speeches-literary & social-第50章

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months　the　attention　of　the　committee　has　been　called　to　this　great

expenditure；　and　twice　the　committee　have　considered　that　it　was

not　unreasonable。　　I　cannot　conceive　a　stronger　case　for　the

resolution　than　this　statement　of　fact　as　to　the　expenditure　going

forth　to　the　public　accompanied　by　the　committee's　assertion　that

it　is　reasonable。　　Now；　to　separate　this　question　from　details；　let

us　remember　what　the　committee　and　their　supporters　asserted　last

year；　and；　I　hope；　will　re…assert　this　year。　　It　seems　to　be　rather

the　model　kind　of　thing　than　otherwise　now　that　if　you　get　100

pounds　you　are　to　spend　40　pounds　in　management；　and　if　you　get

1000　pounds；　of　course　you　may　spend　400　pounds　in　giving　the　rest

away。　　Now；　in　case　there　should　be　any　ill…conditioned　people　here

who　may　ask　what　occasion　there　can　be　for　all　this　expenditure；　I

will　give　you　my　experience。　　I　went　last　year　to　a　highly

respectable　place　of　resort；　Willis's　Rooms；　in　St。　James's；　to　a

meeting　of　this　fund。　　My　original　intention　was　to　hear　all　I

could；　and　say　as　little　as　possible。　　Allowing　for　the　absence　of

the　younger　and　fairer　portion　of　the　creation；　the　general

appearance　of　the　place　was　something　like　Almack's　in　the　morning。

A　number　of　stately　old　dowagers　sat　in　a　row　on　one　side；　and　old

gentlemen　on　the　other。　　The　ball　was　opened　with　due　solemnity　by

a　real　marquis；　who　walked　a　minuet　with　the　secretary；　at　which

the　audience　were　much　affected。　　Then　another　party　advanced；　who；

I　am　sorry　to　say；　was　only　a　member　of　the　House　of　Commons；　and

he　took　possession　of　the　floor。　　To　him；　however；　succeeded　a

lord；　then　a　bishop；　then　the　son　of　a　distinguished　lord；　then　one

or　two　celebrities　from　the　City　and　Stock　Exchange；　and　at　last　a

gentleman；　who　made　a　fortune　by　the　success　of　〃Candide；〃

sustained　the　part　of　Pangloss；　and　spoke　much　of　what　he　evidently

believed　to　be　the　very　best　management　of　this　best　of　all

possible　funds。　　Now　it　is　in　this　fondness　for　being　stupendously

genteel；　and　keeping　up　fine　appearances　…　this　vulgar　and　common

social　vice　of　hanging　on　to　great　connexions　at　any　price；　that

the　money　goes。　　The　last　time　you　got　a　distinguished　writer　at　a

public　meeting；　and　he　was　called　on　to　address　you　somewhere

amongst　the　small　hours；　he　told　you　he　felt　like　the　man　in　plush

who　was　permitted　to　sweep　the　stage　down　after　all　the　other

people　had　gone。　　If　the　founder　of　this　society　were　here；　I

should　think　he　would　feel　like　a　sort　of　Rip　van　Winkle　reversed；

who　had　gone　to　sleep　backwards　for　a　hundred　years　and　woke　up　to

find　his　fund　still　lying　under　the　feet　of　people　who　did　nothing

for　it　instead　of　being　emancipated　and　standing　alone　long　ago。

This　Bloomsbury　house　is　another　part　of　the　same　desire　for　show；

and　the　officer　who　inhabits　it。　　（I　mean；　of　course；　in　his

official　capacity；　for；　as　an　individual；　I　much　respect　him。）

When　one　enters　the　house　it　appears　to　be　haunted　by　a　series　of

mysterious…looking　ghosts；　who　glide　about　engaged　in　some

extraordinary　occupation；　and；　after　the　approved　fashion　of

ghosts；　but　seldom　condescend　to　disclose　their　business。　　What　are

all　these　meetings　and　inquiries　wanted　for？　　As　for　the　authors；　I

say；　as　a　writer　by　profession；　that　the　long　inquiry　said　to　be

necessary　to　ascertain　whether　an　applicant　deserves　relief；　is　a

preposterous　pretence；　and　that　working　literary　men　would　have　a

far　better　knowledge　of　the　cases　coming　before　the　board　than　can

ever　be　attained　by　that　committee。　　Further；　I　say　openly　and

plainly；　that　this　fund　is　pompously　and　unnaturally　administered

at　great　expense；　instead　of　being　quietly　administered　at　small

expense；　and　that　the　secrecy　to　which　it　lays　claim　as　its

greatest　attribute；　is　not　kept；　for　through　those　〃two　respectable

householders；〃　to　whom　reference　must　be　made；　the　names　of　the

