the queen of hearts-第9章

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CHAPTER　IV。

OUR　GRAND　PROJECT。

AT　the　end　of　the　fifth　week　of　our　guest's　stay；　among　the
letters　which　the　morning's　post　brought　to　The　Glen　Tower　there
was　one　for　me；　from　my　son　George；　in　the　Crimea。

The　effect　which　this　letter　produced　in　our　little　circle
renders　it　necessary　that　I　should　present　it　here；　to　speak　for
itself。

This　is　what　I　read　alone　in　my　own　room：


〃MY　DEAREST　FATHERAfter　the　great　public　news　of　the　fall　of
Sebastopol；　have　you　any　ears　left　for　small　items　of　private
intelligence　from　insignificant　subaltern　officers？　Prepare；　if
you　have；　for　a　sudden　and　a　startling　announcement。　How　shall　I
write　the　words？　How　shall　I　tell　you　that　I　am　really　coming
home？

〃I　have　a　private　opportunity　of　sending　this　letter；　and　only　a
short　time　to　write　it　in；　so　I　must　put　many　things；　if　I　can；
into　few　words。　The　doctor　has　reported　me　fit　to　travel　at　last；
and　I　leave；　thanks　to　the　privilege　of　a　wounded　man；　by　the
next　ship。　The　name　of　the　vessel　and　the　time　of　starting　are　on
the　list　which　I　inclose。　I　have　made　all　my　calculations；　and；
allowing　for　every　possible　delay；　I　find　that　I　shall　be　with
you；　at　the　latest；　on　the　first　of　Novemberperhaps　some　days
earlier。

〃I　am　far　too　full　of　my　return；　and　of　something　else　connected
with　it　which　is　equally　dear　to　me；　to　say　anything　about　public
affairs；　more　especially　as　I　know　that　the　newspapers　must；　by
this　time；　have　given　you　plenty　of　information。　Let　me　fill　the
rest　of　this　paper　with　a　subject　which　is　very　near　to　my
heartnearer；　I　am　almost　ashamed　to　say；　than　the　great　triumph
of　my　countrymen；　in　which　my　disabled　condition　has　prevented　me
from　taking　any　share。

〃I　gathered　from　your　last　letter　that　Miss　Yelverton　was　to　pay
you　a　visit　this　autumn；　in　your　capacity　of　her　guardian。　If　she
is　already　with　you；　pray　move　heaven　and　earth　to　keep　her　at
The　Glen　Tower　till　I　come　back。　Do　you　anticipate　my　confession
from　this　entreaty？　My　dear；　dear　father；　all　my　hopes　rest　on
that　one　darling　treasure　which　you　are　guarding　perhaps；　at　this
moment；　under　your　own　roofall　my　happiness　depends　on　making
Jessie　Yelverton　my　wife。

〃If　I　did　not　sincerely　believe　that　you　will　heartily　approve　of
my　choice；　I　should　hardly　have　ventured　on　this　abrupt
confession。　Now　that　I　have　made　it；　let　me　go　on　and　tell　you
why　I　have　kept　my　attachment　up　to　this　time　a　secret　from　every
oneeven　from　Jessie　herself。　（You　see　I　call　her　by　her
Christian　name　already！）

〃I　should　have　risked　everything；　father；　and　have　laid　my　whole
heart　open　before　her　more　than　a　year　ago；　but　for　the　order
which　sent　our　regiment　out　to　take　its　share　in　this　great
struggle　of　the　Russian　war。　No　ordinary　change　in　my　life　would
have　silenced　me　on　the　subject　of　all　others　of　which　I　was　most
anxious　to　speak；　but　this　change　made　me　think　seriously　of　the
future；　and　out　of　those　thoughts　came　the　resolution　which　I
have　kept　until　this　time。　For　her　sake；　and　for　her　sake　only；　I
constrained　myself　to　leave　the　words　unspoken　which　might　have
made　her　my　promised　wife。　I　resolved　to　spare　her　the　dreadful
suspense　of　waiting　for　her　betrothed　husband　till　the　perils　of
war　might；　or　might　not；　give　him　back　to　her。　I　resolved　to　save
her　from　the　bitter　grief　of　my　death　if　a　bullet　laid　me　low。　I
resolved　to　preserve　her　from　the　wretched　sacrifice　of　herself
if　I　came　back；　as　many　a　brave　man　will　come　back　from　this　war；
invalided　for　life。　Leaving　her　untrammeled　by　any　engagement；
unsuspicious　perhaps　of　my　real　feelings　toward　her；　I　might　die；
and　know　that；　by　keeping　silence；　I　had　spared　a　pang　to　the
heart　that　was　dearest　to　me。　This　was　the　thought　that　stayed
the　words　on　my　lips　when　I　left　England；　uncertain　whether　I
should　ever　come　back。　If　I　had　loved　her　less　dearly；　if　her
happiness　had　been　less　precious　to　me；　I　might　have　given　way
under　the　hard　restraint　I　imposed　on　myself；　and　might　have
spoken　selfishly　at　the　last　moment。

