green mansions-第50章
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f a great chief； who had much gold； and when he died it was all mine； and I was rich。 But I had an enemy； one worse than Managa； for he was rich and had many people。 And in a war his people overcame mine； and he took my gold； and all I possessed； making me poor。 The Indian kills his enemy； but the white man takes his gold； and that is worse than death。 Then I said： 'I have been a rich man and now I am poor； and must work like a dog for some rich man； for the sake of the little food he will throw me at the end of each day。 No； I cannot do it！ I will go away and live with the Indians； so that those who have seen me a rich man shall never see me working like a dog for a master； and cry out and mock at me。 For the Indians are not like white men： they have no gold； they are not rich and poor； all are alike。 One roof covers them from the rain and sun。 All have weapons which they make； all kill birds in the forest and catch fish in the rivers； and the women cook the meat and all eat from one pot。 And with the Indians I will be an Indian； and hunt in the forest and eat with them and drink with them。' Then I left my country and came here； and lived with you； Runi； and was well treated。 And now； why did I go away？ This I have now to tell you。 After I had been here a certain time I went over there to the forest。 You wished me not to go； because of an evil thing； a daughter of the Didi； that lived there； but I feared nothing and went。 There I met an old man； who talked to me in the white man's language。 He had travelled and seen much； and told me one strange thing。 On a mountain at Riolama he told me that he had seen a great lump of gold； as much as a man could carry。 And when I heard this I said： 'With the gold I could return to my country； and buy weapons for myself and all my people and go to war with my enemy and deprive him of all his possessions and serve him as he served me。' I asked the old man to take me to Riolama； and when he had consented I went away from here without saying a word； so as not to be prevented。 It is far to Riolama； and I had no weapons； but I feared nothing。 I said： 'If I must fight I must fight； and if I must be killed I must be killed。' But when I got to Riolama I found no gold。 There was only a yellow stone which the old man had mistaken for gold。 It was yellow； like gold； but it would buy nothing。 Therefore I came back to Parahuari again； to my friend； and if he is angry with me still because I went away without informing him； let him say： 'Go and seek elsewhere for a new friend； for I am your friend no longer。〃'
I concluded thus boldly because I did not wish him to know that I had suspected him of harbouring any sinister designs； or that I looked on our quarrel as a very serious one。 When I had finished speaking he emitted a sound which expressed neither approval nor disapproval； but only the fact that he had heard me。 But I was satisfied。 His expression had undergone a favourable change； it was less grim。 After a while he remarked； with a peculiar twitching of the mouth which might have developed into a smile： 〃The white man will do much to get gold。 You walked twenty days to see a yellow stone that would buy nothing。〃 It was fortunate that he took this view of the case； which was flattering to his Indian nature； and perhaps touched his sense of the ludicrous。 At all events； he said nothing to discredit my story； to which they had all listened with profound interest。
From that time it seemed to be tacitly agreed to let bygones be bygones； and I could see that as the dangerous feeling that had threatened my life diminished； the old pleasure they had once found in my company returned。 But my feelings towards them did not change； nor could they while that black and terrible suspicion concerning Rima was in my heart。 I talked again freely with them； as if there had been no break in the old friendly relations。 If they watched me furtively whenever I went out of doors； I affected not to see it。 I set to work to repair my rude guitar； which had been broken in my absence； and studied to show them a cheerful countenance。 But when alone； or in my hammock； hidden from their eyes； free to look into my own heart； then I was conscious that something new and strange had come into my life； that a new nature； black and implacable； had taken the place of the old。 And sometimes it was hard to conceal this fury that burnt in me； sometimes I felt an impulse to spring like a tiger on one of the Indians； to hold him fast by the throat until the secret I wished to learn was forced from his lips； then to dash his brains out against the stone。 But they were many； and there was no choice but to be cautious and patient if I wished to outwit them with a cunning superior to their own。
Three days after my arrival at the village； Kua…ko returned with his companion。 I greeted him with affected warmth； but was really pleased that he was back； believing that if the Indians knew anything of Rima he among them all would be most likely to tell it。
Kua…ko appeared to have brought some important news； which he discussed with Runi and the others； and on the following day I noticed that preparations for an expedition were in progress。 Spears and bows and arrows were got ready； but not blow…pipes； and I knew by this that the expedition would not be a hunting one。 Having discovered so much； also that only four men were going out； I called Kua…ko aside and begged him to let me go with them。 He seemed pleased at the proposal； and at once repeated it to Runi； who considered for a little and then consented。
By and by he said； touching his bow： 〃You cannot fight with our weapons； what will you do if we meet an enemy？〃
I smiled and returned that I would not run away。 All I wished to show him was that his enemies were my enemies； that I was ready to fight for my friend。
He was pleased at my words； and said no more and gave me no weapons。 Next morning； however； when we set out before daylight； I made the discovery that he was carrying my revolver fastened to his waist。 He had concealed it carefully under the one simple garment he wore； but it bulged slightly； and so the secret was betrayed。 I had never believed that he had lost it； and I was convinced that he took it now with the object of putting it into my hands at the last moment in case of meeting with an enemy。
From the village we travelled in a north…westerly direction； and before noon camped in a grove of dwarf trees； where we remained until the sun was low； then continued our walk through a rather barren country。 At night we camped again beside a small stream； only a few inches deep； and after a meal of smoked meat and parched maize prepared to sleep till dawn on the next day。
Sitting by the fire I resolved to make a first attempt to discover from Kua…ko anything concerning Rima which might be known to him。 Instead of lying down when the others did； I remained seated； my guardian also sittingno doubt waiting for me to lie down first。 Presently I moved nearer to him and began a conversation in a low voice； anxious not to rouse the attention of the other men。
〃Once you said that Oalava would be given to me for a wife；〃 I began。 〃Some day I shall want a wife。〃
He nodded approval； and remarked sententiously that the desire to possess a wife was common to all men。
〃What has been left to me？〃 I said despondingly and spreading out my hands。 〃My pistol gone； and did I not give Runi the tinder…box； and the little box with a cock painted on it to you？ I had no returnnot even the blow…pipe。 How； then； can I get me a wife？〃
He； like the othersdull…witted savage that he washad come to the belief that I was incapable of the cunning and duplicity they practiced。 I could not see a green parrot sitting silent and motionless amidst the green foliage as they could； 1 had not their preternatural keenness of sight； and； in like manner； to deceive with lies and false seeming was their faculty and not mine。 He fell readily into the trap。 My return to practical subjects pleased him。 He bade me hope that Oalava might yet be mine in spite of my poverty。 It was not always necessary to have things to get a wife： to be able to maintain her wa
