the notch on the ax and on being found out-第79章

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


some　of　the　results　of　that　evil。　　To　say　that；　is　to　say　that　the
last　years　of　her　life　must　have　been　weighted　heavily　enough　with
tragic　thought。〃

I　gave　a　little　shudder　of　repulsion。

〃That　is　a　depressing　view　of　life；　Alan；〃　I　said。　　〃Does　our　peace
of　mind　depend　only　upon　death　coming　early　enough　to　hide　from　us
the　truth？　　And；　after　all；　can　it？　　Our　spirits　do　not　die。　　From
another　world　they　may　witness　the　fruits　of　our　lives　in　this
one。〃

〃If　they　do；〃　he　answered　with　sudden　violence；　〃it　is　absurd　to
doubt　the　existence　of　a　purgatory。　　There　must　in　such　a　case　be　a
terrible　one　in　store　for　the　best　among　us。〃

I　was　silent。　　The　shadow　that　lay　on　his　soul　did　not　penetrate　to
mine；　but　it　hung　round　me　nevertheless；　a　cloud　which　I　felt
powerless　to　disperse。

After　a　moment　he　went　on；〃Provided　that　they　are　distant　enough；
how　little；　after　all；　do　we　think　of　the　results　of　our　actions！
There　are　few　men　who　would　deliberately　instill　into　a　child　a
love　of　drink；　or　wilfully　deprive　him　of　his　reason；　and　yet　a　man
with　drunkenness　or　madness　in　his　blood　thinks　nothing　of　bringing
children　into　the　world　tainted　as　deeply　with　the　curse　as　if　he
had　inoculated　them　with　it　directly。　　There　is　no　responsibility
so　completely　ignored　as　this　one　of　marriage　and　fatherhood；　and
yet　how　heavy　it　is　and　far…reaching。〃

〃Well；〃　I　said；　smiling；　〃let　us　console　ourselves　with　the　thought
that　we　are　not　all　lunatics　and　drunkards。〃

〃No；〃　he　answered；　〃but　there　are　other　evils　besides　these；　moral
taints　as　well　as　physical；　curses　which　have　their　roots　in　worlds
beyond　our　own；sins　of　the　fathers　which　are　visited　upon　the
children。〃

He　had　lost　all　violence　and　bitterness　of　tone　now；　but　the　weary
dejection　which　had　taken　their　place　communicated　itself　to　my
spirit　with　more　subtle　power　than　his　previous　mood　had　owned。

〃That　is　why；〃　he　went　on；　and　his　manner　seemed　to　give　more
purpose　to　his　speech　than　hitherto；〃that　is　why；　so　far　as　I　am
concerned；　I　mean　to　shirk　the　responsibility　and　remain
unmarried。〃

I　was　hardly　surprised　at　his　words。　　I　felt　that　I　had　expected
them；　but　their　utterance　seemed　to　intensify　the　gloom　which
rested　upon　us。　　Alan　was　the　first　to　arouse　himself　from　its
influence。

〃After　all；〃　he　said；　turning　round　to　me　and　speaking　lightly；
〃without　looking　so　far　and　so　deep；　I　think　my　resolve　is　a
prudent　one。　　Above　all　things；　let　us　take　life　easily；　and　you
know　what　St。　Paul　says　about　'trouble　in　the　flesh；'a　remark
which　I　am　sure　is　specially　applicable　to　briefless　barristers；
even　though　possessed　of　a　modest　competence　of　their　own。　　Perhaps
one　of　these　days；　when　I　am　a　fat　old　judge；　I　shall　give　my　cook
a　chance　if　she　is　satisfactory　in　her　clear　soups；　but　till　then　I
shall　expect　you；　Evie；　to　work　me　one　pair　of　carpet…slippers　per
annum；　as　tribute　due　to　a　bachelor　cousin。〃

I　don't　quite　know　what　I　answered；my　heart　was　heavy　and
aching；but　I　tried　with　true　feminine　docility　to　follow　the　lead
he　had　set　me。　　He　continued　for　some　time　in　the　same　vein；　but　as
we　approached　the　house　the　effort　seemed　to　become　too　much　for
him；　and　we　relapsed　again　into　silence。

This　time　I　was　the　first　to　break　it。　　〃I　suppose；〃　I　said；
drearily；　〃all　those　horrid　people　will　have　come　by　now。〃

〃Horrid　people；〃　he　repeated；　with　rather　an　uncertain　laugh；　and
through　the　darkness　I　saw　his　figure　bend　forward　as　he　stretched
out　his　hand　to　caress　my　horse's　neck。　　〃Why；　Evie；　I　thought　you
were　pining　for　gayety；　and　that　it　was；　in　fact；　for　the　purpose
of　meeting　these　'horrid　people'　that　you　came　here。〃

〃Yes；　I　know；〃　I　said；　wistfully；　〃but　somehow　the　last　week　has
been　so　pleasant　that　I　cannot　believe　that　anything　will　ever　be
quite　so　nice　again。〃