〃And　now　the　time　of　trial　is　past；　the　war　is　over；　and；
although　I　still　walk　a　little　lame；　I　am；　thank　God；　in　as　good
health　and　in　much　better　spirits　than　when　I　left　home。　Oh；
father；　if　I　should　lose　her　nowif　I　should　get　no　reward　for
sparing　her　but　the　bitterest　of　all　disappointments！　Sometimes　I
am　vain　enough　to　think　that　I　made　some　little　impression　on
her；　sometimes　I　doubt　if　she　has　a　suspicion　of　my　love。　She
lives　in　a　gay　worldshe　is　the　center　of　perpetual
admirationmen　with　all　the　qualities　to　win　a　woman's　heart　are
perpetually　about　hercan　I；　dare　I　hope？　Yes；　I　must！　Only　keep
her；　I　entreat　you；　at　The　Glen　Tower。　In　that　quiet　world；　in
that　freedom　from　frivolities　and　temptations；　she　will　listen　to
me　as　she　might　listen　nowhere　else。　Keep　her；　my　dearest；
kindest　fatherand；　above　all　things；　breathe　not　a　word　to　her
of　this　letter。　I　have　surely　earned　the　privilege　of　being　the
first　to　open　her　eyes　to　the　truth。　She　must　know　nothing；　now
that　I　am　coming　home；　till　she　knows　all　from　my　own　lips。〃


Here　the　writing　hurriedly　broke　off。　I　am　only　giving　myself
credit　for　common　feeling；　I　trust；　when　I　confess　that　what　I
read　deeply　affected　me。　I　think　I　never　felt　so　fond　of　my　boy；
and　so　proud　of　him；　as　at　the　moment　when　I　laid　down　his
letter。

As　soon　as　I　could　control　my　spirits；　I　began　to　calculate　the
question　of　time　with　a　trembling　eagerness；　which　brought　back
to　my　mind　my　own　young　days　of　love　and　hope。　My　son　was　to　come
back；　at　the　latest；　on　the　first　of　November；　and　Jessie's
allotted　six　weeks　would　expire　on　the　twenty…second　of　October。
Ten　days　too　soon！　But　for　the　caprice　which　had　brought　her　to
us　exactly　that　number　of　days　before　her　time　she　would　have
been　in　the　house；　as　a　matter　of　necessity；　on　George's　return。

I　searched　back　in　my　memory　for　a　conversation　that　I　had　held
with　her　a　week　since　on　her　future　plans。　Toward　the　middle　of
November；　her　aunt；　Lady　Westwick；　had　arranged　to　go　to　her
house　in　Paris；　and　Jessie　was；　of　course；　to　accompany　herto
accompany　her　into　that　very　circle　of　the　best　English　and　the
best　French　society　which　contained　in　it　the　elements　most
adverse　to　George's　hopes。　Between　this　time　and　that　she　had　no
special　engagement；　and　she　had　only　settled　to　write　and　warn
her　aunt　of　her　return　to　London　a　day　or　two　before　she　left　The
Glen　Tower。

Under　these　circumstances；　the　first；　the　all…important　necessity
was　to　prevail　on　her　to　prolong　her　stay　beyond　the　allotted　six
weeks　by　ten　days。　After　the　caution　to　be　silent　impressed　on　me
（and　most　naturally；　poor　boy）　in　George's　letter；　I　felt　that　I
could　only　appeal　to　her　on　the　ordinary　ground　of　hospitality。
Would　this　be　sufficient　to　effect　the　object？

I　was　sure　that　the　hours　of　the　morning　and　the　afternoon　had；
thus　far；　been　fully　and　happily　occupied　by　her　various
amusements　indoors　and　out。　She　was　no　more　weary　of　her　days　now
than　she　had　been　when　she　first　came　among　us。　But　I　was　by　no
means　so　certain　that　she　was　not　tired　of　her　evenings。　I　had
latterly　noticed　symptoms　of　weariness　after　the　lamps　were　lit；
and　a　suspicious　regularity　in　retiring　to　bed　the　moment　the
clock　struck　ten。　If　I　could　provide　her　with　a　new　amusement　for
the　long　evenings；　I　might　leave　the　days　to　take　care　of
themselves；　and　might　then　make　sure　（seeing　that　she　had　no
special　engagement　in　London　until　the　middle　of　November）　of　her
being　sincerely　thankful　and　ready　to　prolong　her　stay。

How　was　this　to　be　done？　The　piano　and　the　novels　had　both　failed
to　attract　her。　What　other　amusement　was　there　to　offer？

It　was　useless；　at　present；　to　ask　myself　such　questions　as
these。　I　was　too　much　agitated　to　think　collectedly　on　the　most
trifling　subjects。　I　was　even　too　restless　to　stay　in　my　own
room。　My　son's　letter　had　given　me　so　fresh　an　interest　in　Jessie
that　I　was　now　as　impatient　to　see　her　as　if　we　were　about　to
meet　for　the　first　time。　I　wanted　to　look　at　her　with　my　new
eyes；　to　listen　to　her　with　my　new　ears；　to　study　her　secretly
with　my　new　purposes；