autobiography and selected essays-第7章

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Do　you　find　evidences　of　roughness？







THOMAS　HENRY　HUXLEY





AUTOBIOGRAPHY　＇1＇





And　when　I　consider；　in　one　view；　the　many　things　。　。　。　which　I

have　upon　my　hands；　I　feel　the　burlesque　of　being　employed　in　this

manner　at　my　time　of　life。　　But；　in　another　view；　and　taking　in　all

circumstances；　these　things；　as　trifling　as　they　may　appear；　no

less　than　things　of　greater　importance；　seem　to　be　put　upon　me　to

do。Bishop　Butler　to　the　Duchess　of　Somerset。





The　〃many　things〃　to　which　the　Duchess's　correspondent　here　refers

are　the　repairs　and　improvements　of　the　episcopal　seat　at　Auckland。

I　doubt　if　the　great　apologist；　greater　in　nothing　than　in　the

simple　dignity　of　his　character；　would　have　considered　the　writing

an　account　of　himself　as　a　thing　which　could　be　put　upon　him　to　do

whatever　circumstances　might　be　taken　in。　　But　the　good　bishop

lived　in　an　age　when　a　man　might　write　books　and　yet　be　permitted

to　keep　his　private　existence　to　himself；　in　the　pre…Boswellian　＇2＇

epoch；　when　the　germ　of　the　photographer　lay　concealed　in　the

distant　future；　and　the　interviewer　who　pervades　our　age　was　an

unforeseen；　indeed　unimaginable；　birth　of　time。



At　present；　the　most　convinced　believer　in　the　aphorism　〃Bene　qui

latuit；　bene　vixit；〃＇3＇　is　not　always　able　to　act　up　to　it。　　An

importunate　person　informs　him　that　his　portrait　is　about　to　be

published　and　will　be　accompanied　by　a　biography　which　the

importunate　person　proposes　to　write。　　The　sufferer　knows　what　that

means；　either　he　undertakes　to　revise　the　〃biography〃　or　he　does

not。　　In　the　former　case；　he　makes　himself　responsible；　in　the

latter；　he　allows　the　publication　of　a　mass　of　more　or　less　fulsome

inaccuracies　for　which　he　will　be　held　responsible　by　those　who　are

familiar　with　the　prevalent　art　of　self…advertisement。　　On　the

whole；　it　may　be　better　to　get　over　the　〃burlesque　of　being

employed　in　this　manner〃　and　do　the　thing　himself。



It　was　by　reflections　of　this　kind　that；　some　years　ago；　I　was　led

to　write　and　permit　the　publication　of　the　subjoined　sketch。





I　was　born　about　eight　o'clock　in　the　morning　on　the　4th　of　May；

1825；　at　Ealing；　which　was；　at　that　time；　as　quiet　a　little　country

village　as　could　be　found　within　a　half…a…dozen　miles　of　Hyde　Park

Corner。　　Now　it　is　a　suburb　of　London　with；　I　believe；　30；000

inhabitants。　　My　father　was　one　of　the　masters　in　a　large　semi…

public　school　which　at　one　time　had　a　high　reputation。　　I　am　not

aware　that　any　portents　preceded　my　arrival　in　this　world；　but；　in

my　childhood；　I　remember　hearing　a　traditional　account　of　the

manner　in　which　I　lost　the　chance　of　an　endowment　of　great

practical　value。　　The　windows　of　my　mother's　room　were　open；　in

consequence　of　the　unusual　warmth　of　the　weather。　　For　the　same

reason；　probably；　a　neighbouring　beehive　had　swarmed；　and　the　new

colony；　pitching　on　the　window…sill；　was　making　its　way　into　the

room　when　the　horrified　nurse　shut　down　the　sash。　　If　that　well…

meaning　woman　had　only　abstained　from　her　ill…timed　interference；

the　swarm　might　have　settled　on　my　lips；　and　I　should　have　been

endowed　with　that　mellifluous　eloquence　which；　in　this　country；

leads　far　more　surely　than　worth；　capacity；　or　honest　work；　to　the

highest　places　in　Church　and　State。　　But　the　opportunity　was　lost；

and　I　have　been　obliged　to　content　myself　through　life　with　saying

what　I　mean　in　the　plainest　of　plain　language；　than　which；　I

suppose；　there　is　no　habit　more　ruinous　to　a　man's　prospects　of

advancement。



Why　I　was　christened　Thomas　Henry　I　do　not　know；　but　it　is　a

curious　chance　that　my　parents　should　have　fixed　for　my　usual

denomination　upon　the　name　of　that　particular　Apostle　with　whom　I

have　always　felt　most　sympathy。　　Physically　and　mentally　I　am　the

son　of　my　mother　so　completelyeven　down　to　peculiar　movements　of

the　hands；　which　made　their　appearance　in　me　as　I　reached　the　age

