the unbearable bassington-第32章

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leaving　so　soon。







CHAPTER　XV







ELAINE　YOUGHAL　sat　at　lunch　in　the　Speise　Saal　of　one　of　Vienna's　

costlier　hotels。　　The　double…headed　eagle；　with　its　〃K。u。K。〃　

legend；　everywhere　met　the　eye　and　announced　the　imperial　favour　in　

which　the　establishment　basked。　　Some　several　square　yards　of　

yellow　bunting；　charged　with　the　image　of　another　double…headed　

eagle；　floating　from　the　highest　flag…staff　above　the　building；　

betrayed　to　the　initiated　the　fact　that　a　Russian　Grand　Duke　was　

concealed　somewhere　on　the　premises。　　Unannounced　by　heraldic　

symbolism　but　unconcealable　by　reason　of　nature's　own　blazonry；　

were　several　citizens　and　citizenesses　of　the　great　republic　of　the　

Western　world。　　One　or　two　Cobdenite　members　of　the　British　

Parliament　engaged　in　the　useful　task　of　proving　that　the　cost　of　

living　in　Vienna　was　on　an　exorbitant　scale；　flitted　with　

restrained　importance　through　a　land　whose　fatness　they　had　come　to　

spy　out；　every　fancied　over…charge　in　their　bills　was　welcome　as　

providing　another　nail　in　the　coffin　of　their　fiscal　opponents。　　It　

is　the　glory　of　democracies　that　they　may　be　misled　but　never　

driven。　　Here　and　there；　like　brave　deeds　in　a　dust…patterned　

world；　flashed　and　glittered　the　sumptuous　uniforms　of　

representatives　of　the　Austrian　military　caste。　　Also　in　evidence；　

at　discreet　intervals；　were　stray　units　of　the　Semetic　tribe　that　

nineteen　centuries　of　European　neglect　had　been　unable　to　mislay。



Elaine　sitting　with　Courtenay　at　an　elaborately　appointed　luncheon　

table；　gay　with　high　goblets　of　Bohemian　glassware；　was　mistress　of　

three　discoveries。　　First；　to　her　disappointment；　that　if　you　

frequent　the　more　expensive　hotels　of　Europe　you　must　be　prepared　

to　find；　in　whatever　country　you　may　chance　to　be　staying；　a　

depressing　international　likeness　between　them　all。　　Secondly；　to　

her　relief；　that　one　is　not　expected　to　be　sentimentally　amorous　

during　a　modern　honeymoon。　　Thirdly；　rather　to　her　dismay；　that　

Courtenay　Youghal　did　not　necessarily　expect　her　to　be　markedly　

affectionate　in　private。　　Someone　had　described　him；　after　their　

marriage；　as　one　of　Nature's　bachelors；　and　she　began　to　see　how　

aptly　the　description　fitted　him。



〃Will　those　Germans　on　our　left　never　stop　talking？〃　she　asked；　as　

an　undying　flow　of　Teutonic　small　talk　rattled　and　jangled　across　

the　intervening　stretch　of　carpet。　　〃Not　one　of　those　three　women　

has　ceased　talking　for　an　instant　since　we've　been　sitting　here。〃



〃They　will　presently；　if　only　for　a　moment；〃　said　Courtenay；　〃when　

the　dish　you　have　ordered　comes　in　there　will　be　a　deathly　silence　

at　the　next　table。　　No　German　can　see　a　PLAT　brought　in　for　someone　

else　without　being　possessed　with　a　great　fear　that　it　represents　a　

more　toothsome　morsel　or　a　better　money's　worth　than　what　he　has　

ordered　for　himself。〃



The　exuberant　Teutonic　chatter　was　balanced　on　the　other　side　of　

the　room　by　an　even　more　penetrating　conversation　unflaggingly　

maintained　by　a　party　of　Americans；　who　were　sitting　in　judgment　on　

the　cuisine　of　the　country　they　were　passing　through；　and　finding　

few　extenuating　circumstances。



〃What　Mr。　Lonkins　wants　is　a　real　DEEP　cherry　pie；〃　announced　a　

lady　in　a　tone　of　dramatic　and　honest　conviction。



〃Why；　yes；　that　is　so；〃　corroborated　a　gentleman　who　was　apparently　

the　Mr。　Lonkins　in　question；　〃a　real　DEEP　cherry　pie。〃



〃We　had　the　same　trouble　way　back　in　Paris；〃　proclaimed　another　

lady；　〃little　Jerome　and　the　girls　don't　want　to　eat　any　more　CREME　

RENVERSEE。　　I'd　give　anything　if　they　could　get　some　real　cherry　

pie。〃



〃Real　DEEP　cherry　pie；〃　assented　Mr。　Lonkins。



〃Way　down　in　Ohio　we　used　to　have　peach　pie　that　was　real　good；〃　

said　Mrs。　Lonkins；　turning　on　a　tap　of　reminiscence　that　presently　

flowed　to　a　cascade。　　The　subject　of　pies　seemed　to　lend　itself　to　

indefinite　expansion。



