mark twain, a biography, 1900-1907-第52章

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one　of　the　Appletons；　one　of　the　Putnams；　George　Bowker；　and　others　were
on　the　train。　　On　the　trip　down　in　the　dining…car　there　was　a　discussion　
concerning　the　copyrighting　of　ideas；　which　finally　resolved　itself　into
the　possibility　of　originating　a　new　one。　　Clemens　said：

〃There　is　no　such　thing　as　a　new　idea。　　It　is　impossible。　　We　simply　take
a　lot　of　old　ideas　and　put　them　into　a　sort　of　mental　kaleidoscope。　　We
give　them　a　turn　and　they　make　new　and　curious　combinations。　　We　keep　on
turning　and　making　new　combinations　indefinitely；　but　they　are　the　same
old　pieces　of　colored　glass　that　have　been　in　use　through　all　the　ages。〃

We　put　up　at　the　Willard；　and　in　the　morning　drove　over　to　the
Congressional　Library；　where　the　copyright　hearing　was　in　progress。　
There　was　a　joint　committee　of　the　two　Houses　seated　round　a　long　table
at　work；　and　a　number　of　spectators　more　or　less　interested　in　the　bill；
mainly；　it　would　seem；　men　concerned　with　the　protection　of　mechanical
music…rolls。　　The　fact　that　this　feature　was　mixed　up　with　literature　was
not　viewed　with　favor　by　most　of　the　writers。　　Clemens　referred　to　the
musical　contingent　as　〃those　hand…organ　men　who　ought　to　have　a　bill　of
their　own。〃

I　should　mention　that　early　that　morning　Clemens　had　written　this　letter
to　Speaker　Cannon：

December　7；　1906。

DEAR　UNCLE　JOSEPH；Please　get　me　the　thanks　of　the　Congressnot　next
week；　but　right　away。　　It　is　very　necessary。　　Do　accomplish　this　for　your
affectionate　old　friend　right　away；　by　persuasion；　if　you　can；　by
violence；　if　you　must；　for　it　is　imperatively　necessary　that　I　get　on　the
floor　for　two　or　three　hours　and　talk　to　the　members；　man　by　man；　in
behalf　of　the　support；　encouragement；　and　protection　of　one　of　the
nation's　most　valuable　assets　and　industriesits　literature。　　I　have
arguments　with　me；　also　a　barrel　with　liquid　in　it。

Give　me　a　chance。　　Get　me　the　thanks　of　Congress。　　Don't　wait　for　others
there　isn't　time。　　I　have　stayed　away　and　let　Congress　alone　for
seventy…one　years　and　I　am　entitled　to　thanks。　　Congress　knows　it
perfectly　well；　and　I　have　long　felt　hurt　that　this　quite　proper　and
earned　expression　of　gratitude　has　been　merely　felt　by　the　House　and
never　publicly　uttered。　　Send　me　an　order　on　the　Sergeant…at…Arms　quick。　
When　shall　I　come？　　
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　With　love　and　a　benediction；　
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　MARK　TWAIN。


We　went　over　to　the　Capitol　now　to　deliver　to　〃Uncle　Joe〃　this
characteristic　letter。　　We　had　picked　up　Clemens's　nephew；　Samuel　E。　
Moffett；　at　the　Library；　and　he　came　along　and　led　the　way　to　the
Speaker's　room。　　Arriving　there；　Clemens　laid　off　his　dark　overcoat　and
stood　there；　all　in　white；　certainly　a　startling　figure　among　those
clerks；　newspaper　men；　and　incidental　politicians。　　He　had　been　noticed
as　he　entered　the　Capitol；　and　a　number　of　reporters　had　followed　close
behind。　　Within　less　than　a　minute　word　was　being　passed　through　the
corridors　that　Mark　Twain　was　at　the　Capitol　in　his　white　suit。　　The
privileged　ones　began　to　gather；　and　a　crowd　assembled　in　the　hall
outside。

Speaker　Cannon　was　not　present　at　the　moment；　but　a　little　later　he
〃billowed〃　inwhich　seems　to　be　the　word　to　express　ithe　came　with
such　a　rush　and　tide　of　life。　　After　greetings；　Clemens　produced　the
letter　and　read　it　to　him　solemnly；　as　if　he　were　presenting　a　petition。　
Uncle　Joe　listened　quite　seriously；　his　head　bowed　a　little；　as　if　it
were　really　a　petition；　as　in　fact　it　was。　　He　smiled；　but　he　said；　quite
seriously：

〃That　is　a　request　that　ought　to　be　granted；　but　the　time　has　gone　by
when　I　am　permitted　any　such　liberties。　　Tom　Reed；　when　he　was　Speaker；
inaugurated　a　strict　precedent　excluding　all　outsiders　from　the　use　of
the　floor　of　the　House。〃

