the notch on the ax and on being found out-第67章
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have been under others； and moved partly by the sense that
Lieschen's love had practically drawn Kerkel within the familyfor
her choice of him as a husband had made him morally； if not
legally； a son…in…law； and moved partly by the sense of loneliness
which had now settled on their childless home；Lehfeldt had in the
most pathetic and considerate terms begged Kerkel to take the place
of his adopted son； and become joint partner with him in the
business。 This； however； Kerkel had gently yet firmly declined。
He averred that he felt no injury； though great pain had been
inflicted on him by the examination。 He himself in such a case
would not have shrunk from demanding that his own brother should be
tried； under suspicions of similar urgency。 It was simple justice
that all who were suspected should be examined； justice also to
them that they might for ever clear themselves of doubtful
appearances。 But for the rest； while he felt his old affectionate
respect for his master； he could recognize no claim to be removed
from his present position。 Had she lived； said the heartbroken
youth； he would gladly have consented to accept any fortune which
her love might bestow； because he felt that his own love and the
devotion of a life might repay it。 But there was nothing now that
he could give in exchange。 For his services he was amply paid； his
feelings towards Lieschen's parents must continue what they had
ever been。 In vain Lehfeldt pleaded； in vain many friends argued。
Franz remained respectfully firm in his refusal。
This； as I said； interested Bourgonef immensely。 He seemed to
enter completely into the minds of the sorrowing； pleading parents；
and the sorrowing； denying lover。 He appreciated and expounded
their motives with a subtlety and delicacy of perception which
surprised and delighted me。 It showed the refinement of his moral
nature。 But； at the same time； it rendered his minor degree of
interest in the other episodes of the story； those which had a more
direct and overpowering appeal to the heart； a greater paradox。
Human nature is troubled in the presence of all mystery which has
not by long familiarity lost its power of soliciting attention； and
for my own part； I have always been uneasy in the presence of moral
problems。 Puzzled by the contradictions which I noticed in
Bourgonef； I tried to discover whether he had any general
repugnance to stories of crimes； or any special repugnance to
murders； or； finally； any strange repugnance to this particular
case now everywhere discussed。 And it is not a little remarkable
that during three separate interviews； in the course of which I
severally； and as I thought artfully； introduced these topics；
making them seem to arise naturally out of the suggestion of our
talk； I totally failed to arrive at any distinct conclusion。 I was
afraid to put the direct question： Do you not share the common
feeling of interest in criminal stories？ This question would
doubtless have elicited a categorical reply； but somehow； the
consciousness of an arriere…pensee made me shrink from putting such
a question。
Reflecting on this indifference on a special point； and on the
numerous manifestations I had noticed of his sensibility； I came at
last to the conclusion that he must be a man of tender heart； whose
delicate sensibilities easily shrank from the horrible under every
form； and no more permitted him to dwell unnecessarily upon painful
facts； than they permit imaginative minds to dwell on the details
of an operation。
I had not long settled this in my mind before an accident suddenly
threw a lurid light upon many details noticed previously； and
painfully revived that inexplicable repulsion with which I had at
first regarded him。 A new suspicion filled my mind； or rather； let
me say； a distinct shape was impressed upon many fluctuating
suspicions。 It scarcely admitted of argument； and at times seemed
preposterous； nevertheless it persisted。 The mind which in broad
daylight assents to all that can be alleged against the absurdities
of the belief in apparitions； will often acknowledge the dim
terrors of darkness and lonelinessterrors at possibilities of
supernatural visitations。 In like manner； in the clear daylight of
reason I could see the absurdity of my suspicion； but the vague
stirrings of feeling remained unsilenced。 I was haunted by the dim
horrors of a possibility。
Thus it arose。 We were both going to Munich； and Bourgonef had
shortened his contemplated stay at Nuremberg that he might have the
pleasure of accompanying me； adding also that he； too； should be
glad to reach Munich； not only for its art； but for its greater
command of papers and intelligence respecting what was then going
on in France。 On the night preceding the morning of our departure；
I was seated in his room； smoking and discussing as usual； while
Ivan； his servant； packed up his things in two large portmanteaus。
Ivan was a serf who spoke no word of any language but his own。
Although of a brutal； almost idiotic type； he was loudly eulogized
by his master as the model of fidelity and usefulness。 Bourgonef
treated him with gentleness； though with a certain imperiousness；
much as one might treat a savage mastiff which it was necessary to
dominate without exasperating。 He more than once spoke of Ivan as
a living satire on physiognomists and phrenologists； and as I am a
phrenologist； I listened with some incredulity。
〃Look at him；〃 he would say。 〃Observe the low； retreating brow；
the flat face； the surly mouth； the broad base of the head； and the
huge bull…like neck。 Would not anyone say Ivan was as destructive
as a panther； as tenacious as a bull…dog； as brutal as a bull？ Yet
he is the gentlest of sluggish creatures； and as tender…hearted as
a girl！ That thick…set muscular frame shrouds a hare's heart。 He
is so faithful and so attached that I believe for me he would risk
his life； but on no account could you get him to place himself in
danger on his own account。 Part of his love for me is gratitude
for having rescued him from the conscription： the dangers incident
to a military life had no charm for him！〃
Now； although Bourgonef； who was not a phrenologist； might be
convinced of the absence of ferocious instincts in Ivan； to me； as
a phrenologist； the statement was eminently incredible。 All the
appearances of his manner were such as to confirm his master's
opinion。 He was quiet； even tender in his attentions。 But the
tyrannous influence of ideas and physical impressions cannot be set
aside； and no evidence would permanently have kept down my distrust
of this man。 When women shriek at the sight of a gun； it is in
vain that you solemnly assure them that the gun is not loaded。 〃I
don't know；〃 they reply；〃at any rate； I don't like it。〃 I was
much in this attitude with regard to Ivan。 He might be harmless。
I didn't know that； what I did know wasthat I didn't like his
looks。
On this night he was moving noiselessly about the room； employed in
packing。 Bourgonef's talk rambled over the old themes； and I
thought I had never before met with one of my own age whose society
was so perfectly delightful。 He was not so conspicuously my
superior on all points that I felt the restraints inevitably
imposed by superiority； yet he was in many respects sufficiently
above me in knowledge and power to make me eager to have his assent
to my views where we differed； and to have him enlighten me where I
knew myself to be weak。
In the very moment of my most cordial admiration came a shock。
Ivan； on passing from one part of the room to the other； caught his
foot in the strap of the portmanteau and fell。 The small wooden
box； something of a glove…box； which he held in his hand at the
time； fell on the floor； and falling over； discharged its contents
close to Bourgonef's feet。 The objects which caught my eyes were
several pairs of gloves； a rouge…pot and hare's foot； and a black
beard！
By what caprice of imagination was it that the sight of this false
beard lying at Bourgonef's feet thrilled me with horror？ In one
lightning…flash I beheld the archwaythe stranger with the
startled eyesth