〃Do　those　people　think　of　nothing　but　their　food？〃　asked　Elaine；　as　

the　virtues　of　roasted　mutton　suddenly　came　to　the　fore　and　

received　emphatic　recognition；　even　the　absent　and　youthful　Jerome　

being　quoted　in　its　favour。



〃On　the　contrary；〃　said　Courtenay；　〃they　are　a　widely…travelled　

set；　and　the　man　has　had　a　notably　interesting　career。　　It　is　a　

form　of　home…sickness　with　them　to　discuss　and　lament　the　cookery　

and　foods　that　they've　never　had　the　leisure　to　stay　at　home　and　

digest。　　The　Wandering　Jew　probably　babbled　unremittingly　about　

some　breakfast　dish　that　took　so　long　to　prepare　that　he　had　never　

time　to　eat　it。〃



A　waiter　deposited　a　dish　of　Wiener　Nierenbraten　in　front　of　

Elaine。　　At　the　same　moment　a　magic　hush　fell　upon　the　three　German　

ladies　at　the　adjoining　table；　and　the　flicker　of　a　great　fear　

passed　across　their　eyes。　　Then　they　burst　forth　again　into　

tumultuous　chatter。　　Courtenay　had　proved　a　reliable　prophet。



Almost　at　the　same　moment　as　the　luncheon…dish　appeared　on　the　

scene；　two　ladies　arrived　at　a　neighbouring　table；　and　bowed　with　

dignified　cordiality　to　Elaine　and　Courtenay。　　They　were　two　of　the　

more　worldly　and　travelled　of　Elaine's　extensive　stock　of　aunts；　

and　they　happened　to　be　making　a　short　stay　at　the　same　hotel　as　

the　young　couple。　　They　were　far　too　correct　and　rationally　minded　

to　intrude　themselves　on　their　niece；　but　it　was　significant　of　

Elaine's　altered　view　as　to　the　sanctity　of　honeymoon　life　that　she　

secretly　rather　welcomed　the　presence　of　her　two　relatives　in　the　

hotel；　and　had　found　time　and　occasion　to　give　them　more　of　her　

society　than　she　would　have　considered　necessary　or　desirable　a　few　

weeks　ago。　　The　younger　of　the　two　she　rather　liked；　in　a　

restrained　fashion；　as　one　likes　an　unpretentious　watering…place　or　

a　restaurant　that　does　not　try　to　give　one　a　musical　education　in　

addition　to　one's　dinner。　　One　felt　instinctively　about　her　that　

she　would　never　wear　rather　more　valuable　diamonds　than　any　other　

woman　in　the　room；　and　would　never　be　the　only　person　to　be　saved　

in　a　steamboat　disaster　or　hotel　fire。　　As　a　child　she　might　have　

been　perfectly　well　able　to　recite　〃On　Linden　when　the　sun　was　

low；〃　but　one　felt　certain　that　nothing　ever　induced　her　to　do　so。　　

The　elder　aunt；　Mrs。　Goldbrook；　did　not　share　her　sister's　

character　as　a　human　rest…cure；　most　people　found　her　rather　

disturbing；　chiefly；　perhaps；　from　her　habit　of　asking　unimportant　

questions　with　enormous　solemnity。　　Her　manner　of　enquiring　after　a　

trifling　ailment　gave　one　the　impression　that　she　was　more　

concerned　with　the　fortunes　of　the　malady　than　with　oneself；　and　

when　one　got　rid　of　a　cold　one　felt　that　she　almost　expected　to　be　

given　its　postal　address。　　Probably　her　manner　was　merely　the　

defensive　outwork　of　an　innate　shyness；　but　she　was　not　a　woman　who　

commanded　confidences。



〃A　telephone　call　for　Courtenay；〃　commented　the　younger　of　the　two　

women　as　Youghal　hurriedly　flashed　through　the　room；　〃the　telephone　

system　seems　to　enter　very　largely　into　that　young　man's　life。〃



〃The　telephone　has　robbed　matrimony　of　most　of　its　sting；〃　said　the　

elder；　〃so　much　more　discreet　than　pen　and　ink　communications　which　

get　read　by　the　wrong　people。〃



Elaine's　aunts　were　conscientiously　worldly；　they　were　the　natural　

outcome　of　a　stock　that　had　been　conscientiously　straight…laced　for　

many　generations。



Elaine　had　progressed　to　the　pancake　stage　before　Courtenay　

returned。



〃Sorry　to　be　away　so　long；〃　he　said；　〃but　I've　arranged　something　

rather　nice　for　to…night。　　There's　rather　a　jolly　masquerade　ball　

on。　　I've　'phoned　about　getting　a　costume　for　you　and　it's　alright。　　

It　will　suit　you　beautifully；　and　I've　got　my　harlequin　dress　with　

me。　　Madame　Kelnicort；　excellent　soul；　is　going　to　chaperone　you；　

and　she'll　take　you　back　any　time　you　like；　I'm　quite　unreliable　

when　I　get　into　fancy　dress。　　I　shall　probably　keep　going　til