most　deserving　applicants　are　to　numbers　of　people　perfectly　well

known。　　The　members　have　now　got　before　them　a　plain　statement　of

fact　as　to　these　charges；　and　it　is　for　them　to　say　whether　they

are　justifiable；　becoming；　or　decent。　　I　beg　most　earnestly　and

respectfully　to　put　it　to　those　gentlemen　who　belong　to　this

institution；　that　must　now　decide；　and　cannot　help　deciding；　what

the　Literary　Fund　is　for；　and　what　it　is　not　for。　　The　question

raised　by　the　resolution　is　whether　this　is　a　public　corporation

for　the　relief　of　men　of　genius　and　learning；　or　whether　it　is　a

snug；　traditional；　and　conventional　party；　bent　upon　maintaining

its　own　usages　with　a　vast　amount　of　pride；　upon　its　own　annual

puffery　at　costly　dinner…tables；　and　upon　a　course　of　expensive

toadying　to　a　number　of　distinguished　individuals。　　This　is　the

question　which　you　cannot　this　day　escape。







SPEECH：　　LONDON；　NOVEMBER　5；　1857。







＇At　the　fourth　anniversary　dinner　of　the　Warehousemen　and　Clerks

Schools；　which　took　place　on　Thursday　evening；　Nov。　5th；　1857；　at

the　London　Tavern；　and　was　very　numerously　attended；　Mr。　Charles

Dickens　occupied　the　chair。　　On　the　subject　which　had　brought　the

company　together　Mr。　Dickens　spoke　as　follows：…＇



I　MUST　now　solicit　your　attention　for　a　few　minutes　to　the　cause　of

your　assembling　together　…　the　main　and　real　object　of　this

evening's　gathering；　for　I　suppose　we　are　all　agreed　that　the　motto

of　these　tables　is　not　〃Let　us　eat　and　drink；　for　to…morrow　we

die；〃　but；　〃Let　us　eat　and　drink；　for　to…morrow　we　live。〃　　It　is

because　a　great　and　good　work　is　to　live　to…morrow；　and　to…morrow；

and　to…morrow；　and　to　live　a　greater　and　better　life　with　every

succeeding　to…morrow；　that　we　eat　and　drink　here　at　all。

Conspicuous　on　the　card　of　admission　to　this　dinner　is　the　word

〃Schools。〃　　This　set　me　thinking　this　morning　what　are　the　sorts　of

schools　that　I　don't　like。　　I　found　them　on　consideration；　to　be

rather　numerous。　　I　don't　like　to　begin　with；　and　to　begin　as

charity　does　at　home　…　I　don't　like　the　sort　of　school　to　which　I

once　went　myself　…　the　respected　proprietor　of　which　was　by　far　the

most　ignorant　man　I　have　ever　had　the　pleasure　to　know；　one　of　the

worst…tempered　men　perhaps　that　ever　lived；　whose　business　it　was

to　make　as　much　out　of　us　and　put　as　little　into　us　as　possible；

and　who　sold　us　at　a　figure　which　I　remember　we　used　to　delight　to

estimate；　as　amounting　to　exactly　2　pounds　4s。　6d。　per　head。　　I

don't　like　that　sort　of　school；　because　I　don't　see　what　business

the　master　had　to　be　at　the　top　of　it　instead　of　the　bottom；　and

because　I　never　could　understand　the　wholesomeness　of　the　moral

preached　by　the　abject　appearance　and　degraded　condition　of　the

teachers　who　plainly　said　to　us　by　their　looks　every　day　of　their

lives；　〃Boys；　never　be　learned；　whatever　you　are；　above　all　things

be　warned　from　that　in　time　by　our　sunken　cheeks；　by　our　poor

pimply　noses；　by　our　meagre　diet；　by　our　acid…beer；　and　by　our

extraordinary　suits　of　clothes；　of　which　no　human　being　can　say

whether　they　are　snuff…coloured　turned　black；　or　black　turned

snuff…coloured；　a　point　upon　which　we　ourselves　are　perfectly

unable　to　offer　any　ray　of　enlightenment；　it　is　so　very　long　since

they　were　undarned　and　new。〃　　I　do　not　like　that　sort　of　school；

because　I　have　never　yet　lost　my　ancient　suspicion　touching　that

curious　coincidence　that　the　boy　with　four　brothers　to　come　always

got　the　prizes。　　In　fact；　and　short；　I　do　not　like　that　sort　of

school；　which　is　a　pernicious　and　abominable　humbug；　altogether。

Again；　ladies　and　gentlemen；　I　don't　like　that　sort　of　school　…　a

ladies'　school　…　with　which　the　other　school　used　to　dance　on

Wednesdays；　where　the　young　ladies；　as　I　look　back　upon　them　now；

seem　to　me　always　to　have　been　in　new　stays　and　disgrace　…　the

latter　concerning　a　place　of　which　I　know　nothing　at　this　day；　that

bounds　Timbuctoo　on　the　north…east　…　and　where　memory　always

depicts　the　youthful　enthraller　of　my　first