susy, a story of the plains-第14章

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absent。　　But　he　did　not　notice　it；　and　only　replied　tenderly：



〃But　I　want　to　say　a　great　deal　to　you；　Susy。　　I　want　to　say　that　if

you　still　feel　as　I　do；　and　as　I　have　always　felt；　and　you　think　you

could　be　happy　as　I　would　be　ififwe　could　be　always　together；　we

need　not　conceal　it　from　your　mother　and　father　any　longer。　　I　am

old　enough　to　speak　for　myself；　and　I　am　my　own　master。　　Your　mother

has　been　very　kind　to　me；so　kind　that　it　doesn't　seem　quite　right

to　deceive　her；and　when　I　tell　her　that　I　love　you；　and　that　I

want　you　to　be　my　wife；　I　believe　she　will　give　us　her　blessing。〃



Susy　uttered　a　strange　little　laugh；　and　with　an　assumption　of

coyness；　that　was；　however；　still　affected；　stooped　to　pick　a　few

berries　from　a　manzanita　bush。



〃I'll　tell　you　what　she'll　say；　Clarence。　　She'll　say　you're

frightfully　young；　and　so　you　are！〃



The　young　fellow　tried　to　echo　the　laugh；　but　felt　as　if　he　had

received　a　blow。　　For　the　first　time　he　was　conscious　of　the　truth：

this　girl；　whom　he　had　fondly　regarded　as　a　child；　had　already

passed　him　in　the　race；　she　had　become　a　woman　before　he　was　yet　a

man；　and　now　stood　before　him；　maturer　in　her　knowledge；　and　older

in　her　understanding；　of　herself　and　of　him。　　This　was　the　change

that　had　perplexed　him；　this　was　the　presence　that　had　come　between

them；a　Susy　he　had　never　known　before。



She　laughed　at　his　changed　expression；　and　then　swung　herself　easily

to　a　sitting　posture　on　the　low　projecting　branch　of　a　hemlock。　　The

act　was　still　girlish；　but；　nevertheless；　she　looked　down　upon　him

in　a　superior；　patronizing　way。　　〃Now；　Clarence；〃　she　said；　with　a

half…abstracted　manner；　〃don't　you　be　a　big　fool！　　If　you　talk　that

way　to　mother；　she'll　only　tell　you　to　wait　two　or　three　years　until

you　know　your　own　mind；　and　she'll　pack　me　off　to　that　horrid　school

again；　besides　watching　me　like　a　cat　every　moment　you　are　here。　　If

you　want　to　stay　here；　and　see　me　sometimes　like　this；　you'll　just

behave　as　you　have　done；　and　say　nothing。　　Do　you　see？　　Perhaps　you

don't　care　to　come；　or　are　satisfied　with　Mary　and　mother。　　Say　so；

then。　　Goodness　knows；　I　don't　want　to　force　you　to　come　here。〃



Modest　and　reserved　as　Clarence　was　generally；　I　fear　that

bashfulness　of　approach　to　the　other　sex　was　not　one　of　these

indications。　　He　walked　up　to　Susy　with　appalling　directness；　and

passed　his　arm　around　her　waist。　　She　did　not　move；　but　remained

looking　at　him　and　his　intruding　arm　with　a　certain　critical

curiosity；　as　if　awaiting　some　novel　sensation。　　At　which　he　kissed

her。　　She　then　slowly　disengaged　his　arm；　and　said：



〃Really；　upon　my　word；　Clarence；〃　in　perfectly　level　tones；　and

slipped　quietly　to　the　ground。



He　again　caught　her　in　his　arms；　encircling　her　disarranged　hair　and

part　of　the　beribboned　hat　hanging　over　her　shoulder；　and　remained

for　an　instant　holding　her　thus　silently　and　tenderly。　　Then　she

freed　herself　with　an　abstracted　air；　a　half　smile；　and　an　unchanged

color　except　where　her　soft　cheek　had　been　abraded　by　his　coat

collar。



〃You're　a　bold；　rude　boy；　Clarence；〃　she　said；　putting　back　her　hair

quietly；　and　straightening　the　brim　of　her　hat。　　〃Heaven　knows　where

you　learned　manners！〃　and　then；　from　a　safer　distance；　with　the　same

critical　look　in　her　violet　eyes；　〃I　suppose　you　think　mother　would

allow　THAT　if　she　knew　it？〃



But　Clarence；　now　completely　subjugated；　with　the　memory　of　the　kiss

upon　him　and　a　heightened　color；　protested　that　he　only　wanted　to

make　their　intercourse　less　constrained；　and　to　have　their

relations；　even　their　engagement；　recognized　by　her　parents；　still

he　would　take　her　advice。　　Only　there　was　always　the　danger　that　if

they　were　discovered　she　would　be　sent　back　to　the　convent　all　the

same；　and　his　banishment；　instead　of　being　the　probation　of　a　few

years；　would　be　a　perpetual　separation。