〃I　got　in　the　other　time；〃　Clemens　insisted。

〃Yes；〃　said　Uncle　Joe；　〃but　that　ain't　now。　　Sunset　Cox　could　let　you　in；
but　I　can't。　　They'd　hang　me。〃　　He　reflected　a　moment；　and　added：　〃I'll
tell　you　what　I'll　do：　I've　got　a　private　room　down…stairs　that　I　never
use。　　It's　all　fitted　up　with　table　and　desk；　stationery；　chinaware；　and
cutlery；　you　could　keep　house　there；　if　you　wanted　to。　　I'll　let　you　have
it　as　long　as　you　want　to　stay　here；　and　I'll　give　you　my　private
servant；　Neal；　who's　been　here　all　his　life　and　knows　every　official；
every　Senator　and　Representative；　and　they　all　know　him。　　He'll　bring　you
whatever　you　want；　and　you　can　send　in　messages　by　him。　　You　can　have　the
members　brought　down　singly　or　in　bunches；　and　convert　them　as　much　as
you　please。　　I'd　give　you　a　key　to　the　room；　only　I　haven't　got　one
myself。　　I　never　can　get　in　when　I　want　to；　but　Neal　can　get　in；　and
he'll　unlock　it　for　you。　　You　can　have　the　room；　and　you　can　have　Neal。　
Now；　will　that　do　you？〃

Clemens　said　it　would。　　It　was；　in　fact；　an　offer　without　precedent。　
Probably　never　in　the　history　of　the　country　had　a　Speaker　given　up　his
private　room　to　lobbyists。　　We　went　in　to　see　the　House　open；　and　then
went　down　with　Neal　and　took　possession　of　the　room。　　The　reporters　had
promptly　seized　upon　the　letter；　and　they　now　got　hold　of　its　author；　led
him　to　their　own　quarters；　and；　gathering　around　him；　fired　questions　at
him；　and　kept　their　note…books　busy。　　He　made　a　great　figure；　all　in
white　there　among　them；　and　they　didn't　fail　to　realize　the　value　of　it
as　〃copy。〃　　He　talked　about　copyright；　and　about　his　white　clothes；　and
about　a　silk　hat　which　Howells　wore。

Back　in　the　Speaker's　room；　at　last；　he　began　laying　out　the　campaign；
which　would　begin　next　day。　　By　and　by　he　said：

〃Look　here！　　I　believe　I've　got　to　speak　over　there　in　that　committee…
room　to…day　or　to…morrow。　　I　ought　to　know　just　when　it　is。〃

I　had　not　heard　of　this　before；　and　offered　to　go　over　and　see　about　it；
which　I　did　at　once。　　I　hurried　back　faster　than　I　had　gone。

〃Mr。　Clemens；　you　are　to　speak　in　half　an　hour；　and　the　room　is　crowded
full；　people　waiting　to　hear　you。〃

〃The　devil！〃　he　said。　　〃Well；　all　right；　I'll　just　lie　down　here　a　few
minutes　and　then　we'll　go　over。　　Take　paper　and　pencil　and　make　a　few
headings。〃

There　was　a　couch　in　the　room。　　He　lay　down　while　I　sat　at　the　table　with
a　pencil；　making　headings　now　and　then；　as　he　suggested；　and　presently　he
rose　and；　shoving　the　notes　into　his　pocket；　was　ready。　　It　was　half　past
three　when　we　entered　the　committee…room；　which　was　packed　with　people
and　rather　dimly　lighted；　for　it　was　gloomy　outside。　　Herbert　Putnam；　the
librarian；　led　us　to　seats　among　the　literary　group；　and　Clemens；
removing　his　overcoat；　stood　in　that　dim　room　clad　as　in　white　armor。　
There　was　a　perceptible　stir。　　Howells；　startled　for　a　moment；　whispered：

〃What　in　the　world　did　he　wear　that　white　suit　for？〃　though　in　his　heart
he　admired　it　as　much　as　the　others。

I　don't　remember　who　was　speaking　when　we　came　in；　but　he　was　saying
nothing　important。　　Whoever　it　was；　he　was　followed　by　Dr。　Edward　Everett
Hale；　whose　age　always　commanded　respect；　and　whose　words　always　invited
interest。　　Then　it　was　Mark　Twain's　turn。　　He　did　not　stand　by　his　chair；
as　the　others　had　done；　but　walked　over　to　the　Speaker's　table；　and；
turning；　faced　his　audience。　　I　have　never　seen　a　more　impressive　sight
than　that　snow…white　figure　in　that　dim…lit；　crowded　room。　　He　never
touched　his　notes；　he　didn't　even　remember　them。　　He　began　in　that　even；
quiet；　deliberate　voice　of　his　the　most　even；　the　most　quiet；　the　most
deliberate　voice　in　the　worldand；　without　a　break　or　a　hesitation　for　a
word；　he　delivered　a　copyright　argument；　full　of　humor　and　serious
reasoning；　such　a　speech　as　no　one　in　that　room；　I　suppose；　had　ever
heard。　　Certainly　it　was　a　fine　and　dramatic　bit　of　impromptu　pleading。
The　weary　committee；　which　had　been　tortured　all　day　with　dull；
statistical　arguments　made　by　the　mechanical　device　fiends；　and　dreary
platitudes　unloaded　by　men　whose　chief　ambition　was　to　shine　as　copyright
champions；　suddenly　realized　that　they　were　being　rewarded　for　the　long
waiting。　　They　began　to　brighten　and　freshen；　and　uplift　and　smile；　like
flowers　that　have　been　wilted　by　a　drought　when　comes