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第24章

st. ives-第24章

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a native。  At the same time; I was afraid my name of St。 Ives was 

scarcely suitable; till I remembered there was a town so called in 

the province of Cornwall; thought I might yet be glad to claim it 

for my place of origin; and decided for a Cornish family and a 

Scots education。  For a trade; as I was equally ignorant of all; 

and as the most innocent might at any moment be the means of my 

exposure; it was best to pretend to none。  And I dubbed myself a 

young gentleman of a sufficient fortune and an idle; curious habit 

of mind; rambling the country at my own charges; in quest of 

health; information; and merry adventures。



At Newcastle; which was the first town I reached; I completed my 

preparations for the part; before going to the inn; by the purchase 

of a knapsack and a pair of leathern gaiters。  My plaid I continued 

to wear from sentiment。  It was warm; useful to sleep in if I were 

again benighted; and I had discovered it to be not unbecoming for a 

man of gallant carriage。  Thus equipped; I supported my character 

of the light…hearted pedestrian not amiss。  Surprise was indeed 

expressed that I should have selected such a season of the year; 

but I pleaded some delays of business; and smilingly claimed to be 

an eccentric。  The devil was in it; I would say; if any season of 

the year was not good enough for me; I was not made of sugar; I was 

no mollycoddle to be afraid of an ill…aired bed or a sprinkle of 

snow; and I would knock upon the table with my fist and call for 

t'other bottle; like the noisy and free…hearted young gentleman I 

was。  It was my policy (if I may so express myself) to talk much 

and say little。  At the inn tables; the country; the state of the 

roads; the business interest of those who sat down with me; and the 

course of public events; afforded me a considerable field in which 

I might discourse at large and still communicate no information 

about myself。  There was no one with less air of reticence; I 

plunged into my company up to the neck; and I had a long cock…and…

bull story of an aunt of mine which must have convinced the most 

suspicious of my innocence。  'What!' they would have said; 'that 

young ass to be concealing anything!  Why; he has deafened me with 

an aunt of his until my head aches。  He only wants you should give 

him a line; and he would tell you his whole descent from Adam 

downward; and his whole private fortune to the last shilling。' A 

responsible solid fellow was even so much moved by pity for my 

inexperience as to give me a word or two of good advice: that I was 

but a young man after all … I had at this time a deceptive air of 

youth that made me easily pass for one…and…twenty; and was; in the 

circumstances; worth a fortune … that the company at inns was very 

mingled; that I should do well to be more careful; and the like; to 

all which I made answer that I meant no harm myself and expected 

none from others; or the devil was in it。  'You are one of those d…

d prudent fellows that I could never abide with;' said I。  'You are 

the kind of man that has a long head。  That's all the world; my 

dear sir: the long…heads and the short…horns!  Now; I am a short…

horn。'  'I doubt;' says he; 'that you will not go very far without 

getting sheared。'  I offered to bet with him on that; and he made 

off; shaking his head。



But my particular delight was to enlarge on politics and the war。  

None damned the French like me; none was more bitter against the 

Americans。  And when the north…bound mail arrived; crowned with 

holly; and the coachman and guard hoarse with shouting victory; I 

went even so far as to entertain the company to a bowl of punch; 

which I compounded myself with no illiberal hand; and doled out to 

such sentiments as the following:…



'Our glorious victory on the Nivelle'!  'Lord Wellington; God bless 

him! and may victory ever attend upon his arms!' and; 'Soult; poor 

devil! and may he catch it again to the same tune!'



Never was oratory more applauded to the echo … never any one was 

more of the popular man than I。  I promise you; we made a night of 

it。  Some of the company supported each other; with the assistance 

of boots; to their respective bedchambers; while the rest slept on 

the field of glory where we had left them; and at the breakfast 

table the next morning there was an extraordinary assemblage of red 

eyes and shaking fists。  I observed patriotism to burn much lower 

by daylight。  Let no one blame me for insensibility to the reverses 

of France!  God knows how my heart raged。  How I longed to fall on 

that herd of swine and knock their heads together in the moment of 

their revelry!  But you are to consider my own situation and its 

necessities; also a certain lightheartedness; eminently Gallic; 

which forms a leading trait in my character; and leads me to throw 

myself into new circumstances with the spirit of a schoolboy。  It 

is possible that I sometimes allowed this impish humour to carry me 

further than good taste approves: and I was certainly punished for 

it once。



This was in the episcopal city of Durham。  We sat down; a 

considerable company; to dinner; most of us fine old vatted English 

tories of that class which is often so enthusiastic as to be 

inarticulate。  I took and held the lead from the beginning; and; 

the talk having turned on the French in the Peninsula; I gave them 

authentic details (on the authority of a cousin of mine; an ensign) 

of certain cannibal orgies in Galicia; in which no less a person 

than General Caffarelli had taken a part。  I always disliked that 

commander; who once ordered me under arrest for insubordination; 

and it is possible that a spice of vengeance added to the rigour of 

my picture。  I have forgotten the details; no doubt they were high…

coloured。  No doubt I rejoiced to fool these jolter…heads; and no 

doubt the sense of security that I drank from their dull; gasping 

faces encouraged me to proceed extremely far。  And for my sins; 

there was one silent little man at table who took my story at the 

true value。  It was from no sense of humour; to which he was quite 

dead。  It was from no particular intelligence; for he had not any。  

The bond of sympathy; of all things in the world; had rendered him 

clairvoyant。



Dinner was no sooner done than I strolled forth into the streets 

with some design of viewing the cathedral; and the little man was 

silently at my heels。  A few doors from the inn; in a dark place of 

the street; I was aware of a touch on my arm; turned suddenly; and 

found him looking up at me with eyes pathetically bright。



'I beg your pardon; sir; but that story of yours was particularly 

rich。  He … he!  Particularly racy;' said he。  'I tell you; sir; I 

took you wholly!  I SMOKED you!  I believe you and I; sir; if we 

had a chance to talk; would find we had a good many opinions in 

common。  Here is the 〃Blue Bell;〃 a very comfortable place。  They 

draw good ale; sir。  Would you be so condescending as to share a 

pot with me?'



There was something so ambiguous and secret in the little man's 

perpetual signalling; that I confess my curiosity was much aroused。  

Blaming myself; even as I did so; for the indiscretion; I embraced 

his proposal; and we were soon face to face over a tankard of 

mulled ale。  He lowered his voice to the least attenuation of a 

whisper。



'Here; sir;' said he; 'is to the Great Man。  I think you take me?  

No?'  He leaned forward till our noses touched。  'Here is to the 

Emperor!' said he。



I was extremely embarrassed; and; in spite of the creature's 

innocent appearance; more than half alarmed。  I thought him too 

ingenious; and; indeed; too daring for a spy。  Yet if he were 

honest he must be a man of extraordinary indiscretion; and 

therefore very unfit to be encouraged by an escaped prisoner。  I 

took a half course; accordingly … accepted his toast in silence; 


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