〃We　could　always　run　away；　Clarence；〃　responded　the　young　girl

calmly。　　〃There's　nothing　the　matter　with　THAT。〃



Clarence　was　startled。　　The　idea　of　desolating　the　sad；　proud；

handsome　Mrs。　Peyton；　whom　he　worshiped；　and　her　kind　husband；　whom

he　was　just　about　to　serve；　was　so　grotesque　and　confusing；　that　he

said　hopelessly；　〃Yes。〃



〃Of　course；〃　she　continued；　with　the　same　odd　affectation　of

coyness；　which　was；　however；　distinctly　uncalled　for；　as　she　eyed

him　from　under　her　broad　hat；　〃you　needn't　come　with　me　unless　you

like。　　I　can　run　away　by　myself；if　I　want　to！　　I've　thought　of　it

before。　　One　can't　stand　everything！〃



〃But；　Susy；〃　said　Clarence；　with　a　swift　remorseful　recollection　of

her　confidence　yesterday；　〃is　there　really　anything　troubles　you？

Tell　me；　dear。　　What　is　it？〃



〃Oh；　nothingEVERYTHING！　　It's　no　use；YOU　can't　understand！　　YOU

like　it；　I　know　you　do。　　I　can　see　it；　it's　your　style。　　But　it's

stupid；　it's　awful；　Clarence！　　With　mamma　snooping　over　you　and

around　you　all　day；　with　her　'dear　child；'　'mamma's　pet；'　and　'What

is　it；　dear？'　and　'Tell　it　all　to　your　own　mamma；'　as　if　I　would！

And　'my　own　mamma；'　indeed！　　As　if　I　didn't　know；　Clarence；　that　she

ISN'T。　　And　papa；　caring　for　nothing　but　this　hideous；　dreary

rancho；　and　the　huge；　empty　plains。　　It's　worse　than　school；　for

there；　at　least；　when　you　went　out；　you　could　see　something　besides

cattle　and　horses　and　yellow…faced　half…breeds！　　But　hereLord！

it's　only　a　wonder　I　haven't　run　away　before！〃



Startled　and　shocked　as　Clarence　was　at　this　revelation；　accompanied

as　it　was　by　a　hardness　of　manner　that　was　new　to　him；　the　influence

of　the　young　girl　was　still　so　strong　upon　him　that　he　tried　to

evade　it　as　only　an　extravagance；　and　said　with　a　faint　smile；　〃But

where　would　you　run　to？〃



She　looked　at　him　cunningly；　with　her　head　on　one　side；　and　then

said：



〃I　have　friends；　and〃



She　hesitated；　pursing　up　her　pretty　lips。



〃And　what？〃



〃Relations。〃



〃Relations？〃



〃Yes；an　aunt　by　marriage。　　She　lives　in　Sacramento。　　She'd　be

overjoyed　to　have　me　come　to　her。　　Her　second　husband　has　a　theatre

there。〃



〃But；　Susy；　what　does　Mrs。　Peyton　know　of　this？〃



〃Nothing。　　Do　you　think　I'd　tell　her；　and　have　her　buy　them　up　as

she　has　my　other　relations？　　Do　you　suppose　I　don't　know　that　I've

been　bought　up　like　a　nigger？〃



She　looked　indignant；　compressing　her　delicate　little　nostrils；　and

yet；　somehow；　Clarence　had　the　same　singular　impression　that　she　was

only　acting。



The　calling　of　a　far…off　voice　came　faintly　through　the　wood。



〃That's　Mary；　looking　for　me；〃　said　Susy　composedly。　　〃You　must　go；

now；　Clarence。　　Quick！　　Remember　what　I　said；and　don't　breathe　a

word　of　this。　　Good…by。〃



But　Clarence　was　standing　still；　breathless；　hopelessly　disturbed；

and　irresolute。　　Then　he　turned　away　mechanically　towards　the　trail。



〃Well；　Clarence？〃



She　was　looking　at　him　half　reproachfully；　half　coquettishly；　with

smiling；　parted　lips。　　He　hastened　to　forget　himself　and　his

troubles　upon　them　twice　and　thrice。　　Then　she　quickly　disengaged

herself；　whispered；　〃Go；　now；〃　and；　as　Mary's　call　was　repeated；

Clarence　heard　her　voice；　high　and　clear；　answering；　〃Here；　dear；〃

as　he　was　plunging　into　the　thicket。



He　had　scarcely　reached　the　madrono　tree　again　and　remounted　his

horse；　before　he　heard　the　sound　of　hoofs　approaching　from　the　road。

In　his　present　uneasiness　he　did　not　care　to　be　discovered　so　near

the　rendezvous；　and　drew　back　into　the　shadow　until　the　horseman

should　pass。　　It　was　Peyton；　with　a　somewhat　disturbed　face；　riding

rapidly。　　Still　less　was　he　inclined　to　join　or　immediately　follow

him；　but　he　was　relieved　when　his　host；　instead　of　taking　the　direct

road　to　the　rancho；　through　the　wild　oats；　turned　off　in　the

direction　of　the　corral。



A　moment　later　Clarence　wheeled　into　the　direct　road；　and　presently

found　himself　in　the　long　afternoon　shadows　through　the　thickest　of

the　grain。　　He　was　r