the queen of hearts-第66章

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She　came　on　to　within　a　few　paces　of　him　without　a　word　or　a
tear；　or　a　shadow　of　change　passing　over　the　dreadful　rigidity　of
her　face。　She　looked　at　him　with　a　strange　look；　she　pointed　to
the　newspaper　crumpled　in　his　hand　with　a　strange　gesture；　she
spoke　to　him　in　a　strange　voice。

〃You　know　it！〃　she　said。

His　eyes　met　hersshe　shrank　from　themturnedand　laid　her
arms　and　her　head　heavily　against　the　wall。

〃Oh；　Alfred；〃　she　said；　〃I　was　so　lonely　in　the　world；　and　I　was
so　fond　of　you！〃

The　woman's　delicacy；　the　woman's　trembling　tenderness　welled　up
from　her　heart；　and　touched　her　voice　with　a　tone　of　its　old
sweetness　as　she　murmured　those　simple　words。

She　said　no　more。　Her　confession　of　her　fault；　her　appeal　to
their　past　love　for　pardon；　were　both　poured　forth　in　that　one
sentence。　She　left　it　to　his　own　heart　to　tell　him　the　rest。　How
anxiously　her　vigilant　love　had　followed　his　every　word　and
treasured　up　his　every　opinion　in　the　days　when　they　first　met；
how　weakly　and　falsely；　and　yet　with　how　true　an　affection　for
him；　she　had　shrunk　from　the　disclosure　　which　she　knew　but　too
well　would　have　separ　ated　them　even　at　the　church　door；　how
desperately　she　had　fought　against　the　coming　discovery　which
threatened　to　tear　her　from　the　bosom　she　clung　to；　and　to　cast
her　out　into　the　world　with　the　shadow　of　her　own　shame　to　darken
her　life　to　the　endall　this　she　left　him　to　feel；　for　the
moment　which　might　part　them　forever　was　the　moment　when　she　knew
best　how　truly；　how　passionately　he　had　loved　her。

His　lips　trembled　as　he　stood　looking　at　her　in　silence；　and　the
slow；　burning　tears　dropped　heavily；　one　by　one；　down　his　cheeks。
The　natural　human　remembrance　of　the　golden　days　of　their
companionship；　of　the　nights　and　nights　when　that　dear
headturned　away　from　him　now　in　unutterable　misery　and
shamehad　nestled　itself　so　fondly　and　so　happily　on　his　breast；
fought　hard　to　silence　his　conscience；　to　root　out　his　dreadful
sense　of　guilt；　to　tear　the　words　of　Judgment　from　their　ruthless
hold　on　his　mind；　to　claim　him　in　the　sweet　names　of　Pity　and　of
Love。　If　she　had　turned　and　looked　at　him　at　that　moment；　their
next　words　would　have　been　spoken　in　each　other's　arms。　But　the
oppression　of　her　despair　under　his　silence　was　too　heavy　for
her；　and　she　never　moved。

He　forced　himself　to　look　away　from　her；　he　struggled　hard　to
break　the　silence　between　them。

〃God　forgive　you；　Emily！〃　he　said。

As　her　name　passed　his　lips；　his　voice　failed　him；　and　the
torture　at　his　heart　burst　its　way　out　in　sobs。　He　hurried　to　the
door　to　spare　her　the　terrible　reproof　of　the　grief　that　had　now
mastered　him。　When　he　passed　her　she　turned　toward　him　with　a
faint　cry。

He　caught　her　as　she　sank　forward；　and　saved　her　from　dropping　on
the　floor。　For　the　last　time　his　arms　closed　round　her。　For　the
last　time　his　lips　touched　herscold　and　insensible　to　him　now。
He　laid　her　on　the　sofa　and　went　out。

One　of　the　female　servants　was　crossing　the　hall。　The　girl
started　as　she　met　him；　and　turned　pale　at　the　sight　of　his　face。
He　could　not　speak　to　her；　but　he　pointed　to　the　study　door。　He
saw　her　go　into　the　room；　and　then　left　the　house。

He　never　entered　it　more；　and　he　and　his　wife　never　met　again。


Later　on　that　last　day；　a　sister　of　Mr。　Carling'sa　married
woman　living　in　the　towncame　to　the　rectory。　She　brought　an
open　note　with　her；　addressed　to　the　unhappy　mistress　of　the
house。　It　contained　these　few　lines；　blotted　and　stained　with
tears：

May　God　grant　us　both　the　time　for　repentance！　If　I　had　loved　you
less；　I　might　have　trusted　myself　to　see　you　again。　Forgive　me；
and　pity　me；　and　remember　me　in　your　prayers；　as　I　shall　forgive；
and　pity；　and　remember　you。


He　had　tried　to　write　more；　but　the　pen　had　dropped　from　his
hand。　His　sister's　entreaties　had　not　moved　him。　After　giving　her
the　note　to　deliver；　he　had　solemnly　charged　her　to　be　gentle　in
communicating　the　tidings　that　she　bore；　and　had　departed　alone
for　London。　He　heard　all　remonstrances　with　patience。　He　did　not
deny　that　the　deception　of　which　his　wife　had　been　guilty　was　the
most　pardonable　of　all　concealments　of　the　truth；　because　it
sprang　from　her　love　for　him；　but　he　had　the　same　hopeless　answer
for　every　one　who　tried　to　plead　with　himthe　verse　from　the
Gospel　of　Saint　Luke。

