anecdotes of the late samuel johnson-第22章

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。　Goldsmith　came　to　his　friend；　fretting　and　foaming；　and　vowing　vengeance　against　the　printer；　etc。；　till　Mr。　Johnson；　tired　of　the　bustle；　and　desirous　to　think　of　something　else；　cried　out　at　last；　〃Why；　what　would'st　thou　have；　dear　Doctor！　who　the　plague　is　hurt　with　all　this　nonsense？　and　how　is　a　man　the　worse；　I　wonder；　in　his　health；　purse；　or　character；　for　being　called　Holofernes？〃　　〃I　do　not　know；〃　replies　the　other；　〃how　you　may　relish　being　called　Holofernes；　but　I　do　not　like　at　least　to　play　Goodman　Dull。〃

Dr。　Johnson　was　indeed　famous　for　disregarding　public　abuse。　　When　the　people　criticised　and　answered　his　pamphlets；　papers；　etc。；　〃Why；　now；　these　fellows　are　only　advertising　my　book；〃　he　would　say；　〃it　is　surely　better　a　man　should　be　abused　than　forgotten。〃　　When　Churchill　nettled　him；　however；　it　is　certain　he　felt　the　sting；　or　that　poet's　works　would　hardly　have　been　left　out　of　the　edition。　　Of　that；　however；　I　have　no　right　to　decide；　the　booksellers；　perhaps；　did　not　put　Churchill　on　their　list。　　I　know　Mr。　Johnson　was　exceedingly　zealous　to　declare　how　very　little　he　had　to　do　with　the　selection。　　Churchill's　works；　too；　might　possibly　be　rejected　by　him　upon　a　higher　principle；　the　highest；　indeed；　if　he　was　inspired　by　the　same　laudable　motive　which　made　him　reject　every　authority　for　a　word　in　his　dictionary　that　could　only　be　gleaned　from　writers　dangerous　to　religion　or　morality。　　〃I　would　not；〃　said　he；　〃send　people　to　look　for　words　in　a　book；　that　by　such　a　casual　seizure　of　the　mind　might　chance　to　mislead　it　for　ever。〃　　In　consequence　of　this　delicacy；　Mrs。　Montague　once　observed；　〃That　were　an　angel　to　give　the　imprimatur；　Dr。　Johnson's　works　were　among　those　very　few　which　would　not　be　lessened　by　a　line。〃　　That　such　praise　from　such　a　lady　should　delight　him；　is　not　strange；　insensibility　in　a　case　like　that　must　have　been　the　result　alone　of　arrogance　acting　on　stupidity。　　Mr。　Johnson　had　indeed　no　dislike　to　the　commendations　which　he　knew　he　deserved。　　〃What　signifies　protesting　so　against　flattery！〃　would　he　cry；　〃when　a　person　speaks　well　of　one；　it　must　be　either　true　or　false；　you　know；　if　true；　let　us　rejoice　in　his　good　opinion；　if　he　lies；　it　is　a　proof　at　least　that　he　loves　more　to　please　me　than　to　sit　silent　when　he　need　say　nothing。〃

That　natural　roughness　of　his　manner　so　often　mentioned　would；　notwithstanding　the　regularity　of　his　notions；　burst　through　them　all　from　time　to　time；　and　he　once　bade　a　very　celebrated　lady；　who　praised　him　with　too　much　zeal；　perhaps；　or　perhaps　too　strong　an　emphasis　（which　always　offended　him）；　〃Consider　what　her　flattery　was　worth　before　she　choked　HIM　with　it。〃　　A　few　more　winters　passed　in　the　talking　world　showed　him　the　value　of　that　friend's　commendations；　however；　and　he　was　very　sorry　for　the　disgusting　speech　he　made　her。

I　used　to　think　Mr。　Johnson's　determined　preference　of　a　cold；　monotonous　talker　over　an　emphatical　and　violent　one　would　make　him　quite　a　favourite　among　the　men　of　ton；　whose　insensibility；　or　affectation　of　perpetual　calmness；　certainly　did　not　give　to　him　the　offence　it　does　to　many。　　He　loved　〃conversation　without　effort；〃　he　said；　and　the　encomiums　I　have　heard　him　so　often　pronounce　on　the　manners　of　Topham　Beaucler　in　society　constantly　ended　in　that　peculiar　praise；　that　〃it　was　without　EFFORT。〃

We　were　talking　of　Richardson；　who　wrote　〃Clarissa。〃　　〃You　think　I　love　flattery；〃　says　Dr。　Johnson；　〃and　so　I　do；　but　a　little　too　much　always　disgusts　me。　　That　fellow　Richardson；　on　the　contrary；　could　not　be　contented　to　sail　quietly　down　the　stream　of　reputation　without　longing　to　taste　the　froth　from　every　stroke　of　the　oar。〃

With　regard　to　slight　insults　from　newspaper　abuse；　I　have　already　declared　his　notions。　　〃They　sting　one；〃　says　he；　〃but　as　a　fly　stings　a　horse；　and　the　eagle　will　not　catch　flies。〃　　He　once　told　me；　however；　that　Cummyns；　the　famous　Quaker；　whose　friendship　he　valued　very　highly；　fell　a　sacrifice　to　their　insults；　having　declared　on　his　death…bed　to　Dr。　Johnson　that　the　pain　of　an　anonymous　letter；　written　in　some　of　the　common　prints　of　the　day；　fastened　on　his　heart；　and　threw　him　into　the　slow　fever　of　which　he　died。

