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第61章

poor miss finch-第61章

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moment; an accident may happen which will force you to speak out。〃

We came in sight of the rectory as I gave him that final warning。 Nugent
was strolling up and down the road on the look…out for us。 I left Oscar
to tell his story over again to his brother; and went into the house。

Lucilla was at her piano when I entered the sitting…room。 She was not
only playingbut (a rare thing with her) singing too。 The song was;
poetry and music both; of her own composing。 〃I shall see him! I shall
see him!〃 In those four words the composition began and ended。 She
adapted them to all the happy melodies in her memory。 She accompanied
them with hands that seemed to be mad for joyhands that threatened
every moment to snap the chords of the instrument。 Never; since my first
day at the rectory; had I heard such a noise in our quiet sitting…room as
I heard now。 She was in a fever of exhilaration which; in my foreboding
frame of mind at that moment; it pained and shocked me to see。 I lifted
her off the music…stool; and shut up the piano by main force。

〃Compose yourself for heaven's sake;〃 I said。 〃Do you want to be
completely exhausted when the German comes tomorrow?〃

That consideration instantly checked her。 She suddenly became quiet; with
the abrupt facility of a child。

〃I forgot that;〃 she said; sitting down in a corner; with a face of
dismay。 〃He might refuse to perform the operation! Oh; my dear; quiet me
down somehow。 Get a book; and read to me。〃

I got the book。 Ah; the poor author! Neither she nor I paid the slightest
attention to him。 Worse still; we abused him for not interesting usand
then shut him up with a bang; and pushed him rudely into his place on the
book…shelf; and left him upside down and went to bed。

She was standing at her window when I went in to wish her good night。 The
mellow moonlight fell tenderly on her lovely face。

〃Moon that I have never seen;〃 she murmured softly; 〃I feel you looking
at me! Is the time coming when I shall look at You?〃 She turned from the
window; and eagerly put my fingers on her pulse。 〃Am I quite composed
again?〃 she asked。 〃Will he find me well to…morrow? Feel it! feel it! Is
it quiet now?〃

I felt itthrobbing faster and faster。

〃Sleep will quiet it;〃 I saidand kissed her; and left her。



She slept well。 As for me; I passed such a wretched night; and got up so
completely worn out; that I had to go back to my room after breakfast;
and lie down again。 Lucilla persuaded me to do it。 〃Herr Grosse won't be
here till the afternoon;〃 she said。 〃Rest till he comes。〃

We had reckoned without allowing for the eccentric character of our
German surgeon。 Excepting the business of his profession; Herr Grosse did
everything by impulse; and nothing by rule。 I had not long fallen into a
broken unrefreshing sleep; when I felt Zillah's hand on my shoulder; and
heard Zillah's voice in my ear。

〃Please to get up; ma'am! He's herehe has come from London by the
morning train。〃

I hurried into the sitting…room。

There; at the table; sat Herr Grosse with an open instrument…case before
him; his wild black eyes gloating over a hideous array of scissors;
probes; and knives; and his shabby hat hard by with lint and bandages
huddled together anyhow inside it。 And there stood Lucilla by his side;
stooping over himwith one hand laid familiarly on his shoulder; and
with the other deftly fingering one of his horrid instruments to find out
what it was like!


THE END OF THE FIRST PART



PART THE SECOND


CHAPTER THE THIRTY…FOURTH

Nugent shows his Hand

I CLOSED the First Part of my narrative on the day of the operation; the
twenty…fifth of June。

I open the Second Part; between six and seven weeks later; on the ninth
of August。

How did the time pass at Dimchurch in that interval?

Searching backwards in my memory; I call to life again the domestic
history of the six weeks。 It looks; on retrospection; miserably dull and
empty of incident。 I wonder when I contemplate it now; how we got through
that weary intervalhow we bore that forced inaction; that unrelieved
oppression of suspense。



Changing from bed…room to sitting…room; from sitting…room back to
bed…room; with the daylight always shut out; with the bandages always on;
except when the surgeon looked at her eyes; Lucilla bore the
imprisonmentand worse than the imprisonment; the uncertaintyof her
period of probation; with the courage that can endure anything; the
courage sustained by Hope。 With books; with music; with talkabove all;
with Love to help hershe counted her way calmly through the dull
succession of hours and days till the time came which was to decide the
question in dispute between the oculiststhe terrible question of which
of the two; Mr。 Sebright or Herr Grosse; was right。

I was not present at the examination which finally decided all doubt。 I
joined Oscar in the gardenquite as incapable as he was of exerting the
slightest self…control。 We paced silently backwards and forwards on the
lawn; like two animals in a cage。 Zillah was the only witness present
when the German examined our poor darling's eyes; Nugent engaging to wait
in the next room and announce the result from the window。 As the event
turned out; Herr Grosse was beforehand with him。 Once more we heard his
broken English shouting; 〃Hi…hi…hoi! hoi…hi! hoi…hi!〃 Once more; we
beheld his huge silk handkerchief waving at the window。 I turned sick and
faint under the excitement of the momentunder the rapture (it was
nothing less) of hearing those three electrifying words: 〃She will see!〃
Mercy! how we did abuse Mr。 Sebright; when we were all reunited again in
Lucilla's room!

The first excitement over; we had our difficulties to contend with next。

From the moment when she was positively informed that the operation had
succeeded; our once…patient Lucilla developed into a new being。 She now
rose in perpetual revolt against the caution which still deferred the day
on which she was to be allowed to make the first trial of her sight。 It
required all my influence; backed by Oscar's entreaties; and strengthened
by the furious foreign English of our excellent German surgeon (Herr
Grosse had a temper of his own; I can tell you!) to prevent her from
breaking through the medical discipline which held her in its grasp。 When
she became quite unmanageable; and vehemently abused him to his face; our
good Grosse used to swear at her; in a compound bad language of his own;
with a tremendous aspiration at the beginning of it; which always set
matters right by making her laugh。 I see him again as I write; leaving
the room on these occasions; with his eyes blazing through his
spectacles; and his shabby hat cocked sideways on his head。 〃Soh; you
little…spitfire…Feench! If you touch that bandages when I have put him
onHo…Damn…Damn! I say no more。 Good…bye!〃

From Lucilla I turn to the twin…brothers next。

Tranquilized as to the future; after his interview with Mr。 Sebright;
Oscar presented himself at his best during the time of which I am now
writing。 Lucilla's main reliance in her days in the darkened room; was on
what her lover could do to relieve and to encourage her。 He never once
failed her; his patience was perfect; his devotion was inexhaustible。 It
is sad to say so; in view of what happened afterwards; but I only tell a
necessary truth when I declare that he immensely strengthened his hold on
her affections; in those last days of her blindness when his society was
most precious to her。 Ah; how fervently she used to talk of him when she
and I were left together at night! Forgive me if I leave this part of the
history of the courtship untold。 I don't like to write of itI don't
like to think of it。 Let us get on to something else。

Nugent comes next。 I would give a great deal; poor as I am; to be able to
leave him out。 It is not to be done。 I must write about that lost wretch;
and you must read about him; whether we like it or not。

The days of Lucilla's imprisonment; were also the days when my favorite
disappointed me; for the first time。 He and his brother seemed to change
places。 It was Nugent now who appeared to disadvantage by comparison with
Oscar。 He su

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