she　had　when　I　noticed　themthat　I　can　hardly　find　any　trace　of　my

father　in　myself；　except　an　inborn　faculty　for　drawing；　which

unfortunately；　in　my　case；　has　never　been　cultivated；　a　hot　temper；

and　that　amount　of　tenacity　of　purpose　which　unfriendly　observers

sometimes　call　obstinacy。



My　mother　was　a　slender　brunette；　of　an　emotional　and　energetic

temperament；　and　possessed　of　the　most　piercing　black　eyes　I　ever

saw　in　a　woman's　head。　　With　no　more　education　than　other　women　of

the　middle　classes　in　her　day；　she　had　an　excellent　mental

capacity。　　Her　most　distinguishing　characteristic；　however；　was

rapidity　of　thought。　　If　one　ventured　to　suggest　she　had　not　taken

much　time　to　arrive　at　any　conclusion；　she　would　say；　〃I　cannot

help　it；　things　flash　across　me。〃　　That　peculiarity　has　been　passed

on　to　me　in　full　strength；　it　has　often　stood　me　in　good　stead；　it

has　sometimes　played　me　sad　tricks；　and　it　has　always　been　a

danger。　　But；　after　all；　if　my　time　were　to　come　over　again；　there

is　nothing　I　would　less　willingly　part　with　than　my　inheritance　of

mother　wit。



I　have　next　to　nothing　to　say　about　my　childhood。　　In　later　years

my　mother；　looking　at　me　almost　reproachfully；　would　sometimes　say；

〃Ah！　you　were　such　a　pretty　boy！〃　whence　I　had　no　difficulty　in

concluding　that　I　had　not　fulfilled　my　early　promise　in　the　matter

of　looks。　　In　fact；　I　have　a　distinct　recollection　of　certain　curls

of　which　I　was　vain；　and　of　a　conviction　that　I　closely　resembled

that　handsome；　courtly　gentleman；　Sir　Herbert　Oakley；　who　was　vicar

of　our　parish；　and　who　was　as　a　god　to　us　country　folk；　because　he

was　occasionally　visited　by　the　then　Prince　George　of　Cambridge。　＇4＇

I　remember　turning　my　pinafore　wrong　side　forwards　in　order　to

represent　a　surplice；　and　preaching　to　my　mother's　maids　in　the

kitchen　as　nearly　as　possible　in　Sir　Herbert's　manner　one　Sunday

morning　when　the　rest　of　the　family　were　at　church。　　That　is　the

earliest　indication　I　can　call　to　mind　of　the　strong　clerical

affinities　which　my　friend　Mr。　Herbert　Spencer　＇5＇　has　always

ascribed　to　me；　though　I　fancy　they　have　for　the　most　part　remained

in　a　latent　state。



My　regular　school　training　was　of　the　briefest；　perhaps

fortunately；　for　though　my　way　of　life　has　made　me　acquainted　with

all　sorts　and　conditions　of　men；　from　the　highest　to　the　lowest；　I

deliberately　affirm　that　the　society　I　fell　into　at　school　was　the

worst　I　have　ever　known。　　We　boys　were　average　lads；　with　much　the

same　inherent　capacity　for　good　and　evil　as　any　others；　but　the

people　who　were　set　over　us　cared　about　as　much　for　our

intellectual　and　moral　welfare　as　if　they　were　baby…farmers。　　We

were　left　to　the　operation　of　the　struggle　for　existence　among

ourselves；　and　bullying　was　the　least　of　the　ill　practices　current

among　us。　　Almost　the　only　cheerful　reminiscence　in　connection　with

the　place　which　arises　in　my　mind　is　that　of　a　battle　I　had　with

one　of　my　classmates；　who　had　bullied　me　until　I　could　stand　it　no

longer。　　I　was　a　very　slight　lad；　but　there　was　a　wild…cat　element

in　me　which；　when　roused；　made　up　for　lack　of　weight；　and　I　licked

my　adversary　effectually。　　However；　one　of　my　first　experiences　of

the　extremely　rough…and…ready　nature　of　justice；　as　exhibited　by

the　course　of　things　in　general；　arose　out　of　the　fact　that　Ithe

victorhad　a　black　eye；　while　hethe　vanquishedhad　none；　so

that　I　got　into　disgrace　and　he　did　not。　　We　made　it　up；　and

thereafter　I　was　unmolested。　　One　of　the　greatest　shocks　I　ever

received　in　my　life　was　to　be　told　a　dozen　years　afterwards　by　the

groom　who　brought　me　my　horse　in　a　stable…yard　in　Sydney　that　he

was　my　quondam　antagonist。　　He　had　a　long　story　of　family

misfortune　to　account　for　his　position；　but　at　that　time　it　was

necessary　to　deal　very　cautiously　with　mysterious　strangers　in　New

South　Wales；　and　on　inquiry　I　found　that　the　unfortunate　young　man

had　not　only　been　〃sent　out；〃　but　had　undergone　more　than　one

colonial　conviction。