the use and need of the life of carrie a. nation-第8章

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There　was　quite　a　train　with　the　droves　of　cattle；　mules　and　horses。
One　wagon　had　six　yoke　of　oxen　to　it；　had　to　get　into　it　by　a　ladder；
the　kind　that　was　used　to　freight　across　the　plains。　The　family
went　in　the　family　carriage　that　my　father　brought　from　Kentucky。
I　remember　the　time　when　this　carriage　was　purchased；　with　the　two
dapple　gray　horses；　and　silver　mounted　harness；　and　when　my　mother
would　drive　out　she　had　a　driver　in　broadcloth；　with　a　high　silk　hat；
and　a　boy　rode　on　a　seat　behind；　to　open　the　gates。　This　was　one　of
the　ways　of　traveling　in　Kentucky　in　those　days。　My　mother　was　an
aristocrat　in　her　ideas；　but　my　father　was　not。　He　liked　no　display。　He
was　wise　enough　to　see　the　sin　and　folly　of　it。

｛illust。　caption　=
THIS　IS　THE　PICTURE　OF　MY　GIRLHOOD　HOME　IN　CASS　COUNTY；　MO。
UNDER　THE　TREES　OF　THIS　DEAR　OLD　PLACE　I　LISTENED
TO　THE　SWEET　STORY　OF　MY　LOVE　OF　A　MAN　MURDERED　BY　DRINK。
〃WHEN　THOU　HAST　LOVED　ONE　LIVING　MAN；　THEN　MAYEST　THOU　LOOK
UPON　THE　DEAD。〃｝


After　being　on　the　road　six　weeks；　we　stopped　in　Grayson　County；
Texas；　and　bought　a　farm。　As　we　started　from　Missouri　one　of　the
colored　women　took　sick　with　typhoid　fever。　This　spread　so　that　ten
of　the　family；　white；　and　black；　were　down　at　one　time。　As　soon　as　we
could　travel；　my　father　left　the　colored　people　south；　and　took　his　family
back　to　Missouri。　That　winter　south　was　a　great　blessing　to　me；　for　I
recovered　from　a　disease　that　had　made　me　an　invalid　for　five　years
consumption　of　the　bowels。　Poor　health　had　keep　me　out　of　school　a
great　deal。　My　father　at　one　time　sent　me　to　Mrs。　Tillery's　boarding
school　in　Independence；　Mo。；　but　I　was　not　in　the　recitation　room　more
than　half　of　the　time。

After　I　recovered　my　health　in　Texas；　it　was　my　delight　to　ride　on
horseback　with　a　girl　friend。　The　southern　boys　were　preparing　to　go　to
war。　Many　a　sewing　did　we　attend；　where　the　mothers　had　spun　and
woven　the　gray　cloth　that　they　were　now　working　up　so　sorrowfully　for
their　sons　to　be　buried　in；　far　away　from　home。　They　thought　their　cause
was　right。　There　were　many　good　masters。　And　again　there　were　bad
ones。　Whiskey　is　always　a　cruel　tyrant　and　is　a　worse　evil　than　chattel
slavery。　We　were　often　stopped　on　our　trip　by　southern　troops；　in　the
Territory　and　Texas；　and　then　again　by　northerners。　We　passed　over　the
Pea　Ridge　battle　ground　shortly　after　the　battle。　Oh！　the　horrors　of　war。
We　often　stopped　at　houses　where　the　wounded　were。　We　let　them　have
our　pillows　and　every　bit　of　bedding　we　could　spare。　We　went　to　our
home　in　Cass　County；　Missouri。

Shortly　after　this　we；　with　all　families　living　in　that　country；　were
commanded　by　an　order　from　Jim　Lane；　to　move　into　an　army　post。　This
reached　several　counties　in　Missouri。　It　was　done　to　depopulate　the
country；　so　that　the　〃Bushwhackers〃　would　be　forced　to　leave；　because　of
not　being　able　to　get　food　from　the　citizens。　This　caused　much　suffering。
But　such　is　war。　We　moved　to　Kansas　City。　I　was　in　Independence；　Mo。；
during　the　battle；　when　Price　came　through。　I　went　with　a　good　woman
to　the　hospital　to　help　with　the　wounded。　My　duty　was　to　comb　the
heads　of　the　wounded。　I　had　a　pan　of　scalding　water　near　and　would　use
the　comb　and　shake　off　the　animated　nature　into　the　hot　water。　The　southern
and　northern　wounded　were　in　the　same　rooms。　In　health　they　were
enemies；　but　I　only　saw　kindly　feeling　and　sympathy。

Mothers　ought　to　give　their　daughters　the　experience　of　sitting　with
the　sick；　of　preparing　food　for　them；　of　binding　up　wounds。　It　is　a　pitiful
sight　to　see　a　helpless　woman　in　the　sick　room；　ignorant　through　lack
of　experience　and　education；　of　ways　to　be　useful　at　the　time　and　place
where　these　characteristics　of　woman　adorn　her　the　most　of　all　others。