Nor　was　Cummyns　the　only　valuable　member　so　lost　to　society。　　Hawkesworth；　the　pious；　the　virtuous；　and　the　wise；　for　want　of　that　fortitude　which　casts　a　shield　before　the　merits　of　his　friend；　fell　a　lamented　sacrifice　to　wanton　malice　and　cruelty；　I　know　not　how　provoked；　but　all　in　turn　feel　the　lash　of　censure　in　a　country　where；　as　every　baby　is　allowed　to　carry　a　whip；　no　person　can　escape　except　by　chance。　　The　unpublished　crimes；　unknown　distresses；　and　even　death　itself；　however；　daily　occurring　in　less　liberal　governments　and　less　free　nations；　soon　teach　one　to　content　oneself　with　such　petty　grievances；　and　make　one　acknowledge　that　the　undistinguishing　severity　of　newspaper　abuse　may　in　some　measure　diminish　the　diffusion　of　vice　and　folly　in　Great　Britain；　and　while　they　fright　delicate　minds　into　forced　refinements　and　affected　insipidity；　they　are　useful　to　the　great　causes　of　virtue　in　the　soul　and　liberty　in　the　State；　and　though　sensibility　often　sinks　under　the　roughness　of　their　prescriptions；　it　would　be　no　good　policy　to　take　away　their　licence。

Knowing　the　state　of　Mr。　Johnson's　nerves；　and　how　easily　they　were　affected；　I　forbore　reading　in　a　new　magazine；　one　day；　the　death　of　a　Samuel　Johnson　who　expired　that　month；　but　my　companion　snatching　up　the　book；　saw　it　himself；　and　contrary　to　my　expectation；　〃Oh！〃　said　he；　〃I　hope　Death　will　now　be　glutted　with　Sam　Johnsons；　and　let　me　alone　for　some　time　to　come；　I　read　of　another　namesake's　departure　last　week。〃　　Though　Mr。　Johnson　was　commonly　affected　even　to　agony　at　the　thoughts　of　a　friend's　dying；　he　troubled　himself　very　little　with　the　complaints　they　might　make　to　him　about　ill…health。　　〃Dear　Doctor；〃　said　he　one　day　to　a　common　acquaintance；　who　lamented　the　tender　state　of　his　INSIDE；　〃do　not　be　like　the　spider；　man；　and　spin　conversation　thus　incessantly　out　of　thy　own　bowels。〃　　I　told　him　of　another　friend　who　suffered　grievously　with　the　gout。　　〃He　will　live　a　vast　many　years　for　all　that；〃　replied　he；　〃and　then　what　signifies　how　much　he　suffers！　　But　he　will　die　at　last；　poor　fellow；　there's　the　misery；　gout　seldom　takes　the　fort　by　a　coup…de…main；　but　turning　the　siege　into　a　blockade；　obliges　it　to　surrender　at　discretion。〃

A　lady　he　thought　well　of　was　disordered　in　her　health。　　〃What　help　has　she　called　in？〃　inquired　Johnson。　　〃Dr。　James；　sir；〃　was　the　reply。　　〃What　is　her　disease？〃　　〃Oh；　nothing　positive；　rather　a　gradual　and　gentle　decline。〃　〃She　will　die；　then；　pretty　dear！〃　answered　he。　　〃When　Death's　pale　horse　runs　away　with　a　person　on　full　speed；　an　active　physician　may　possibly　give　them　a　turn；　but　if　he　carries　them　on　an　even；　slow　pace；　down…hill；　too！　no　care　nor　skill　can　save　them！〃

When　Garrick　was　on　his　last　sick…bed；　no　arguments；　or　recitals　of　such　facts　as　I　had　heard；　would　persuade　Mr。　Johnson　of　his　danger。　　He　had　prepossessed　himself　with　a　notion；　that　to　say　a　man　was　sick　was　very　near　wishing　him　so；　and　few　things　offended　him　more　than　prognosticating　even　the　death　of　an　ordinary　acquaintance。　　〃Ay；　ay；〃　said　he；　〃Swift　knew　the　world　pretty　well　when　he　said　that

　　　　　'Some　dire　misfortune　to　portend；　　　　　　　No　enemy　can　match　a　friend。'〃

The　danger；　then；　of　Mr。　Garrick；　or　of　Mr。　Thrale；　whom　he　loved　better；　was　an　image　which　no　one　durst　present　before　his　view；　he　always　persisted　in　the　possibility　and　hope　of　their　recovering　disorders　from　which　no　human　creatures　by　human　means　alone　ever　did　recover。　　His　distress　for　their　loss　was　for　that　very　reason　poignant　to　excess。　　But　his　fears　of　his　own　salvation　were　excessive。　　His　truly　tolerant　spirit　and　Christian　charity；　which　HOPETH　ALL　THINGS；　and　BELIEVETH　ALL　THINGS；　made　him　rely　securely　on　the　safety　of　his　friends；　while　his　earnest　aspiration　after　a　blessed　immortality　made　him　cautious　of　his　own　steps；　and　timorous　concerning　their　consequences。　　He　knew　how　much　had　been　given；　and　filled　his　mind　with　fancies　of　how　much　would　be　requi