the call of the canyon-第42章

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e　New　York　at　once？〃

〃I　surely　will。　It's　an　awful　place。　Two　years　ago　when　I　came　here　with　my　company　I　thought　it　was　grand。　But　I　guess　I　lost　something　over　there。　。　。　。　I　want　to　be　where　it's　quiet。　Where　I　won't　see　many　people。〃

〃I　think　I　understand；〃　returned　Carley。　〃Then　I　suppose　you're　in　a　hurry　to　get　home？　Of　course　you　have　a　girl　you're　just　dying　to　see？〃

〃No；　I'm　sorry　to　say　I　haven't；〃　he　replied；　simply。　〃I　was　glad　I　didn't　have　to　leave　a　sweetheart　behind；　when　I　went　to　France。　But　it　wouldn't　be　so　bad　to　have　one　to　go　back　to　now。〃

〃Don't　you　worry！〃　exclaimed　Carley。　〃You　can　take　your　choice　presently。　You　have　the　open　sesame　to　every　real　American　girl's　heart。〃

〃And　what　is　that？〃　he　asked；　with　a　blush。

〃Your　service　to　your　country；〃　she　said；　gravely。

〃Well；〃　he　said；　with　a　singular　bluntness；　〃considering　I　didn't　get　any　medals　or　bonuses；　I'd　like　to　draw　a　nice　girl。〃

〃You　will；〃　replied　Carley；　and　made　haste　to　change　the　subject。　〃By　the　way；　did　you　meet　Glenn　Kilbourne　in　France？〃

〃Not　that　I　remember；〃　rejoined　Burton；　as　he　got　up；　rising　rather　stiffly　by　aid　of　his　cane。　〃I　must　go；　Miss　Burch。　Really　I　can't　thank　you　enough。　And　I'll　never　forget　it。〃

〃Will　you　write　me　how　you　are　getting　along？〃　asked　Carley；　offering　her　hand。

〃Yes。〃

Carley　moved　with　him　out　into　the　hall　and　to　the　door。　There　was　a　question　she　wanted　to　ask；　but　found　it　strangely　difficult　of　utterance。　At　the　door　Burton　fixed　a　rather　penetrating　gaze　upon　her。

〃You　didn't　ask　me　about　Rust；〃　he　said。

〃No；　II　didn't　think　of　himuntil　now；　in　fact；〃　Carley　lied。

〃Of　course　then　you　couldn't　have　heard　about　him。　I　was　wondering。〃

〃I　have　heard　nothing。〃

〃It　was　Rust　who　told　me　to　come　to　you；〃　said　Burton。　〃We　were　talking　one　day；　and　hewell；　he　thought　you　were　true　blue。　He　said　he　knew　you'd　trust　me　and　lend　me　money。　I　couldn't　have　asked　you　but　for　him。〃

〃True　blue！　He　believed　that。　I'm　glad。　。　。　。　Has　he　spoken　of　me　to　you　since　I　was　last　at　the　hospital？〃

〃Hardly；〃　replied　Burton；　with　the　straight；　strange　glance　on　her　again。

Carley　met　this　glance　and　suddenly　a　coldness　seemed　to　envelop　her。　It　did　not　seem　to　come　from　within　though　her　heart　stopped　beating。　Burton　had　not　changedthe　warmth；　the　gratitude　still　lingered　about　him。　But　the　light　of　his　eyes！　Carley　had　seen　it　in　Glenn's；　in　Rust'sa　strange；　questioning；　far…off　light；　infinitely　aloof　and　unutterably　sad。　Then　there　came　a　lift　of　her　heart　that　released　a　pang。　She　whispered　with　dread；　with　a　tremor；　with　an　instinct　of　calamity。

〃How　aboutRust？〃

〃He's　dead。〃


The　winter　came；　with　its　bleak　sea　winds　and　cold　rains　and　blizzards　of　snow。　Carley　did　not　go　South。　She　read　and　brooded；　and　gradually　avoided　all　save　those　true　friends　who　tolerated　her。

She　went　to　the　theater　a　good　deal；　showing　preference　for　the　drama　of　strife；　and　she　did　not　go　anywhere　for　amusement。　Distraction　and　amusement　seemed　to　be　dead　issues　for　her。　But　she　could　become　absorbed　in　any　argument　on　the　good　or　evil　of　the　present　day。　Socialism　reached　into　her　mind；　to　be　rejected。　She　had　never　understood　it　clearly；　but　it　seemed　to　her　a　state　of　mind　where　dissatisfied　men　and　women　wanted　to　share　what　harder　working　or　more　gifted　people　possessed。　There　were　a　few　who　had　too　much　of　the　world's　goods　and　many　who　had　too　little。　A　readjustment　of　such　inequality　and　injustice　must　come；　but　Carley　did　not　see　the　remedy　in　Socialism。