After　we　returned　from　Texas；　being　the　oldest　child　and　the　servants　all
gone；　my　mother　sick；　and　the　younger　children　going　to
school；　I　had　the　house　work；　cooking　and　most　of　the　washing　to　do。　It
was　a　new　experience　for　me；　and　it　was　twice　as　hard　as　it　ought　to　have
been。　I　exposed　my　health；　would　slop　up　myself　when　I　washed；　and
almost　ruined　my　health；　because　I　had　not　been　properly　educated。　Herein
was　the　curse　of　slavery。　My　father　saw　this；　and　I　don't　believe　he
had　a　regret　when　the　slaves　were　free。　Mother；　it　matters　not　what　else
you　teach　your　daughters；　if　they　have　not　an　experience　in　doing　the
work　themselves　about　a　home；　they　are　sadly　deficient。　It　is　not　the　soft；
palefaced；　painted；　fashionable　lady　we　want；　for　the　world　would　be　better
without　her；　but　the　woman　capable　of　knowing　how；　and　willing　to　take
a　place　in　the　home　affairs　of　life。　It　is　an　ambition　of　mine　to　establish
a　Preparatory　College　in　Topeka；　Kansas；　where　girls　may　be　taught；　as
women　should　be；　that　they　in　turn　may　teach　others；　how　to　wash；　cook；
scrub；　dress　and　talk；　to　counteract　the　idea　that　woman　is　a　toy；　pretty
doll；　with　no　will　power　of　her　own；　only　a　parrot；　a　parasite　of　a
man。　To　be　womanly；　means　strength　of　character；　virtue　and　a　power
for　good。　Let　your　women　be　teachers　of　good　things；　says　the　Holy
Spirit。

The　last　school　I　attended　was　at　Liberty；　Missouri；　taught　by　Mr。
and　Mrs。　Love。　Only　went　there　a　year；　but　it　was　of　untold　value　to　me。
I　was　so　eager　to　get　an　education。　On　account　of　ill　health　and　the　war；
I　knew　but　little。　I　wanted　a　thorough　education。　I　had　read　a　good
many　books；　and　would　write　sketches；　kept　a　diary　part　of　the　time。

I　will　here　relate　an　incident　that　will　give　my　readers　a　little　insight
into　my　impulses。　At　Liberty　School　we　had　a　class　in　Smellie's　Natural
Philosophy。〃　There　was　an　argument　among　the　girls。　Some　said
animals　had　reasoning　faculties。　Others　said　not。　Miss　Jennie　Johnson；
our　teacher；　said：　〃Have　that　for　a　question　to　debate　on　in　your　society。〃
So　it　was　ordered。　I　was　given　the　affirmative。　The　Friday　came。
I　was　taken　by　surprise　and　was　in　confusion；　when　I　saw　the　room
crowded。　The　two　other　societies　of　the　Seminary；　〃The　Mary　Lyons〃
and　〃Rising　Star；〃　also　all　the　teachers；　were　present。　Our　Society　was
the　〃Eunomian〃。　I　had　made　no　preparations。　When　I　was　called　I
know　I　looked　ridiculously　blank。　The　president　tried　to　keep　her　face
straight。　I　got　no　farther　than；　〃Miss　President〃。　All　burst　out　in
uncontrollable　laughter。　I　went　to　my　seat　put　my　face　in　my　arms　and
turned　my　back　to　the　audience。　I　wept　with　tears　of　humiliation。　I
felt　disgraced。　I　thought　of　what　a　shame　this　would　be　to　my　parents。
How　ever　after　this　I　must　be　considered　a　〃Silly〃　by　my　schoolmates。
These　things　nerved　me。　I　dried　my　tears；　turned　around　in　my　seat；
looked　up；　and　the　moral　force　it　required　to　do　this　was　almost　equal
to　that　which　smashed　a　saloon。　I　arose　and　said：　〃Miss　President；　I
am　ready　to　state　my　case。〃　I　began　in　this　style：　〃I　know　animals
have　the　power　to　reason　for　my　brothers　cured　a　dog　from　sucking　eggs
by　having　him　take　a　hot　one　in　his　mouth；　and　it　was　the　last　egg　we
ever　knew　him　to　pick　up。　Why？　Because　he　remembered　the　hot　one
and　reasoned　that　he　might　get　burned。　Why　is　it　that　a　horse　will　like
one　person　more　than　another？　Because　he　is　capable　of　reasoning　and
knows　who　is　the　best　to　him。〃　I　went　on　in　this　homely　style　and　spoke
with　a　vehemence　which　said：　〃I　will　make　my　point；〃　which　I　did
amidst　the　cheers　of　the　school。　I　was　eighteen　at　this　time　and　you
would　say：　〃You　must　have　been　rather　green。〃　So　I　was　in　some
things。

I　believe　I　have　always　failed　in　everything　I　undertook　to　do　the
first　time；　but　I　learned　only　by　experience；　paid　dearly　for　it；　and　valued
it　afterwards。　My　failures　have　been　my　best　teachers。　I　see　no　one
more　awkward　than　I　once　was；　but　I　had　determined　to　conquer。　My
defects　were　the　great　incentives　to　perseverance；　when　I　felt　I　was　right。

I　shall　not　in　this　book　speak　much　of　my　love　affairs；　but　they　were；
nevertheless；　an　important　part　of　my　life。　I　was　a　great　lover。　I　used
to　think　a　person　never　could　love　but　once　in　this　life；　but　I　often　now
say；　I　would　not　want　a　heart　that　could　hold　but　one　love。　It　was　not
the　beauty　of　face　or　form　that　was　the　mo