the queen of hearts-第86章

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without　stopping　to　analyze　my　own　sensationsalmost　without
knowing　what　I　was　about。　In　three　minutes　from　the　time　when　the
stranger　had　closed　my　door　the　clerk　had　started　for　the　bank；
and　I　was　alone　again　in　my　room；　with　my　hands　as　cold　as　ice
and　my　head　all　in　a　whirl。

I　did　not　recover　my　control　over　myself　until　the　clerk　came
back　with　the　notes　in　his　hand。　He　had　just　got　to　the　bank　in
the　nick　of　time。　As　the　cash　for　my　draft　was　handed　to　him　over
the　counter；　the　clock　struck　five；　and　he　heard　the　order　given
to　close　the　doors。

When　I　had　counted　the　bank…notes　and　had　locked　them　up　in　the
safe；　my　better　sense　seemed　to　come　back　to　me　on　a　sudden。
Never　have　I　reproached　myself　before　or　since　as　I　reproached
myself　at　that　moment。　What　sort　of　return　had　I　made　for　Mr。
Fauntleroy's　fatherly　kindness　to　me？　I　had　insulted　him　by　the
meanest；　the　grossest　distrust　of　the　honor　and　the　credit　of　his
house；　and　that　on　the　word　of　an　absolute　stranger；　of　a
vagabond；　if　ever　there　was　one　yet。　It　was　madnessdownright
madness　in　any　man　to　have　acted　as　I　had　done。　I　could　not
account　for　my　own　inconceivably　thoughtless　proceeding。　I　could
hardly　believe　in　it　myself。　I　opened　the　safe　and　looked　at　the
bank…notes　again。　I　locked　it　once　more；　and　flung　the　key　down
on　the　table　in　a　fury　of　vexation　against　myself。　There　the
money　was；　upbraiding　me　with　my　own　inconceivable　folly；　telling
me　in　the　plainest　terms　that　I　had　risked　depriving　myself　of　my
best　and　kindest　friend　henceforth　and　forever。

It　was　necessary　to　do　something　at　once　toward　making　all　the
atonement　that　lay　in　my　power。　I　felt　that；　as　soon　as　I　began
to　cool　down　a　little。　There　was　but　one　plain；　straight…forward
way　left　now　out　of　the　scrape　in　which　I　had　been　mad　enough　to
involve　myself。　I　took　my　hat；　and；　without　stopping　an　instant
to　hesitate；　hurried　off　to　the　bank　to　make　a　clean　breast　of　it
to　Mr。　Fauntleroy。

When　I　knocked　at　the　private　door　and　asked　for　him；　I　was　told
that　he　had　not　been　at　the　bank　for　the　last　two　days。　One　of
the　other　partners　was　there；　however；　and　was　working　at　that
moment　in　his　own　room。

I　sent　in　my　name　at　once；　and　asked　to　see　him。　He　and　I　were
little　better　than　strangers　to　each　other；　and　the　interview　was
likely　to　be；　on　that　account；　unspeakably　embarrassing　and
humiliating　on　my　side。　Still；　I　could　not　go　home。　I　could　not
endure　the　inaction　of　the　next　day；　the　Sunday；　without　having
done　my　best　on　the　spot　to　repair　the　error　into　which　my　own
folly　had　led　me。　Uncomfortable　as　I　felt　at　the　prospect　of　the
approaching　interview；　I　should　have　been　far　more　uneasy　in　my
mind　if　the　partner　had　declined　to　see　me。

To　my　relief；　the　bank　porter　returned　with　a　message　requesting
me　to　walk　in。

What　particular　form　my　explanations　and　apologies　took　when　I
tried　to　offer　them　is　more　than　I　can　tell　now。　I　was　so
confused　and　distressed　that　I　hardly　knew　what　I　was　talking
about　at　the　time。　The　one　circumstance　which　I　remember　clearly
is　that　I　was　ashamed　to　refer　to　my　interview　with　the　strange
man；　and　that　I　tried　to　account　for　my　sudden　withdrawal　of　my
balance　by　referring　it　to　some　inexplicable　panic；　caused　by
mischievous　reports　which　I　was　unable　to　trace　to　their　source；
and　which；　for　anything　I　knew　to　the　contrary；　might；　after　all；
have　been　only　started　in　jest。　Greatly　to　my　surprise；　the
partner　did　not　seem　to　notice　the　lamentable　lameness　of　my
excuses；　and　did　not　additionally　confuse　me　by　asking　any
questions。　A　weary；　absent　look；　which　I　had　observed　on　his　face
when　I　came　in；　remained　on　it　while　I　was　speaking。　It　seemed　to
be　an　effort　to　him　even　to　keep　up　the　appearance　of　listening
to　me；　and　when；　at　last；　I　fairly　broke　down　in　the　middle　of　a
sentence；　and　gave　up　the　hope　of　getting　any　further；　all　the
answer　he　gave　me　was　comprised　in　these　few　civil　commonplace
words：

〃Never　mind；　Mr。　Trowbridge；　pray　don't　think　of　apologizing。　We
are　all　liable　to　make　mista　kes。　Say　nothing　more　about　it；　and
bring　the　money　back　on　Monday　if　you　still　honor　us　with　your
confidence。〃

