creatures that once were men-第48章
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God and of Christ; I beg you not to speak to me! Don't
disturb me! Don't drain my heart's blood! I'll throw myself
in the river; and yours will be the sin; and a great sin it will
be! I should lose my soul; don't force me to it! For God's
sake; I entreat you!〃
242 ON A RAFT
The silence of the night was troubled with shrill; unnatural
sobbing; and Mitia fell on the deck of the raft; as if a blast
from the overhanging clouds had struck him down。
〃Come; come!〃 growled Sergei; anxiously watching his mate
writhing on the deck; as if scorched with fire。 〃What a
strange man! He ought to have told me if it was notif it
was not quite〃
〃You've been torturing me all the way。 Why? Am I your enemy?〃
Mitia sobbed again。
〃You're a strange lad! a rum un!〃 murmured Sergei; confused and
offended。 〃How could I know? I couldn't tell you'd take on
like that!〃
〃Understand; then; that I want to forget! To forget for ever!
My shame; my terrible torture。 You're a cruel lot! I shall go
away; and stay away for ever! I can't stand it any more!〃
〃Yes; be off with you!〃 cried Sergei across the raft;
accentuating his exclamation with a loud and cynical curse。
Then he seemed to shrink together; as if himself afraid of the
terrible drama which was unfolding itself before him; drama;
which he was now compelled to understand。 。 。 。
〃Hullo! There! I'm calling you! Are you deaf?〃 sounded up
the river the voice of Silan。 〃What are you about there? What
are you bawling about? Ahoy! Ahoy!〃
243 ON A RAFT
It seemed as if Silan enjoyed shouting; and breaking the heavy
silence of the river with his deep voice; full of strength and
health。 The cries succeeded each other; thrilling the warm;
moist air; and seeming to crush down on Mitia's feeble form。
He rose; and once more pressed his body against the steering
pole。 Sergei shouted in reply to the master with all his
strength; and cursed him at the same time under his breath。
The two voices broke through and filled the silence of the
night。 Then they seemed to meet in one deep note like the
sound of a great horn。 Once more rising to shrillness; they
floated in the air; gradually sank awayand were lost。
Silence reigned once more。
Through the cleft clouds; on the dark water the yellow splashes
of moonlight fell; and after glittering a moment disappeared;
swept away in the moist gloom。
The raft continued on its way down stream amid silence and
darkness。
CHAPTER II
Near one of the forward poles stood Silan Petroff in a red
shirt; open at the neck; showing his powerful throat and hairy
chest; hard as an anvil。 A thatch of gray hair fell over his
forehead; under which laughed great black; warm eyes。 His
sleeves; turned up to the elbow; showed the veins standing out
on his arms as they held the pole。 Silan was leaning slightly
forward; and looking watchfully ahead。 Marka stood a few paces
from him; glancing with a satisfied smile at the strong form of
her lover。 They were both silent and busy with their several
thoughts。 He was peering into the distance; and she followed
the movements of his virile; bearded face。
244 ON A RAFT
〃That must be a fisherman's fire;〃 said he; turning toward her。
〃It's all right; we're keeping on our course; Ouch!〃 And he
puffed out a full; hot breath; and gave a powerful shove with
his pole。
〃Don't tire yourself Mashourka;〃 he continued; watching her;
as with her pole she made a skilful movement。
She was round and plump; with black; bright eyes and ruddy
cheeks; barefooted; dressed only in a damp petticoat; which
clung to her body; and showed the outline of her figure。 She
turned her face to Silan and; smiling pleasantly; said: 〃You
take too much care of me; I'm all right!〃
〃I kiss you; but I don't take care of you;〃 answered Silan;
moving his shoulders。
〃That's not good enough!〃 she replied; provokingly; and they
both were silent; looking at each other with desiring eyes。
Under the rafts; the water gurgled musically。 On the right
bank; very far off; a cock crew。 Swaying lightly under their
feet; the raft floated on toward a point where the darkness
dissolved into lighter tones; and the clouds took on themselves
clearer shapes and less sombre hues。
〃Silan Petrovitch; do you know what they were shouting about
there? I know。 I bet you I know。 It was Mitia who was
complaining about us to Sergei; and it was he who cried out
with trouble; and Sergei was cursing us!〃
245 ON A RAFT
Marka questioned anxiously Silan's face; which; after her words;
became grim and coldly stubborn。
〃Well!〃 shortly。
〃Well; that's all!〃
〃If that's all; there was nothing to say。〃
〃Don't get angry。〃
〃Angry with you? I should like to be angry with you; but I
can't。〃
〃You love Marsha?〃 she whispered; coaxingly leaning toward him。
〃You bet!〃 answered Silan; with emphasis; stretching out toward
her his powerful arms。 〃Come now; don't tease me!〃
She twisted her body with the movements of a cat; and once more
leaned toward him。
〃We shall upset the steering again;〃 whispered he; kissing her
face which burned under his lips。
〃Shut up now! They can see us at the other end;〃 and motioning
aft with her head; she struggled to free herself; but he held
her more tightly still with one arm; and managed the pole with
the other hand。
〃They can see us? Let them see us。 I spit on them all! I'm
sinning; that's true; I know it; and shall have to answer for
it to God; but still you never were his wife; you were free;
you belonged to yourself。 He's suffering; I know。 And what
about me? Is my position a pleasant one? It is true that you
were not his wife; but all the same; with my position; how must
I feel now? Is it not a dreadful sin before God? It is a sin!
I know it all; and I've gone through everything! Because it's
a thing worth doing!
246 ON A RAFT
We love only once; and we may die any day。 Oh! Marka! If I'd
only waited a month before marrying you to Mitia; nothing of
this would have happened。 Directly after the death of Anfisa
I would have sent my friends to propose for you; and all would
have been right! Right before the law; without sin; without
shame。 That was my mistake; and this mistake will take away
from me five or ten years of my life。 Such a mistake as that
makes an old man of one before one's time。〃
Silan Petroff spoke with decision; but quietly; while; an
expression of inflexible determination flashed from his face;
giving him the appearance of a man who was ready then and there
to fight and struggle for the right to love。
〃Well; it's all right now; don't trouble yourself any more。 We
have talked about it more than once already;〃 whispered Marka;
freeing herself gently from his arms; and returning to her oar。
He began working his pole backward and forward; rapidly and
energetically; as if he wished to get rid of the load that
weighed on his breast; and cast a shadow over his fine face。
Day broke gradually。
The clouds; losing their density; crept slowly away on every
side; as if reluctantly giving place to the sunlight。 The
surface of the river grew lighter; and took on it the cold
gleam of polished steel。
247 ON A RAFT
〃Not long ago he talked with me about it。 'Father;' he said;
'is it not a deadly shame for you; and for me? Give her up!'
He meant you;〃 explained Silan; and smiled。 〃'Give her up;'
he said; 'return to the right path!' 'My dear son;' I said;
'go away if you want to save your skin! I shall tear you to
pieces like a rotten rag! There will be nothing left of your
great virtue! It's