His　purpose　in　traveling　to　London　was　to　make　the　necessary
arrangements　for　his　wife's　future　existence；　and　then　to　get
employment　which　would　separate　him　from　his　home　and　from　all
its　associations。　A　missionary　expedition　to　one　of　the　Pacific
Islands　accepted　him　as　a　volunteer。　Broken　in　body　and　spirit；
his　last　look　of　England　from　the　deck　of　the　ship　was　his　last
look　at　land。　A　fortnight　afterward；　his　brethren　read　the
burial…service　over　him　on　a　calm；　cloudless　evening　at　sea。
Before　he　was　committed　to　the　deep；　his　little　pocket　Bible；
which　had　been　a　present　from　his　wife；　was；　in　accordance　with
his　dying　wishes；　placed　open　on　his　breast；　so　that　the
inscription；　〃To　my　dear　Husband；〃　might　rest　over　his　heart。

His　unhappy　wife　still　lives。　When　the　farewell　lines　of　her
husband's　writing　reached　her　she　was　incapable　of　comprehending
them。　The　mental　prostration　which　had　followed　the　parting　scene
was　soon　complicated　by　physical　sufferingby　fever　on　the
brain。　To　the　surprise　of　all　who　attended　her；　she　lived　through
the　shock；　recovering　with　the　complete　loss　of　one　faculty；
which；　in　her　situation；　poor　thing；　was　a　mercy　and　a　gain　to
herthe　faculty　of　memory。　From　that　time　to　this　she　has　never
had　the　slightest　gleam　of　recollection　of　anything　that　happened
before　her　illness。　In　her　happy　oblivion；　the　veriest　trifles
are　as　new　and　as　interesting　to　her　as　if　she　was　beginning　her
existence　again。　Under　the　tender　care　of　the　friends　who　now
protect　her；　she　lives　contentedly　the　life　of　a　child。　When　her
last　hour　comes；　may　she　die　with　nothing　on　her　memory　but　the
recollection　of　their　kindness！

THE　EIGHTH　DAY。

THE　wind　that　I　saw　in　the　sky　yesterday　has　come。　It　sweeps　down
our　little　valley　in　angry　howling　gusts；　and　drives　the　heavy
showers　before　it　in　great　sheets　of　spray。

There　are　some　people　who　find　a　strangely　exciting　effect
produced　on　their　spirits　by　the　noise；　and　rush；　and　tumult　of
the　elements　on　a　stormy　day。　It　has　never　been　so　with　me；　and
it　is　less　so　than　ever　now。　I　can　hardly　bear　to　think　of　my　son
at　sea　in　such　a　tempest　as　this。　While　I　can　still　get　no　news
of　his　ship；　morbid　fancies　beset　me　which　I　vainly　try　to　shake
off。　I　see　the　trees　through　my　window　bending　before　the　wind。
Are　the　masts　of　the　good　ship　bending　like　them　at　this　moment？
I　hear　the　wash　of　the　driving　rain。　Is　_he_　hearing　the　thunder
of　the　raging　waves？　If　he　had　only　come　back　last　night！it　is
vain　to　dwell　on　it；　but　the　thought　will　haunt　meif　he　had
only　come　back　last　night！

I　tried　to　speak　cautiously　about　him　again　to　Jessie；　as　Owen
had　advised　me；　but　I　am　so　old　and　feeble　now　that　this
ill…omened　storm　has　upset　me；　and　I　could　not　feel　sure　enough
of　my　own　self…control　to　venture　on　matching　myself　to…day
against　a　light…hearted；　lively　girl；　with　all　her　wits　about
her。　It　is　so　important　that　I　should　not　betray　Georgeit　would
be　so　inexcusable　on　my　part　if　his　interests　suffered；　even
accidentally；　in　my　hands。

This　was　a　trying　day　for　our　guest。　Her　few　trifling　indoor
resources　had；　as　I　could　see；　begun　to　lose　their　attractions
for　her　at　last。　If　we　were　not　now　getting　to　the　end　of　the
stories；　and　to　the　end；　therefore；　of　the　Ten　Days　also；　our
chance　of　keeping　her　much　longer　at　the　Glen　Tower　would　be　a
very　poor　one。

It　was；　I　think；　a　great　relief　for　us　all　to　be　summoned
together　this　evening　for　a　definite　purpose。　The　wind　had　fallen
a　little　as　it　got　on　toward　dusk。　To　hear　it　growing　gradually
fainter　and　fainter　in　the　valley　below　added　immeasurably　to　the
comforting　influence　of　the　blazing　fire　and　the　cheerful　lights
when　the　shutters　were　closed　for　the　night。

The　number　drawn　happened　to　be　the　last　of　the　seriesTenand
the　last