He　looked　down　at　his　papers　as　if　he　was　anxious　to　be　alone
again；　and　I　had　no　alternative；　of　course；　but　to　take　my　leave
immediately。　I　went　home；　feeling　a　little　easier　in　my　mind　now
that　I　had　paved　the　way　for　making　the　best　practical　atonement
in　my　power　by　bringing　my　balance　back　the　first　thing　on　Monday
morning。　Still；　I　passed　a　weary　day　on　Sunday；　reflecting；　sadly
enough；　that　I　had　not　yet　made　my　peace　with　Mr。　Fauntleroy。　My
anxiety　to　set　myself　right　with　my　generous　friend　was　so
intense　that　I　risked　intruding　myself　on　his　privacy　by　calling
at　his　town　residence　on　the　Sunday。　He　was　not　there；　and　his
servant　could　tell　me　nothing　of　his　whereabouts。　There　was　no
help　for　it　now　but　to　wait　till　his　weekday　duties　brought　him
back　to　the　bank。

I　went　to　business　on　Monday　morning　half　an　hour　earlier　than
usual；　so　great　was　my　impatience　to　restore　the　amount　of　that
unlucky　draft　to　my　account　as　soon　as　possible　after　the　bank
opened。

On　entering　my　office；　I　stopped　with　a　startled　feeling　just
inside　the　door。　Something　serious　had　happened。　The　clerks；
instead　of　being　at　their　desks　as　usual；　were　all　huddled
together　in　a　group；　talking　to　each　other　with　blank　faces。　When
they　saw　me；　they　fell　back　behind　my　managing　man；　who　stepped
forward　with　a　circular　in　his　hand。

〃Have　you　heard　the　news；　sir？〃　he　said。

〃No。　What　is　it？〃

He　handed　me　the　circular。　My　heart　gave　one　violent　throb　the
instant　I　looked　at　it。　I　felt　myself　turn　pale；　I　felt　my　knees
trembling　under　me。

Marsh；　Stracey；　Fauntleroy　&　Graham　had　stopped　payment。

〃The　circular　has　not　been　issued　more　than　half　an　hour；〃
continued　my　managing　clerk。　〃I　have　just　come　from　the　bank；
sir。　The　doors　are　shut；　there　is　no　doubt　about　it。　Marsh　&
Company　have　stopped　this　morning。〃

I　hardly　heard　him；　I　hardly　knew　who　was　talking　to　me。　My
strange　visitor　of　the　Saturday　had　taken　instant　possession　of
all　my　thoughts；　and　his　words　of　warning　seemed　to　be　sounding
once　more　in　my　ears。　This　man　had　known　the　true　condition　of
the　bank　when　not　another　soul　outside　the　doors　was　aware　of　it！
The　last　draft　paid　across　the　counter　of　that　ruined　house；　when
the　doors　closed　on　Saturday；　was　the　draft　that　I　had　so
bitterly　reproached　myself　for　drawing；　the　one　balance　saved
from　the　wreck　was　my　balance。　Where　had　the　stranger　got　the
information　that　had　saved　me？　and　why　had　he　brought　it　to　my
ears？

I　was　still　groping；　like　a　man　in　the　dark；　for　an　answer　to
those　two　questionsI　was　still　bewildered　by　the　unfathomable
mystery　of　doubt　into　which　they　had　plunged　mewhen　the
discovery　of　the　stopping　of　the　bank　was　followed　almost
immediately　by　a　second　shock；　far　more　dreadful；　far　heavier　to
bear；　so　far　as　I　was　concerned；　than　the　first。

While　I　and　my　clerks　were　still　discussing　the　failure　of　the
firm；　two　mercantile　men；　who　were　friends　of　mine；　ran　into　the
office；　and　overwhelmed　us　with　the　news　that　one　of　the　partners
had　been　arrested　for　forgery。　Never　shall　I　forget　the　terrible
Monday　morning　when　those　tidings　reached　me；　and　when　I　knew
that　the　partner　was　Mr。　Fauntleroy。

I　was　true　to　himI　can　honestly　say　I　was　true　to　my　belief　in
my　generous　friendwhen　that　fearful　news　reached　me。　My
fellow…merchants　had　got　all　the　particulars　of　the　arrest。　They
told　me　that　two　of　Mr。　Fauntleroy's　fellow…trustees　had　come　up
to　London　to　make　arrangements　about　selling　out　some　stock。　On
inquiring　for　Mr。　Fauntleroy　at　the　banking…house；　they　had　been
informed　that　he　was　not　there；　and；　after　leaving　a　message　for
him；　they　had　gone　into　the　City　to　make　an　appointment　with
their　stockbroker　for　a　future　day；　when　their　fellow…trustee
might　be　able　to　attend。　The　stock…broker　volunteered　to　make
certain　business　inquiries　on　the　spot；　with　a　view　to　saving　as
much　time　as　possible；　and　left　them　at　his　office　to　await　his
return。　He　came　back；　looking　very　much　am