the turn of the screw-第9章

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He　died。〃



〃Died？〃　　I　almost　shrieked。



She　seemed　fairly　to　square　herself；　plant　herself　more　firmly　to　utter

the　wonder　of　it。　　〃Yes。　　Mr。　Quint　is　dead。〃







　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　VI





It　took　of　course　more　than　that　particular　passage　to　place　us

together　in　presence　of　what　we　had　now　to　live　with　as　we　could

my　dreadful　liability　to　impressions　of　the　order　so　vividly

exemplified；　and　my　companion's　knowledge；　hencefortha　knowledge

half　consternation　and　half　compassionof　that　liability。

There　had　been；　this　evening；　after　the　revelation　left　me；

for　an　hour；　so　prostratethere　had　been；　for　either　of　us；

no　attendance　on　any　service　but　a　little　service　of　tears　and　vows；

of　prayers　and　promises；　a　climax　to　the　series　of　mutual　challenges

and　pledges　that　had　straightway　ensued　on　our　retreating　together　to

the　schoolroom　and　shutting　ourselves　up　there　to　have　everything　out。

The　result　of　our　having　everything　out　was　simply　to　reduce

our　situation　to　the　last　rigor　of　its　elements。　　She　herself　had

seen　nothing；　not　the　shadow　of　a　shadow；　and　nobody　in　the　house

but　the　governess　was　in　the　governess's　plight；　yet　she　accepted

without　directly　impugning　my　sanity　the　truth　as　I　gave　it　to　her；

and　ended　by　showing　me；　on　this　ground；　an　awestricken　tenderness；

an　expression　of　the　sense　of　my　more　than　questionable　privilege；

of　which　the　very　breath　has　remained　with　me　as　that　of　the　sweetest

of　human　charities。



What　was　settled　between　us；　accordingly；　that　night；　was　that　we

thought　we　might　bear　things　together；　and　I　was　not　even　sure　that；

in　spite　of　her　exemption；　it　was　she　who　had　the　best　of　the　burden。

I　knew　at　this　hour；　I　think；　as　well　as　I　knew　later；　what　I　was

capable　of　meeting　to　shelter　my　pupils；　but　it　took　me　some　time

to　be　wholly　sure　of　what　my　honest　ally　was　prepared　for　to　keep

terms　with　so　compromising　a　contract。　　I　was　queer　company　enough

quite　as　queer　as　the　company　I　received；　but　as　I　trace　over

what　we　went　through　I　see　how　much　common　ground　we　must　have

found　in　the　one　idea　that；　by　good　fortune；　COULD　steady　us。

It　was　the　idea；　the　second　movement；　that　led　me　straight　out；

as　I　may　say；　of　the　inner　chamber　of　my　dread。　　I　could　take

the　air　in　the　court；　at　least；　and　there　Mrs。　Grose　could　join　me。

Perfectly　can　I　recall　now　the　particular　way　strength　came　to　me

before　we　separated　for　the　night。　　We　had　gone　over　and　over　every

feature　of　what　I　had　seen。



〃He　was　looking　for　someone　else；　you　saysomeone　who　was　not　you？〃



〃He　was　looking　for　little　Miles。〃　　A　portentous　clearness　now　possessed　me。

〃THAT'S　whom　he　was　looking　for。〃



〃But　how　do　you　know？〃



〃I　know；　I　know；　I　know！〃　　My　exaltation　grew。　　〃And　YOU　know；　my　dear！〃



She　didn't　deny　this；　but　I　required；　I　felt；　not　even　so　much

telling　as　that。　　She　resumed　in　a　moment；　at　any　rate：

〃What　if　HE　should　see　him？〃



〃Little　Miles？　　That's　what　he　wants！〃



She　looked　immensely　scared　again。　　〃The　child？〃



〃Heaven　forbid！　　The　man。　　He　wants　to　appear　to　THEM。〃

That　he　might　was　an　awful　conception；　and　yet；　somehow；　I　could

keep　it　at　bay；　which；　moreover；　as　we　lingered　there；

was　what　I　succeeded　in　practically　proving。　　I　had　an　absolute

certainty　that　I　should　see　again　what　I　had　already　seen；

but　something　within　me　said　that　by　offering　myself　bravely

as　the　sole　subject　of　such　experience；　by　accepting；　by　inviting；

by　surmounting　it　all；　I　should　serve　as　an　expiatory　victim

and　guard　the　tranquility　of　my　companions。　　The　children；

in　especial；　I　should　thus　fence　about　and　absolutely　save。

I　recall　one　of　the　last　things　I　said　that　night　to　Mrs。　Grose。



〃It　does　strike　me　that　my　pupils　have　never　mentioned〃



She　looked　at　me　hard　as　I　musingly　pulled　up。　　〃His　having　been

here　and　the　time　they　were　with　him？〃



