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第72章

zanoni-第72章

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influence the happiness of others; how mysteriously the shadows

thicken round our own future doom!  We cannot be prophets to

ourselves!  With what trembling hope I nurse the thought that I

may preserve to my solitude the light of a living smile!



。。。



Extracts from Letter II。



Deeming myself not pure enough to initiate so pure a heart; I

invoke to her trance those fairest and most tender inhabitants of

space that have furnished to poetry; which is the instinctive

guess into creation; the ideas of the Glendoveer and Sylph。  And

these were less pure than her own thoughts; and less tender than

her own love!  They could not raise her above her human heart;

for THAT has a heaven of its own。



。。。



I have just looked on her in sleep;I have heard her breathe my

name。  Alas! that which is so sweet to others has its bitterness

to me; for I think how soon the time may come when that sleep

will be without a dream;when the heart that dictates the name

will be cold; and the lips that utter it be dumb。  What a twofold

shape there is in love!  If we examine it coarsely;if we look

but on its fleshy ties; its enjoyments of a moment; its turbulent

fever and its dull reaction;how strange it seems that this

passion should be the supreme mover of the world; that it is this

which has dictated the greatest sacrifices; and influenced all

societies and all times; that to this the loftiest and loveliest

genius has ever consecrated its devotion; that; but for love;

there were no civilisation; no music; no poetry; no beauty; no

life beyond the brute's。



But examine it in its heavenlier shape;in its utter abnegation

of self; in its intimate connection with all that is most

delicate and subtle in the spirit;its power above all that is

sordid in existence; its mastery over the idols of the baser

worship; its ability to create a palace of the cottage; an oasis

in the desert; a summer in the Iceland;where it breathes; and

fertilises; and glows; and the wonder rather becomes how so few

regard it in its holiest nature。  What the sensual call its

enjoyments; are the least of its joys。  True love is less a

passion than a symbol。  Mejnour; shall the time come when I can

speak to thee of Viola as a thing that was?



。。。



Extract from Letter III。



Knowest thou that of late I have sometimes asked myself; 〃Is

there no guilt in the knowledge that has so divided us from our

race?〃  It is true that the higher we ascend the more hateful

seem to us the vices of the short…lived creepers of the earth;

the more the sense of the goodness of the All…good penetrates and

suffuses us; and the more immediately does our happiness seem to

emanate from him。  But; on the other hand; how many virtues must

lie dead in those who live in the world of death; and refuse to

die!  Is not this sublime egotism; this state of abstraction and

reverie;this self…wrapped and self…dependent majesty of

existence; a resignation of that nobility which incorporates our

own welfare; our joys; our hopes; our fears with others?  To live

on in no dread of foes; undegraded by infirmity; secure through

the cares; and free from the disease of flesh; is a spectacle

that captivates our pride。  And yet dost thou not more admire him

who dies for another?  Since I have loved her; Mejnour; it seems

almost cowardice to elude the grave which devours the hearts that

wrap us in their folds。  I feel it;the earth grows upon my

spirit。  Thou wert right; eternal age; serene and passionless; is

a happier boon than eternal youth; with its yearnings and

desires。  Until we can be all spirit; the tranquillity of

solitude must be indifference。



。。。



Extracts from Letter IV。



I have received thy communication。  What! is it so?  Has thy

pupil disappointed thee?  Alas; poor pupil!  But



。。。



(Here follow comments on those passages in Glyndon's life already

known to the reader; or about to be made so; with earnest

adjurations to Mejnour to watch yet over the fate of his

scholar。)



。。。



But I cherish the same desire; with a warmer heart。  My pupil!

how the terrors that shall encompass thine ordeal warn me from

the task!  Once more I will seek the Son of Light。



。。。



Yes; Adon…Ai; long deaf to my call; at last has descended to my

vision; and left behind him the glory of his presence in the

shape of Hope。  Oh; not impossible; Viola;not impossible; that

we yet may be united; soul with soul!



Extract from Letter V。(Many months after the last。)



Mejnour; awake from thine apathy;rejoice!  A new soul will be

born to the world;a new soul that shall call me father。  Ah; if

they for whom exist all the occupations and resources of human

life;if they can thrill with exquisite emotion at the thought

of hailing again their own childhood in the faces of their

children; if in that birth they are born once more into the holy

Innocence which is the first state of existence; if they can feel

that on man devolves almost an angel's duty; when he has a life

to guide from the cradle; and a soul to nurture for the heaven;

what to me must be the rapture to welcome an inheritor of all the

gifts which double themselves in being shared!  How sweet the

power to watch; and to guard;to instil the knowledge; to avert

the evil; and to guide back the river of life in a richer and

broader and deeper stream to the paradise from which it flows!

And beside that river our souls shall meet; sweet mother。  Our

child shall supply the sympathy that fails as yet; and what shape

shall haunt thee; what terror shall dismay; when thy initiation

is beside the cradle of thy child!





CHAPTER 4。XI。



They thus beguile the way

Untill the blustring storme is overblowne;

When weening to returne whence they did stray;

They cannot finde that path which first was showne;

But wander to and fro in waies unknowne。

Spenser's 〃Faerie Queene;〃 book i。 canto i。 st。 x。



Yes; Viola; thou art another being than when; by the threshold of

thy Italian home; thou didst follow thy dim fancies through the

Land of Shadow; or when thou didst vainly seek to give voice to

an ideal beauty; on the boards where illusion counterfeits earth

and heaven for an hour; till the weary sense; awaking; sees but

the tinsel and the scene…shifter。  Thy spirit reposes in its own

happiness。  Its wanderings have found a goal。  In a moment there

often dwells the sense of eternity; for when profoundly happy; we

know that it is impossible to die。  Whenever the soul FEELS

ITSELF; it feels everlasting life。



The initiation is deferred;thy days and nights are left to no

other visions than those with which a contented heart enchants a

guileless fancy。  Glendoveers and Sylphs; pardon me if I question

whether those visions are not lovelier than yourselves。



They stand by the beach; and see the sun sinking into the sea。

How long now have they dwelt on that island?  What matters!it

may be months; or yearswhat matters!  Why should I; or they;

keep account of that happy time?  As in the dream of a moment

ages may seem to pass; so shall we measure transport or woe;by

the length of the dream; or the number of emotions that the dream

involves?



The sun sinks slowly down; the air is arid and oppressive; on the

sea; the stately vessel lies motionless; on the shore; no leaf

trembles on the trees。



Viola drew nearer to Zanoni。  A presentiment she could not define

made her heart beat more quickly; and; looking into his face; she

was struck with its expression:  it was anxious; abstracted;

perturbed。  〃This stillness awes me;〃 she whispered。



Zanoni did not seem to hear her。  He muttered to himself; and his

eyes gazed round restlessly。  She knew not why; but that gaze;

which seemed to pierce into space;that muttered voice in some

foreign languagerevived dimly her earlier superstitions。  She

was more fearful since the hour when she knew that she was to be

a mother。 

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