She　devoured　books　on　the　war　with　a　morbid　curiosity　and　hope　that　she　would　find　some　illuminating　truth　as　to　the　uselessness　of　sacrificing　young　men　in　the　glory　and　prime　of　their　lives。　To　her　war　appeared　a　matter　of　human　nature　rather　than　politics。　Hate　really　was　an　effect　of　war。　In　her　judgment　future　wars　could　be　avoided　only　in　two　waysby　men　becoming　honest　and　just　or　by　women　refusing　to　have　children　to　be　sacrificed。　As　there　seemed　no　indication　whatever　of　the　former；　she　wondered　how　soon　all　women　of　all　races　would　meet　on　a　common　height；　with　the　mounting　spirit　that　consumed　her　own　heart。　Such　time　must　come。　She　granted　every　argument　for　war　and　flung　against　it　one　ringing　passionate　truthagony　of　mangled　soldiers　and　agony　of　women　and　children。　There　was　no　justification　for　offensive　war。　It　was　monstrous　and　hideous。　If　nature　and　evolution　proved　the　absolute　need　of　strife；　war；　blood；　and　death　in　the　progress　of　animal　and　man　toward　perfection；　then　it　would　be　better　to　abandon　this　Christless　code　and　let　the　race　of　man　die　out。

All　through　these　weeks　she　longed　for　a　letter　from　Glenn。　But　it　did　not　come。　Had　he　finally　roused　to　the　sweetness　and　worth　and　love　of　the　western　girl；　Flo　Hutter？　Carley　knew　absolutely；　through　both　intelligence　and　intuition；　that　Glenn　Kilbourne　would　never　love　Flo。　Yet　such　was　her　intensity　and　stress　at　times；　especially　in　the　darkness　of　waking　hours；　that　jealousy　overcame　her　and　insidiously　worked　its　havoc。　Peace　and　a　strange　kind　of　joy　came　to　her　in　dreams　of　her　walks　and　rides　and　climbs　in　Arizona；　of　the　lonely　canyon　where　it　always　seemed　afternoon；　of　the　tremendous　colored　vastness　of　that　Painted　Desert。　But　she　resisted　these　dreams　now　because　when　she　awoke　from　them　she　suffered　such　a　yearning　that　it　became　unbearable。　Then　she　knew　the　feeling　of　the　loneliness　and　solitude　of　the　hills。　Then　she　knew　the　sweetness　of　the　murmur　of　falling　water；　the　wind　in　the　pines；　the　song　of　birds；　the　white　radiance　of　the　stars；　the　break　of　day　and　its　gold…flushed　close。　But　she　had　not　yet　divined'　their　meaning。　It　was　not　all　love　for　Glenn　Kilbourne。　Had　city　life　palled　upon　her　solely　because　of　the　absence　of　her　lover？　So　Carley　plodded　on；　like　one　groping　in　the　night；　fighting　shadows。

One　day　she　received　a　card　from　an　old　schoolmate；　a　girl　who　had　married　out　of　Carley's　set；　and　had　been　ostracized。　She　was　living　down　on　Long　Island；　at　a　little　country　place　named　Wading　River。　Her　husband　was　an　electriciansomething　of　an　inventor。　He　worked　hard。　A　baby　boy　had　just　come　to　them。　Would　not　Carley　run　down　on　the　train　to　see　the　youngster？

That　was　a　strong　and　trenchant　call。　Carley　went。　She　found　indeed　a　country　village；　and　on　the　outskirts　of　it　a　little　cottage　that　must　have　been　pretty　in　summer；　when　the　green　was　on　vines　and　trees。　Her　old　schoolmate　was　rosy；　plump；　bright…eyed；　and　happy。　She　saw　in　Carley　no　changea　fact　that　somehow　rebounded　sweetly　on　Carley's　consciousness。　Elsie　prattled　of　herself　and　her　husband　and　how　they　had　worked　to　earn　this　little　home；　and　then　the　baby。

When　Carley　saw　the　adorable　dark…eyed；　pink…toed；　curly…fisted　baby　she　understood　Elsie's　happiness　and　reveled　in　it。　When　she　felt　the　soft；　warm；　living　little　body　in　her　arms；　against　her　breast；　then　she　absorbed　some　incalculable　and　mysterious　strength。　What　were　the　trivial；　sordid；　and　selfish　feelings　that　kept　her　in　tumult　compared　to　this　welling　emotion？　Had　she　the　secret　in　her　arms？　Babies　and　Carley　had　never　become　closely　acquainted　in　those　infrequent　meetings　that　were　usually　the　result　of　chance。　But　Elsie's　baby　nestled　to　her　breast　and　cooed　to　her　and　clung　to　her　finger。　When　at　length　the　youngster　was　laid　in　his　crib　it　seemed　to　Carley　that　the　fragrance　and　the　soul　of　him　remained　with　her。

〃A　real　American　boy！〃　she　murmured。

〃You　can　just　bet　he　is；〃　replied　Elsie。　〃Carley；　you　ought　to　see　his　dad。〃

〃I'd　like　to　meet　him；〃　said　Carley；　thoughtfully。　〃Elsie；　was　he　in　the　service？〃

〃Yes。　He　was　on　one　of　the　navy　transports　that　took　munitions　to　France。　Think　of　me；　carrying　this　baby；　with　my　husband　on　a　boat　full　of　explosives　and　with　German　submarines　roaming　the　ocean！　Oh；　it　was　horrible！〃

〃But　he　came　back；　and　now　all's　well　with　you；〃　said　Carley；　with　a　smile　of　earnestness。　〃I'm　very　glad；　Elsie。〃

〃Yesbut　I　shudder　when　I　think　of　a　possible　war　in　the　future。　I'm　going　to　raise　boys；　and　girls；　too；　I　hopeand　the　thought　of　war　is　torturing。〃

Carley　found　her　return　train　somewhat　late；　and　she　took　advantage　of