　would　answer　their　contradictions　with　my　sword！　　No

gold　or　gems　adorn　the　hilt　of　that　war…worn　scimitar；　but　there　is

blood　upon　the　bladethe　blood　of　the　enemies　of　my　country；　and

the　maligners　of　my　honest　fame。　　There　are　others；　howeverthe

disgrace　of　a　disgraceful　tradewho；　borrowing　from　distance　a

despicable　courage；　have　ventured　to　assail　me。　　The　infamous

editors　of　the　Kelso　Champion；　the　Bungay　Beacon；　the　Tipperary

Argus；　and　the　Stoke　Pogis　Sentinel；　and　other　dastardly　organs　of

the　provincial　press；　have；　although　differing　in　politics；　agreed

upon　this　one　point；　and　with　a　scoundrelly　unanimity；　vented　a

flood　of　abuse　upon　the　revelations　made　by　me。



They　say　that　I　have　assailed　private　characters；　and　wilfully

perverted　history　to　blacken　the　reputation　of　public　men。　　I　ask；

was　any　one　of　these　men　in　Bengal　in　the　year　1803？　　Was　any

single　conductor　of　any　one　of　these　paltry　prints　ever　in

Bundelcund　or　the　Rohilla　country？　　Does　this　EXQUISITE　Tipperary

scribe　know　the　difference　between　Hurrygurrybang　and　Burrumtollah？

Not　he！　and　because；　forsooth；　in　those　strange　and　distant　lands

strange　circumstances　have　taken　place；　it　is　insinuated　that　the

relater　is　a　liar：　nay；　that　the　very　places　themselves　have　no

existence　but　in　my　imagination。　　Fools！but　I　will　not　waste　my

anger　upon　them；　and　proceed　to　recount　some　other　portions　of　my

personal　history。



It　is；　I　presume；　a　fact　which　even　THESE　scribbling　assassins　will

not　venture　to　deny；　that　before　the　commencement　of　the　campaign

against　Scindiah；　the　English　General　formed　a　camp　at　Kanouge　on

the　Jumna；　where　he　exercised　that　brilliant　little　army　which　was

speedily　to　perform　such　wonders　in　the　Dooab。　　It　will　be　as　well

to　give　a　slight　account　of　the　causes　of　a　war　which　was　speedily

to　rage　through　some　of　the　fairest　portions　of　the　Indian

continent。



Shah　Allum；　the　son　of　Shah　Lollum；　the　descendant　by　the　female

line　of　Nadir　Shah　（that　celebrated　Toorkomaun　adventurer；　who　had

wellnigh　hurled　Bajazet　and　Selim　the　Second　from　the　throne　of

Bagdad）Shah　Allum；　I　say；　although　nominally　the　Emperor　of

Delhi；　was　in　reality　the　slave　of　the　various　warlike　chieftains

who　lorded　it　by　turns　over　the　country　and　the　sovereign；　until

conquered　and　slain　by　some　more　successful　rebel。　　Chowder　Loll

Masolgee；　Zubberdust　Khan；　Dowsunt　Row　Scindiah；　a