〃The　time　they　were　with　him；　and　his　name；　his　presence；　his　history；

in　any　way。〃



〃Oh；　the　little　lady　doesn't　remember。　　She　never　heard　or　knew。〃



〃The　circumstances　of　his　death？〃　　I　thought　with　some　intensity。

〃Perhaps　not。　　But　Miles　would　rememberMiles　would　know。〃



〃Ah；　don't　try　him！〃　broke　from　Mrs。　Grose。



I　returned　her　the　look　she　had　given　me。　　〃Don't　be　afraid。〃

I　continued　to　think。　　〃It　IS　rather　odd。〃



〃That　he　has　never　spoken　of　him？〃



〃Never　by　the　least　allusion。　　And　you　tell　me　they　were　‘great　friends'？〃



〃Oh；　it　wasn't　HIM！〃　Mrs。　Grose　with　emphasis　declared。

〃It　was　Quint's　own　fancy。　　To　play　with　him；　I　mean

to　spoil　him。〃　　She　paused　a　moment；　then　she　added：

〃Quint　was　much　too　free。〃



This　gave　me；　straight　from　my　vision　of　his　faceSUCH　a　face！

a　sudden　sickness　of　disgust。　　〃Too　free　with　MY　boy？〃



〃Too　free　with　everyone！〃



I　forbore；　for　the　moment；　to　analyze　this　description　further　than

by　the　reflection　that　a　part　of　it　applied　to　several　of　the　members

of　the　household；　of　the　half…dozen　maids　and　men　who　were　still

of　our　small　colony。　　But　there　was　everything；　for　our　apprehension；

in　the　lucky　fact　that　no　discomfortable　legend；　no　perturbation

of　scullions；　had　ever；　within　anyone's　memory　attached　to　the　kind

old　place。　　It　had　neither　bad　name　nor　ill　fame；　and　Mrs。　Grose；

most　apparently；　only　desired　to　cling　to　me　and　to　quake　in　silence。

I　even　put　her；　the　very　last　thing　of　all；　to　the　test。　　It　was　when；

at　midnight；　she　had　her　hand　on　the　schoolroom　door　to　take　leave。

〃I　have　it　from　you　thenfor　it's　of　great　importancethat　he　was

definitely　and　admittedly　bad？〃



〃Oh；　not　admittedly。　　_I_　knew　itbut　the　master　didn't。〃



〃And　you　never　told　him？〃



〃Well；　he　didn't　like　tale…bearinghe　hated　complaints。

He　was　terribly　short　with　anything　of　that　kind；　and　if　people

were　all　right　to　HIM〃



〃He　wouldn't　be　bothered　with　more？〃　　This　squared　well　enough

with　my　impressions　of　him：　　he　was　not　a　trouble…loving　gentleman；

nor　so　very　particular　perhaps　about　some　of　the　company　HE　kept。

All　the　same；　I　pressed　my　interlocutress。　　〃I　promise　you　_I_

would　have　told！〃



She　felt　my　discrimination。　　〃I　daresay　I　was　wrong。

But；　really；　I　was　afraid。〃



〃Afraid　of　what？〃



〃Of　things　that　man　could　do。　　Quint　was　so　cleverhe　was　so　deep。〃



I　took　this　in　still　more　than；　probably；　I　showed。

〃You　weren't　afraid　of　anything　else？　　Not　of　his　effect？〃



〃His　effect？〃　she　repeated　with　a　face　of　anguish　and　waiting

while　I　faltered。



〃On　innocent　little　precious　lives。　　They　were　in　your　charge。〃



〃No；　they　were　not　in　mine！〃　she　roundly　and　distressfully　returned。

〃The　master　believed　in　him　and　placed　him　here　because　he　was

supposed　not　to　be　well　and　the　country　air　so　good　for　him。

So　he　had　everything　to　say。　　Yes〃she　let　me　have　it〃even

about　THEM。〃



〃Themthat　creature？〃　　I　had　to　smother　a　kind　of　howl。

〃And　you　could　bear　it！〃



〃No。　I　couldn'tand　I　can't　now！〃　　And　the　poor　woman　burst　into　tears。



A　rigid　control；　from　the　next　day；　was；　as　I　have　said；　to　follow　them；

yet　how　often　and　how　passionately；　for　a　week；　we　came　back　together

to　the　subject！　　Much　as　we　had　discussed　it　that　Sunday　night；　I　was；

in　the　immediate　later　hours　in　especialfor　it　may　be　imagined　whether

I　sleptstill　haunted　with　the　shadow　of　something　she　had　not　told　me。

I　myself　had　kept　back　nothing；　but　there　was　a　word　Mrs。　Grose　had

kept　back。　　I　was　sure；　moreover；　by　morning；　that　this　was　not　from

a　failure　of　frankness；　but　because　on　every　side　there　were　fears。

It　seems　to　me　indeed；　in　retrospect；　that　by　the　time　the　morrow's　sun

was　high　I　had　restlessly　read　into　the　fact　before　us　almost　all　the

meaning　they　were　to　receive　from　subsequent　and　more　cruel　occurrences。

What　they　gave　me　above　all　was　just　the　sinister　figure　of　the　living　man

the　dead　one　would　keep　awhile！and　of　the　months　he　had　continuously

passed　at　Bl