We　had　arrived　at　the　house　as　I　spoke；　and　the　groom　was　standing
at　our　horses'　heads。　　Alan　got　off　and　came　round　to　help　me　to
dismount；　but　instead　of　putting　up　his　arm　as　usual　as　a　support
for　me　to　spring　from；　he　laid　his　hand　on　mine。　　〃Yes；　Evie；〃　he
said；　〃it　has　been　indeed　a　pleasant　time。　　God　bless　you　for　it。〃
For　an　instant　he　stood　there　looking　up　at　me；　his　face　full　in
the　light　which　streamed　from　the　open　door；　his　gray　eyes　shining
with　a　radiance　which　was　not　wholly　from　thence。　　Then　he
straightened　his　arm；　I　sprang　to　the　ground；　and　as　if　to　preclude
the　possibility　of　any　answer　on　my　part；　he　turned　sharply　on　his
heel；　and　began　giving　some　orders　to　the　groom。　　I　went　on　alone
into　the　house；　feeling；　I　knew　not　and　cared　not　to　know　why；　that
the　gloom　had　fled　from　my　spirit；　and　that　the　last　ride　had　not
after　all　been　such　a　melancholy　failure　as　it　had　bid　fair　at　one
time　to　become。


III


In　the　hall　I　was　met　by　the　housekeeper；　who　informed　me　that；
owing　to　a　misunderstanding　about　dates；　a　gentleman　had　arrived
whom　Lucy　had　not　expected　at　that　time；　and　that　in　consequence　my
room　had　been　changed。　　My　things　had　been　put　into　the　East　Room；
the　haunted　room；the　room　of　the　Closed　Cabinet；　as　I　remembered
with　a　certain　sense　of　pleased　importance；　though　without　any
surprise。　　It　stood　apart　from　the　other　guest…rooms；　at　the　end　of
the　passage　from　which　opened　George　and　Lucy's　private　apartment；
and　as　it　was　consequently　disagreeable　to　have　a　stranger　there；
it　was　always　used　when　the　house　was　full　for　a　member　of　the
family。　　My　father　and　mother　had　often　slept　there：　there　was　a
little　room　next　to　it；　though　not　communicating　with　it；　which
served　for　a　dressing…room。　　Though　I　had　never　passed　the　night
there　myself；　I　knew　it　as　well　as　any　room　in　the　house。　　I　went
there　at　once；　and　found　Lucy　superintending　the　last　arrangements
for　my　comfort。

She　was　full　of　apologies　for　the　trouble　she　was　giving　me。　　I
told　her　that　the　apologies　were　due　to　my　maid　and　to　her　own
servants　rather　than　to　me；　〃and　besides；〃　I　added；　glancing　round；
〃I　am　distinctly　a　gainer　by　the　change。〃

〃You　know；　of　course；〃　she　said；　lightly；　〃that　this　is　the　haunted
room　of　the　house；　and　that　you　have　no　right　to　be　here？〃

〃I　know　it　is　the　haunted　room；〃　I　answered；　〃but　why　have　I　no
right　to　be　here？〃

〃Oh；　I　don't　know；〃　she　said。　　〃There　is　one　of　those　tiresome
Mervyn　traditions　against　allowing　unmarried　girls　to　sleep　in　this
room。　　I　believe　two　girls　died　in　it　a　hundred　and　fifty　years
ago；　or　something　of　that　sort。〃

〃But　I　should　think　that　people；　married　or　unmarried；　must　have
died　in　nearly　every　room　in　the　house；〃　I　objected。

〃Oh；　yes；　of　course　they　have；〃　said　Lucy；　〃but　once　you　come
across　a　bit　of　superstition　in　this　family；　it　is　of　no　use　to　ask
for　reasons。　　However；　this　particular　bit　is　too　ridiculous　even
for　George。　　Owing　to　Mr。　Leslie　having　come　to…day；　we　must　use
every　room　in　the　house：　it　is　intolerable　having　a　stranger　here；
and　you　are　the　only　relation　staying　with　us。　　I　pointed　all　that
out　to　George；　and　he　agreed　that；　under　the　circumstances；　it
would　be　absurd　not　to　put　you　here。〃

〃I　am　quite　agreeable；〃　I　answered；　〃and；　indeed；　I　think　I　am
rather　favored　in　having　a　room　where　the　last　recorded　death
appears　to　have　taken　place　a　hundred　and　fifty　years　ago；
particularly　as　I　should　think　that　there　can　be　scarcely　anything
now　left　in　it　which　was　here　then；　except；　of　course；　the
cabinet。〃

The　room　had；　in　fact；　been　entirely　done　up　and　refurnished　by　my
uncle；　and　was　as　bright　and　modern…looking　an　apartment　as　you
could　wish　to　see。　　It　was　large；　and　the　walls　were　covered　with
one　of　those　white　and　gold　papers　which　were　fashionable　thirty
years　ago。　　Opposite　us；　as　we　stood　warming　our　backs　before　the
fire；　was　the　beda　large　double　one；　hung　with　a　pretty　shade　of
pale　blue。　　Material　of　the　same　color　covered　the　comfortable
modern　furniture；　and　hung　from　gilded　cornices　before　the　two
windows　which　pierced　the　side　of　the　room　on　our　left。　　Between
them　stood　the　toilet…table；　all　muslin；　blue　ribbons；　and　silver。
The　carpet　was　a　gray　and　blue　Brussels　one。　　The　whole　effect　was
cheerful；　though　I　fear　inartist